Is it fair to make a guy jealous to keep him interested?

[Mikodite]

I'm being reminded of a common sitcom situation where person A in a relationship, usually a guy but sometimes a girl, will do things in an attempt to get a jealous reaction from person B like emphasizing the fact that they has a sexy co-worker compatible orientation and gender, and announcing over-elaborately that they are spending time with them. At first it doesn't work, not because person B thinks person A is an undesirable mass of meat, but because person B is a secure human being that trusts person A. There gets to a point where something happens that makes person B jealous which ends up being a coincidental action from some other character in the show that gets misread by person B and they confront person A and anyone involved, directly and knowingly or not, in person A's scheme. Person A admits they felt like they were taken for granted and person B insist that wasn't the case and they make up and shit. THE END

Doesn't that sound like the illogical nonsense that plagues a bad sitcom? I can't help but scream at the TV "OMFG grow up you immature, insecure manchild and stop playing games! Your with a girl that trusts you enough that you can go out on the town and she won't give you the third degree cuz she will assume you behaved yourself like an adult."

Hope that makes sense.

 

[DeathWyrmNexus]

Ask her what she will think when you tell him what she is up to. That outta get an agape look from her. If the situation was reversed, would she want him to flirt with other folks to piss her off?

 

[Creator002]

She sounds insecure to me. If I had a girlfriend that was doing that, I'd tell her to stop or find a new boyfriend.
You never know when she'll cross that line.

 

[Zeema]

Sounds like a crappy thing to do to her boyfriend.

pretty much wat was going through my head

no offensive but i don't like that girl very much

 

[zedel]

"All is fair in love and war"

That said, it is fair, it's just a mean and stupid thing to do. :/ Though, if he didn't have issues with obvious flirtation, he's either pretty secure or he doesn't care.

 

[theevilgenius60]

Is it fair?...yeah, but is it right. No, it can only lead two places: Destruction of the relationship through mistrust, or building of the relationship through negative means, thus making it unhealthy

 

[Laser Priest]

I'd say it's entirely fair.

I'd just like to point out that it doesn't bloody work.

It makes you seem dishonest and if you come forth with your motives, you seem manipulative. It's a perfect way to ruin a relationship through pure lack of sense.

 

[Tselis]

No. speaking as a woman I can say that anyone who does this 1) is stupid, 2) is in a bad relationship, and 3) deserves their bad relationship (because they are shallow and stupid).

 

[GigaHz]

Yes it is fair.

Because any guy worth his skin knows not to tolerate a woman's bullshit. Jealousy is more of a high school thing anyway.

 

[Kurokami]

Yes it is fair.

Because any guy worth his skin knows not to tolerate a woman's bullshit. Jealousy is more of a high school thing anyway.

I wouldn't trade my skin for yours, it seems too thick and tough around the head.

Fairness doesn't come into it, really. Relationships are a powerplay. She's free to try it, but in exchange the guy would or should return in kind, and it'll likely destroy the relationship, or at least make it an unhappy one. Better off finding a woman without this bs.

(PS: I only insulted you because you didn't really account for context)

 

[Redhawkmillenium]

Bad, bad idea. If a girl was to flirt with another guy I would think she is not interested in me; if she was already my GF I would break up with her if she took it too far.

 

[Krantos]

Two things (obviously IMO):

1. If you have to make a guy jealous to stay interested in you, he's not that into you.

2. If a girl flirts with other guys while dating you, you'd be better off looking elsewhere.

 

[Ruedyn]

No justification should be allowed in a situation like that. That is ridiculous.

I saw that picture on google awhile ago and laughed pretty hard at it. Good times.

I'm curious whether this is a high schooler or a woman. If it is the latter no, it isn't a fair thing to do and rather stupid. If it is the former than it still isn't right but I suppose it's a little bit more forgivable. Most people are dumb around that time.

 

[Vault101]

if she has to do that to keep her boyfreind internested then its probably not going to work out

 

[GigaHz]

Yes it is fair.

Because any guy worth his skin knows not to tolerate a woman's bullshit. Jealousy is more of a high school thing anyway.

I wouldn't trade my skin for yours, it seems too thick and tough around the head.

Fairness doesn't come into it, really. Relationships are a powerplay. She's free to try it, but in exchange the guy would or should return in kind, and it'll likely destroy the relationship, or at least make it an unhappy one. Better off finding a woman without this bs.

(PS: I only insulted you because you didn't really account for context)

Actually, the point sailed right over your head as I did account for context. I just put a snarky spin on it.

But fine. I guess I will explain myself.

If a girl decides to try and make a guy jealous as a power play, it is a great indicator for the guy. Now that her maturity level is on display, the guy can rethink if she is worth pursuing. If she is shameless about one petty game, she's probably not above having a few more up her sleeves. A sure recipe for drama and future headaches.

So to reiterate, yes it is fair. Why shouldn't the guy be warned in advance if the girl has issues?

 

[Samurai Goomba]

That would make me more angry with her than anything else. Screw "wanting what you can't have," if I'm in the boyfriend's position, I want an honest relationship. She wants to leave? Let her, but she shouldn't be screwing with his head. She doesn't want to leave? She shouldn't act like she does, then, because he may decide he's justified in doing some cheating or dumping her later.

 

[Clipper]

I think it's sort of justified, but she is taking a rather large risk there. How can she be certain he's not gonna leave her?