Teens in high school, and people of teenage mentality on the internet, exaggerate. There's a concept out there that everyone sleeps around, does drugs, and smokes; so everyone claims that they do.
Most of them don't.
I don't think your values are elitist. You believe that sex is a personal thing, or at least you respect it in some way, and you've had the self-discipline to save yourself, you're just looking for someone with the same attitude about sex. Quite frankly, that's healthy, you don't want to have sex with someone who doesn't have the same values about it as you do (true for all points-of-view on sex). I would say, though, that if you do find someone who is a good fit for you, and she isn't a virgin, it is something worth looking past, maybe they've changed their mind about it after experiencing it (it has that effect on a lot of people).
Same with smoking and drugs. I didn't see alcohol in your list, but drugs, which in the U.S. is specifically not tobacco or alcohol, but "illicit" drugs. That's not elitist, tobacco, alcohol, and other addictive substances can become big lifestyle factors, and you've decided that you don't want those in your life, it wouldn't be fair to anyone to compromise on that in a relationship. Now then, again, if we're talking never done those things, yes, good luck with that, everyone has tried different things at different points in their lives. If you mean that maybe they tried it, maybe they didn't, but decided not to make a habit of it, that's not an unreasonable criterion.
Finally, you are in high school, forget about all this crap for now. You aren't going to know who you are for another five to ten years at least, let alone be able to determine who someone else will be in that time, and especially not what you would actually want in such a person. Sex, drugs, relationships, just don't sweat it. Do what you feel comfortable with, and hang out with people you are comfortable with. More importantly, when you do start looking for an actual relationship like that, look for someone who is comfortable with themselves.
There will always be people with similar values to you, maybe not all of them (a few differences are what keep relationships going), the important part is that you actually take time to figure out what yours are, and which you really feel that you want to stick to. Maybe you'll have the same values you have now until the day you die, you'll find someone who fits.
Honestly, though: through high school and college, you got enough to deal with without throwing "romantic" relationships into it.
Me, I've only had sex with my wife, and her with me. Together 8 years, married 4 of those. Sex was something we explored together, and I appreciate the fact that it is special to us as a couple. Some people don't have that and also couldn't care less, more power to them. We don't smoke, we don't drink, and we don't do drugs. Neither of us really had an interest in those things, but we don't condemn anyone who does.
Also, never appeal to the internet for advice or moral guidance. ;-)
