Is it that hard to find a virgin?
- Thread starter Death God
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Well that is me pretty much, at parties with mates I wouldn't drink alchole I did take a sip of beer or what ever But it tasted terrible so I didn't have anymore untill I was in uni.
Have sex was the only thing but it was with my girlfriend and it was both our first time so I don't see anything wrong with that, I believe we were both 18 and definitly sober when it happened.
Have sex was the only thing but it was with my girlfriend and it was both our first time so I don't see anything wrong with that, I believe we were both 18 and definitly sober when it happened.
I don't see where I said "all men". You mean my addressing "men in this thread"?Togs said:
I can change it to "men in this thread except Togs" if you like.
In all seriousness, I don't make a habit of tarring all men with the same brush and if you feel I have here then it was unintentional, and I apologise - but you have to admit, the level of what-the-fuckery in this thread is off the charts. I've always seen Escapists as a more civilised, educated breed of forum users. Now I want to stab a worrying number of them with a spork.
Chances are pretty good the majority of your class are not out having sex, smoking, drinking and doing drugs on a regular basis, despite what it must have felt like at the time. Given the opportunity, they may have tried a cigarette or drank a beer while under the legal limit, but if they live in a decent neighborhood and have parents that care about them, they aren't going to have the unsupervised time and necessary resources to do that much.
My guess is that the students and teacher in your class are responding to the image of the "average" high school student portrayed in movies and tv over the last few decades. It's becoming more and more common to show the main character or his/her friends indulging in risk behaviors without the usual moral lesson of "and then something bad happens" to drive home the point that illegal drugs, under-aged drink, and teenage sex are a bad idea. Along with increasing media coverage of teen pregnancies and rise in illegal drug use, it's not that surprising that people get the feeling they might be the only one NOT doing all this stuff.
But realistically, the people who are heavily into these kind of behaviors are not the majority in most schools - and if you are at the kind of school where it is common, you would have figured it out a lot sooner then today. The metal detectors at the doors would have been a dead give-away.
My guess is that the students and teacher in your class are responding to the image of the "average" high school student portrayed in movies and tv over the last few decades. It's becoming more and more common to show the main character or his/her friends indulging in risk behaviors without the usual moral lesson of "and then something bad happens" to drive home the point that illegal drugs, under-aged drink, and teenage sex are a bad idea. Along with increasing media coverage of teen pregnancies and rise in illegal drug use, it's not that surprising that people get the feeling they might be the only one NOT doing all this stuff.
But realistically, the people who are heavily into these kind of behaviors are not the majority in most schools - and if you are at the kind of school where it is common, you would have figured it out a lot sooner then today. The metal detectors at the doors would have been a dead give-away.
Second year of University and still haven't had a girlfriend, drank or smoked.Death God said:
I sorta share your points. I don't like drunk people and neither do I enjoy sitting in the smell of tobacco.
I would rather have a girlfriend who hadn't had a friend before, or I would feel like I'm so behind. She would already have had her first date/kiss/dinner at home/whatever.
look at the number of people on earth today, there are more virgins now than there were while virginity belts were still legal. however the ratio of virgin to non-virgin is definitely more discouraging. Rest assured there are still plenty of people out there who have higher standards in most communities, but society has popularized a libertine attitude that views morals as ignorant prejudices, making it hard to find them.
See, when you're drunk mundane things become awesome. Because the ground is always moving. It's all the fun of an earthquake and none of the most terrible consequences. (structural damage, mass death, that sort of thing. I know there are other consequences.)TehCookie said:You can't do awesome things drunk, since well... you're drunk. All the awesome things I did when I was sober, and if someone did them drunk they got hurt since you needed to not be an idiot.AverageJoe said:Oh boy, you sound like such a fun person to be around OP!!
With those "morals", good luck being single for the rest of your life if you don't find your life partner by the time you're 21. Because you will.
Your moral system is elitist and archaic, and with an attitude like that you deserve to be alone.
Also, people who don't drink tell boring stories. Fact.
I failed everything except virginity...now I'm sad.
Where I live, it would be very difficult finding someone like that but not impossible.
Where I live, it would be very difficult finding someone like that but not impossible.
Gaming culture is pretty damn misogynistic. Probably because it's mostly male. And it's mostly male because it's misogynistic! It's a vicious cycle.brownstudies said:I don't see where I said "all men". You mean my addressing "men in this thread"?Togs said:
I can change it to "men in this thread except Togs" if you like.
In all seriousness, I don't make a habit of tarring all men with the same brush and if you feel I have here then it was unintentional, and I apologise - but you have to admit, the level of what-the-fuckery in this thread is off the charts. I've always seen Escapists as a more civilised, educated breed of forum users. Now I want to stab a worrying number of them with a spork.
Edit: And the Escapist is probably better than most places in gaming. *cough* xboxlive *cough*.
Well it's not impossible, but it sure as hell will be difficult. With popular culture constantly showing sex, drinkin, and the use of illicit drugs in a fun light, it's no surprise that most people have done all those things by the time they get into high school.
I didn't, but that's just me. I simply never gave a shit about that stuff (and still don't!). Anyway, you just keep dating people, and I'm sure you'll find that one faithful girl.
I didn't, but that's just me. I simply never gave a shit about that stuff (and still don't!). Anyway, you just keep dating people, and I'm sure you'll find that one faithful girl.
this, +1, /thread, agreed, qft, etc etc etc all of those thingsbrownstudies said:
There's nothing else that needs to be said at all. I can understand (and wholeheartedly disagree with) OPs stance on drugs, smoking and alcohol, but rejecting someone on the fact that they've had sex is.. I don't even know. Either tragic or disturbing.
I guess when it comes to having your virginity at age 20 and above, my judgment isn't, "Haaaa you can't get any ass!" as much as it is, "Wow, you've never been intimate with another person. That's pretty pathetic." Because seriously, if you get to that certain point with a person, you WILL have sex. It's not even a probability thing. You'll either have sex or you'll break up, which means you weren't that close to begin with.
So what you're looking for more likely than not is a girl who is either asocial or emotionally damaged in some way that she has been unsuccessful in making positive, healthy relationships with other human beings. A lot of people SAY, "Oh, I remain a virgin by choice," but what that translates to more often than not is, "I push away people as soon as they get too close, and if they can't handle not being close, they can just fuck off." It's basic psychology. To deny sexual urges and opportunity (especially with someone who is close) is highly unnatural.
So what you're looking for more likely than not is a girl who is either asocial or emotionally damaged in some way that she has been unsuccessful in making positive, healthy relationships with other human beings. A lot of people SAY, "Oh, I remain a virgin by choice," but what that translates to more often than not is, "I push away people as soon as they get too close, and if they can't handle not being close, they can just fuck off." It's basic psychology. To deny sexual urges and opportunity (especially with someone who is close) is highly unnatural.
And
Now OP: it's 2011, not the dark ages, welcome to today
THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU, you said what I was thinking! I owe you a coffee or other fine beveragebrownstudies said:
Now OP: it's 2011, not the dark ages, welcome to today
What is it with these threads lately? I have seen several over probably 2 weeks. Either way, grow up. I find the OP to be stinking with selfishness and perhaps emotionally damaged, as do most of the OPs of these threads. I am not attempting to insult the OP so stop your internal dialog. They have a difficult viewpoint, then come on these forums to, I think, be comforted by like minded people.
Sex is natural. People blow its significance WAY out of proportion. The significance of sex is connected to the feelings you share with the person. Best sex I have ever had was with my X fiance. Never mind the break up. Leaps and bounds above any other sexual encounter. Casual sex is just a physical release. Learn to understand the difference.
As far as drugs and booze, I like booze but drugs just are not worth the effort. If that isn't your "scene", then you come off as an introvert who dislikes people. Stop your internal dialog. You don't like people. You like the 2 people you hang out with 30 hours a week. I bet you would be uncomfortable with 10 people in a room, only 2 you know when there is zero illegal activity going on. Come to terms with the fact you aren't that fun of a person in the social scene and seek like minded people who only appreciate a few close friends. While not "bad" in any way, it is just less common. Find your own fun.
Sex is natural. People blow its significance WAY out of proportion. The significance of sex is connected to the feelings you share with the person. Best sex I have ever had was with my X fiance. Never mind the break up. Leaps and bounds above any other sexual encounter. Casual sex is just a physical release. Learn to understand the difference.
As far as drugs and booze, I like booze but drugs just are not worth the effort. If that isn't your "scene", then you come off as an introvert who dislikes people. Stop your internal dialog. You don't like people. You like the 2 people you hang out with 30 hours a week. I bet you would be uncomfortable with 10 people in a room, only 2 you know when there is zero illegal activity going on. Come to terms with the fact you aren't that fun of a person in the social scene and seek like minded people who only appreciate a few close friends. While not "bad" in any way, it is just less common. Find your own fun.
I'll be honest, you're really just setting yourself up for dissapointment with those rules.Death God said:
If you find the girl of your dreams, but OH NOES she's had sex, you're going to just ignore her? People have sex, it's a fact of life, and it's nothing to be morally ashamed of or against, it's the 21st century, it's okay now. What if she was in a relationship before she met you with someone she really loved, and they had sex because they loved each other, but the relationship hit a rough patch and they ended up splitting up etc, etc. Does that make her "tainted" or "morally wrong"?
Drinking; most people drink...because most people enjoy it, and again, if you find the girl of your dreams, and god forbid, she drinks (y'know like in the way regular people "drink") that shouldn't be grounds for just fobbing her off.
Drugs, okay fair enough, I don't see anything wrong with them, but if you don't like them then I'll respect that choice. Even though, I will put this out there: Say you like EVERYTHING about her except the fact she smokes pot...what then?
You're almost never going to find a T Total virgin, and if you do, well..it's quite likely they're not going to be the person you want to spend the rest of your life with.
Did it really take until now for a post like this to pop up in this thread? For shame.brownstudies said:
But yes, well put, brownstudies. Being of the mindset that sex is as natural an act as breathing, I'm a little worried someone has this view of non-virgin women being "dirty."
Either it's that archaic "purity" bullshit or a deep-rooted insecurity that even if he can't perform, it's not like she knows better.
I think the issue is about the relative age and maturity level of the males in this thread. Not an insult, everyone has to grow up and this often takes into the mid-late 20's to do.brownstudies said:
I'm 37 now (old guy here), and I remember back to when I was a teenager or someone in my early 20's and I'm always amused by how much different I was back then, compared to where I am now.
Your above statements are pretty wise.
So for an old gamers perspective here, fellas.. Read the above and understand it. It's 100% accurate.
Oh and I smoked in elementary school but hated it and quit early on.
Got drunk for the first time at 17
Had sex for the first time at 18 as an 'arrangement' with a friend because we both didn't want to be virgins anymore and thought we were missing out on something special (hint.. we weren't)