First, I'm sorry you have to be faced with this Grammar Nazism. But if you're one of those people who really doesn't care if your grammar is correct, this thread isn't for you. Some people get defensive about it, and this is supposed to be a constructive thread. Some people actually make honest mistakes and might appreciate some reminders.
Plus, correct grammar makes this site look better. When your post looks like "dis wit no effort atall put in to what it look's like and no punctuaton and it jsut runs on", nobody wants to read that. I'm sure the people who write like that don't care what other people think of them, but it's like hearing someone talk with a really heavy drawl and no coherency like they've never been to school and never read a book. Okay, maybe that's a bit of an exaggeration, but the point still stands. Some people automatically turn their attention off when they see writing like that, and it can make you look like you don't care. If you don't care, nobody else will.
And one thing I always say, if you have the time to look through a thread and make a post, you have the time to hit the Shift key or stick a period in there. Maybe even a few commas if you're feeling generous. Anyway, I'll cut the flame bait short and get to some rules that are being forgotten or misused.
This is aimed at the people who would be genuinely interested in improving the quality of their posts and the forums.
NOTE: I know punctuation is supposed to go inside quotation marks, but I'm taking some liberties to keep it as readable as possible. My reasons are explained in detail later.
Apostrophes:
God, apostrophes. A simple way to look at it is this-
Is the word possessive, as in "the cat(')s" or "the rock(')s"?
-If yes, put an apostrophe. One thing people mix up a lot, "it's/its". The ONLY time you use an apostrophe is in a contraction for "it is", it's. If you're saying something like "it(')s color is green", you don't put one. That would be like saying "hi's" or "her's".
-If no-
Is the word a contraction, as in "can't" or "you've"?
-If yes, put an apostrophe. Also, make sure it goes where letters are taken out. "Can't" is short for "can not", so when you take out the "no", you replace it with an apostrophe.
-If no, it doesn't need an apostrophe.
And that's it. No need to over-think it. Only on possessives (remembering the "it's/its" rule) and contractions. Never on plural nouns. So no "I have seven dog's at home".
Also, when you're making a plural noun (dogs) possessive, an apostrophe goes on the very end (dogs').
One thing that bugs me is words like "ninja'd". I honestly have no idea what to do with that shit. It's not an actual word and I don't think there are any similar examples, but it seems like it should just be "ninjad", but because it isn't a real word that doesn't seem right. Maybe someone knows. 'Cause I don't.
Homophones:
This [http://learnyourdamnhomophones.com/] is a good, if slightly frank guide on homophones. A few highlights-
"Loose" and "lose". If you're losing a game, it's one "o". If your shoelace is loose, it's two. You could use a stupid "if you lose, lose an 'o'" sort of thing, but I won't do that to you here.
"Your" and "you're". "You're" is a contraction for "you are". "Your" is possessive. Just remember that.
"Than" and "then". "Than" is comparative, "then" is not.
"Their/they're/there". "There" is a location. "It's over there". "They're" is a contraction for "they are". "Their" is possessive. If you just remember two, you'll get the other one.
"Too" and "to". "Too" is a synonym for "exceedingly" and "also". "To" is a preposition, as in "I went to the store". Also, I really shouldn't have to say this, but "two" is a number.
Could of/Would of:
*Facepalm. This is one of those things that accidentally spread around by example, and it needs to be stopped. The correct phrases are "could have" and "would have".
So take "I have been to Ireland". Just like it, you would say "I could have gone to Ireland". Not "I could of gone to Ireland", because that would be like saying "I of been to Ireland". I assume they started because of "could've" and "would've", which when spoken sound like they have "of" instead of "have".
Le Punctuation:
With this, it comes down to either laziness from the writer or nitpicking from me. Some people don't use punctuation at all. You paid for an entire keyboard, might as well use what you have. But some people don't use it enough or correctly. Actually, I used it incorrectly just now, but that's because I write to reflect speech because I'm strange like that. This is actually a good time to explain a couple things, since the people who got this far in the thread might be the ones who care. I'm not saying everyone should write flawlessly like professional authors, but most of the mistakes I've brought up are actual, technical mistakes. What I go by is "casual but correct". I let myself write fragmented sentences. Like this. But only for emphasis. I don't, however, let myself leave out a comma where there should be one like right after the "one" in this sentence. Mistakes like saying "they're table is big" are not correct or casual, just wrong. Also, thank you if you've read this far. I can't wait to see how many people call me out on things that are explained in this paragraph.
Anyway, punctuation. Again, this is more nitpicky, but for the basics-
-Periods at the end of a sentence (I mean it's one extra key press, it's really not that hard).
-Commas between major parts of sentences, as in this one. If it sounds like it's running on for a long time find a place where a comma would help the flow and that's probably correct. Like in that sentence, there should be commas after "time" and arguably "flow", but I won't get into that.
-Semicolons between parts of the same sentence that are more separate. I like chicken, it tastes like chicken. That's incorrect. Obviously there should be a semicolon instead of a comma. They're basically two different sentences that are still directly related. "I like chicken. It tastes like chicken." sounds broken up, but the previous example doesn't look right either, so you go right in between with a semicolon.
One more thing:
Please don't color your entire posts. It hurts some people's eyes. We know you want to be unique, but it's really unnecessary.
I think that's enough for now. If there's not too much flaming in this thread about me being elitist or whatever the hell, I might make another one for the people who actually care.
And if you don't care, there are plenty other threads that might interest you. Nobody forced you to read this. Remember that before posting if you're planning on criticizing.
Plus, correct grammar makes this site look better. When your post looks like "dis wit no effort atall put in to what it look's like and no punctuaton and it jsut runs on", nobody wants to read that. I'm sure the people who write like that don't care what other people think of them, but it's like hearing someone talk with a really heavy drawl and no coherency like they've never been to school and never read a book. Okay, maybe that's a bit of an exaggeration, but the point still stands. Some people automatically turn their attention off when they see writing like that, and it can make you look like you don't care. If you don't care, nobody else will.
And one thing I always say, if you have the time to look through a thread and make a post, you have the time to hit the Shift key or stick a period in there. Maybe even a few commas if you're feeling generous. Anyway, I'll cut the flame bait short and get to some rules that are being forgotten or misused.
This is aimed at the people who would be genuinely interested in improving the quality of their posts and the forums.
NOTE: I know punctuation is supposed to go inside quotation marks, but I'm taking some liberties to keep it as readable as possible. My reasons are explained in detail later.
Apostrophes:
God, apostrophes. A simple way to look at it is this-
Is the word possessive, as in "the cat(')s" or "the rock(')s"?
-If yes, put an apostrophe. One thing people mix up a lot, "it's/its". The ONLY time you use an apostrophe is in a contraction for "it is", it's. If you're saying something like "it(')s color is green", you don't put one. That would be like saying "hi's" or "her's".
-If no-
Is the word a contraction, as in "can't" or "you've"?
-If yes, put an apostrophe. Also, make sure it goes where letters are taken out. "Can't" is short for "can not", so when you take out the "no", you replace it with an apostrophe.
-If no, it doesn't need an apostrophe.
And that's it. No need to over-think it. Only on possessives (remembering the "it's/its" rule) and contractions. Never on plural nouns. So no "I have seven dog's at home".
Also, when you're making a plural noun (dogs) possessive, an apostrophe goes on the very end (dogs').
One thing that bugs me is words like "ninja'd". I honestly have no idea what to do with that shit. It's not an actual word and I don't think there are any similar examples, but it seems like it should just be "ninjad", but because it isn't a real word that doesn't seem right. Maybe someone knows. 'Cause I don't.
Homophones:
This [http://learnyourdamnhomophones.com/] is a good, if slightly frank guide on homophones. A few highlights-
"Loose" and "lose". If you're losing a game, it's one "o". If your shoelace is loose, it's two. You could use a stupid "if you lose, lose an 'o'" sort of thing, but I won't do that to you here.
"Your" and "you're". "You're" is a contraction for "you are". "Your" is possessive. Just remember that.
"Than" and "then". "Than" is comparative, "then" is not.
"Their/they're/there". "There" is a location. "It's over there". "They're" is a contraction for "they are". "Their" is possessive. If you just remember two, you'll get the other one.
"Too" and "to". "Too" is a synonym for "exceedingly" and "also". "To" is a preposition, as in "I went to the store". Also, I really shouldn't have to say this, but "two" is a number.
Could of/Would of:
*Facepalm. This is one of those things that accidentally spread around by example, and it needs to be stopped. The correct phrases are "could have" and "would have".
So take "I have been to Ireland". Just like it, you would say "I could have gone to Ireland". Not "I could of gone to Ireland", because that would be like saying "I of been to Ireland". I assume they started because of "could've" and "would've", which when spoken sound like they have "of" instead of "have".
Le Punctuation:
With this, it comes down to either laziness from the writer or nitpicking from me. Some people don't use punctuation at all. You paid for an entire keyboard, might as well use what you have. But some people don't use it enough or correctly. Actually, I used it incorrectly just now, but that's because I write to reflect speech because I'm strange like that. This is actually a good time to explain a couple things, since the people who got this far in the thread might be the ones who care. I'm not saying everyone should write flawlessly like professional authors, but most of the mistakes I've brought up are actual, technical mistakes. What I go by is "casual but correct". I let myself write fragmented sentences. Like this. But only for emphasis. I don't, however, let myself leave out a comma where there should be one like right after the "one" in this sentence. Mistakes like saying "they're table is big" are not correct or casual, just wrong. Also, thank you if you've read this far. I can't wait to see how many people call me out on things that are explained in this paragraph.
Anyway, punctuation. Again, this is more nitpicky, but for the basics-
-Periods at the end of a sentence (I mean it's one extra key press, it's really not that hard).
-Commas between major parts of sentences, as in this one. If it sounds like it's running on for a long time find a place where a comma would help the flow and that's probably correct. Like in that sentence, there should be commas after "time" and arguably "flow", but I won't get into that.
-Semicolons between parts of the same sentence that are more separate. I like chicken, it tastes like chicken. That's incorrect. Obviously there should be a semicolon instead of a comma. They're basically two different sentences that are still directly related. "I like chicken. It tastes like chicken." sounds broken up, but the previous example doesn't look right either, so you go right in between with a semicolon.
One more thing:
Please don't color your entire posts. It hurts some people's eyes. We know you want to be unique, but it's really unnecessary.
I think that's enough for now. If there's not too much flaming in this thread about me being elitist or whatever the hell, I might make another one for the people who actually care.
And if you don't care, there are plenty other threads that might interest you. Nobody forced you to read this. Remember that before posting if you're planning on criticizing.
