Mall Fight RP: (CLOSED) (FINISHED)

[Saltarius]

"Yeah, hi. See, the guy who just handed you this phone is actually an intergalactic criminal we've been harboring so we could bank on his bounty, but just to appease you, we'll let you take him instead. He goes by..."

I quickly think of the worst action movie character name I can think of.

"Jack Knife. Mainly by Knife."

 

[MinimanZombie]

The pirate shoots a bolt of electricity into the pool.
"Hmm...How about, I kill all of you except for Jake Knight or whatever you said, and cash in on his bounty! It's a win-win!"

 

[Saltarius]

"See, thing is, my buddy Trilby here is the son of an galactic ambassador. Kill him, and you've got a whole planet on your ass from nebula to nebula."

 

[MinimanZombie]

He then freezes the pool.
"Yeah, how about no. I've got enough ADAM in me to fill up a lake or something. No one is gonna mess with me, even if I do kill some guy with minor fame."

 

[ShindoL Shill]

I punch Salt in the face, then grab his phone as he falls to the ground.
"Trilby here. Listen, those two things that my buddy just told you are the exact opposite of the truth. Knife is one of the cops I told you about, and I'm an interplanetary drug dealer-slash-Choose Your Own Adventure book writer."

 

[MinimanZombie]

He melts the ice.
"So, no repercussions for killing you? Honestly this just gets better and better."

 

[Saltarius]

"I WAS TRYING TO SAVE AT LEAST A FEW OF OUR ASSES!"

 

[Captain Anon]

i smoke a cigartte "oh god another assassin"

 

[ShindoL Shill]

"Well, killing me would deprive the universe of entertaining gamebooks AND my special cocktail of drugs. But, other than that, no repercussions. Anyway, I'm going to give Salt the phone back."
I drop the phone on Salt, then walk off to find a teleporter.

 

[MinimanZombie]

"Well, if you all died permanently, that would be great. And then if you gave me your ship, that would be just wonderful. Oh, and a free bagel. And then, I guess I could leave you assholes alone."

 

[Saltarius]

"Alright, simply put buddy, no. There is no scenario, in any possible alternate universe, let alone this one, where you win. We've dealt with tougher than you. We fought a fucking space god. We killed a demon. There is nothing you bring to the table we haven't seen before. So don't even think you can intimidate us."

 

[ShindoL Shill]

I locate a teleporter, and use it to go onto the pirate ship.
"Well, someone had fun..." I say, looking down at the corpses.
I start walking through the ship, picking up anything that looks vaguely valuable. I start planting various explosives around the ship, then position it so that it's clearly visible from the swimming pool area. I teleport back onto our ship.

 

[Paddy the Second]

A tulpa walks across the surface of the pool and punches the pirate in the face.

 

[MinimanZombie]

The pirate barely flinches.
"You really want to fight me?"

 

[Paddy the Second]

"I'm game yes." He takes a step back, roundhousing the pirate with a bootknife. You know. The ones Grim made a million pages ago.

 

[MinimanZombie]

The knife scrapes against his now near solid skin. He then blasts the tulpa with electricity.
"Can I go now?"

 

[ShindoL Shill]

I detonate the explosives on the pirate ship, blowing holes in the hull and igniting the fuel.
"You're free to leave. Exits are here and here." I say, pointing at the airlocks.

 

[MinimanZombie]

He spots the faint explosion.
"Well done, you managed to destroy the ship that had no engine parts and no crew, making it worthless. I applaud you."
He covers the workshop in ice.

 

[Captain Anon]

as I'm on the second floor I step back from a few feet before summoning my new sword "Black Mark't" I say as it appears slowly in my hand

I then run up, step up and jump off the railing "no" before I slash downwards

 

[MinimanZombie]

The sword clashes harmlessly off of his skin. He yawns and just walks off.
"Okay then. I'm just gonna find an escape pod or something and leave.