Mall Fight RP: (CLOSED) (FINISHED)
- Thread starter RaNDM G
- Start date
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I sit atop a large podium, donning a traditional British Judge uniform, wig and all. I then pull out a gavel.
"Order, order in the court! We are gathered here today, to witness the trial and judgement of one named Saltarius Crane, and her Accomplice, WafflesAndBacon. Court is now in session."
"Defendants, how do you plead?"
"Order, order in the court! We are gathered here today, to witness the trial and judgement of one named Saltarius Crane, and her Accomplice, WafflesAndBacon. Court is now in session."
"Defendants, how do you plead?"
"Objection! Defendants dont get to plead shit this aint some pussy-ass courtroom!"
I adjust my wig
I adjust my wig
"Your Honour my clients have not been told the charges they are facing, so how can they plea?"
"-ahem- Saltarius Crane and Wafflesandbacon, you are hereby charged with the following crimes against humanity and civilization: 1,250 counts of drug abuse violations, 30,000 counts of driving while intoxicated, 50,670 counts of burglary, 80,000 counts of arson, 400,000 counts of assault and battery; 200,00 of which i move to increased to charges of manslaughter, 300 counts of disorderly conduct, 6,789 counts of vandalism, 567,843 counts of credit fraud, 600,700 counts of identity fraud, terrorism, conspiracy to commit terrorism, mass murder, abduction, abduction of a child, cannibalism, 789,900,567 counts of homicide, genocide, conspiracy to commit genocide, 789,000 counts of money laundering, 764,978 counts of counterfeiting, 188,191 counts of weapons law violation, ruining Queen, conspiracy to ruin Queen, desecrating JFK, conspiracy to desecrate JFK, Unsanctioned dating simulation."
"[small]God damn it Paddy.[/small] He's right, you're going to need to provide evidence."
I look at Trilby.
"Come on, you can't reach a verdict this early. That's cheating. And boring."
I look at Trilby.
"Come on, you can't reach a verdict this early. That's cheating. And boring."
"Your honor, Jury, I have but one question. Can you honestly looks these two criminals in the eye and tell me theyre not guilty?"