Final Fantasy 7.
No exceptions. Ever.
Ten years of forums have taught me this.
Post contains spoilers
Have you EVER spent ONE day online without having at least 20 people taking the fanboyism, concentrating it into phallic shapes, and trying to violate you in ways that not even your spouse violates you with them? Their life mission is to "enlighten the masses" and there's no possible way I could possibly dislike it so clearly I've never even played it, right? Wrong! Hell, I regret to admit I actually OWN a digital PSN copy when I mistakenly spent some time offline and decided to give it another chance.
It is, hands down, the worst FF game ever made, and the FF series as a whole is largely just average anyways! So, what's so bad about it? Let's begin.
The game opens with a spiky haired jerk taking less damage from an attack called "Machine Gun" than he does from a normal kick. He twirls his 5 foot logn slab of iron around in one hand, too. So then a black guy with a guy with a gun (how stereotype-dodging original /sarcasm) for an arm (how the hell does he load the ammo?) whose attack strength nis modified by strength joins. Yes. Guns modified by strength. KILL IT WITH FIRE.
Anyways, "Cloud" as the spiky haired jerk is known is overpowered as it becomed quickly apparent. Even with magic materia (lowers his HP and strength) equipped, he still ha more HP and attack than ANYONE ELSE IN THE CAST. Even without any Magic materia (increases magic and MP) he's ALMOST the best mage in the cast. By the endgame, he's hitting 5-7k damage while no one else can break 1.5-2k damage. He's severely unbalanced to the point of utter morinity. "Oh, just remove him from your party!" Yeah, problem. FF7 has the stupid flaw of not allowing him to be removed from the party, much like how FF8 couldn't see Squall removed. It's a terrible flaw because what if you don't even like them?
And as for Cloud as a person? He "had the physical build" he needed for a military group (called "SOLDIER" in all caps for NO APPARENT REASON) but lacked the mental strength. While this has the POTENTIAL to lead to a deep and immersive character, he falls more flat than his attempts to not get conveniently mind controlled by his nemesis (which conveniently is really only used to screw the party over once, when they could have all been killed in their sleep. Sephiroth is an utter failure of a villain in every way, shape, and form.) The rest of the cast? Get like 5 minutes in the spot light and that's it. They focus on the single worst character in every way, shape, and form.
And the fans just don;'t care, as made apparent by the two "love interests." Tifa is a slightly shy girl who's known Cloud since childhood. Her personality is somewhat girly and even innocent, with one exception being to infiltrate a brothel to get information (nothing happens.) On the flip side, "Aeris" whose real name is apparently "Aerith" and who has sparked fights worldwide, is bluntly forward and honest.The difference is how they dress. As a martial artist, Tifa wears a sleeveless shirt that shows her bellybutton, and shorts. Aerith wears a long dress. Because of this, fans clain Tifa to be the "slut" of the two. What? That's right, folks, the game is so bad, fans have to do this to derrive any enjoyment, and they're so blind, they don't care.
To give you an example of how badly designed this game is, let me use an early game example. The "Materia" command is locked until returning to the slums after the start of the game. Cloud has 2 spells, Barret has 0. Cloud only needs 1 and his physical attacks are stronger than Barret's. Finally, it gives you a heal materia right before the first boss AND YOU'RE NOT EVEN ALLOWED TO USE IT. That;s right. You cannot use a healing spell a game gives you right before a boss while you fight that boss, simply due to the fact that the menu category for it is still locked.
Honestly, the whole thing degrades into "omg big swords cloud and sephiroth fangasm" and quite frankly, I blame this for SO MUCH. Too many games have absolutely nothing outside of hype and flash, and FF7 was the game to start that trend ofm failure.
If you're a Final fantasy 7 fan, fine. Hell, maybe we could even get along. But for the love of god, learn to contain your fangasm ssince quite honestly, your game is the worst RPG I've ever played, and I've played over 100 of them!
