My funny encounter with the police

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Wickatricka

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Aug 26, 2011
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Okay so I was staying with my sister in her dingy little cabin out in the middle of bum fuck Egypt that only had like 2 houses next to it (one being another cabin and the other being the landlords house) I was just sitting around watching movies on her T.v. and smoking a quarter of weed that I picked up earlier that day. Now my sister was a stripper who worked nights so I was there by myself at the time and I went to let her dogs out and how I was standing out there the door closed and I got locked out. So I walked all around the outside of the house looking for a unlocked window but no luck. So I decided well the window on the front of the house looked pretty cheap and thin so I punched out one of the glass panels so I could unlock it.

I got a couple cuts on my hand no big deal. So I unlocked it and started trying to wedge it open because there was a bunch of crap on the other side of it and I got it like 1/4 of the way open and I thought I could climb through. Little did I know I couldn't so as I was trying to squeeze through this opening two Michigan state troopers pulled in the drive way right as I was almost in (The neighbor must of heard all the noise I was making and called it in). Both of them quickly jump out of there cars and start telling me to stop so I did. I got out of the window and started talking to them, telling them that I was my sisters little brother and I just got locked out. Surprisingly they were pretty cool about it, all they did was call my sisters work to confirm that I was in fact her little brother. Once all that happened they proceed to give me a boost through the window how all this stale weed smoke was floating out of the window into their face. They didn't say a word about it, they just told me to have a good night and they were on their way. Of course I waited until they left to call the dogs in. Pretty funny I thought defiantly one of the more bizarre police encounters I've had (I have plenty of stories on that subject unfortunately)

So you guys got any good police encounter stories? what did you think of my little ordeal lol?
 

Aris Khandr

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My only really memorable encounter with the police was when I went to the movies in a patrol car in middle school. I had made plans to see a movie with friends, and my brother got himself arrested that night. Ten minutes before we were supposed to leave to drop me off, they bring him home. This, naturally, upset me, as I very rarely went out. One of the police officers was super cool, and asked my mother if she could just give me a ride to the theater.

That's the best I've got, because I don't really interact with the police much.
 

DugMachine

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Apr 5, 2010
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I thought you were serious about living in Egypt then I saw the the Michigan state troopers. wat.

Uh I think I was 17 and I had just started getting into smoking weed and I got pulled over for an out of date registration sticker. Funny thing is I had no sort of tolerance to weed yet so I didn't hide it well at all. How the cop didn't pull my ass out and check for the dimebag I had in the glove department idk, he must have took pity on me or something. Now I don't drive ever if i'm under the influence cause it scared the hell out of me.

And driving home one night I was alone on the road with one state trooper. The speed limit was 60 but he was driving maybe 40 or something. So I should have passed him and would not have broken any laws but... idk something told me to not pass the cop so I just stayed right behind him driving 40 all the way home. I think he was screwing with me.
 

StylinBones

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Mar 3, 2012
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1. What were Michigan state troopers doing in Egypt??

2. Have you ever seen your sister's act? If yes, elaborate.

3. Here's my encounter:
>friend and i driving on highway
>get profiled and pulled over by narc cop (Tahoe w/ K9)
>split eighth of weed and each eat a half eighth
>have weed stuck in teeth
>cop asks what was in bag on the floor
>I say "a sandwich"
>he says he can see it in my teeth.
>get outta the car
>handcuffed and sat on the ground
>cop puts dog in car
>drugs in bellies, turning into poop, illegal drug poop
>had to let us go
>fuck yeah.
>go get more weed to calm us down

I hope I don't get banned for this story....
 

Kae

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Wait Egypt, Michigan?
What the hell are you talking about?
According to google it is possible that you are living on a country club, either that or you're probably still high and made a mistake, though I guess there could be another Egypt in Michigan...

Anyway, I've got no interesting ones, the only time I've been busted was because I was out at night on the park playing Castlevania Dawn of Sorrow on my friend's DS, and since I'm tall and have a scar on my left eye they assumed I was a mugger, but I just explained to them that I couldn't sleep so I decided to gout to the park to stare at the moon, and level up a little in the game while I was at it, and after I showed them my house which was fairly nearby and that I indeed have a key they apologized and said good night and that was that, as I said there isn't much to it.
 

urza4315

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Sep 7, 2012
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I was with my friends once, and they were messing around with some of the wet concrete on the sidewalk (I stayed out of it). Undercover cop pulls up and pulls out his badge, takes down names. No idea what happened to my friends afterwards.

Moral of the story - don't mess with wet concrete, this is serious shit.
 

bigfatcarp93

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Mar 26, 2012
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Aris Khandr said:


My only really memorable encounter with the police was when I went to the movies in a patrol car in middle school. I had made plans to see a movie with friends, and my brother got himself arrested that night. Ten minutes before we were supposed to leave to drop me off, they bring him home. This, naturally, upset me, as I very rarely went out. One of the police officers was super cool, and asked my mother if she could just give me a ride to the theater.

That's the best I've got, because I don't really interact with the police much.
Dude, I'm sorry, this is totally off-topic, but after readin OP's whole story, scrolling down to that pic made me almost die with laughter. Kudos, bro.

As for me, there was the time that this dude attacked me, so my dad, a couple cops and I spent the next three hours chasing him around the nighttime streets of Forest Grove. Not nearly as awesome as it sounds; more exhausting.
 

Sacman

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last encounter I had with the police they immediately asked for a green card, despite the fact that I'm a citizen, kept throwing racial slurs at me and than took my mcdonald's and favorite bag and drove off... :D
 

Sandjube

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Feb 11, 2011
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Everyone seems really confused about the whole Egypt thing. "Bumfuck eqypt" doesn't literally mean Egypt, it just means like, a shithole/middle of nowhere type place, if I remember correctly.
 

chiggerwood

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May 10, 2009
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DugMachine said:
StylinBones said:
snip again
Kaleion said:
and final snip
"Bum Fuck Egypt" means in the middle of nowhere, or in a sparsely populated area. See also: "On the corner of bum fuck and you got a perty mouth." "ass end of nowhere" and "Boofoo Egypt"

OT: I don't have any funny cop stories. All the stories involving cops in my life are really, really awful tales.
 

Zack Alklazaris

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My friends and I were making a movie that involved a kidnapping. We had a guy in his pajamas with rope tying his hands behind his back being escorted outside his house with fake uzies. Well, we never really warned the neighbors and apparently one of the more nosey ones called the cops.

We had 5 cop cars surround us guns drawn telling us to put down the weapons and get down on ground. Haven't been quite as scared as I was that day. After everything was sorted out they let us go and recommended we tell the surrounding neighbors as well as have a sign to make sure everyone knows its just a movie.
 

Evil Smurf

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Nov 11, 2011
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StylinBones said:
1. What were Michigan state troopers doing in Egypt??

2. Have you ever seen your sister's act? If yes, elaborate.

3. Here's my encounter:
>friend and i driving on highway
>get profiled and pulled over by narc cop (Tahoe w/ K9)
>split eighth of weed and each eat a half eighth
>have weed stuck in teeth
>cop asks what was in bag on the floor
>I say "a sandwich"
>he says he can see it in my teeth.
>get outta the car
>handcuffed and sat on the ground
>cop puts dog in car
>drugs in bellies, turning into poop, illegal drug poop
>had to let us go
>fuck yeah.
>go get more weed to calm us down

I hope I don't get banned for this story....

If you do then just mention that weed is leag in some states of America, since this forum follows the American laws http://medicalmarijuana.procon.org/view.resource.php?resourceID=000881
 

Fasckira

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Oct 22, 2009
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Wickatricka said:
TL;DR version for people who cant be arsed reading this:

Wickatricka said:
I got locked out of my sister's place while I was stoned. Police saw me trying to break back in. Checked I was allowed to be there. Nothing happened.
You're welcome. :p

Not really had any funny encounters with the police. I guess the closest would be when I was speeding one night coming back from Scotland - pitch dark, no other cars around at all so I was pushing my car pretty hard and 3am in the morning.
Suddenly I notice blue flashing lights in my rear mirror and immediately experience that ball-shrinking moment of panic. I realised that its probably unlikely they've got a speed reading on me in the dark and that if I applied the brakes then the brake lights would light up so I start dropping the gears to slow the car down enough.... police flew right past me. Turns out a few miles down the road a caravan had tipped over (no one hurt from what I could see) but I drove bang on the speed limit for the rest of that journey.
 

Quaxar

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Sep 21, 2009
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Does conspiring to commit arsony count?

It was at the biggest and therefor worst club for teenagers, it was the third or fourth time they had been there that night for a drunk brawl, our ambulance was only there for the first time, one of the policemen said "hey, how about we just burn it down" and it kind of went from there.
Nobody actually started pouring petrol, just so you know.
 

DugMachine

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Apr 5, 2010
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chiggerwood said:
"Bum Fuck Egypt" means in the middle of nowhere, or in a sparsely populated area. See also: "On the corner of bum fuck and you got a perty mouth." "ass end of nowhere" and "Boofoo Egypt"

OT: I don't have any funny cop stories. All the stories involving cops in my life are really, really awful tales.
I usually just say bum fuck Texas can I live in a random ass area waaaaaaay south like 5 minutes away from Mexico basically.
 

Guffe

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Jul 12, 2009
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Not really....
I am in the police academy now so I think I'll have a few stories in about 5-6 years.
 

piinyouri

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Mar 18, 2012
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Was driving through the nearest somewhat big city.

Cop pulls me over.
I give'em my paper work, and the usual waiting begins.

He comes back, hands my license back to me, makes a hurried face, then blurts out "You need to get this windshield fixed" (My front windshield is cracked) then drives off.



Come to find out, the cops where looking for someone specific, and my boyfriend who was riding in the car at the time was wearing the same type of hat.
He had to make up a reason to pull me over.