I was gonna say, my Egyptian friend said the police are worse than the criminals, I doubt many stories about them are funny in the usual sense of the word.Res Plus said:I think it would be less strange if you have a natural grasp of American slang, "bum fuck Egypt" caused me some issues. I thought it was going to be a mad tale of hijinks with Egyptian law enforcement. They do not piss about in Egypt. If they catch you with weed you had better have some bribe money handy. Still an amusing anecdote mind.Slayer_2 said:I read this after drinking copious amounts of alcohol at the club, and I am so confused. Can't tell if it's just me or if your story is just that weird.
deathninja said:Pharmaceutical chemist, but I specialise in crystallography now. The day I start losing my hair is the day Leicester starts getting quality methTotal LOLige said:Drug kingpin? Or Pharmacologist, you're halfway to becoming Walter White.![]()
Must remember to use that when i next go to rob a bank.Zack Alklazaris said:My friends and I were making a movie that involved a kidnapping. We had a guy in his pajamas with rope tying his hands behind his back being escorted outside his house with fake uzies. Well, we never really warned the neighbors and apparently one of the more nosey ones called the cops.
We had 5 cop cars surround us guns drawn telling us to put down the weapons and get down on ground. Haven't been quite as scared as I was that day. After everything was sorted out they let us go and recommended we tell the surrounding neighbors as well as have a sign to make sure everyone knows its just a movie.
'Protocol' is fucking retarded, then, with no regard towards the safety of anyone. Isn't it pretty common knowledge, at least you would think for anyone dealing with potential bombs, that innocent men have been kidnapped and forced to wear bomb vests before?gyroscopeboy said:My friend told me that its PROTOCOL IN BOMB SITUATIONS TO SHOOT IN THE HEAD FIRST, ASK QUESTIONS LATER.
Luckiest guy ever.
I started smelling LSD the moment those Michigan troopers came to Egypt.Wolverine18 said:I'm guessing the OP is still stoned.
Kudos for telling a joke nobody got, bro.Radoh said:Well, there was this one time where after killing a State Senator for sleeping with my wife, the police officer hauling me off to jail and I got started talking.
Now he wasn't really paying much attention to the road, so he hadn't seen the jaywalking pedestrian right up until after the crash.
I woke up several days later in the middle of a zombie apocalypse, real crazy stuff, man.
I don't know, you seem to know it's a joke, implying you got the reference. Otherwise all it takes is someone who played The Walking Dead to figure it out.Spector29 said:Kudos for telling a joke nobody got, bro.Radoh said:Well, there was this one time where after killing a State Senator for sleeping with my wife, the police officer hauling me off to jail and I got started talking.
Now he wasn't really paying much attention to the road, so he hadn't seen the jaywalking pedestrian right up until after the crash.
I woke up several days later in the middle of a zombie apocalypse, real crazy stuff, man.
HEYDugMachine said:I usually just say bum fuck Texas can I live in a random ass area waaaaaaay south like 5 minutes away from Mexico basically.chiggerwood said:"Bum Fuck Egypt" means in the middle of nowhere, or in a sparsely populated area. See also: "On the corner of bum fuck and you got a perty mouth." "ass end of nowhere" and "Boofoo Egypt"
OT: I don't have any funny cop stories. All the stories involving cops in my life are really, really awful tales.
Zykon TheLich" post="18.387499.15486426 said:Several other incidents of getting booted out at the end of raves or squat parties or not getting picked up for carrying various pharmaceuticals but they were pretty much run of the mill.
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This brought back some hazy memories. I remember doing this sort of thing regularly, stepping out of a squat or rave at 8the next morning, sunlight glaring into saucer eyes, grin disguised by an atrosious gurn only to see a dozen police cars lined up along the road and having to walk past all of them, clearly off my nut with a serious collection of pharmacuticals i hadn't gotten to burning a hole in pocket. Nothing ever happened, they were more concerned about breaking up the party, but I'll never forget how surreal it was to walk out into daylight (no idea what the time was) and have to walk past a small army of police cars.
Funniest was probably when a cop threatened to arrest me for peeing in a park on my way home on new years. Went from him being a right git to insisting they could take DNA from my urine (which I suggested he do) to him nervously admitting he had no grounds to stop me and letting me go (he hadn't actually seen me peeing up the tree just walking away from it doing up my belt). I'll never forget the look on his face when I suggested how grateful his crime scene colleagues would be if he called them out to swab some pee from the base of a tree.