My girlfriend and her crappy video games

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God's Clown

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Make her play Star Ocean: Till the end of time, or any of the several GOOD final fantasy games(4,5,6,7,8,10) or even persona 3 or 4. If you go the star ocean route, I'd avoid Star Ocean 2, specially if voice acting annoys the hell out of you, cause its horrible, like seriously.
 

Cheesus333

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Aug 20, 2008
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Jesus Christ, bigotry much!? Have none of you considered that maybe she has an individual taste and that's none of your fucking right to decide? No? Well perhaps you should. Respect her choice, whether you like it or not. Bitching about it will get you nowhere.
 

Goldeneye103X2

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Decoy Doctorpus said:
This has been bugging me for a while.

I own quite a few current gen games, about 80 at the last count, lots of these games are good. In fact I'd say with a few exceptions which I'll put down to personal taste they're all good. It's a nice mix of Triple A 9/10 Mainstream blockbusters and cult hits. Shadow of the Collosus is there, GTA4 is there, Valkyria Chronicles, Psychonauts, Ratchet and Clank etc etc.
You have valkyria chronicles? wow. Someone actually knows it exists. Well done. Well done indeed.
 

Combined

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Decoy Doctorpus said:
I spend every day sitting on a pile of awesome games any game fan would murder for and she's playing through a generic pile of shit... in Japanese. Now I'm going to kill myself.
How very interesting. And perhaps you can give your address, so I might come and steal said pile of games drink some tea.

Other than that... Well, I've known a girl like that. It's nothing too big if you can ignore it. "To each their own" is a phrase that springs to mind. But if it really really really gets on your nerves, combinise her and everything will be okay. Except she might beat you with her stunstick for a few... lifetimes afterwards.
 

vid20

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Feb 12, 2008
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Decoy Doctorpus said:
The greatest voice track ever committed to record (emphasis on committed) [http://ca.youtube.com/watch?v=jyNjSAv_OuY&feature=related]
Oh man.. I am still laughing form this... "I... I can't read more then two." "More then two lines of dialogue." "I can't do more then it in one go."
"Why are we here?"
"I HAD A DREAM."
"But, we know everything back here."
"I HAD A DREAM."
"Dude, you are crazy."
"I HAD A DREAM!"

best defense of a stand point ever.. oh man.. gold. I think this is the first thing i have laughed that hard, long, and loud at in ages.

Back on topic: Each to there own; I mean if she enjoys it.. and it doesn't hurt you (Like, shes now forcing you to play them is she?) Then is it really that much of a problem?
 

Bullfrog1983

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Decoy Doctorpus said:
This has been bugging me for a while.

I own quite a few current gen games, about 80 at the last count, lots of these games are good. In fact I'd say with a few exceptions which I'll put down to personal taste they're all good. It's a nice mix of Triple A 9/10 Mainstream blockbusters and cult hits. Shadow of the Collosus is there, GTA4 is there, Valkyria Chronicles, Psychonauts, Ratchet and Clank etc etc.

I have a wonderful selection of games that I'd just love to share with my girlfriend. But I can't. Why? Because my girlfriend loves shitty games. I don't just mean she likes one game that I think is shitty. I mean she likes games that are shitty. No matter how shoddy a game is, no matter how derivative, no matter how much the voice acting makes me want to die she will play it, she will unlock every secret and she will add it to her fucking compendium of shitty games.

At first I thought it was a genre thing you know? Like she really likes JRPG's and she's willing to play anything in the genre. But the thing is her response when asked how good a game is will always be the same no matter which fucking game she's playing. Oh so you're playing Ephemeral Fantasia [http://ps2.ign.com/articles/163/163594p1.html] are you? How is it? Oh it's good is it? Is it really! No it fucking isn't! You are a monster wrapped in human skin!

Erin's addiction to pure shit has been eating away at me for years but today... today it's reached the boiling point. She brought home a copy of Chaos Wars. Chaos fucking Wars. I don't even think they 'made' this game per-se. I think they actually just pasted in code from every other turn based strategy JRPG. The game is, naturally, fucking atrocious but it did have one thing going for it, one tiny little golden nugget in a giant pile of shit. The voice acting. The voice acting in Chaos Wars is so bad it actually transcends shitty, like a planet reaching one end of the universe only to appear at the other.


The greatest voice track ever committed to record (emphasis on committed) [http://ca.youtube.com/watch?v=jyNjSAv_OuY&feature=related]

I was overjoyed. Sure the music sounds like something you'd hear in an elevator in Hell but the voices... the voices could keep me going. It'd be something to laugh at. But no. Because she wants to "Appreciate the story" (ugh) she's playing the game in fucking Japanese. I spend every day sitting on a pile of awesome games any game fan would murder for and she's playing through a generic pile of shit... in Japanese. Now I'm going to kill myself.
So you like mainstream of everything with a good rating, except JRPGs and she has shitty taste... hmm. If I were you, I would recommend playing an RPG (not a JRPG) with her, so you can both enjoy it together since she does not appear to enjoy fast-paced action. I would recommend something like Baldur's Gate I & II for the PC (real time, but you can pause.) If you haven't played the game, it is a lot of fun - as long as you have 2 computers that were made in the last 10 years you should be able to run the game (so long as you get it set up right.)

Anything you can play co-operatively she will probably enjoy. Alternatively, you could try and play Valkyria Chronicles with her and explain to her it is turn based, and how to shoot/move/etc. She probably didn't want to play it because the game appeared to be a normal shoot-em-up which might be a bit difficult for her.

Other than that I would calm down before doing anything too drastic! ;)
 

ThaBenMan

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Mar 6, 2008
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I understand how your situation can be frustrating, but all I can really say is: just be glad you have a girlfriend. If you really love her, you'll put up with her shitty games.

It was an entertaining rant, anyway.

EDIT: Oh snap, I just saw the post from DD's girlfriend - busted
 

mattttherman3

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Dec 16, 2008
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Theres nothingt wrong with JRPG's not all anyway, the one your discussing is a bad one, and not all JRPGs are turn based, the Tales games are not turn based and therefore, they are the best JRPGs(Tales of Symphonia 2 EXCLUDED because they got rid of most of the original cast). Now then the turn based games get really really annoying after a while so I am taking a break from Lost Odyssey.
 

The Random One

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May 29, 2008
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Good sire, in your opening post you accidentally listed GTA4 amongst good games. I urge you correct this oversight at once.

(There's probably a morale to this post. I'll go over there and weep for my lack of girlfriend now.)
 

The Wooster

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Jul 15, 2008
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Bevvie said:
His "girlfriend's" real name isn't Erin --it just happens to be my middle name. Yes I am Decoy's GIRLFRIEND. And no I have never played the game Ephemeral Fantasia. I do happen to be playing Chaos Wars, plus I have played tons of other games too. At least I finish half the games I have played (good or bad) as most of my "boyfriend's" games just sit there and he skirts around from game to game (almost always shooters) not completing them, especially when they are too hard (No More Heroes anyone?).

I used to play Doom and Wolfenstein when I was younger however since a certain child was born I can't stand most shooters because they make me queasy, plus they can be just as generic as anything else. I've also played a ton of adventure/action games like DoTT and Legend of Zelda. I like adventure games and RPG's. I also like most puzzle games.

Really who cares what games I like. I like what I like, and you will like what you like. I play them for my own reasons and what anyone here says isn't going to change the fact I find RPG's relaxing. When I get stressed it is nice to be able to sit back in a fantasy setting to take the real hardships of life out of the equation (hence the certain semi-pornographic books har har).

An "escapism".

The fact of the matter is, I went and played Chaos Wars because someone has been fucking hogging the PS3 and Xbox360 on MY big 67" TV (which I bought with my own money) after he saw me playing Valkyria Chronicles. I haven't been able to get on since, unless he is at work, which is when I play the game. This leaves me with three options. Play on the PSP, DS or PS2. I happened to choose Chaos Wars on the PS2--in Japanese. So what?

Put on the headphones (since you are hogging the newer bigger TV you can do that) if you are so irritated by the voices.

Some of the games I have played really touched me. Like Lost Odyssey, it made me cry in certain points. Just because I say a game is good, it doesn't mean it's just good, it's just because I understand you won't ....fucking...get...it even if I explain it to you, or you'll make fun of it.

To the person who said play a good RPG like a final fantasy game. I have completed all of them except 8 and 11 (since that is a mmorpg). To the person who said golden sun...I completed them both. To the people who say play Valkyria Chronicles, I say read above. I am trying to!

To the people who say he should commit violence against me for playing the games I enjoy, does this mean when he plays games I think are retarded I get to beat him to death with a controller? Because it's oh so very tempting.

And about my cows. I could go on about how he collects dollar store toy knock offs. Or owls to put in random escapist photos. Or about how he was seen just a few nights ago cuddled up with my big cow petting it and wishing ...it...was...a...dog.

I think I'll end it with that.

PS...

I know he posts here frequently and I saw him making a post about me which irritated the shit out of me. We actually got into an argument about it and I am still pissed off. No one on here knows what kind of person I truly am. Thanks to those that kind of stuck up for me and what I like to play. I am who I am, I'm not about to change it for anything--or anyone.

And to the person who put in the cow cover for the Xbox. Cute. I want one, thanks for showing it to me.
I have no idea who this person is. Honestly.
 

itsnotyouitsme

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Dec 27, 2008
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Let bygones be bygones. Slap on your headphone and be off. it's not like she's forcing you to play the games... (squeaky voice) right? (shivers)
 

JediMB

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Oct 25, 2008
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Bevvie said:
Real or not, it was great to read this post.

But you didn't finish Final Fantasy VIII? That breaks my heart.

(Now, where did I put those Final Fantasy XI discs...)
 

EMO_of_LiGHT

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Jan 25, 2009
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well, my last girlfriend sat around all day playing casual games, like that tank internet game. I've long since forrgotten the name, but it's like Wormz, but a hell of a lot less compelling. but she played it for hours. I bought her Team Fortress 2 for her birthday, and she deleted it from her computer so she'd have room to download videos of chipmunks, before going to play that damn tank game for another 7 hours nonstop. I dumped her soon after, not for this, but she also was kind of a *****.
 

ExplosionProofTaco

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Nov 13, 2008
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I reckon you should trade your girlfriend in for something of equal or lesser value at your local walmart. they sell everything there I heard.
 

Bevvie

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Jan 24, 2009
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JediMB said:
Bevvie said:
Real or not, it was great to read this post.

But you didn't finish Final Fantasy VIII? That breaks my heart.

(Now, where did I put those Final Fantasy XI discs...)
I am real I assure you. I'm sure a mod could check that the IP matches Decoy's if you really wanted them to. And I didn't finish FF8, because unfortunately I lost my game save after I moved and I was on disk 3. I did play it, I just did not finish it.

And no I am not forcing him to play any games. It would be amusing to try though. Set up my cows full of booby traps if he tries to stop playing or if he leaves the room sounds good to me.

And right now, he's hogging the TV after I got home from a grueling day of trying to get our car fixed, playing the game I bought, Valkyria Chronicles. So who is up for some Chaos Wars, on full blast hmm?