One Sentence Summaries

[MikeTheElf]

Doom - Play it because the music is kick-ass.
Halo - I can shoot more aliens?
Gears of War 2 - Quick, get to the chest-high wall!
Guitar Hero 4 (World Tour) - A rip-off of Rock Band with shittier songs.
Final Fantasy (insert any number here) - Turn-based JRPG made of nonsense.
L4D - Running won't save you from zombies.
L4D (expert) - SHOOT IT IN THE FACE BEFORE IT GETS NEAR YOU!!! -or- Don't shoot the car or I will slit your throat! -or- Do NOT accidentally friendly-fire with the shotgun!
Pokemon - You get a grass/fire/water Pokemon, train it, and kill other Pokemon; nothing has changed.

 

[Mr.Pandah]

Empire total war : Never thought a game this buggy could be so awesome
Red Alert 3 : What the hell did I miss.
Grand ages Rome : Ima gona build myself in Rome, roman style.
Half-Life : Got wrench, Will travel.
Ballistics : Supersonic speed freak.
Baldur's Gate : It could be better if it gave blowjobs.

The Half-Life one confused me...I'll wait and see if anyone else picks up on it

 

[The Electric Victorian]

Dear JRPG developers (a haiku):

I can't skip cutscenes
Before difficult boss fights
I hate you so very much

 

[jake09050]

Empire total war : Never thought a game this buggy could be so awesome
Red Alert 3 : What the hell did I miss.
Grand ages Rome : Ima gona build myself in Rome, roman style.
Half-Life : Got wrench, Will travel.
Ballistics : Supersonic speed freak.
Baldur's Gate : It could be better if it gave blowjobs.

The Half-Life one confused me...I'll wait and see if anyone else picks up on it

Yeah it's a crowbar dude.

 

[Neesa]

MapleStory: Fuckin' Nexon, gimme my money back.
Guitar Hero/Rock Band: Get better fingers...Now.

 

[Raziel_Likes_Souls]

Custer Revenge: Cactus Rape.
Soul Reaver: I Need More...Souls.
Soul Reaver etc: SOULS!

 

[boyitsme95]

Mass Effect: Just some elevator music would be fine, really.
Metal Gear Solid 4: That was awsome.
Eat Lead: The Return of Matt Hazard: Buy it so they make a sequel!
World of Warcraft: Intervention, please.
Warcraft III: I don't want an intervention.

 

[ManiacalZManiac]

Megaman 9
THIS GAME IS SO FUCKING HARD!!!

 

[Tesgami]

Dear JRPG developers (a haiku):

I can't skip cutscenes
Before difficult boss fights
I hate you so very much

Damn true!

Soul Caliber *number* : Underdressed or over complicated fight with monstrous swords and bladed hula-hoops.
Final Fantasy XII: (quote from elementary school brother) : Where is the bunny lady's clothes?!
Force Unleashed: Another reason to hate George Lucas
Kingdom Hearts: Only place you can fight along side Donald Duck, Tarzan, Goofy, Jack Skellington, Peter Pan, Beast, and Ariel.
(Seriously though?! Who the hell wants to fight beside the Little Mermaid?! >_<)

 

[the captain]

Wii Fit: Oh god, I think I pulled something!!!!!

 

[ManiacalZManiac]

Final Fantasy XII: (quote from elementary school brother) : Where is the bunny lady's clothes?!

That one made me laugh my ass off. xD

 

[Tesgami]

I'm glad he didn't see Eruyt Village, that would be... *whistle*...
And I love your avatar by the way XD

 

[Ronwue]

Empire total war : Never thought a game this buggy could be so awesome
Red Alert 3 : What the hell did I miss.
Grand ages Rome : Ima gona build myself in Rome, roman style.
Half-Life : Got wrench, Will travel.
Ballistics : Supersonic speed freak.
Baldur's Gate : It could be better if it gave blowjobs.

The Half-Life one confused me...I'll wait and see if anyone else picks up on it

Yeah it's a crowbar dude.

I was a bit ironic towards it. In hindsight the joke would have been better with a crowbar... ah well.

 

[Trifer420]

Gears of war, THIS GAME NEEDS MORE TESTOSTERONE!

Ninja gaiden (For xbox, and ps3) good luck.

counter strike, it should be okay to die, it's a freaking video game.

Halo 3, liars, liars, liars and fan boys; Halo 1 is still so much better.

Killzone, nazis or some similar oppressive faction with red eyes and in the future.

armored core, wait, we can actually see it in action?

Haze, Rather get high in real life.

Metal gear solid 4, this could be a movie and no one will notice; to be honest, it kinda is.

 

[SimuLord]

Empire: Total War: Soon as they work the bugs out, this will be the greatest game ever made.
Oblivion: Hope you're not doin' anything for, like, a year. (cookie for the reference)
Morrowind: Kill 'em all, God will recognize his own. Or: You can't spell "serial manslaughter" without Laughter!
Myst: And people wonder why GameFAQs was invented.
The Sims 2: Playing God is so much fun when God is Chaotic Evil.

 

[More Fun To Compute]

Persona 3: I have to fight monsters now but what I really want to do is go to school and hang around with a fat kid.
Mount & Blade: I'll stop playing after just one more skirmish and I really mean it this time.
Dead Rising: Bloody hell Otis stop calling to tell me about survivors, can't you see that I'm trying to put funny hats on these zombies heads so I can get a good picture for my photo album.
Okami: That was a pretty good Zelda clone but why is it still going like it doesn't realise that it's finished and expects me to keep on playing.