one sentence to save your life.

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AgDr_ODST

Cortana's guardian
Oct 22, 2009
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zpm4737 said:
If it weren't for that horse, I wouldn't have spent that year in college!
LEWIS BLACK quote FTW!!!!!

OT: Oh come on man you wouldn't shoot a guy that just got engaged would you?
 

SalamanderJoe

New member
Jun 28, 2010
1,378
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What is the airspeed of an unladen swallow?!
OR...
Why is a raven like a writing desk?

Something to baffle them with as my make my escape via rope ladder hanging from a passing helicopter...
 

Gokuofuin

New member
Jan 6, 2010
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"You do realize that I am a decoy"
then when they pause for a moment kick the first guy in the balls and take the second guys guy out of his hand and shoot them both, then walk away calmly till I hear the sound of sirens...
 

Xixikal

New member
Apr 6, 2011
323
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"I am your father!"

Hopefully, that moments distraction as they realise I'm actually a woman would be enough for an escape.
 

Fanta Grape

New member
Aug 17, 2010
738
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"Oh My God! Steve! Is that you? I haven't seen you since middle school! How have you been?"

(and pray to God one of them is named Steve)
 

tzimize

New member
Mar 1, 2010
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Leemaster777 said:
"If any of you get any closer, I'm gonna throw my shit at you!"

I would then proceed to drop my pants and start shitting right there in the alley. So they know SHIT JUST GOT REAL.
Wahahah, and ewwww.

OT: Why waste time talking when I can run some more?
 

PMorgan18

New member
Apr 6, 2010
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"At least put the gun to my head." Then I will either disarm him or stab him with one of knives I always carry with me.
 

Doclector

New member
Aug 22, 2009
5,010
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Please stop, you're pissing me off, and I'm already rather hungry, and that is a very bad, very unwise, combination of feelings to put me in.
 

Mordekaien

New member
Sep 3, 2010
820
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I would take my wallet, raise it up, then proceed to throw it on the ground shouting; Pikachu, I choose you!!!!

(Fun fact: I saw it RL. It works :D )
 

Jon Shannow

New member
Oct 11, 2010
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"What is the opposite of opposite? Consider yourself bamboozled!" *runs away while they're distracted*
 

ProtoChimp

New member
Feb 8, 2010
2,236
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Well this is more of a paragraph but whatever.

I would say with a completely straight face, very emotional:

"Dig if you will the picture, you and I engaged in a kiss, the sweat of your body covers me, can you my darling, can you picture this, dream if you can a courtyard, an oceon of violets in bloom, animals strike curious poses, they feel the heat the heat between me and you."
(At this point I would then run up to one of them and grap onto one his lapel)
"How could you just leave me standing, alone in a world that's so cold, so cold, maybe I'm just too demanding, maybe I'm just like my father, too bold, maybe I'm just like my mother, she's never satisfied, she's never satisfied, whay do we scream at each other, this is what it sounds like *starts crying* when doves cry".

Perhaps that would be so heartfelt and emotional *sniggers* that they would lay down their weapons, see just how wrong they were and join me in emaculate chorus.
 

Valdus

New member
Apr 7, 2011
343
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"You can't shoot me with those...the safety is still on."

Then leg it before they check.