Open Relationships, what do you think?

[Thaius]

There is no point of being in a relationship if you're going to be sleeping around. Sex is, whether you like it or not, a display of love. It's a physical way to display love and commitment. To think of it as nothing more than reproductive recreation is to deny one of the things that makes humanity civilized rather than animalistic. If you actually love someone, you won't want to be screwing other people.

 

[Gindil]

it's our strongest still thriving instinct.

why not listen to it?

There are things out there that you might catch.

Just because it's an instinct, doesn't mean you have to follow it wholeheartedly.

 

[Jaranja]

There is no point of being in a relationship if you're going to be sleeping around. Sex is, whether you like it or not, a display of love. It's a physical way to display love and commitment. To think of it as nothing more than reproductive recreation is to deny one of the things that makes humanity civilized rather than animalistic. If you actually love someone, you won't want to be screwing other people.

I just don't like the feel of this post. Mainly the "Sex is, whether you like it or not, a display of love" part is throwing me off. Why? Is that an absolute for everyone? I'm calling bullshit.

 

[rokkolpo]

it's our strongest still thriving instinct.

why not listen to it?

There are things out there that you might catch.

Just because it's an instinct, doesn't mean you have to follow it wholeheartedly.

still see no bad things coming from listening to that precise instinct.
as long as you use a condom that is.

 

[DocBalance]

it's our strongest still thriving instinct.

why not listen to it?

There are things out there that you might catch.

Just because it's an instinct, doesn't mean you have to follow it wholeheartedly.

still see no bad things coming from listening to that precise instinct.
as long as you use a condom that is.

You have fun and let me know how that works out for you, mate. As for me, committed relationships all the way, everything else is just BS.

 

[Thaius]

There is no point of being in a relationship if you're going to be sleeping around. Sex is, whether you like it or not, a display of love. It's a physical way to display love and commitment. To think of it as nothing more than reproductive recreation is to deny one of the things that makes humanity civilized rather than animalistic. If you actually love someone, you won't want to be screwing other people.

I just don't like the feel of this post. Mainly the "Sex is, whether you like it or not, a display of love" part is throwing me off. Why? Is that an absolute for everyone? I'm calling bullshit.

I suppose I should have worded it differently. The point was that, culturally, sex means something (or at least it should: it's been defiled plenty in recent years, but the idea is still that sex means love). Point being, you'll be hard-pressed to find someone who wouldn't think you're a douche if you're married and sleeping around, let along a wife who'd be okay with it. It may be an area where you have to decide whether your own views are worth being estranged from society as such, but sociologically the idea doesn't work out either. The "family unit" is an incredibly important part of any society, and is absolutely vital to the functionality of any society. To take the exclusivity of sex out of that concept would be a huge blow. Things like this are the things that separate us from animals: we are cultured, and can create a society in which we can all coexist. The family unit (and thus, sexual exclusivity) is one of many things that, if eliminated from society, could cause a complete collapse of it (I know it sounds melodramatic, but I cannot stress the importance of this concept to a working society).

So it's not necessarily an absolute for everyone: I believe it is, but I don't expect everyone to go by the same belief system as I. Point is, you may think like this, but society as a whole has an extremely good reason to disagree.

 

[Quid Plura]

I don't agree with it, but it's fine if both people are ok with it. I also think though, that there's always one person in the relationship who is less ok with it, thus creating a time bomb. Use a condom though..

 

[Tireseas_v1legacy]

If you two can do it and maintain a good, healthy relationship, then good for you, you fall into the 1% of humans who can.

 

[nightwolf667]

I think that for an open relationship to work both people have to be okay with it and view sex in the same way. There's nothing wrong with it per se, but it can become extremely hurtful over time if one person was just trying to give the other person (who they love) what they want. It's also something that should be talked out. For instance, after I broke up with my stinky ex (who I'd been with for a year and still cared about a lot because I was young, naive, and because love really does make you stupid), we ended up with an on and off thing going because he kept calling me up for sex. He was the first boyfriend I'd had that kind of intimate relationship with and for me, sex was a representation of love and for him, sex was just instant gratification getting what he wanted. But he never came right out and said it, instead he kept using me assuming that I knew what the stakes were when I didn't and seeing other people on the side and not telling me about it. After all, in his mind he had no claim on me, I was free to do the same (but boy, he would have gotten really upset if I had). In fact, one of the months we were living together right before we broke up, he invited another girl back to his house, very flirty and with the obvious intention of sleeping with her. That was when I walked out. But he still texts me for sex, even after I told him I had a boyfriend.

My point is: open relationships are great if it's what both people want. But sex can be and is for a lot of people a very personal experience. Sometimes it can create a very strong emotional bond between two people, even if only one of them feels it, and can be used to manipulate someone. I'm not saying sex is sacred, I'm just saying that a relationship needs to make the rules clear and not pussy foot around. That's all.

 

[Deofuta]

I feel like it would be wayyyyy to awkward. Not going to lie i've only had one partner so i am not exactly sure what it would feel like exactly. I feel as if Monogamy is the way to go here.

 

[Jaranja]

There is no point of being in a relationship if you're going to be sleeping around. Sex is, whether you like it or not, a display of love. It's a physical way to display love and commitment. To think of it as nothing more than reproductive recreation is to deny one of the things that makes humanity civilized rather than animalistic. If you actually love someone, you won't want to be screwing other people.

I just don't like the feel of this post. Mainly the "Sex is, whether you like it or not, a display of love" part is throwing me off. Why? Is that an absolute for everyone? I'm calling bullshit.

I suppose I should have worded it differently. The point was that, culturally, sex means something (or at least it should: it's been defiled plenty in recent years, but the idea is still that sex means love). Point being, you'll be hard-pressed to find someone who wouldn't think you're a douche if you're married and sleeping around, let along a wife who'd be okay with it. It may be an area where you have to decide whether your own views are worth being estranged from society as such, but sociologically the idea doesn't work out either. The "family unit" is an incredibly important part of any society, and is absolutely vital to the functionality of any society. To take the exclusivity of sex out of that concept would be a huge blow. Things like this are the things that separate us from animals: we are cultured, and can create a society in which we can all coexist. The family unit (and thus, sexual exclusivity) is one of many things that, if eliminated from society, could cause a complete collapse of it (I know it sounds melodramatic, but I cannot stress the importance of this concept to a working society).

So it's not necessarily an absolute for everyone: I believe it is, but I don't expect everyone to go by the same belief system as I. Point is, you may think like this, but society as a whole has an extremely good reason to disagree.

Fair enough. Thanks for clearing up your point for me. You make a good point. "Human Nature" is pretty important. It's a bit like the whole communist thing (going against human nature). I'm just saying, I think the social causes are greater than the genetic ones. It may have started out as people being jealous but it has evolved to the point where it's, as you said, the social norm to not have an open relationship.

 

[craddoke]

Love as thou wilt.

 

[ThreeKneeNick]

Never had one, but like the idea in theory. I did have sex with no emotions so that could work, but i might just be saying that cause i got commitment issues.

 

[Evil the White]

I'll just stick to the one girl, and she can stick to me. Being the chubby, bespectacled nerd that I am, I at least like to know if my girlfriend's cheating legitimately.

Also I'm Christian, so that goes against my views. There, I mentioned my religion, come get me.

 

[Ben Legend]

No, I don't see how they can work. And seriously, if I was with somebody and they asked for an open relationship I would tell them where to go.

 

[Michael Comeau]

It's probably not for everyone but consenting adults should be free to do what they want with other consenting adults that are fully aware of the situation.

 

[Doctor VonSexMachine]

I've never seen it work. In my experience it's either one partners wants the freedom but wants the other one to remain monogamous, or it descends into a shitshow of mind games.

It's not my thing. I've had emotionless sex, but it's always been much better in a relationship.

 

[Marter]

I don't like this concept. Intercourse is one of the best ways to show emotion, and in many cases is a pure display of emotion. Sleeping around just seems wrong to me.

 

[Gigaguy64]

I don't think so Tim.jpg

To me Sexual Intercourse is more than just making a baby or an act of pleasure.

Its a deep act of love where a man and a woman become one.

I believe it is something that should be saved for the person you love, and in the commitment of marriage.

Sex and Love go hand in hand.

And yes, people get jealous, your in a Relationship with them.

 

[Sinisterair]

Hey if both of you are fine with it go ahead but its disrespectful to fool around behind a persons back, espescially if they are in it for you not sex