Ordinary Household Items that double as Epic Weapons!!

[Cabisco]

Toaster. seriously put it at a high enough setting and u will be able to pop flaming burnt toast at people every 2 minutes or so. I also heard that a tooth decays in a day when left in coke, so you could simply get your attacker, skin him to the bone and then put him into a bath of coke, then he will die after about a day A third one would be windows. Seriously go smash a window in your house and pick up one of the shards. Go on, now, i give you permission.

 

[KAPTAINmORGANnWo4life]

If any female in your house has those stupid high-heeled deathtr--I mean shoes, you could spear your assailant to the floor and stab him in the brain with one.

Oh, and there's also spoons. They're blunt, they'll hurt more.

 

[nart_21086]

Glue some corn holders to some oven mitts to make anti zombie gauntlets...
...drench in vegetable oil and ignite for added effects.

 

[SirDerick]

Considering that nearly all ancient Chinese weapons originated from regular household objects (they were farmers) I can't say that I'm surprised.

 

[Amnestic]

DVD's Ninja Death Discs.

On another note. Deodorant could make a good make shift Dildo in a pinch

...

I don't even want to know. Especially considering my deoderant can is in this [http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_aWwr8g03OwY/SojgXePpoJI/AAAAAAAAAR8/Xgo5QmsmXeo/s400/lynx_deodorant_body_spray_dark_temptation_11363.jpg] shape.

Any sort of electrical wire/cable could be used to throttle people I suppose.

How is a "good make shift Dildo" a decent weapon? You must have taken some pretty F--king weird martial arts classes.

Evidently you've never played GTA: San Andreas!

 

[The Kangaroo]

Spoiler

Lawn Mower against the undead!


I know it's obvious, but hey.

That scene has both the most amount of blood ever AND the most psychologically scarring buttocks that I have ever seen

 

[cheese_wizington]

Fire pokes for the win, That will will ruin anyone's day if you jammed that into their side

or you know kitchen knives. Those will work

Yeah, I have a shit load of cast iron fire pokes that are as sharp as hell.

 

[Pm0n3y]

Household item? Like knifes, and forks, or are we talking my house cause I got a shotgun not to far away that would be a pretty decent weapon, I could smash people with the butt of it or something.


Yeah sorry, just trying to point out I find this topic not very well thought out. Are we to exclude normal things in houses that are pretty much legitimate weapons, and just asking about makeshift weapons?

Your shotgun is a "Ordinary household item"? Cuz it sounds like a gun to me. I guess you can use it to iron your clothes or brush your teeth. Whatever floats your boat.

But i meant household item, as in something ordinary (like an ironing board or picture frame) that most people wouldn't usually use as a weapon.

 

[Danpascooch]

DVD's Ninja Death Discs.

On another note. Deodorant could make a good make shift Dildo in a pinch

...

I don't even want to know. Especially considering my deoderant can is in this [http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_aWwr8g03OwY/SojgXePpoJI/AAAAAAAAAR8/Xgo5QmsmXeo/s400/lynx_deodorant_body_spray_dark_temptation_11363.jpg] shape.

Any sort of electrical wire/cable could be used to throttle people I suppose.

How is a "good make shift Dildo" a decent weapon? You must have taken some pretty F--king weird martial arts classes.

Evidently you've never played GTA: San Andreas!

Yeah...I certainly won't ever pick it up now.

 

[Archemetis]

I'd honestly consider any person weilding Dual Dining Tables to be epic.

 

[The Kangaroo]

Another good weapon to use on attackers is a frozen egg, it is as hard as a rock and if it kills them you can just say that you threw an egg at them

 

[Beastialman]

Microwave+ a rolling pin. Bash in the clear door and start up the microwave facing it away from you, or slam it onto someone's head and watch their face get cooked.

Edit: Changing roller to rolling pin.

 

[the-messy-ghost]

Coffee mug makes a good fist weapon.

 

[NuclearPenguin]

Weeeeed.
I would smoke with them

 

[gutterball17]

Shove their hand in a blender while it's on and beat them over the head with it after that. If it breaks, use the shards of glass to cut them. Then you just need a mop.

 

[MelziGurl]

Fuck household items, my mother my grandfathers blunt machete in her cupboard. I know where I would heading if my parents house was broken into

 

[Amethyst Wind]

Household item? Like knifes, and forks, or are we talking my house cause I got a shotgun not to far away that would be a pretty decent weapon, I could smash people with the butt of it or something.


Yeah sorry, just trying to point out I find this topic not very well thought out. Are we to exclude normal things in houses that are pretty much legitimate weapons, and just asking about makeshift weapons?

Your shotgun is a "Ordinary household item"? Cuz it sounds like a gun to me. I guess you can use it to iron your clothes or brush your teeth. Whatever floats your boat.

But i meant household item, as in something ordinary (like an ironing board or picture frame) that most people wouldn't usually use as a weapon.

Goddammit you psychic bastard! I get 100% ninja'd. I was gonna say Ironing board and picture frame. Break the frame over a guy's head, then break his arm by putting it between the folding legs of the ironing board and jumping on it.

 

[grollo]

Well, frying pans, kitchen knives, and other similar thing found in a kitchen would be good.

Also, lighter glued to hairspray for a makeshift flamethrower.

 

[hittite]

Never underestimate the head-crushing power of a toilet tank's lid.

 

[Bruden]

This is the first time I've lived in a house with less than 5 guns in it, and it's simply because my roommate dislikes them. I myself, and my family consider guns to be a household item, so I totally agree with the people who offer it as an option. Putting that aside however, I'd go with the rod from the shower curtain, mine's 3ft, extends to 5ft, and is made of metal.