Poll: Am I a Bad Person?

[Agayek]

meh theres a time and place for honesty. this doesnt seem to be it, however

The time and place for honesty is always and everywhere.

The simple fact of the matter is that the truth doesn't change, regardless of what we tell ourselves or each other. Hiding from that doesn't help anything.


OT: I'd say you were in the right, or at the very least correct. You likely could have been more tactful, but I probably would have done the same thing.

 

[s0denone]

So now you have to censor the truth?

Oh? Oh? OH??

Oh, you mean one should display restraint enough to not tell someone whose friend/familymember has recently passed away that they were stupid and deserved to die?

I won't even go into what I would have done, if someone said something like that to me in such circumstances. Needless to say, it is extremely insensitive, displays a complete lack of empathy and understanding of social norms.

 

[Starke]

Does this mean im a jerk or would you have done the same?

I wouldn't have done the same, I would have argued my position vigorously.

Seriously, you[footnote]Not "you," Mr. Google, but the idefinite, "your opponent".[/footnote] want to reward these girls for trying to kill themselves? If it was some tragic accident or they were stone cold sober and the OTHER driver was drunk, then sure, there's definitely a place for sympathy or compassion, but they got shitfaced and then they got dead, and you want alms for this shit?

 

[spartan231490]

So this Tuesday 3 girls went drunk driving at 11 AM and crashed. 1 died 2 are in a coma. One of there friends came around asking for a donation to help pay there medical bills. I declined and said if theyre dumb enough to go drunk driving at 11 in the morning on a snowday when the roads are bad then they can face the consequence and pay for it themselves. I got a lot of dirty looks and i was told i was being selfish. Does this mean im a jerk or would you have done the same?

You are 100% correct. Why should anyone else pay for their mistakes. It's not like it was some 1/1,000,000 thing, they drove around drunk when the roads were shit. they absolutely deserve what they got and if they had asked me for money, I would have said something like "No I won't give you my money, but I will nominate them for a Darwin award/honorable mentions." Maybe even added that I'm glad their stupidity bit them in the asses.

 

[Blue_vision]

Yeah, those girls may have been idiots for driving drunk late at night, but guess what? They have friends and family, who love them for reasons other than or regardless of their intelligence. Do you feel that you should decide that they deserve to die because they acted stupid? What kind of effect would that have on their families if they died, or if they had to sell their house because of medical expenses or something? It'd be terrible. How do you think those girls may act after they've experienced the adverse effects of driving under the influence? Simply how will someone feel in hearing that you think their friends or peers deserve to die?

I feel no restraint in saying that you sir, are a self-defined virtuous scumbag.

 

[archvile93]

I don't know them so why should I care? I suppose it is a little selfish, but I really don't see why I should pay for their mistakes, especially if I don't care. Maybe I'm just too jaded and unloving (a life of unhappiness, dissapointment, and social avoidence will do that), but giving up my money for others wouldn't make me feel better so I see no reason to do so. That's how I feel on the subject anyway. Maybe you should've just said no and left it at that.

you do not have to feel bad for the people but if you should ever be injured and beg others for financial assistance for your injuries that would make you a hypocrite and you would probably not receive any money

Not a problem, they wouldn't give me any either way.

that wouldn't have anything to do with everyone thinking your huge jerkass would it????

They wouldn't give me anything regardless. What does being selfless get you exactly? A lot of people that owe you. OWE you, they're not actually going to pay it back. Let me ask you this, if I did give money to someone in a similar situation, and after they recover an unfortunate accident happens to me, are they going to return the favor? Are they even going to remember me? Of course not. They'll respond with apathy and go on their merry way. So why the hell should I care about them?

 

[ahappycamper]

People die all the time, why should they expect you to pay for it, this is no different than begging, do you even know these people? Is there any actual reason why they thought you would give them money???

 

[kaizen2468]

Most people have a thing called tact. Obviously this person asking for a donation cared for one or more of those girls. Maybe they were related? Maybe they were long time friends. You got a dirty look because you very bluntly insulted 3 people this person cares for. Why say something like that anyway, you aren't teaching anyone a lesson or doing any good. Totally without tact or class and yes, you are a bad person for saying that.

 

[spartan231490]

The OP didn't do the right thing, he should have punched them in the face.

There are thousands of people killed or put in to critical condition every year by drunk drivers, they don't deserve ANY money, frankly they don't deserve to live, feelings be damned!

You're basically saying that the OP should've punched the person that asked him for the money, even though that person had nothing to do with it. You're also saying that they deserve to die, despite the fact that a person close to them has died and that they will most likely learn from this experience.

Firstly they are trying to get peoples money, people that have nothing to do with it and they are doing this by appealing to their emotions and trying to guilt them in to helping, so yes, a good punch is in order.
Would they be going door to door looking for money if thee idiots had killed someone?
The hell they would, they quite clearly only care about their own, their selfish, stupid, irresponsible own.

Secondly, I meant those in the car should die, not those asking for money.
And if they were capable of learning anything they wouldn't have tried to drive in the first place.
They were selfish, stupid and they could well have killed or maimed someone that was responsible enough to NOT get rat arsed and drive on an icy road.

you see the problem with punching people is that they tend to punch back and unless your strength stat is higher than theirs(which it probably isn't considering your post number) you are the one that needs medical attention

That doesn't make anything he said wrong, the 3 in the car were incredibly stupid and selfish, and if i had my way, would receive no medical treatment, certainly not charity. The ones going door to door for money are just stupid entitled twats who think that their friends deserve money, despite the fact that they risked innocent lives in addition to their own, simply by product of being their friends. That said, I suggest an emotional punch, it hurts more and longer.

 

[NeutralMunchHotel]

The fact that people agree with the OP and think that the girls deserved it explain why the Escapist is now a terrible, terrible place to be.

Seriously, so many of you have no basic sense of empathy, it's frightening.

 

[Coop83]

So this Tuesday 3 girls went drunk driving at 11 AM and crashed. 1 died 2 are in a coma. One of there friends came around asking for a donation to help pay there medical bills. I declined and said if theyre dumb enough to go drunk driving at 11 in the morning on a snowday when the roads are bad then they can face the consequence and pay for it themselves. I got a lot of dirty looks and i was told i was being selfish. Does this mean im a jerk or would you have done the same?

There were two things I wanted to say to this scenario:

1) I totally agree with your standpoint. There is nothing tragic about it, the girl that died should be awarded with a Darwin Award, though she doesn't qualify, since she was under the influence of alcohol. If you're stupid enough to be drunk at 11am, then you're asking for trouble.

2) If you're going to go around begging, you've got to accept that some people are not going to be as "gung-ho" and charitable about the whole thing. If I'd gotten myself into that sort of trouble, the support from my friends would be a great thing, but I would tell them that I don't deserve it, because I was an arse and got myself into the situation myself.

But I digress. What I meant to say was that at Xmas, there were some carol singers at my local supermarket over the festive period and as I went in through the door, one of their lackeys proceeded to shove a bucket under my nose, expecting seasonal goodwill and a few coins for their charity. I'm not an uncharitable soul, by nature, but if people are trying to force me to part with my cash, then I tend to dig my heels in.

I politely said "no, thank you" and the looks I got were horrendous. I may as well have walked into a nativity play at the local civic centre and drop kicked the baby masquerading as Jesus, for all the difference it would have made to their low opinion of me. What would they do to the Sikh family that were shopping at the same time, I wondered, as I made my way around the shop and attempted to find an alternative exit.

Yes, it was a nice gesture by the friends of those involved in the incident, but you are well within your rights to choose who (if anyone) you give your charity moneys to.

 

[Doive]

What response did you expect from someone who had one recently deceased friend and two in comas?
Selfishness isn't just about money, it's about compassion too, and by calling someone's dead friend an idiot, however right you think you were, you were incredibly selfish and insensitive.

 

[TwitchierGuitar]

As odd as it is that you're asking advice from the internet, I'd say no... You had every right to say that... let the stupid ones die off...

 

[archvile93]

I don't know them so why should I care? I suppose it is a little selfish, but I really don't see why I should pay for their mistakes, especially if I don't care. Maybe I'm just too jaded and unloving (a life of unhappiness, dissapointment, and social avoidence will do that), but giving up my money for others wouldn't make me feel better so I see no reason to do so. That's how I feel on the subject anyway. Maybe you should've just said no and left it at that.

you do not have to feel bad for the people but if you should ever be injured and beg others for financial assistance for your injuries that would make you a hypocrite and you would probably not receive any money

Not a problem, they wouldn't give me any either way.

that wouldn't have anything to do with everyone thinking your huge jerkass would it????

They wouldn't give me anything regardless. What does being selfless get you exactly? A lot of people that owe you. OWE you, they're not actually going to pay it back. Let me ask you this, if I did give money to someone in a similar situation, and after they recover an unfortunate accident happens to me, are they going to return the favor? Are they even going to remember me? Of course not. They'll respond with apathy and go on their merry way. So why the hell should I care about them?

I'm sorry Friedrich Nietzsch I wasn't aware you were posting on this website

Sorry I don't know who that is, but I get the feeling you're not exactly proving me wrong with that remark.

 

[PrototypeC]

It's your choice, your money, and sob stories from the families aren't going to change your mind so easily. Should you have kept your (probably badly timed) opinion to yourself? I would say, yes. Should you have just given them the money and wished the girls well? No, it's your choice. They don't have the right to badmouth you just for that.

But then, I'm Satan.

 

[ReaperzXIII]

Bad person? No, Apathetic Asshole? Hell yes, welcome to the double AA, we're not alcoholics and we're definitely not anonymous, welcome to the club Mr. Dick (I jest I jest, its all in good assholish fun) - Wow that sounds wrong

Truthfully I would've refused to give them money too, if it was like 50p or something like that fine take it I don't care enough about 50p to mind giving them to medical bills, over £10? Then hell no, you expect me to pay for someone else's stupid mistake? Whilst they do not deserve to die for one stupid mistake I should not have to pay for it either, even if it was £5 it would take quite a bit of convincing.

Some things shouldn't be said, I would only say that if the person kept prodding at me or if I was feeling particularly assholish.

One of my friends told me her friend who I dont particularly give any shit about got drunk hit her head on a radiator, is in hospital coz she fainted and now she has brain swelling, my response? A cold, emotionless, dull and blank expressioned: "Aww sad times"

 

[ahappycamper]

Just read through the replies again, and yes this is NATURAL SELECTION working at its most efficient.

 

[Zarmi]

No, you aren't a bad person. From a moral stand point, maybe. But if you ask me, I would have done exactly the same. That's the punishment for being damn stupid enough to do something like that. Wouldn't give anything, myself. So good job, sir!