Poll: Did your parents hit you?
- Thread starter Blindswordmaster
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As far as I can recall mostly they threatened which usually was enough. I probably got a tap (slap on the wrist style) or two as a kid to keep me from taking stuff.
I was really hit once, by my dad. I think I was about 15-16 and I was in a fight (shouting not physical) with my mom, when my dad came in and apparently thought I was about to hit my mom, he hit me once, and that was quite enough to end the argument period.
I was really hit once, by my dad. I think I was about 15-16 and I was in a fight (shouting not physical) with my mom, when my dad came in and apparently thought I was about to hit my mom, he hit me once, and that was quite enough to end the argument period.
Well, I was smacked with a wooden spoon and it had neither filled me with a fear of said object or an urge to be violent myself. I think suggesting that people will be more voilent if smacked is a hopeless generalization. Indeed, I personally think the opposite is more likely to be true as smacking would have instilled in said child a proper respect for authority. But yeah, like you said, it's down to personal choice - I was smacked and i will smack my children. You weren't and you won't.TheDuckbunny said:
I can't even remember a time when wither of my parents were taller than me, so... no.
Don't think it would have made much of a difference.
Don't think it would have made much of a difference.
yes but only if i was really really bad. in general my parents would punish me in other ways... when little it was no dessert, go to your room, no TV etc. As i gre up the punishments changed depending on what was more effective.
Now i have to say i am more worried about my dad being disappointed in me than anything... my mum as well just not so much.
They also threaten to take away computer etc but incredibly rarely (as in once in the last two years) as it never gets that far
i am almost 16
and to those of you who advocate no hitting at all i completely disagree. whilst there are times when talking it over gives the best results that isn't always the case. A firm smack can often stop bad behavior but should only be used as a last resort. also just because your kids get to that stage doesn't mean you are a bad parent or live in a "bad environment".
Now i have to say i am more worried about my dad being disappointed in me than anything... my mum as well just not so much.
They also threaten to take away computer etc but incredibly rarely (as in once in the last two years) as it never gets that far
i am almost 16
and to those of you who advocate no hitting at all i completely disagree. whilst there are times when talking it over gives the best results that isn't always the case. A firm smack can often stop bad behavior but should only be used as a last resort. also just because your kids get to that stage doesn't mean you are a bad parent or live in a "bad environment".
. . . .OH! I just remember an example of how bad it can get if you "discipline" your child:
John Asunous(spelled wrong) the "laserman"/"lasermannen" that commited several near murders.
As a child he had been physically disciplined very brutally, and if his brother had done anything wrong or pieed his pants, John would have gotten beaten too.
This produced a fear of dissobeying rules and seeing other people deviate by minor details, since he had learned that if "they" did anything wrong, he would be punished too.
john ausuinous, google it .
You can argue that this is an extreme case but it is (in my humble opinion) true that "no hitting" parenting cannot produce these killers.
In worst case physical discipline produce serial killars while on the other han "no hitting" produces noizy bratts:
Wich would my fellow escapist prefer?
. . .or am I just using evil rethoric here?
John Asunous(spelled wrong) the "laserman"/"lasermannen" that commited several near murders.
As a child he had been physically disciplined very brutally, and if his brother had done anything wrong or pieed his pants, John would have gotten beaten too.
This produced a fear of dissobeying rules and seeing other people deviate by minor details, since he had learned that if "they" did anything wrong, he would be punished too.
john ausuinous, google it .
You can argue that this is an extreme case but it is (in my humble opinion) true that "no hitting" parenting cannot produce these killers.
In worst case physical discipline produce serial killars while on the other han "no hitting" produces noizy bratts:
Wich would my fellow escapist prefer?
. . .or am I just using evil rethoric here?
Honestly, Abuse when I was very little and I believe that has scared me pretty badly. Father was never liked by anyone due to his horrible tempter and perfectionist attitude, which he pressed harshly on me. Now.. I regret that I don't think highly on myself much. Plus I had to teach myself thing I need to know to keep myself out of any real serious trouble.
But as for physical punishment, I believe it's to teach the child right from wrong. They won't learn any other way (with most children).
If you use the child as a punching dummy to relieve frustration; that's child abuse
If you slap the child across the arse because you are disappointed for their poor decision; That's discipline.
Some people just don't know where that fine line between abuse and discipline and either don't care and abuse, too scared or don't believe in violence and let their children run wild. It's just a power you need to exercise caution for.
But as for physical punishment, I believe it's to teach the child right from wrong. They won't learn any other way (with most children).
If you use the child as a punching dummy to relieve frustration; that's child abuse
If you slap the child across the arse because you are disappointed for their poor decision; That's discipline.
Some people just don't know where that fine line between abuse and discipline and either don't care and abuse, too scared or don't believe in violence and let their children run wild. It's just a power you need to exercise caution for.
My stepdad said something like this. He said "I'm not saying I support corporal punishment in schools, but it would have improved discipline." I said "So would the death penalty. But that's not all it's about."SextusMaximus said:
Absolutely.tzimize said:
When a child is punished (whatever the method) for doing something unacceptable/wrong, that child will learn what not to do, instead of what to do. It's important to teach the child what is acceptable/right by rewarding them (which doesn't have to be an allowance or more privelages, it can be encouraging words, a pat on the back, or a hug). Consistently rewarding or punishing a child will condition them to know the proper way to act, the do's and do not's, and will teach them to appreciate what they are allowed, given or have.
But I honestly do not believe in physical punishment. I simply do not like the thought of a child not doing something (or doing something) for fear of physical pain. Ultimately, you're teaching a child to fear the physical pain that's accompanied by that thing they shouldn't do. I don't think that's acceptable, on any level, ever.
I disagree with physical punishment, but I'm sure there are more than acceptable circumstances to use it in, and I'm sure those who believe in it have valid reasons, to each their own. It's just those extreme cases of physical punishment leading to abuse that frustrate me (although most times that stems from a past experience or problem the adult has endured, never gotten past, and is suffering from).
I have a lot of respect for your opinions and beliefs.AndyFromMonday said:
For very serious matters or because I just refused to listen when I was told not to do something, yes. It's not as bad as some make it out to be. Certain types of children need certain types of punishments to correct bad behaviour. But, some parents make the mistake of not using an effective form of verbal communication to help the child understand why they got smacked. This is where some adults and teenagers get this idea that their parents are abusing them when they are not and most commonly that their parents didn't love them. If you're going to smack, be prepared to explain it and not expect the child to just know.
EDIT: Just a response to a quoted response above me. Tantrums are very VERY easy to read, I see and hear them everyday at work. You can tell when it's because they are tired or simply not getting what they want and spacking over it. I tend to see it in their eye contact and/or body language.
EDIT: Just a response to a quoted response above me. Tantrums are very VERY easy to read, I see and hear them everyday at work. You can tell when it's because they are tired or simply not getting what they want and spacking over it. I tend to see it in their eye contact and/or body language.
They did, im happy they did, it made me who i am today and i like who i am today (they stopped about when i entered my teen years, maybe... for fear i might start enjoying it 
Either way, they did physically punish me (no long term scars or anything, a spanking was the worst of it) and i will to my children assuming the government doesnt screw up child raising (like they are and have been trying to do)
Either way, they did physically punish me (no long term scars or anything, a spanking was the worst of it) and i will to my children assuming the government doesnt screw up child raising (like they are and have been trying to do)
If I did something really seriously bad, then yeah i'd get a smack. And to be honest, I agree with that. What a lot of people don't realise, is smacking your children isn't about the pain it causes them, it's about the shock it causes them. It makes a child stop and think "hang on, I REALLY have done something wrong here, that's why this is happening".
Now what I do NOT agree with is smacking your child with the sole intent of causing pain, because
1) That's morally wrong.
2) It won't work, because all you're doing is making them hate you for it.
3) If they can endure pain at all (ie if you do it too often), they ill no longer find it all that bad.
It should be a LAST resort, saved for when your child has done something REALLY bad, where you think the only way to get them to see that is to shock it into them. If your parents are usually really nice to you, and you do something to make them physically hurt you, you're going to KNOW that there's a reason for that.
And yeah no-one's going to read this since it's on the 10th page -_-
Now what I do NOT agree with is smacking your child with the sole intent of causing pain, because
1) That's morally wrong.
2) It won't work, because all you're doing is making them hate you for it.
3) If they can endure pain at all (ie if you do it too often), they ill no longer find it all that bad.
It should be a LAST resort, saved for when your child has done something REALLY bad, where you think the only way to get them to see that is to shock it into them. If your parents are usually really nice to you, and you do something to make them physically hurt you, you're going to KNOW that there's a reason for that.
And yeah no-one's going to read this since it's on the 10th page -_-
This is actually my view also. But once with physical made me learn. No other times needed.Superior Mind said:
occasional use of the slipper, which hurt like fuck
also occasional use of the wooden spoon, which didn't
also occasional use of the wooden spoon, which didn't
You should kick his ass, or at least talk to your mother about it. Thats just disgusting...brandon237 said:
I read it, if that makes you feel any better.Icecoldcynic said:
i got the meanest beatings heaps until i was like 7 i cant remember what for or if there was even a reason so i guess it didnt work my parents dont happen to be abusive though it was almost 18 years ago so that might have something to do with it
