BGH122 said:
LadyRhian said:
I think a lot of men would disagree with you there.
Then they'd be wrong, unless they could convincingly argue otherwise. I'm not attempting to be representative of men here, I'm 20 and, despite continual offers, I've not had sex. It doesn't interest me. Debating, reading, gaming, philosophy and medicinal science (though your knowledge vis-a-vis the biology of human sex puts mine to shame). I'm not exactly representative of most men and I'm not attempting to be.
LadyRhian said:
No problem. There are several ways to help men. First, there is a difference between "impotence" defined as an inability to get or keep an erection, and infertility, defined as being unable to conceive. In some cases, there is no help, as when Sperm are dead. But in sperm with low motility, sperm are collected and injected into the womb after the woman have ovulated. There is also the "Test Tube Baby" procedure- where eggs are removed, fertilized outside the womb, and then placed back in. The one about removing the Genetic material from a sperm and inserting some from another male was something I read a few years ago in a science magazine, but the other two are definitely done on a fairly regular basis.
http://www.amazingpregnancy.com/pregnancy-articles/464.html
http://www.amazingpregnancy.com/pregnancy-articles/370.html
Cheers! I'll search the Scientific American online back-issue database for that. I admit, this is an area of biology in which I'm woefully unlearned.
I don't know if it was SA. It's been a few years, and I just don't remember the name of the magazine. Sorry. For reasons of not remembering, I am going to withdraw that one from consideration. Although it should be possible, the same way that cloning Dolly the sheep was possible.
BGH122 said:
LadyRhian said:
Sure, but so does contraceptive sex. The qualitative difference between contraceptive and unprotected sex is its likelihood to produce a child. Anyone who partakes in the latter knows this and forgoes their right to act surprised and make up their decision vis-a-vis child bearing ad hoc when they conceive. They made it already when they chose to partake in unprotected sex.
LadyRhian said:
Sex is short for "Sexual intercourse", which is certainly not all about procreation. It is still a circular definition, because of how you are defining it. In short, then, if a man doesn't use a condom, he can't complain if the woman turns up pregnant and wants him to contribute to its support despite the fact that he doesn't want kids, because he made that choice, too, when he had sex. I'd actually like to see men take responsibility for their own sex organs, too. But so many men put the onus on the woman to make any and all reproductive choices when it comes to sex. They don't want to wear a condom, but vigorously blame the woman if she gets pregnant.
Okay, what if both parties are using contraception, and it fails? Who is responsible in that case? Since this can happen, too. Does the man owe the woman half the cost of the abortion, since neither wanted the child?
Fine, I used the wrong term, that doesn't make my term circular or else we can go down the route of saying all language is circular. Why does why mean why? Because. We could precisely define the word I mean when I say sex, but it'd significantly increase the length of our sentences, such let's just accept my qualifications on the word 'sex'.
I don't agree that a man should support the child if it's the woman's desire to keep it, because he's declared no interest in it. Frankly, if children could be incubated outside of the mother, the mother's declaration of wanting an abortion should see her out the picture too. Unfortunately she must currently play the role of incubator because we don't have the technology to replace her. If the father wishing for an abortion, who's declared no interest in the child, could play a similar role to the mother in a role reversal kind of way then that'd be fine, perhaps he should help the mother through her pregnancy? Do the stuff that she can't do because of her physical condition? It's only after the birth that the pro-abortion parent's link to the whole affair should be severed.
I'm not arguing in favour of sexists who want to blame women for having a child accidentally, regardless of whose fault it is, please don't cast me into roles for which I haven't argued. If neither person wore contraception they've both accepted to bear the child through to fruition if either parent wishes. If either wore contraception then they've both accepted that the parent will go it alone if they suddenly decide to have the child (this is only applicable to the woman, the man can't have the child since he gave up that right by having sex with a woman on contraception/using his own contraception).
For the pleasure and Bonding, you didn't ask what made it different from procreative sex, you asked "What other purpose does it serve?" I answered (and fixed the mistaken attribution, as those are my words, not King Pocky's.
It's a circular definition, since you claim that sex invariably results in a child, then say that the only reason to have sex is to have a child in the first place. If that's not a circulat definition, I don't know what is. "What is sex? The way to have a child. How do you conceive a child? By having sex!"
But the man made a decision, too- he decided to have sex without using a condom or any other means of contraception. So that makes it equally his decision to have that child- by having procreative sex in the first place. As they say, it takes two to tango. Now, you are saying that his decision to have that procreative sex and make that baby is less of a decision than hers is. If she gets pregnant and has that child, he doesn't have to support it- even though, according to you, it's her fault for choosing to have sex that could result in a baby. Why do men get a cop out? If the man wants the baby- according to you, the woman should be forced to have it just to make him feel better- but if he doesn't want it, despite choosing to have unprotected procreative sex- a choice he made as well... he shouldn't be obligated to support it.
Well, now I sure wish I could be a man in your world- all the power, none of the responsibilities! He has the right to force her to bear the child even if she doesn't want to- because she chose to have procreative non-contraceptive sex, but even though he made the same choice, she has to bear the responsibility of bearing and raising it if he decides he doesn't want it.
I have to admit, that makes me angry. Basically, it is all the woman's fault and none of the man's. That is what it comes down to in your scenario. At least make the man have responsibilities equal to the woman for having non-contraceptive procreative sex. As it is, he can change his mind at any point and just leave and have nothing more to do with the situation if he changes his mind, but the woman isn't able to if he decides he wants the kid.
You say, "I'm not arguing in favour of sexists who want to blame women for having a child accidentally, regardless of whose fault it is, please don't cast me into roles for which I haven't argued"- but you also said this- "I don't agree that a man should support the child if it's the woman's desire to keep it, because he's declared no interest in it". But he made that choice to have sex where it was possible to have that child he doesn't want to support- and like it's said- it takes two to tango. Basically, you just invalidated your own words.
I am going to take a long break from responding to this thread, because at this point, I am just too angry to continue.