Poll: Looking for real advice not moral zealots

[dontworryaboutit]

He says that HE wouldn't kill himself.

Tell me that he's able to vouch for the other two.

Um, tell me he can't?

I don't know what you're trying to say here.

He says that he wouldn't kill himself. How does he know the other two share this feeling? How do we know this won't fuck one of them up (most likely the friend) and lead to their suicide? People kill themselves over love all the time. You're saying he's willing to accept the possibility of this just so he can get his dick wet. I just can't condone that sort of thinking.

 

[dontworryaboutit]

He says that HE wouldn't kill himself.

Tell me that he's able to vouch for the other two.

Um, tell me he can't?

I don't know what you're trying to say here.

He says that he wouldn't kill himself. How does he know the other two share this feeling? How do we know this won't fuck one of them up (most likely the friend) and lead to their suicide? People kill themselves over love all the time. You're saying he's willing to accept the possibility of this just so he can get his dick wet. I just can't condone that sort of thinking.

Maybe they'll kill themselves if he doesn't do it because they'll feel rejected. People kill themselves over rejection in love all the time.

Tell me how that wasn't my point exactly? He stays with his fiance, the friend thinks too much of it and is heartbroken. Or he decides he likes the friend more and leaves his fiance for her. Fiance heartbroken.

These are hypothetical scenarios for the record. I'm not stating that suicide is inevitable, just that the possibility shouldn't be ruled out.

 

[ThreeWords]

snippity snip

I'll go with my normal attitude and say screw worrying and plans! The fact that you've seen the problems coming says to me that you're savy enough to deal with any that might arise

Also, I'm gonna spout some religion on you, not because I actually believe it, but because it's logical and makes sense. Here goes:
Buddhists reckon that even a 'wrong' action can be good for your karma, because there's more than just the act itself. I can't remember the others, but one of them is the intention. If the intention is good, then it can make a morally questionably act OK
In this instance, the threesome has possible problems, but you're not doing this to cheat on your fiancée, are you? Your intentions are good, and no one is thinking 'bad' thoughts, so I think the result should be good, no?

There's a problem here... That logic can be used to justify ANYTHING (stealing, murder, punching puppies, etc.). I'm no Buddhist, but my Buddhist friends would probably question that statement if they posted here.

True, but I'm using it as a reassurance, not as a justification. Another way of putting it would be since you want good things, and you don't have 'bad' intentions yourself, then things should turn out good

Also, do ask your Buddhist friends and correct me where I went wrong, please. I did Buddhism last year, and if I'm getting it wrong already it'd help to know

 

[Uncompetative]

Now it seems evident that you have weighed in on his 'side' and have taken issue with me mocking his concept of marriage. So I will explain. I don't expect you to agree with my position, but perhaps you will better understand my motivation.

This thread is called Poll: Looking for real advice not moral zealots. Now I don't consider myself to be a fundamentalist, a moral zealot, a prude, or an intolerant individual. However, I must admit I was annoyed by the OP as I felt he didn't have the right to discuss Marriage in an artificially restricted way.

Well then you're 100% wrong. This is a thread asking for advice about marriage as defined by the individual. Discuss it in that "restricted way" or GTFO. It's that simple.

I knew that the opinion I had to express on the matter transcended the essential question

In other words, you're a troll.

Excuse me, I have a report button I need to spam.

You haven't read my posts. I have discussed it in both the OP's artificially restricted way - I said 'go ahead' -as well as taking issue with his attempts at sidelining what I felt was an important (if not the most important) aspect of the situation. Yes, I did incorrectly assume that his concept of Marriage was based upon Religion and the sacred union of a man and a woman under the eyes of God as this is the most common form world-wide. Then I get him bleating that he's actually an atheist and I can't help but wonder why they are getting married at all. So far I haven't had an answer.

As I have said earlier, my position holds up even if you remove God from the concept of Marriage and treat it as marriage with a small m.

Fine.

However, that still leaves you with the thorny problem of Monogamy, which you are supposed to practice during your Engagement.

This is a thread asking for advice about marriage as defined by the individual.

Sorry, but marriage is defined by Church and State. What he seems to want is an Open Marriage, but without the social stigma as he has said that he only wants to do it once... Yeah, right. I don't believe that for a second. His fiancee - oh, how I tire of using that prim term for what by his description is a clearly unsatisfied bisexual slut - may have plans to get into the kind of acting that involves the use of wet-wipes after every successful take. Exciting as this may be at first, he will get jealous as he shares her with the world and then she talks him around to letting her move away from girl-on-girl to other, more profitable and extreme permutations.

Right now, I'm kinda hoping that this 3-way goes ahead and the "friend" unexpectedly turns up with an embarrassingly large strap-on and once she has successfully stimulated his fiancee's Grafenberg spot and made her make all manner of new and alarming noises, the two girls will flip him over and give him a night he won't soon forget...

So, in summary, I will continue to discuss all topics in an unrestricted way in accordance with my freedom of speech. You have the exact same right to use abusive acronyms at me. VitalSigns has the right to simultaneously get two girls pregnant. It is not as if I can stop him, or would wish to get physically involved in their sordid pseudo-relationships.

Am a trolling about troilism?

If I really have gone off-topic by daring to mention that God and Monogamy have something to do with VitalSigns' planned Marriage then no one has so far complained. Go ahead and abuse the Report button as you have threatened to do, it is sure evidence that you would rather (pathetically and unsuccessfully) try to intimidate me into suppressing my opinion rather than engage with me intellectually and persuade me out of my apparent wrongheadedness ;-)

...but it seems you are not capable of that.

 

[NoNameMcgee]

snip

People want to get married for different reasons, it's none of your business and also nothing to do with the point of the thread. I'm an athiest and also would like to get married.

You're trolling about trolling???? It seems to me like it's you who's starting it in this situation. Your comments here are much worse than anything i've read from anyone else.

You just made a big post dictating something that is completely irrevelant, now shall we get back on topic peoples?

 

[Uncompetative]

snip

People want to get married for different reasons, it's none of your business and also nothing to do with the point of the thread. I'm an athiest and also would like to get married.

You're trolling about trolling???? It seems to me like it's you who's starting it in this situation. Your comments here are much worse than anything i've read from anyone else.

You just made a big post dictating something that is completely irrevelant, now shall we get back on topic peoples?

VitalSigns made it my business when he entitled this post:

Poll: Looking for real advice not moral zealots

rather than, say...

Poll: 3-way, but there's a catch

with the actual Poll being:

Should I potentially jeopardize my Engagement and future Marriage by participating in a consensual 3-way with a girl who has confessed that she has romantic feelings for me and I have said I have for her (although, I'm keeping this a secret from my Fiancee)?

Are you kidding? Of course! ____________________[][][][][][][][][][][]

Not worth possibly causing_____________________[][][][][][][][][][][][][][]
a lot of drama

Wing it... ___________________________________[][][][][]

Why the fuck are you even getting married? ________[]
It is meant to be about monogamy, dipshit

 

[NoNameMcgee]

snip

I agree that he shouldn't be having the threesome, and I also said he should reconsider getting married not because of the threesome itself but because he's willing to jeopardize things with his fiancee for the sake of the threesome. (As in this case, the other girl loves him and he hasn't told his fiancee).

But you're bringing up the morality of getting married and what marriage is supposed to mean etc etc, which really has nothing to do with the thread and is exactly what he said he doesn't want to hear at the start of the thread and in the title itself, so just leave it, you're derailing things!

Also, you called his fiancee a slut for no reason other than because you wanted to be a major dick, and because you can without consequences thanks to the wonderful barrier of anonymity and safety that is the internet. Which makes me want to punch you, to be honest.

 

[Uncompetative]

I agree that he shouldn't be having the threesome, and I also said he should reconsider getting married not because of the threesome itself but because he's willing to jeopardize things with his fiancee for the sake of the threesome. (As in this case, the other girl loves him and he hasn't told his fiancee).

But you're bringing up the morality of getting married and what marriage is supposed to mean etc etc, which really has nothing to do with the thread and is exactly what he said he doesn't want to hear at the start of the thread and in the title itself, so just leave it, you're derailing things!

Also, you called his fiancee a slut for no reason other than because you wanted to be a major dick, and because you can without consequences thanks to the wonderful barrier of anonymity and safety that is the internet. Which makes me want to punch you, to be honest.

I think you are under the mistaken impression that I haven't actually given any 'real' advice (i.e. answered his Should I do it? question).

Go ahead with the sexual adventure you so desperately want permission to have, but don't get married. Your attitude renders it meaningless.

I don't consider myself excluded from the thread because "I know myself to be a moral zealot' as an actual moral zealot would condemn his eternal soul, tell him that all three of them were going to Hell, blah-de-blah... and as an Atheist, I don't believe in any of that.

If monogamy is not a part of Marriage, then why marry?

I've asked him this and so far I haven't received an explanation. Since then I have amused myself by mocking his braggadocio.

If you review the tone of VitalSigns posts on the anticipated "encounter" and his offhand I'll-get-over-it attitude to the very real possibility of a break-up then you may come around to see that it is VitalSigns that is wanting to be seen as a "major dick":

Oh yeah.

Go ahead and jeopardize your marriage over a sexual experience that will most likely be awkward and embarrassing.

I would like to remind everyone that my girlfriend Did say she was cool with this, granted she doesn't know the other girl has such feelings. I think this really boils down to is our friend (the other girl) going to take this for more than it is.

NOTE*** I'm confident enough to believe this wont be either awkward or embarrassing. I don't know what self esteem issues you have, but I admire my prowess so to speak.

 

[lizards]

Do it and post pics.

I agree with this guy.

this message is approved and supported by me

is it cheating on my girl that i still want to see the other 2 chicks?