Poll: Poll: is the word "rape" okay to use?

[Paksenarrion]

Um, no. I don't think it's that big a deal.

Now I'm sure some people have been severely traumatised by actual rape...

(And I think I was technically raped last week... I have some sense of how traumatic it can be even when it's not all-out violent assault.)

But still, I don't go around worrying about someone using the word in such a different context.

Wait a minute...first off, let's establish one thing: Are you okay?
Second, do you need an angry mob for anything?
Third: No, seriously, a few of us are imaginative when it comes to torture.
Fourth: So, you're okay, right?

Yeah, really. I'm fine.
I mean, I was a bit messed up for about two days.

But like I said, it's one of those technicalities that's very difficult to really wrap your head around.
Like, you've sort of agreed to something but what ends up happening crosses a line that you wouldn't actually have agreed to if you had known it was going to happen in advance.

I guess I'm a little conflicted about it because I know he would have stopped sooner if I'd actually let him know he was doing something I hadn't agreed to.

Eh. The more I think about it the more confusing it gets.

Hoo, boy...um...damn. You know what? I blame the sexualized media. Also, society. I'm going to stop right now before I start calling for the extermination of the entire human race.

So, them's the risks with casual encounters. Call me old fashioned, but I don't do casual encounters. The closest I've ever come to a casual encounter is posting bad erotic fan fiction, and that's just an entirely different can of worms.

I only have the regular spiel: Don't hesitate to stay "STOP" if you feel uncomfortable. Only engage in activities that require a safety word with someone you trust. Being on all fours is the most vulnerable position you can place yourself in. At least if you're facing each other you can do a quick palm strike through his chin. (I say "through" because you have to imagine penetrating past his chin and into his nasal cavity in order for the strike to be effective.)

But yeah...in all seriousness, make sure you trust the guy before you place yourself in a vulnerable situation.

 

[lacktheknack]

I wouldn't say it to my little sister...but I'm pretty sure most adults know about this little thing called CONTEXT.

Jesus Christ...no matter the word or phrase, ANYTHING can be offensive given the right context.

Being offended by something is as much the offendee's fault as it is the originator's.

This, although I dare you to make "fishy" or "innocent fluffy puppy" or even "ceiling" offensive.

 

[Torrasque]

Like some words, it can be taken out of context, or abused so its meaning is mistaken.
When online, I don't care what people say because I assume they are all idiots until proven otherwise, and everything they say is idiotic.
Trying not to get off topic, I'll just say using "rape" is fine just like saying "get fucking owned noob" or teabagging.
Offensive? Yes.
Are you going to go out of your way to tell everyone that does it, that they are offensive? Lol, I certainly hope not.

The only time I care about what someone says on the internets is when its on a medium where a certain degree of "Don't be a douchebag" is present.

I'd argue the present state of: gay/fag/every other homosexual term, should be questioned before "rape"

 

[ElTigreSantiago]

Snip.

Right on. Plus, "African American" doesn't apply to all black people. For example, Jamaicans. And I have heard many dumbasses use the term to describe ANY black person, regardless of weather they actually are Americans, simply because they don't want to call them "black". Also, I have found in life that "African American" makes things very awkward. They don't go around calling white people Caucasian for fuck sake.

And this pussifying society extends even more. Some people are offended by the words deaf, blind and other words describing physical disablilities FOR NO REASON.

 

[Spacelord]

It's a word.

A word.

God damn.

So you would openly go around spewing out words such as:

"I raped you!"
"******!"
"N*****!"

And other such words? No. You would never say such a word mainly because these words can be devastating to the wrong people. Not only could you be arrested for saying "rape" and having others misunderstand it, you could also lose your job, be thought of your peers as an asshole, never get a girlfriend/boyfriend and other such problems will continue to occur.

Stop trying to be "cool" and grow up.

I probably wouldn't use it in the company of actual rape victims. Everyone who is not a former rape victim and still takes offense is a hypersensitive PC jerkoff.

Not really. Us who actually use manners and such things on the internet (OMG SHOCKING I KNOW!) realize that just because you have "Anonymity" doesn't excuse you to go and act like an asshole to everyone on the internet. And also, nowadays there are some wonderful new advancements that could get you into all the trouble I had listed above. Just look at all the people who say or do certain things on Facebook (btw, it doesn't only happen on FB).


TL;DR - Manners people, use them.

Cool story bro.

As far as you know I haven't broken any social norm that the people I want to associate with maintains. Neither here nor anywhere else. Not everyone subscribes to your lofty standards for etiquette, internet or otherwise. Deal.

 

[gmaverick019_v1legacy]

So people don't like the word rape because it immediately associates with sexual assault for them? Well, for a start, land can be raped, wealth can be raped, and another thing, adjust to the vocabulary people use instead of whining about it.

dude simple linguistics shows its the most common use of the word, Land is usually pillaged (or stolen), wealth is usually robbed (thieved or nicked). And no certain things should be respected, just because we can do something doesnt mean we should. Thats just taking liberties for the sake of taking liberties

honestly..i would argue rape is used more by people meaning "owned" rather than raped.

now hypothetically, say there is an average 3 rapes per year per square mile.

i would easily argue that the word rape is used in gaming/owning/etc.. lingo more then 10,000 times within that year by different people per square mile.

now would you say rape is the most common usage for "being sexually assaulted" or "being owned/kick ass move or exploit"?

honestly i hardly ever hear anyone say "rape" about being sexually assaulted anymore.. if i do its usually on the news or something. and even then thats a once every 4-5 months.

if someone is around me and they hear me use it and ask me to stop using it nicely, then ill comply and not use the word around them, but however the world definitly needs to get with the times, language evolves all the time.

I wouldn't say it to my little sister...but I'm pretty sure most adults know about this little thing called CONTEXT.

Jesus Christ...no matter the word or phrase, ANYTHING can be offensive given the right context.

Being offended by something is as much the offendee's fault as it is the originator's.

This, although I dare you to make "fishy" or "innocent fluffy puppy" or even "ceiling" offensive.

well just make fishy the nickname for a super whale smelling vagina girl or make innocent fluffy puppy the nickname for a huge hardcore mma steroid dude and their ya go.

ceiling has me stumped.

but i would agree with both your posts.

 

[Torrasque]

Also, please remember that the more you disallow people from using 'questionable', 'obscene' or 'offensive' language, the more sensitive people will be towards it and thus the more you're adding to the pussification of society, something which I truly despise about our current culture and I see no way out if people keep making restrictions based on personal opinions/experiences.

Thats just taking liberties for the sake of taking liberties

I've never understood this saying. Does it mean I'm saying 'rape' in, say, WoW, during raids, only to spite people who have been raped?

I really like that first part.
If you think about it, that reasoning is why breasts in most 1st world cultures are seen as sexual objects and exposing them in public is seen as taboo. Why? Because it is, and thats the only reason why. Someone decided to cover them, and since they are covered, we want to see them more.
Words are definitely like that as well. Tell a child not to say X word, and they might not say it in your hearing, but will say it whenever you are not around because they get pleasure in saying something they're not allowed to say. Lol, I am still very much like this; when someone says "don't do this" I am immediately compelled to do it.

As for the second point I am quoting, I use rape in bgs and raids, but I never mean it in context of what it actually means.
The way I see it, when I say "they got raped", I mean to say "they got destroyed so utterly and had no chance of fighting back" which sounds REALLY REALLY bad? =/
Like most words in the English language, the words we use are rarely what they actually mean (take gay (meaning happy) or ****** (a bundle of sticks) for example)

 

[Savagezion]

I couldn't care less about what interjection a Mountain-Dew hyped nerd spews out over Ventrilo.

Seriously.

I couldn't care any less about it.

It doesn't matter what we should or shouldn't say, it's what we want to say. What we want to say hurts peoples' feelings sometimes.

That's a shame, firstly, that people take such things so seriously. It probably stems from actually having contact with a rape in some way or form. Which is still a shame.

But, your unfortunate event does not bar others from using the word rape. Shall I no longer use duct-tape because somebody was suffocated with it once in a movie?

No. I love duct tape.

Yes, but imagine you are walking down the street with a person who has been sexually assaulted and you guy are just talking away happily and you walk past a bunch of kids who say really stupid things about raping each other and the person you're with just starts crying because it reminds them of a horrible experience, people who say it doesn't matter are usually not the people the matter has affected, I suppose we cannot really understand how a sexually assault victim feels about it but it would be my guess that they would prefer you to not use the word anywhere near them. This is similar to the N word, when you use it you bring up unnecessary pain to a person,you instigate them and you're bringing up things everyone want's to forget and put behind them.

P.S. This is probably highly controversial but does having free speech make everything SO much better? What would seriously be the problem if you didn't have free speech and were not allowed to say really extreme words like c*n* and other specific ones I would not like to mention.

That isn't a problem with the kids that are using the word rape though. They are just the most comfortable place to point the finger. The real issue in that scenario is that the rape victim in that scenario still needs counseling. Rape is a word that exists and the odds of them hearing that word are more likely than the chances of them being raped again. In movies, books, escapist forum topics, etc. It will show up and even in the same context at times. The problem is with them and should be addressed towards them. Even a rape victim should be able to have this encounter and think to themselves "Those kids have no idea what they are promoting". But to brak down in tears and play the woe is me card means they have issues of some sort lingering around. It would be better to solve those issues than to point and blame the words as the source of this breakdown.

Yes, free speech does make everything better. As pointed out already as soon as you start banning words it starts a train reaction or domino effect on other ones. I remember growing up there were times I was not allowed to say "this sucks/stinks" or "Oh crap" and so on. And not for whining but with the stressing that these were all "bad words". Some schools even still enforce this crap. My neice says "barnacles" and "tarter sauce" (thanks to SponeBob) which could respectively be substituted for shit and fuck when used in context. But should she now not be allowed to use these words? It is the exact same thing as the above statement. Kids weren't allowed to say shit, so we deemed "crap" the substitute. If people started saying "I have to take a barnacle" would it be time to ban it then?

African American is a good example as well. It is free speech. You have the option whether to say a word or not. To tolerate it or not. But not to tell someone else they cannot say it. Everyone has the right to choose how they wish to communicate. Some just pick really poor and unexamined/unintelligent options. What makes something a "bad word"? Well, from what I have been told, it is because it is offensive. I have someone telling me what should be seen as offensive. I find THAT more offensive than any word can ever be.

 

[meticadpa]

In my opinion, it shouldn't be used like it is for the most part. Rape is one of the most heinous crimes a human being can commit, and likening beating someone in an online game to what is most likely the most traumatic and mentally damaging experience of a person's life just seems... wrong.

 

[Motiv_]

My personal opinion on the matter.

As the late George Carlin used to say, it's the context of the word that makes it offensive, funny, taboo, or stupid. Words on their own are just collections of letters, but it is the context that people use them in that define their meaning.

For example, let's take huge.

H-U-G-E

It can be used to define just about anything. Bread, Airplane, Man, they all can be placed with the word Huge. Huge can be used sarcastically, sincerely, exaggeratedly, and metrically, along with other uses.

You can take an E off of huge, and it makes hug. Which is a completely different word with a completely different meaning and set of uses. Just like you can take the word "Rape", take off an E, and make "Rap". Or remove the R and have "Ape". Whether or not the word is still okay to use depends on how you take it's context. Is it a juvenile word to use? Most certainly. But should it still be okay to use? I think so.

After all, if not then the 10 year olds of Xbox Live will just say "Fucked" instead or something along those lines.

 

[JUMBO PALACE]

Sure, have at it. I do.

 

[Syrus Vikeruce]

Why not just grow a pair and use it?

Everyone's too frickin' sensitive for my liking.

 

[JUMBO PALACE]

Can someone tell me why the third guy to reply was put on probation for his post? All it says is 'yes'. Surely the whole point of this topic in the first place is to get different peoples' views on this question, rather than to silence people with one opinion?

One word replies are frowned upon here on The Escapist. The mods want you to stimulate discussion and contribute rather than just saying yes or no.

 

[Yureina]

It disturbs me personally. I don't think it is ok because turning something very serious and horrible into a trivial passing remark isn't right to me.

 

[SmilingKitsune]

Rape is a disgusting thing, and I don't think the word should be used in such a context.
And honestly, people saying things like "OMG I just raped at that game" come off sounding like morons.