Tryzon?s Nostalgic Gaming Trips
4th March 2010 Special Edition!
Tryzon?s Top 10 PS2 games in the cosmos, and more junk besides
Prologue
My comrades know very well just how obsessed with collecting and enjoying games I am. While they?re out having girlfriends, jobs and bright futures, I sit at home in the dark and explore worlds of unimaginable wonder, all the while with a bottle of Coke and a cuppa within reach. Some might say ?not groundlessly- that I live a sorry existence, but I would disagree, citing my typically happy demeanour and enthusiasm in organising my treasures as evidence in support of my lifestyle.
But while I glean entertainment aplenty from my Saturn, Dreamcast, Nintendo 64, Game Boy Advance SP, Xbox, PlayStation 3, Wii, and multiple PCs, one system in particular has remained my personal favourite from the moment it first arrived in my residence. I own both the original ?Fat? model and the later ?Slimline? one, but both are equally beloved.
I speak, naturally, of the timeless, reliable, convenient, varied and nigh-on perfect PlayStation 2. Though the least powerful (successful) console of its age, the PS2 outsold its competitors several times over, relying on exclusives and superior controls rather than shiny graphics or an excessive focus on online multiplayer to appease the masses. For six or seven years it was almost uncontested in popularity, and only the arrival of newer, pricier and ?better? systems caused any significant drop in use.
Follow me on a journey through happiness unparalleled as I discuss in my opinionated way the birth, fermentation and slow decline of a living legend.
As a huge PS2 fan, I obviously have a bias towards it (as my over two hundred-strong army of PS2 games also suggests), and a lot of this is semi-exaggerated rambling from someone with too much love to give. And definitely don?t assume that my playful teasing of other systems that I personally see as being lesser is genuine hate talk. I adore every system I own, but everyone has a favourite, and the PS2 is mine. Besides, there?s only one way to play Halo, and only one way to play Rogue Squadron 2, eh?
This GIGANTIC Special Edition of Tryzon?s Nostalgic Gaming Trips is extremely self-serving, and was never intended to be read all the way through. Attempt it by all means, but don?t say I didn?t warn you. Just scroll down to the Top 10 and I?ll be happy.
A brief(ish) history of PS2 from some bloke?s perspective
The original PlayStation was a thing of beauty, and a success story that defied all expectations: CDs had never been a profitable medium for consoles before, despite several attempts; the manufacturer was a newcomer to the industry with no established consumer loyalty and the competing systems were made by companies with years of experience and massive groups of faithful customers. And yet somehow that little grey box, with its long loading times, two controller ports as standard, no mascots to use as crutches, initially questionable build quality and a name that rhymed with ?gay penetration? turned around and became the market leader by a giant gap, destroying what hope the Saturn had of being the first famous CD system and leaving Nintendo in second for the first time to date.
Only something special could top the likes of the PS1, and the cunningly named (or perhaps not) PS2 was just that. Starting off by notoriously obliterating a cult favourite- the Dreamcast- within a year or so, the PS2 is the catalyst for an interesting ?what if?? question, specifically ?what if the Dreamcast had survived to have a fair chance at life?? Well, we?d all be playing SoulCalibur anyway like we are now, but there would also be another shining star in the sky, comparable in size to the PS2?s all-devouring supernova. As it is, the Dreamcast remains the world?s favourite machine that didn?t quite crunch enough numbers, and is easily the greatest tragedy in gaming at the time of writing.
But if you ignore the fact that its throne was fashioned from cannibalised Dreamcast components, the PS2 was marvellous right out of the box. Though there have been better launch line-ups overall, anything that arrives with a copy of the original TimeSplitters is automatically amazing in my book, but you weren?t just stuck with that, oh no. There was Dynasty Warriors 2, Ready 2 Rumble Boxing, Smuggler?s Run, Tekken Tag Tournament, Fantavision and quite a few others, of all different genres and flavours. Shooters, Fighters, Puzzlers and Racers fresh from the box? Choice was the name of the game.
Not long after, now famous series such as Devil May Cry, Burnout and Grand Theft Auto made their debut, and developers who once flew the flag of Dreamcast flocked to the big black obelisk in a fashion which resembled spontaneous inter-continental migration. But you also got the lesser-known gems sliding their way in early on, like Zone of the Enders and Kessen. Even some big-name titles like Star Wars: Starfighter have since sunk away from the public eye, but provide as much fun now as ever.
After the launch of hopeful Microsoft?s Xbox and vengeful Nintendo?s GameCube, the monopoly became a mere one-sided fight, and not even the excellent releases for those systems could slow the truly monumental growth of history?s soon-to-be best selling games console.
The PS2?s relative ease of programming and colossal market made it a favourite for developers, and most of the more experimental games of the time were PS2-based. Sony?s own Ico often tops lists of highly underrated games, being brilliant but a commercial flop, and Namco?s Katamari Damacy is among the most stupidly clever ideas for anything ever in all media. And who couldn?t love a game where you play as a dog and piss on the postman? Though never quite reaching the levels of strange genius achieved by some of Sega?s Dreamcast greats ChuChu Rocket or The Typing of the Dead, the PS2 was not absent of ?out there? games by any means.
Continuations of famous PS1 series like Metal Gear Solid and Final Fantasy kept the fanboys under control, mostly, although they?re never totally satisfied, of course. You know exactly what I mean by that in the context of MGS specifically.
By middle-age the PS2 had established itself as the lesser-powered but better-stocked system of its age, and silenced the graphics whores by frequently pointing out that fun beats pretty pictures in 10 out of 10 laboratory tests, before throwing them a relatively pretty game to drool over, all the while rolling its mechanical eyes in disbelief of their vanity.
A number of truly outstanding exclusives began emerging which not only proved titanically entertaining, but as a bonus demonstrated beyond doubt that the PS2 was capable of all the important things that its competition were. Visuals didn?t count, and still don?t. Shadow of the Colossus followed Ico?s genre-busting example but was actually a big payday for its creators, probably because they actually bothered telling people that it was good, unlike the last game. God of War pushed the black box to its limits in every department, and ended up as the most epic title of recent years. Perhaps the only thing that was never definitively the best of its kind on PS2 was the FPS, but I have a technicality in mind which I?ll keep a secret until later.
Most titles today are multi-platform to maximise profits, and the PS2?s generation was much the same. The Xbox version of something would typically be the most graphically impressive and have the most dedicated online service, the GameCube one would usually be a fence sitter, although some ?naughty? games were censored to make them fit Nintendo?s family-friendly vibe. Remember Hitman 2 on GameCube? It was a tainted experience. But with a good few significant exceptions (not loads, though) the PS2 version of something would compensate for whatever inadequacies it had through the implementation of that mastery of controller design, the DualShock 2. When it comes to controllers, the DualShock 2 and Sega Saturn Model 2 pad top the charts of quality with impressive and deserved regularity, although the Xbox and GameCube certainly had their own great user input devices, just not quite of the same calibre.
My philosophy of controls over graphics puzzles some ignorant folk, but is the only true path to eternal bliss, and the purist?s choice. The simple fact is that for someone like myself who cares not for glistening textures and animations, the PS2 version of a title is very likely to best the definitive one.
And I?m well aware of the conspiracy about Sony?s coping of the SNES controller?s style for the original PlayStation pad. Yes, the resemblance is a little too significant to ignore, but there?s no shame in taking someone else?s idea if you can make it even better, I say. And remember the N64 controller? Though it gets the job done, it seems like a backwards step. Besides, we all know the Mega Drive had the best controller of its time.
With the expensive and sequel-ridden machines of the 7th generation now well seeded in the market these days, the trusty PS2 is becoming ever more neglected. Though it was fortunate enough to continue getting quality titles, and even recently got one last Jak game, I must tragically inform you that there?s probably not even two years? worth of life left in the old girl, judging by the shift in focus to either HD or motion control, neither of which can hope to achieve what the PS2 has. Make no mistake, PS2 is here to stay for some time, but new games for the thing are just becoming ever fewer. That?s a tragedy not too far away from Dreamcast levels of sadness. The PS2 has hosted some of the best titles ever made, and this brings me nicely to the next topic?
My pick for the Top 10 PS2 games
Before we get started, let?s establish some ground rules for this list:
1) They?re in no order other than alphabetical, since I could never tell you 100% which is the ultimate one.
2) I forced myself to pick one game per franchise, with the exception of something that?s completely different from its brethren, but there aren?t too many of those in a sequel-driven industry.
3) If you have a problem with my list, bear in mind that my opinion is my opinion, and that if I haven?t played something, I can?t tell you how good it is. Common sense, but people forget these things.
4) Every single one of these games is an essential purchase, and unless stated otherwise is probably cheap as chips to boot. That?s just the most recent fantastic thing about PS2 gaming: prices have plummeted, leaving me and others not bewitched by HD to snatch up some ridiculous bargains.
5) Some of these games will probably never be properly reviewed by yours truly, most likely because they?re either very well known or so huge that a comprehensive analysis would be impossible. For these games I?ve gone into a bit more detail, aware that I won?t get another chance to describe them.
6) Finally, just enjoy being reminded of some classics you might not have played in some time, and make whatever constructive criticism you desire.
Now let?s get going!
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Burnout 3: Takedown
2004
Before Takedown I had played a few racers, but none that really got my engine revving. I used to like Moto Racer on PC quite a bit, and kart racers like Lego Racers proved diverting, but nothing that could be called a ?proper? driving game caught my attention. But then I played a certain demo for a certain Criterion title, and instantly wanted more. So I got it, and boy howdy if I wasn?t given a kick up the rear. In a good way.
The ludicrous speed, constant narrow evasions of death, stylised presentation and general disregard for international road safety laws was nothing new to the series, but one feature changed everything, and they even put it in the title. The first time you careen through traffic so quickly that speed cameras might not even spot you and ram a similarly fast car so that it turns into a crumpled mass of metal and glass before being launched into the air and crashing down to Earth in a shower of sparks, probably onto another vehicle, you. Will. Be. HOOKED.
The joy of winning a race untouched after killing everyone else (although they do mysteriously survive and teleport back in) is immeasurable.
The Crash mode is also a thing of brutal genius. Drive up a ramp into a line of traffic and guide your wreck into buses, lorries, explosives and multipliers to get the highest score possible. Points are given depending on how much misery you?ve brought the tax payer, and the addiction of planning the perfect run for each stage is untreatable. The only cure? Finish every single one!
Collecting all the cars will take an extremely long time and nerves of adamantium. I could never win the hardest events in a million years, but just getting as far as I did was impossibly invigorating.
Even with the horrendous modern rock soundtrack typical of Burnout, absolutely hellish later levels and surprisingly tame multiplayer, Takedown is almost certainly my favourite racer to date, and much more interesting than the hyper-real Gran Turismo without also going overly cartoonish with its madness. In short? Yep, it has its moments.
Dragon Quest: The Journey of the Cursed King
2006
I wasn?t originally going to have Dragon Quest in this list, but then it occurred to me that try as I might, I couldn?t think of a fully-fledged PS2 RPG that I enjoyed as consistently or thoroughly. Final Fantasy X is the close second, but there?s something about Dragon Quest?s sheer simplicity and almost defiantly retro style that I just love. It?s your basic turn-based affair, in which you amass a team of four heroes who go about ridding the world of evil. Marvelous. They play the old trick of having the main character be completely mute, so that they seem more like ?you? and less like someone you?re watching. Of course, this might work better if the plot wasn?t dead simple ?stop the evil wizard!? stuff, but somehow the lack of complexity feels right. I called mine ?Smeghead?, inevitably.
Random encounters, frequent cutscenes, nice music, earn cash to purchase better equipment, go through big dungeons in search of treasure and find bosses at the end?all of this we?ve seen before, but for whatever reason Dragon Quest is just riveting. And it?s long, too, easily soaking up scores of hours from my life that I?ll never see again, nor do I want to.
In FFX there were a number of characters to choose from, but you could only have so many in battle, and this forced you to pick your fighters wisely. While I enjoy this format, I prefer Dragon Quest?s system of four people you?re stuck with and come to know their strengths and weaknesses over time.
But you also have the extra, semi-hidden stuff, like the Monster Arena, where you use special captured creatures to fight other teams of the same thing, earning big prizes as you go. You?ll need one hell of a team to get the grand prize. Seriously.
And the presentation is lovely: there?s an orchestral soundtrack that sounds very alien for the medium (but certainly not bad), voicework far beyond the off-time translation seen in FFX and very pretty cell-shaded visuals drawn by the same bloke responsible for Dragon Ball Z, complete with giant hair when you power your hero up. There?s nothing quite so classic-sounding and appropriately happy as the timeless Victory Fanfare, but it does the best that can be expected. The variety of enemies is astounding, and half the fun of exploring is finding out what insane freak of nature will attack you next. They just keep getting weirder and weirder, too.
I can?t really explain why Dragon Quest is so enthralling, but it simply is. I didn?t even mind replaying half of it after I made a silly memory card mistake, since it gave me the power of hindsight and allowed me to level up my characters more effectively. It?s sad that none of the previous Dragon Quests reached the shores of Britannia, and the only ones released since number eight are on DS, a system I haven?t got round to owning yet. Still, Dragon Quest on the move? A delightful concept, except I never play games while in transit, so the tiny screen just annoys me. Plus, I place touch screens in the same pile as motion control: briefly diverting, but a big limitation in the long run.
But I?m getting off track again. The Journey of the Cursed King is an inexplicably great RPG from people who?ve been making similar titles for over twenty years, so clearly they know what they?re doing. If you like your RPGs turn-based and with a pinch of retro like I do, say hello to your new best friend. You can also play it one-handed because of the turn-based style. Play Dragon Quest with the right, sip tea contently with the left. Ah, bliss.
God of War II
2007
The first GOW was more epic than gaming has seen in years, and introduced the angriest man in gaming: Kratos. Supposedly the reason we don?t have gorgons, cyclops or anything similar these days is because this maniac killed them all, and after half an hour of play, you?ll believe that story whole-heartedly. But even considering the original?s almost perfect combat, satisfying puzzles, wonderfully bloody retelling of ancient myths and twisted sense of humour, it still seemed limited to me. Part of this came from the fact that two thirds of the game took place inside a single big building, and another came from the strange decision to have a few brilliant boss battles spread hours apart, when a couple more would have given the experience better pacing. It needed something more to truly create the ultimate adventure.
God of War II is the definitive sequel. It does exactly what a follow-up should: more of the same with added weapons, enemies, levels and whatever issues from before ironed out. The entire game is spent on the move, and boss battles crop up at the end of every major section, while the puzzling still sneaks its way in when appropriate, only now the payoff for figuring something out is even better. One sequence with mountain-sized horses springs to mind.
The game is also considerably longer than before, unlike most sequels which just compact everything. The brutal violence and incredible exploring just goes on and on and on, although when the climax draws near, you?ll feel not only ready for an ending, but also like you?ve accomplished something. Plus the epic just goes up and up and up, never slowing down for a minute. It feels like an over-inflated balloon that should logically have popped hours ago but just continues to expand regardless of physics.
GOW II is exactly what the PS2 needed before mainstream attention shifted to the systems of tomorrow: a colossal gem of a game which just dares you to find fault. Frankly, I can?t. Well, perhaps I never quite got the same sense of gobsmacked awe as when I first saw that tower-high hydra emerge from the raging seas, but that would be tough to beat. This game does for the action adventure genre what another game in this list beginning with T does for first person shooters, and I cannot its their praises enough.
Ah, I almost forgot: please *don?t* get the God of War Collection instead of the PS2 versions unless for some reason you can?t play PS2 games on something. Why? Because the original versions are not only cheaper, but better, since they have a superior controller being used. A marginal graphical increase (although apparently the jaw-dropping cutscenes actually look worse, oddly) isn?t worth inferior input, and then you take price into consideration and it just seems like common sense. I have God of War on PS2 as nature intended, and I?m going to keep it like that until further notice. Re-releasing a game less than three years old for the same brand of systems? Insanity!
Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas
2004
A game that needs no introduction, since there are probably more people in the world who have played it than haven?t. This holds the distinction of being the last full title (the ?Stories? games don?t count) in the series that was a true improvement over the last game in nearly every respect. To put it simply, San Andreas is a *much* better game than GTA4. Right now some of you are making stabbing motions at the screen, spewing obscenities and defending GTA4 as a masterpiece and the greatest game of 2008. My reaction is to ask, ?have you *ever* played another GTA?? Vice City is a better game than GTA4, but San Andreas is just a bit better still than that.
By what logic do I say these things? Well while it?s probably true that GTA4 has a better story than any earlier instalments, the fun factor took a severe hit. Miniguns, flamethrowers, car-surfing, planes, good vehicle handling, the jetpack, consistently funny script, all of it is absent from the latest and ?greatest? Grand Theft Auto. I applaud Rockstar for trying something new and not just making the same game again, but who plays GTA to do anything but viciously murder random people and drive a golf cart through a shopping centre? Play The Getaway if you want a gripping gang story, people! And I don?t even particularly like The Getaway.
But now let?s explain why San Andreas is my favourite Grand Theft Auto, and probably will be for some time given that Rockstar are sticking with the moody style for now. Alright, the map is overly large and empty in places, glitches run rampant and the move from 80s awesomeness to 90s hip hop was a bad idea, but in almost every other respect San Andreas is absolutely brilliant. Turn on flying cars, spawn a Rhino (another absentee from GTA4) and take yourself to a world of chaotic bliss. Gotta love a good oxymoron.
The aiming system is still fiddly, the lack of checkpoints or quick mission retries is heinous, the stupid RPG stat-building is unnecessary, and the occasional bad bug can be irritating, but as a source of mindless violence there?s nothing better in the entirety of mankind?s creation. And it only gets better with a friend?
A surprisingly brilliant feature is the 2-player free-for-all mode, which lets you plug in another DualShock and go mental with a mate. Trying to fly a one-seater aeroplane with someone else perched on top throwing Molotovs in a manner more likely to kill both of you than anyone else is one of gaming?s simple pleasures. And just wait until you find the Player 1 katana decapitation glitch. It?s priceless.
If there?s one way that San Andreas is inferior to Vice City, it?s the setting. 80s Miami has the fashion, vehicles and soundtrack (?Everybody?s working for the weekend, yeeeaaaaaaaaaahh!?) that cannot be beaten, even if you can?t swim.
If you?re one of the miniscule number of people to have not played San Andreas, it?s stupidly cheap for PS2, and can be found on Xbox Live for download at a reasonable price. What a bargain, indeed. And if you feel that the lack of 80s rock is depressing, cheer yourself up by dressing CJ like Mr. T and pimping out a van. That?s a guaranteed pick-me-up.
If you need a worthy successor to San Andreas on a 7th gen system, then I highly recommend the gloriously loopy Saints Row 2, which is genuinely about as good as San Andreas, and possibly even better. It has more 80s music, but no local co-op, so it?s a close call. Buy both like I did; it?s the only sensible option.
Hitman: Blood Money
2006
The Hitman series has always been something of an underground affair: the games sell alright and a lot of folk know about it, but it?s not a household name and doesn?t get all the appreciation it deserves. I?ve always been interested why nobody has really tried to copy the basic concept in almost ten years, and the only explanation is that it?s not the easiest thing to get right.
For the ignorant among you, in Hitman you play as the bald and suave Agent 47, a cloned assassin who goes around the world killing people using disguises, trickery and the occasional chunk of high explosives, usually for the money but sometimes for personal reasons. Or perhaps he just has murderous impulses. Don?t we all, at some point?
Though there?s no official need to do things cleverly, the greatest pleasure that comes from playing any Hitman game is when you can complete a level with no alarms, no dead people other than your targets and with no witnesses telling tales of the shiny-headed man with twin Silverballers. Doing this on some levels will require the patience of three saints, but once you?ve done it, you?ll be hooked.
Hitman has yet to change the basic formula, and I hope it never does. Blood Money remains the most significantly different title of the series, implementing a new camera system, the ability to upgrade your gear, various new moves such as pushing people over ledges, and the opportunity to make deaths look like accidents. Hugely coincidental accidents perhaps, but accidents none the less. Seeing your handiwork described with eerie detail in a newspaper article following a successful mission (including a suspect sketch of varying accuracy) is such a simple idea and yet extremely cool.
I almost think of Agent 47 as an evil James Bond, travelling the globe in style and icing people without breaking a sweat. You even get paid extra for leaving a mission while wearing your original suit. He has almost no personality, and other than a few hints at not enjoying his work, keeps to himself. You don?t grow attached to him particularly, but there?s something about his classy attire and indifferent attitude that makes him likeable on some unidentifiable level.
Blood Money is almost as strange as Contracts at times, and Contracts had a level set in an abattoir hosting a gimp party in which you had to kill an extremely obese Scotsman (who can?t even get up off the bed, he?s so plump) by hiding a gun in a roast chicken. Blood Money never gets that odd, but disguising yourself as a bird to assassinate a few similarly-dressed competing killers, who can only be tracked by listening to their suggestive walkie-talkie chatter? That?s definitely silly, but awesome in its own way.
Much of any Hitman game is spent walking slowly around to avoid looking suspicious, and while this can be tedious at times, shuffling down a corridor knowing that one false move could blow your cover is cool as ice. Plus it?s all helped tremendously by the music, courtesy of the always phenomenal Jesper Kyd. Haunting, catchy, and powerful, Hitman has some of the most consistently amazing soundtracks ever, and Blood Money is no exception. Orchestras with plenty of booming drums and scarily ghost-like choirs send shivers down my spine to this day. I heartily recommend finding some of Kyd?s work, even if you don?t like Hitman.
On that subject, most people who don?t like Hitman complain about the A.I. being either clueless or ridiculously easy to alert, with the two extremes occurring at random. It?s true that there are more than a few moments where a seemingly innocent act caught someone?s attention, and just as many times where blatant murder went un-investigated. But to me it?s never been a big problem, and the ability to save anywhere, anywhen (but only so many times) alleviates most of the frustration.
Hitman is also very slow to get into, and approaching it like any other game will result in either boredom, Game Over or both. Though you can just run and gun through most of the game, it was never created for this and there?s little enjoyment to be had. Plus it?s hard, further discouraging Rambo tactics.
Blood Money is my favourite Hitman to date, but if you never liked the other games, you won?t like this ?un. It?s one of the best stealth-focused games I?ve ever played, and handles like almost nothing else. If you?re a fan of previous instalments, this is the cream of the crop. If you enjoy things that move like milk floats, and you?re prepared for a new experience, give it a go. It?s dead fun.
Jak 3
2004
I had to sit down and think really, really hard about this: which is better, Jak 2 or 3? Jak 2 has the better plot (not that it?s amazing, mind you) and feels more?refined than its follow-up, but Jak 3 lessened the annoying movement between locations, added more variety in the gameplay, included some very fun desert vehicles and made Dark Jak a bit less crap. Then again, Jak 3 is overly easy, mainly because the inclusion of Light Jak lets one heal anywhere with plenty of light eco to refuel that ability.
After much deliberation I almost decided to give both games a tied spot on the list, especially since they do compliment eachother quite well. But I soon put a stop to that train of thought, since this is supposed to be my super-duper ultimate list of best games for PS2, and I had to keep things concise. If I let there be one exception, loads of other tricky decisions would end in compromises. No, there can be only one, and Jak 3 is that one. Sean Connery demands it be so.
Now many of you are probably thinking that the original Jak and Daxter: The Precursor Legacy is the superior instalment in the franchise, and you?re free to do so. I too like the awkwardly-named one very much, but I think that the series got particularly good once guns became involved. That sounds bad, but what I mean is that the weapons allow for another layer of fun and?I hate to say ?tactics?, but it?s basically that. Running in, kicking something in the face before unloading your yellow gun (that?s what I always called it) into the next foe along is never tiresome, and whereas you got most weapons near the beginning of Jak 2, Jak 3 constantly gives you new toys to kill things with, and you can even upgrade them by finding and spending precursor orbs.
The driving in the desert makes for truly intense chases, and one segment very near the end may be irritating, but it?s also enjoyable as hell. Haven City makes a return from the previous game, but it?s much smaller now and there aren?t nearly so many occasions in which it?s necessary to move the entire map?s length just to start one mission, which is incidentally likely to send you all the way back.
There is still the occasional problem with unforgiving sections which go half an hour without a checkpoint, but as mentioned the Light Jak healing ability means it?s hard to die through combat anyway.
The story became forgettable around here, and even resorted to the ultimate no-no of ?I am your father?, which to this day invokes either laughter or disappointed head-shaking from me.
But get around the story and you?ll find an action-packed ride across a desert and through a city-turned-warzone, filled with passable humour, excellent platforming and many crazy ideas. You should buy Jak 2 first, of course, but beware the utterly random difficulty curve, I can tell you.
Metal Gear Solid 3: Snake Eater
2005
A surprising departure from the previous game, the impossibly suggestive name distracted from what was a slow-to-start but ultimately engrossing stealth-?em-up. For as long as an hour or so when first playing you?ll probably be very confused if you?ve played the earlier Solids. For example, in MGS2 there was basically no footstep noise, so you could just run around to your heart?s content whenever the enemy turned their back, so long as there was no sheet metal or broken glass on the floor. In MGS3 moving too quickly on any surface makes noise, but doing so on soil is quieter than in long grass, say. Also, whereas in MGS2 if an enemy looks at you, you?re spotted, MGS3 centres around the concept of camouflage and being right next to a guard without his knowing. It?s more like Splinter Cell?s focus on hiding in shadows, and just like Splinter Cell you feel hugely vulnerable when not hidden properly.
Through an inconvenient menu (you get used to it) you change Snake?s uniform to match his surroundings as well as possible, although there are some surfaces that just can?t be properly blended against. As mentioned, unless you?re concealed well and at least vaguely aware of the enemy?s position, the panic will set in and you?re more likely to make stupid mistakes, such as grabbing one bloke only to realise that his mate with a radio was standing just behind a tree.
The lack of radar is a crucial difference, too: the only means of determining where opponents are artificially is using some of your 60s gadgets. The best one (sonar) makes an audible beep sound which travels worryingly far and alerts folk to your position, so I never found much use for that. The less precise but safer anti personnel sensor makes the DualShock throb more viciously depending on how nearby guards are. On a few occasions I thought I was alone, but upon activating the sensor realised by the rapid rumbling that someone was just off screen. Had I moved, I?d have been rumbled myself.
One of MGS2?s biggest problems for me was the sheer amount of techno babble in the cutscenes. Little did I know that MGS4 would be twice as bad for that, but I?m getting sidetracked. MGS3 benefits from being set it the communist-paranoid 60s, as the simpler technology means that story can be told somewhat quicker, and things drag a lot less. The parts about an international conspiracy and almost immeasurably large fortunes is actually very interesting to me, and I find myself rewatching those bits accidentally when replaying the game.
Snake Eater works best when you enter an area, assess the situation and then methodically kill or avoid people until you reach your goal. There?s no reason not to kill whenever possible, so a slit throat is generally more beneficial than a knock on the coconut. Me like.
The boss fights are also something special, particularly the one where you and a centenarian marksman engage in a prolonged sniper battle in a large, open jungle sector. Do the fight on the higher difficulties and death can be almost instant and come from nowhere, so sneaking about veeerry sllloooowwly and listening for the squawking of his parrot (err?yeah) is the best way to go. Of course, you could just save the game, set your PS2?s clock forward a few weeks and watch in amusement as you find the old man dead of old age. Underwhelming? Yes. Funny as Flibble? Oh yes.
Some people can?t get past the menu for camo changing (which really is awkward), or complain that it?s too different to the previous titles, but Snake Eater is my favourite Metal Gear Solid by some degree. The stealth can be absolutely teeth-chattering, plus it?s worth getting just to beat up Raiden?s poncey Russian ancestor.
The obscenely rich among you could and should purchase the Subsistence version of the game, which gives you various extras but most interestingly lets you have an MGS4-style rotating camera. It costs about twenty times as much here in the PAL region, but for the die-hard fan there?s no alternative. And you?ll make me supremely jealous, too, so consider that further incentive.
Splinter Cell: Chaos Theory
2005
I hate that they call these things ?Tom Clancy?s? this and that. You know what I do? I get a piece of paper and sellotape it over that part of the game?s title on the box?s spine. Sad, but necessary, since I insist on filing them under S.
But getting back on topic, Splinter Cell had me reeled in ever since I played a demo way back in 2003, and immediately discovered why the previously Xbox-exclusive original had been ported to my beloved PS2: because it?s almost unrivalled in terms of sneaking. Metal Gear Solid may be more famous and have a much richer history along with a celebrity designer in the form of Hideo Kojima, but Splinter Cell feels more like you?re supposed to be silent and stealthy. This was especially true before Metal Gear Solid 3 came out, because that was the first its series that I would call truly stealthy. But you already read about THAT masterpiece, didn?t you?
Like Hitman: Blood Money, Chaos Theory doesn?t change the series? basic gameplay style all that much, but finally fixes the issues that people had been complaining about since the first game. The strange almost glitch-like occurrence where any corpses left in the light would automatically trigger alarms ten minutes later, vindictively strict conditions for victory due to ?one alert and we?re pulling the plug? scenarios, and the rather fiddly melee attacks? All significant problems of yesteryear, because Chaos Theory took care of them and them some.
In my rant about Ubisoft and their tendency to take great franchises and make them inferior, I used Chaos Theory as a shining example of what the company can do at their peak, and it really is. Pandora Tomorrow felt like a big expansion pack more than anything, adding more annoying features than it removed at times. Plus pity the unlucky person who got the early GameCube release, as a certain section is almost irreparably bugged. How does junk like that get through playtesting? Me suspects there was little for the ?Cube port.
Sam Fisher is the grumpy old spy extraordinaire, same as ever, and thankfully still voiced by the wonderful Michael Ironside, who also had a big role in Total Recall, one of the best action movies ever made. Then again, the same man was also the antagonist in Highlander 2: The Quickening, an abomination of a sequel to one of the greatest fantasy adventure films ever made. What a career. And I am really getting sidetracked.
You?re now almost always free to maim and slaughter whoever the feck you want, and doing so is less stressful due to Sam?s new knife. The UK box art for Chaos Theory simply shows Sam staring thoughtfully at his blade, which glints and hungers for blood. It?s an appropriate choice, since the knife lets you kill quickly and (mostly) quietly, unlike the old thwack, thwack from before, which only knocked blokes out. A streamlined control setup also helps to prevent those moments I had a lot in which ?the controls killed me!? For example, holding down the button when meleeing makes Sam immediately start carrying his victim, rather than let them drop to the ground. If you?re in a hurry to stab, grab and scarper, this can be a life-saver. Then you?ve got the ?reverse neck-snap? and ?the creature from the black lagoon?, whose names I just made up on the spot, but are no less fun as a result.
Something surprisingly revolutionary is the sound meter. A companion to the good old light meter, it shows how much noise you?re making by moving about, whistling or shooting, and compares it to the level of background noise. If you?re in a noisy engine room, say, anything but the loudest sounds you make will be inaudible to the enemy. Doing the same thing in an echoey cave won?t go so unnoticed, however. Before the sound meter, there was no way to know how noisy you were being, and a guard would often turn around while being snuck up on because you were moving too quickly. Chaos Theory lets you know just how fast to go, and it feels less unfair that way.
But maybe most significant of all, at least on PS2, was the power to save anywhere and however often you like. Though I?d imagine that the PC games had allowed this from the start, and I have no clue about the Xbox or GameCube, for PS2 at least this was brand new and a huge relief. Certain bits in the first two games would rely on trial and error, and having a ten-minute gap between save points really didn?t help. Chaos Theory lets you save and continue whenever you want from the exact spot you got to, even if you turn the console off. It was nothing short of magical the first time after so many hours of repeating sections on autopilot just to get to a tricky part.
?Intriguing and cool, but flawed? sums up the new local co-op missions. These let you and a mate who shares your love of leather play through a good handful of original missions meant to occur alongside the main story. In many ways it?s better than the online spy vs. grunt action, since a friend next to you is always better than one talking through a fuzzy headset and getting cheap kills due to lag exploits. A common tactic is to lure out a dim sentry and then have your accomplice pounce on them. Co-op would be a great addition instead of just a good one, except that for whatever reason the A.I. is much worse than in the singleplayer. There were times when a guard would spot us from across the room in pitch blackness. The ever-present threat of psychic enemies means that you can never play naturally, and have to give them a wide birth in case their sixth sense detects you. It?s the Achilles heel of an otherwise outstanding mode that?s brilliant when played by two Splinter Cell veterans, but less so when one or more amateurs are involved.
Chaos Theory, Snake Eater and Blood Money are all the ultimate part of their respective series, and together make up my three favourite stealth games in the multiverse. If you?re fond of stealth but haven?t tried one or more of them, do so at once. If you have yet to be convinced that sneaking in games can work, give that trio a try. Then if you?re still not converted, chances are that you?ll always prefer TimeSplitters. Speaking of?
TimeSplitters 2
2002
Well this game?s appearance on the list should surprise nobody familiar with me or my reviews. First off, let?s get something straight: TimeSplitters: Future Perfect is the third game, and the one most people are familiar with. Though still a fantastic title, it was quite ?inspired? by the success of Halo and was made more mainstream to appeal to a similar audience. It seems simple enough, but due to the lack of a number in the third game?s title, a few very daft people think it?s the first game. Unbelievable, I know, but that?s how it is.
With that taken care of, how can I summarise TimeSplitters 2 in a few paragraphs? Well, it?s an FPS, as you might have gathered by the Halo comparisons, but that?s where the similarities end. TimeSplitters as a series stands for frantic, insane, fast-paced fun, with spoofs of everything from James Bond to Resident Evil. Monkeys, robots, zombies, tribal women and aliens, along with countless others, make up the vast array of playable characters, and you?re encouraged to mix them up randomly into teams and hurl them into battle armed with shotguns, rocket launchers and miniguns. It?s a thing to behold.
The shooting is without fault, I say, and the various weapons all feel so cartoonish and yet still powerful that entertainment is unpreventable. Headshots do more damage, but the ridiculous speed of proceedings mean there?s little time for accurate aiming, and stuff like camping and sniping really doesn?t work, since the maps are designed for close quarters explosive combat. So it?s pure anarchy, running about with wonderfully catchy music and gloriously over-the-top sound effects filling your ears like a sweet lullaby of death.
The first TimeSplitters was a PS2 launch title, as mentioned in the history section, and as such was rushed to release. As a result the single-player was extremely minimal, almost an afterthought. What was there, though, was some of the best split-screen multiplayer you?ve ever seen, and TimeSplitters 2 makes it better in every conceivable way, with expertly crafted maps, lovable characters, weapons that make me fall in love with the world whenever I fire one and a single-player that, while still not as great, was at least much more substantial and full of addictive challenge modes.
There?s no way I can do TimeSplitters 2 justice in such a small space, so let me just say that the entire TimeSplitters franchise was designed primarily by ex-Rare employees, who worked on the legendary Goldeneye 007. If you don?t know what that is, learn your history, it was only two generations ago. ?Splitters 2 has been my favourite shooter ever since I discovered it, and precious few others have come at all close to topping it, with none succeeding. A depressingly large amount of people don?t know about TimeSplitters at all, or prefer Future Perfect. The former group don?t know what they?re missing, and the latter are so close and yet so far from perfection. What can I say, except buy TimeSplitters 2 for either PS2, Xbox or GameCube. You shan?t be disappointed.
I said in the history section as well that while there were no definitive exclusive FPSs on PS2, I did have a technicality to bring up. Being the owner of both the PS2 and Xbox versions of TimeSplitters 2, I can confirm that the PS2 version has better controls, not to my surprise. As someone who?s played more ?Splitters than Halo, I prefer the DualShock to the Xbox controller, and I say that TimeSplitters 2 needs a DualShock to work properly. The only reason I can fathom as to why someone might get the Xbox version is to experience superior visuals, but I didn?t notice any significant improvement in that department, so graphics don?t come into this. Superior controls, or invisibly better graphics? Seems like an obvious choice. Plus the PS2 version is usually cheaper, so what more can I say to encourage that you purchase my favourite option? How about this:
TimeSplitters 2 is an orgasm that lasts a lifetime, and without it the world would be a much darker place.
Urban Chaos: Riot Response
2006
Like Dragon Quest, I nearly didn?t put this in my sacred list, but reconsidered. It?s my most recently acquired Top 10 game, and as such I thought that my opinion of it might lessen soon and ruin the validity of this whole Special Edition. Having not played the game for several months, I sat down with it again and planned on testing whether it deserved to be, as I claimed in my review of it, in my Top 5 favourite FPSs. A few days? worth of gaming later and I had finished it 100%, unlocking the infinite ammo portable minigun and claiming my well-earned title as ultimate badass copper. There could be no doubt any longer: Urban Chaos is outstanding.
Games with a sense of humour are getting ever less common, but Urban Chaos has just the kind of idiotic comedy to it that I just lap up, with its fire-starting taser and decapitating pistol. Even the enemies, despite always obscuring their faces with hockey masks, are so adorably insane that shooting them almost feels wrong. Or rather it might do, if the shooting wasn?t wonderfully powerful.
Play this game on Terror mode without the good upgrades and you?re in for Hell. Your magical shield, though impregnable, can only protect your front half and limits your manoeuvrability. So you?ll be fine in a narrow corridor, but in the middle of a courtyard you?re slightly more exposed. Headshots are some of the easiest to pull off ever and always fatal, but there?s often so much shrapnel flying that popping out from your shield can mean instant damage. So you have to time your shots and use whatever additional cover possible. Of course, the opposition eventually get their own shields, which complicates matters.
I revel in violence, and Urban Chaos delivers. It?s got Molotov cocktails, circular saws, multiple shotguns, the previously mentioned minigun and perhaps most deadly of all, the standard pistol. Almost as invaluable as the shield, it?s the good-all-rounder to end them all, until you unlock the Mk. IV that is, when it becomes almost one-shot kill, and resembles something that Judge Dredd would use. By that point, however, you will have already mastered the game and learned the tricks required to survive, such as the quick-fire technique I dubbed ?the Pop Shot?.
Despite my fears, Urban Chaos truly deserves a place on this list as much as anything else. It?s got style, incredible action and replay value aplenty, and is easily as good as almost any other shooter I?ve ever played. There?s a certain one which I discussed higher up the alphabet which is even better, but I don?t expect that to be rivalled for some time.
If you want to know where Modern Warfare 2 got the whole riot shield idea, Urban Chaos is available at criminally low prices and will make your PS2 want to strap on a bandana and shoot lead around the room wildly while letting loose a battle cry. The lack of arms may prove difficult, but as we all know, the PS2 is capable of anything. Except failure, of course.
*Honourable Mention*
Legacy of Kain: Soul Reaver
1999
I came very close to throwing the rule book on the fire and just putting Soul Reaver in the normal list, but eventually I grudgingly conceded that since it?s technically a PS1 game, ranking it alongside PS2 titles would not be sporting, and the Dreamcast version is arguably superior anyway. Having said that, I?ve never actually played Soul Reaver on a PS1, and the PS2 plays the game perfectly without any of the nasty emulation errors that a PS3 or 360 might give you for certain titles. And as for the Dreamcast thing, that?s less easily dismissed, but I learned to love Soul Reaver on PS2 years before even getting a ?cast, and so associate it far more with Sony?s 6th generation machine than Sega?s.
I?ve actually reviewed Soul Reaver twice, both for PlayStation and Dreamcast, so this should be kept brief. But how can I possibly ignore such a vamp-dustingly good adventure game? Over my dead body, that?s how.
As the re-resurrected (it?s complicated) Vampire-turned-Wraith Raziel, you must set out into the decaying shell of a once prosperous land to systematically murder your former brethren and then finally your sire, Kain, the one responsible for your being even more dead than before. That?s the footnotes for the plot, since Legacy of Kain is very possibly my favourite game story to date overall, once all five games are taken into account.
But what a newcomer needs to know is that you claw and kick vampires before finishing them off with fire, spikes, water or sunlight using a simple but satisfyingly visceral combat system. In between bouts of violence are clever puzzles which only sometimes require supernatural powers to figure out. And by the way, Raziel has supernatural powers.
I?m repeating myself hugely here, as you can imagine after two reviews of the same game. Just go and find those, if you can. Any Legacy fan will know about Soul Reaver all too well, but even if you don?t care to try any of the other lovely games in the saga, Soul Reaver cannot be done without. It is my favourite PS1 game by some degree, and only a few others on the platform come close.
It works in a PS2. This is my list. It?s staying.
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Could the PS2 be any better?
If someone asked me that question, my instinct would be to say no, and make rude comments regarding the person?s mother. But were I feeling more reasonable, I might ponder for some time before listing a few ways in which the perfect console could be made even more so.
First and foremost would be the system?s capabilities. And no, I don?t mean graphics, but rather how many objects can be made to exist simultaneously and such. More often than not this isn?t a problem, but every so often you get a title like Killzone. Now that?s a quality shooter right there, but it?s also probably the least technically stable game made by a first-party company in existence. The frequent framerate drops, pop-up, strange sound glitches and other inadequacies of that type are evidence of the poor PS2 being pushed too hard, and it?s tricky not to admit that the same game running on the Xbox would likely be far more consistent in terms of performance. This comes with the territory on PS2, and isn?t a particularly common issue, especially with stuff like God of War showing how much can be done without fault, but it?s a simple fact that the PS2?s hardware is the weakest of its time, not counting the ill-fated Dreamcast.
Secondly, why did such wonderful accessories as the G-Con 2 and Eyetoy go relatively underutilised? Alright, lightgun games have a rather strict formula that?s hard to change, and since the best Eyetoy experience (Wishi-Washi, of course!) came out right when the camera did, anything after would never be able to top it. But then again, Vampire Night is not quite House of the Dead, and we never did get any X-rated camera-related games?Missed opportunities, Sony.
Lastly, though the Slimline is more reliable, the original PS2 model shares some similarities with the original Nintendo, in that the design was competent but flawed. Sony apparently didn?t learn their lesson immediately with the PlayStation?s habit of developing disc-reading trouble, and allowed the little grey fella?s successor to have the same problem, only this time putting the console on its side wasn?t as likely to help afflicted machines. It?s probable that most of the surviving Fats have started getting picky about exactly when they?ll read what, and by that I don?t mean they have any concept of what?s a good or bad game. I?d love to see that actually: a PS2 which refused to play Turok: Evolution unless it was given a three-hour TimeSplitters session first. Optical media won?t ever be as sturdy as good old cartridges, but the laser which reads them can be easily broken itself. Even my trusty early 2002-bought PS2 can occasionally throw a fit about a certain game type, though ever since I smacked it in just the right spot it?s been more cooperative. That?s something the Slimline isn?t good for: hitting. The Fat is built like a concrete tank, not a papier-mâché butterfly.
Just remember: not even a diamond works in every situation, but that doesn?t take away from its delightful prettiness.
Conclusion: Why the PS2 will live on in myth and folklore long after the last unit has passed away
This concludes my long-winded celebration of all things PS2. The Noughties turned out to be quite a decade for gaming, and the PS2 was the shining star in its centre. It isn?t the most innovative system, or the most powerful, but what it was, is, and shall always be is an absolute hoot.
I like to imagine that most gamers have owned a PS2 at one point or another, and with endless millions sold that?s not far from the truth. Of course, in the last few years we?ve had otherwise intelligent people who know good from bad selling their beloved black box for the new models of machine with either a lack of choice, underwhelming exclusives, limited backwards compatibility or a bewilderingly popular new input method. I?m not against progress, but as a fan of RPGs I know to put my XP into the right slots to get the best long-term benefits, and the 7th generation?s focus on gimmickry and network play has done little but aggravate me.
With the once bountiful spring of new PS2 games drying up worryingly fast (why no James Cameron?s Avatar for us 6th generation junkies, eh, Ubisoft?), I worry about how much longer it?ll be until Sony pulls the plug on its greatest triumph to date, dodgy disc-readers and all. That date, whenever it is, will be one of mourning.
But you can help, comrades. If for some unimaginable reason you have never owned a PlayStation 2, they cost much less than any of the latest consoles and are, as you?d expect me to say, at least twice as good. Pick one up for yourself, and a few others as gifts for your loved folk, and spread the joy that only a PS2 can bring. Oh, how I envy anybody booting up TimeSplitters for the first time right now.
I sincerely doubt anyone will have read this the entire way through, but if you did, clearly you?re a lad (or lass) with impeccable taste in games and, dare I say, authors. It is devotees like you and I that will continue playing PS2 long after they?ve ceased to be valuable in mainstream society. It will be the 2600 or NES of its era, beloved and preserved by those who lived through its golden age. Even after the nuclear apocalypse has wiped out what we call humanity, irradiated freaks with twelve fingers on each hand will find a PS2 (since they?re made of the same stuff as flight recorders, I tell you). Alright they?ll have no clue what it?s for, and fragile disc-based media will have been annihilated as the bombs dropped, but even mutants will understand that the black cuboid is of extreme significance, and probably start worshipping it instead of that unexploded nuke which they were previously so fond of.
Perhaps that story went on too long, but its message is clear: the PS2 is an embodiment of joy, and if you?ve genuinely read this entire feature then you?ve clearly gone far too long without playing on your magic box. Off you go, now. Pop a few monkey skulls for me, and raise a pint (of Coke) in recognition of the gorgeous device which made such things possible. I thank you.
