Poll: Should I meet him?
- Thread starter Musclepunch
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Like everyone is saying, get him to do a video chat. There shouldn't be any reason for him not to. Also, if there is no changing your mind and you absolutely have to go met him, take your parents. If something goes wrong you will be glad they were there.
Yeah, clearly. I think you underestimate the capacity for predators to lie in wait with the fish on the line.MicrosoftPaysMe said:
OT, I'll join the crowd - attempt webcam, and if you do want to meet with the guy, for Pete's sake do it in a public place with your parent(s)/authority figure(s) at hand. There's something vaguely fishy about his issues with webcam, so be cautious.
On the other hand, it's really not uncommon for folks who learn English as a second/peripheral language to be exceptionally concerned about their accent - my folks are part of a Japanese homestay programme, and some of the girls we've had stay were adamant that their accents were shameful, and took a good deal of coaxing before they'd talk.
I think you misunderstand. That was the point I was making.Kragg said:
There's no women luring girls here, the other poster was trying to say that if an older woman meets a younger guy (what I'd done) it's ok and nothing to worry about, but the other way round (what the OP proposed) it simply must be paedophilia.
And I'm fairly sure woman on woman luring has happened somewhere.
ITT paranoid kids who are scared for their bums
unless you're gay, i don't see why you would want to go to norway to meet a guy, i have utter most confidence that the Norwegian is not a pedophile so go meet him.
unless you're gay, i don't see why you would want to go to norway to meet a guy, i have utter most confidence that the Norwegian is not a pedophile so go meet him.
And that is where my inner skeptic comes out... anyone can get fake photos and make a fake profile or facebook or whatever...Musclepunch said:
Early last year I started posting on a Big Bang Theory fan forum. While there, I started chatting to someone who claimed to be a young South African woman; she was 24, I was about to turn 27. We started talking over MSN/Yahoo, then Skype. She had a Facebook page with pictures, but I was a bit cautious about that - as people have said, photos can be faked.
Anyway, then she got a webcam and we started having video calls - and it turned out that she was in fact the young female she claimed to be, rather than the middle-aged truck driver from Hull I was slightly worried about.
Then she came up to the UK to meet me - and she brought her parents with her, a degree of caution I found curiously pleasing.
Oh yeah - now I'm in South Africa, spending a third of a year with her.
And she's now my wife.
EDIT: Oh yes, your question.
Ideally, I'd suggest waiting at least a year or two, and definitely insist on a webcam call first. Then when you do meet, do so with caution, and definitely bring your parents.
Anyway, then she got a webcam and we started having video calls - and it turned out that she was in fact the young female she claimed to be, rather than the middle-aged truck driver from Hull I was slightly worried about.
Then she came up to the UK to meet me - and she brought her parents with her, a degree of caution I found curiously pleasing.
Oh yeah - now I'm in South Africa, spending a third of a year with her.
And she's now my wife.
EDIT: Oh yes, your question.
Ideally, I'd suggest waiting at least a year or two, and definitely insist on a webcam call first. Then when you do meet, do so with caution, and definitely bring your parents.
Yeah, and don't trust him if he talks about cats either.Dags90 said:
I rememebr one time where i was meeting a girl, and she asked if i wanted to come home to her palce and see her pussy. Now i've always loved cats, so i thought, why not.
But somehow she had managed to trick me, cause when we came to her place there was no cute kittens, only a bed on which she tried to suffocate my dick by jamming a rubber back over it's head and putting it in some sort of loin-chokehold til it went limp.
People can be so cruel sometimes...
I would strongly state "no".
Yes, there's stories out there of people meeting each other with no ill effects - I've had that myself. I've gone halfway down the country (England) to meet people a few times, when I was around your age. The major difference? It was a convention. I'd met a few people from that convention in a closer city. Major difference? One of the biggest cities in the country. My dad came with me to meet someone on one of those visits, and I spent most of that afternoon with him and his partner. 'twas a good day out.
Again, a girlfriend I had for a short period I met online. That was a risky move I made, one I'm not eager to repeat, although it went well. Whilst I went alone, she had a friend with her. Another girlfriend or... ahem, 3 I had, I met over MSN but they were at the same school as me. We made sure to meet there, and stuff was alright.
But, look, you're 14 going on 15. You're just too young (no offense) and too naive to go jetting across Europe to meet some guy you don't know. Life is dangerous and complex enough without you having to visit a strange country to meet a strange man. I'm not going to say he's obviously a paedophile, as only you have experience with him. I'm not going to say going is certain to be a mistake.
Seriously, though. You should be worrying more about life in your own country, not some guy you don't know. You have everything to live for, don't put yourself in a situation where you have a seemingly high chance of endangering yourself. Think of the sacrifices your mother will make, and the worry she'll feel when you're both over there. It'd be very sensible for you to not go.
Yes, there's stories out there of people meeting each other with no ill effects - I've had that myself. I've gone halfway down the country (England) to meet people a few times, when I was around your age. The major difference? It was a convention. I'd met a few people from that convention in a closer city. Major difference? One of the biggest cities in the country. My dad came with me to meet someone on one of those visits, and I spent most of that afternoon with him and his partner. 'twas a good day out.
Again, a girlfriend I had for a short period I met online. That was a risky move I made, one I'm not eager to repeat, although it went well. Whilst I went alone, she had a friend with her. Another girlfriend or... ahem, 3 I had, I met over MSN but they were at the same school as me. We made sure to meet there, and stuff was alright.
But, look, you're 14 going on 15. You're just too young (no offense) and too naive to go jetting across Europe to meet some guy you don't know. Life is dangerous and complex enough without you having to visit a strange country to meet a strange man. I'm not going to say he's obviously a paedophile, as only you have experience with him. I'm not going to say going is certain to be a mistake.
Seriously, though. You should be worrying more about life in your own country, not some guy you don't know. You have everything to live for, don't put yourself in a situation where you have a seemingly high chance of endangering yourself. Think of the sacrifices your mother will make, and the worry she'll feel when you're both over there. It'd be very sensible for you to not go.
wow the poll is tied I say parents cause you have googled his dad and he's one year older so DO MATH
You're in England, he's in Norway. Your respective nations are among the most mellow on the planet.
Also, both of you are dudes, so just meet in public and don't go in his basement.
Also, both of you are dudes, so just meet in public and don't go in his basement.
I must be the only person here who seriously doesn't think internet pedophiles are as common as the news would have us believe. At bare minimum I don't believe that every single person on the internet who has a profile that says they're 16 and don't get on camera is secretly a pedophile. Anybody here not take photos of themselves when they were 16? Hell, some kids are getting arrested for taking photos of themselves nude. I wouldn't go anywhere near a camera if I were his age.
Should you meet him? I'd say that's more an issue of how much you like him and how much money you have sitting around. I, for one, am entirely unconcerned that he is completely different from his description. Tell your parents where you're going and check in with them from time to time once you're there, of course, but that's just common sense. By the time you're in your mid-teens you're supposed to be at least starting your own life and a little bit of travel is not unheard of. If you were 8, I'd say stay home. You're 14, tell us how it all went once you get back.
Fear is what shackles us to our homes and workplace. Fear is what keeps us from exploring and learning. Fear is what makes us trade happiness for security. Widespread acceptance of fear as the norm is the reason why an 11yo boy riding the NY subway by himself made national news. You shouldn't be coddled by fear and forced to stay in your home because the news teaches us that cynicism is safer. I don't think for a minute that you're actually going to like this guy once you meet him, but never meeting him at all is the only wrong answer I can think of. Take your parents if you must, but don't waste your life away because you were too afraid to explore.
Should you meet him? I'd say that's more an issue of how much you like him and how much money you have sitting around. I, for one, am entirely unconcerned that he is completely different from his description. Tell your parents where you're going and check in with them from time to time once you're there, of course, but that's just common sense. By the time you're in your mid-teens you're supposed to be at least starting your own life and a little bit of travel is not unheard of. If you were 8, I'd say stay home. You're 14, tell us how it all went once you get back.
Fear is what shackles us to our homes and workplace. Fear is what keeps us from exploring and learning. Fear is what makes us trade happiness for security. Widespread acceptance of fear as the norm is the reason why an 11yo boy riding the NY subway by himself made national news. You shouldn't be coddled by fear and forced to stay in your home because the news teaches us that cynicism is safer. I don't think for a minute that you're actually going to like this guy once you meet him, but never meeting him at all is the only wrong answer I can think of. Take your parents if you must, but don't waste your life away because you were too afraid to explore.
While I appreciate you trying to skew my words into sexism, I never said they can't be. But that is the basic idea-- they're far less likely to be. Male predators make up 96-99% of the demographic. I would guess that there are some sex offenders who pose as women over the internet to lure unsuspecting boys into compromising situations, though.Cpt_Oblivious said:
Not sarcasm, just how I prefer to teach people an important lesson: you shouldn't ask internet people for advice.Monkeyman8 said:
Go there and get raped and murdered by a psychopath with a stolen identity.
Sounds like a fun night out.
Sounds like a fun night out.