Poll: Should I meet him?

[IxionIndustries]

Danger Will Robinson, Danger!

Yeah, those photos could easily be shooped, so the whole thing seems a bit sketcheh.

But as long as you go up with your *Armed* parents, then you should be fine. Unless he has a scheme where he kills your parents, kidnaps you, and sells you on the black market or something.

 

[P.Tsunami]

But as long as you go up with your *Armed* parents

Wait, what? Did I miss a part of this thread where it's stated the parents will be armed? Cause, well, we have very restrictive gun policies. It would be a criminal act for the parents to carry weapons of almost any kind. Or is my joke detector just off again?

k. Well at least wait till your 18 so if it is a pedophile he won't have interest then lol.

Disclaimer: I know you're joking. This is just a pet peeve of mine, so bear with me.

The word pedophile is a wildly misused word today. What you're looking for is 'hebephile' or 'ephebophile'. It's a rather important distinction, too, as it both demonizes a rather common condition (being attracted to teenagers), while at the same time lending the tiniest bit of leniency to a much more damaging one (being attracted to children - mind you, I do not suggest that every pedophile is a child molester). Also, there's no magical age limit at which a pedophile would stop being interested; it has to do with puberty.

To round off with horsing around, I now imagine the OP to be Chris Hansen.

 

[Nautical Honors Society]

He refuses to go on web cam and speak on XBL because of his accent.

Yea it doesn't matter what his excuse is...that is weird.

If you are truly set on seeing him bring your parents...and possibly a ninja.

 

[P.Tsunami]

Really, it bears repeating. There is nothing odd with a Norwegian being ashamed of his accent. It's very common here. With that said, I support all suggestions of caution. Still, no sense in assuming the guy's a creep. Just take the necessary measures to meet him in a safe environment, and you'll be fine.

 

[Comrade_Beric]

I have been talking to a boy a year older than me from Norway. We've been talking for 3 years now.
I met him online on a game called Puzzle pirates, I have him on facebook and msn so I've seen pictures of him. He refuses to go on web cam and speak on XBL because of his accent. I've wanted to go to Norway for a long time before I knew him. So when I finally go there should I meet him with my parents, or wait 10/15 years so if he's a paedophile he'll be about 60 and I'll be 25 so I can fight him off? I'm 14 nearly 15 and he's nearly 16.

I say go for it. But don't tell your parents, they won't understand-- you should sneak away to meet him at a private location of his choosing. Obviously he's a trustworthy and friendly person or you wouldn't even be considering this let alone talk to him for 3 years, so there's very little risk involved.

Yea, because sarcasm helps in every situation. Seriously, I've done this exact same thing with no international boundary and the genders reversed. We even spoke for about 3 years beforehand. IT WENT FINE.

I'd just inform your parents of what you're doing. I did.

The gender thing is actually a pretty crucial difference.

Why? Because women can't be sex offenders?

While I appreciate you trying to skew my words into sexism, I never said they can't be. But that is the basic idea-- they're far less likely to be. Male predators make up 96-99% of the demographic. I would guess that there are some sex offenders who pose as women over the internet to lure unsuspecting boys into compromising situations, though.

On a side note of that, has it ever occurred to you that perhaps while it may be true that women are less likely to be sex offenders, they may not be less likely to commit a sex offense? Short of using some sort of penetrative device, there is often no, or nearly no, physical evidence of the event left after the fact. There is also a culture in the west and particularly in the US that males cannot be raped by females or that males shouldn't complain about receiving sex. You only have to watch Jay Leno just after a teacher-student sex scandal to get the idea. Women may be just as willing to commit sexual crimes as males are, but are simply less likely to get caught or reported.

However, this is all entirely beside the point. The point here is, what is the actual likelihood that the guy, in this instance, is actually some sort of "online predator". I would say incredibly low. This is like telling someone that their kids shouldn't play outside unattended because a pedophile might drive by and swipe them. For some kind of perspective here if, for some demented reason, you wanted your child to kidnapped for any reason at all, much less a sexual one, you would have to leave your child outdoors, unattended, for 24 hours a day, every day of the year, for approximately 750,000 years before it becomes statistically likely. Your child is literally more likely to be shot during that time than stolen, yet we don't make our children wear bulletproof vests outdoors. Why? Because the news gives us a distorted view of the dangers we face. They report on things that seem out of the ordinary and thus do not report on the ordinary. The more people rely on the news for threat assessment and less on what they see, the more they believe the extraordinary to be the norm. Children die from drowning in private pools all the time, yet that will never make it past the local news. One child gets stolen in Missouri and the entire country is on alert. That doesn't make stolen children more normal than drowning, it just makes it more reported.

Back to the subject at hand: Everything I said before, I stand by. The risk is extremely overstated. Just have some common sense about how you go about it and do what you want, Musclepunch.

 

[Dags90]

Just take the necessary measures to meet him in a safe environment, and you'll be fine.

Meeting him in a well lit, populated, public place in the day time is asking to be raped though!

I think a lot of people are being paranoid. The chances of a 14 year old boy being forcibly taken from a busy public place in the day time are pretty slim. As it is, the majority of "kidnappings" are actually a form of custodial interference (in the U.S. anyway).

 

[Mr. Google]

This is how people get raped

I'm sorry but I laughed

Haha dont worry i was trying to go for a laugh

 

[Betancore]

I've met a lot of people from the internet in real life, and while there's definitely a risk involved in doing so, just use common sense. If you wanted to go to Norway anyway, then just try not to be too disappointed if he ends up not being who he says he is, and enjoy the trip. If you're going with your parents, then you should be fine. If you are meeting him alone, without your parents, make sure your parents know where you are, and when you'll be back. If you think they might discourage you from meeting him, ask yourself why.

And to be honest, going on cam is sort of like meeting someone in real life - you see and hear the person, right? So if he wants to meet you in real life, why doesn't he want to go on cam? Just verify his identity so you have no doubts about it, then if you need to persuade your parents, at least you won't have to persuade yourself at the same time.

 

[Comrade_Beric]

>Off topic. Would make a better personal message than a thread post. Carry on.<

Oh, and Donnyp, I have problems with what you said and have thus sent you a message.

 

[Uber Waddles]

EDIT: What I have said has already been said.

Im not saying yes, (I personally wouldnt, but its up to you) but meet on Webcam first to make sure its legit. TALK TO YOUR PARENTS, GET THEIR OPINION. Its easy to fake being nice, facebooks, pictures, even friends (the friend could help him too). If he refuses, I would contact the authorities, because it sounds like your dealing with something serious. If you do decide to go, take your parents, and meet in a public place. Be safe, best of luck for whatever you choose.

 

[Limzz]

Bring Chris Hansen.

 

[Vrach]

I have been talking to a boy a year older than me from Norway. We've been talking for 3 years now.
I met him online on a game called Puzzle pirates, I have him on facebook and msn so I've seen pictures of him. He refuses to go on web cam and speak on XBL because of his accent. I've wanted to go to Norway for a long time before I knew him. So when I finally go there should I meet him with my parents, or wait 10/15 years so if he's a paedophile he'll be about 60 and I'll be 25 so I can fight him off? I'm 14 nearly 15 and he's nearly 16.


EDIT:Bit of background Info..... I speak to a friend of his also, (who I met before him) I also googled his fathers name and got his address and it is a genuine house. He's on some school photos and football team photos and has 200 or so friends, he wasn't the one who instigated this and one time I was ill off school I appeared offline on msn all day and he wasn't on it once. And obviously I'd go with my parents. (How else would I afford it )

Ok first off, if he doesn't want to speak with you or use a webcam if he's got one, I'd say fuck it cause it sounds too shady (people who have mics/webcams don't refuse to use it if they'd be interested in meeting someone IRL). So sort that out first.

Second, his IRL friend... have you met him IRL? Or just knew him before through the same means? If the former, it's not much of a risk, especially with your parents around, if it's the latter, it's not much of a plus.

If/when, however, your only problem is previously knowing him through internet, don't be too worried about that. Yes, there are weirdos around on the net and you should be very careful, especially at 16 (don't mean to patronise you, but you're at a prime age for pedophile interest, as disgusting as that sounds, sorry >.< ).

But assuming you've seen/talked to him or knew him through other RL people, it's not really much different than a blind date or, if someone you know knows him, a hookup through a friend. And if your parents are around (I'd say, if possible, have them around at least when you first meet him to be safe), so much less for the risk. I know a few people who hooked up through games (not pathetic old losers, before you jump to it, normal people of all different ages), even met some who are happily married. It seems weird at first, but once you see a few couples you understand there's not much weird about it, it's mostly technophobia of sorts as it's the latest medium to be discovered. Remember, ages ago (and well, still in certain cultures), you'd just be paired off by someone else and wed to another person and a number of those people probably thought modern-day "normal" dating would be a pile of people you can't trust, violent psychos etc.

 

[cheese_wizington]

I guess it's time for cam or GTFO.

 

[cheese_wizington]

wait till u get older. buy a gun. go meat him. if he is a pedo shoot him in the dick. problem solved.

Reminds me somewhat of Sin City.

The only part of that relevant to Sin City is the dick shooting part...

 

[crazypsyko666]

I also had at least three knives on me just in case they were going to steal my liver.

well that's thoughtful, make their jobs a bit easier

Well, I wouldn't want to make it too hard, would I?