Poll: What is the best non weapon?

[rockera]

ha flame-thrower...deodorant and a box of matches it counts.

 

[Danpascooch]

I would probably use a bow, its quiet, and you can get about 15 feet from the zombie, and at that point, you really can't miss, but you aren't close enough to be grabbed like with a hand weapon, then you could just retrieve the arrow.

I'd use the sub par bow I had until I could loot something better.

It is intended as a weapon though. It was designed as a weapon and is used as a weapon. I mean something you can find readily around the house. A small, TV can do wonders in a pinch if you need a heavy object to strike zombies with. It doesn't even need to be capable of delivering the last blow, just something to keep the monster away from your delicious brain.

Eh, I have a bow in the house for recreation, and I don't plan on using it for any kind of combat, so I'm counting it.

Also, a small TV is a bad idea, it's not very sturdy, it's not nearly as hard as many other household objects, you could cut yourself on the glass, and blunt objects are generally a bad idea unless you can be absolutely sure they are strong enough to crush a zombie's skull (like a sledgehammer)

My point is that it can do in an emergency situation, like a one time deal. Sure there are other, better household objects in the house but maybe not in the same room. If I needed to leave town, I wouldn't lug around a TV with me. I would probably bust out my crowbar and fight towards the nearest place with real weapons, like the local RCMP detachment.

I just don't know why you even mentioned "small tv" when the other thing you just mentioned (crowbar) would literally be better in every situation. I can't see a single situation where a small tv would be useful considering zombies feel no pain

Strike it in the head to disorient it with the small tv, leave before it can get up and get a better weapon. It is a valid strategy if nothing else is around. Again, I mentioned Crowbar but from where I am sitting right now there IS no crowbar. Readily available is this tv, right beside me. If there was more than one zombie I would break the window with the tv and escape. I'm not going to try my luck going to the garage to get my crowbar if the zombie is only a few feet away.

If a zombie gets to you and all you have on hand is a small tv, you've already fucked up, and you're going to die.

Not necessarily. One zombie could be neutralized with a small TV, as long as you were careful. A runner-zombie would be harder to (re)kill, but not impossible.

If it was a runner zombie, you would be doubly fucked, but even a normal zombie, people don't seem to get it, skulls are THICK AND HARD, and you have to not only crack them, but absolutely PULVERIZE the brain within, to put a zombie down.

Could you crack a skull with a small TV in one hit? maybe, could you make a big hole in the skull and pulverize the brain within before he bites you? no fucking way/

You'd be screwed. all it takes is one bite.

You sir lack imagination; there are many ways a small tv could save your life going 1 on 1 with a zombie.
Of course it depends on the age old slow zombie versus fast zombie debate but still, whack the zombie hard enough and it will fall over, zombie falls over and you have a chance to flee the room and go get something better to actually kill it or, once the zombie falls over, you could try to repeatedly smash it's face against the floor with the tv. Also, you can smash the glass over his head and try to wedge the tv on the zombie's head, sure he's not dead but his ability to bite has suddenly and dramatically decreased with a tv set stuck on his head.
My overall message is simply that, you don't have to kill the zombie to "win".

You forget that zombies have all of the strength of a normal person, and while they are slower (a fast zombie would mean you're super dead) they feel absolutely no pain, if you bash it in the head with that TV and don't damage the brain within severely, it's not even going to notice

 

[Danpascooch]

I would probably use a bow, its quiet, and you can get about 15 feet from the zombie, and at that point, you really can't miss, but you aren't close enough to be grabbed like with a hand weapon, then you could just retrieve the arrow.

I'd use the sub par bow I had until I could loot something better.

It is intended as a weapon though. It was designed as a weapon and is used as a weapon. I mean something you can find readily around the house. A small, TV can do wonders in a pinch if you need a heavy object to strike zombies with. It doesn't even need to be capable of delivering the last blow, just something to keep the monster away from your delicious brain.

Eh, I have a bow in the house for recreation, and I don't plan on using it for any kind of combat, so I'm counting it.

Also, a small TV is a bad idea, it's not very sturdy, it's not nearly as hard as many other household objects, you could cut yourself on the glass, and blunt objects are generally a bad idea unless you can be absolutely sure they are strong enough to crush a zombie's skull (like a sledgehammer)

My point is that it can do in an emergency situation, like a one time deal. Sure there are other, better household objects in the house but maybe not in the same room. If I needed to leave town, I wouldn't lug around a TV with me. I would probably bust out my crowbar and fight towards the nearest place with real weapons, like the local RCMP detachment.

I just don't know why you even mentioned "small tv" when the other thing you just mentioned (crowbar) would literally be better in every situation. I can't see a single situation where a small tv would be useful considering zombies feel no pain

Strike it in the head to disorient it with the small tv, leave before it can get up and get a better weapon. It is a valid strategy if nothing else is around. Again, I mentioned Crowbar but from where I am sitting right now there IS no crowbar. Readily available is this tv, right beside me. If there was more than one zombie I would break the window with the tv and escape. I'm not going to try my luck going to the garage to get my crowbar if the zombie is only a few feet away.

If a zombie gets to you and all you have on hand is a small tv, you've already fucked up, and you're going to die.

Not necessarily. One zombie could be neutralized with a small TV, as long as you were careful. A runner-zombie would be harder to (re)kill, but not impossible.

If it was a runner zombie, you would be doubly fucked, but even a normal zombie, people don't seem to get it, skulls are THICK AND HARD, and you have to not only crack them, but absolutely PULVERIZE the brain within, to put a zombie down.

Could you crack a skull with a small TV in one hit? maybe, could you make a big hole in the skull and pulverize the brain within before he bites you? no fucking way/

You'd be screwed. all it takes is one bite.

unless you have the super secret "on the top shelf that no one can reach" antidote.

I like how you think.

Is think the right word?

 

[Danpascooch]

I would probably use a bow, its quiet, and you can get about 15 feet from the zombie, and at that point, you really can't miss, but you aren't close enough to be grabbed like with a hand weapon, then you could just retrieve the arrow.

I'd use the sub par bow I had until I could loot something better.

It is intended as a weapon though. It was designed as a weapon and is used as a weapon. I mean something you can find readily around the house. A small, TV can do wonders in a pinch if you need a heavy object to strike zombies with. It doesn't even need to be capable of delivering the last blow, just something to keep the monster away from your delicious brain.

Eh, I have a bow in the house for recreation, and I don't plan on using it for any kind of combat, so I'm counting it.

Also, a small TV is a bad idea, it's not very sturdy, it's not nearly as hard as many other household objects, you could cut yourself on the glass, and blunt objects are generally a bad idea unless you can be absolutely sure they are strong enough to crush a zombie's skull (like a sledgehammer)

My point is that it can do in an emergency situation, like a one time deal. Sure there are other, better household objects in the house but maybe not in the same room. If I needed to leave town, I wouldn't lug around a TV with me. I would probably bust out my crowbar and fight towards the nearest place with real weapons, like the local RCMP detachment.

I just don't know why you even mentioned "small tv" when the other thing you just mentioned (crowbar) would literally be better in every situation. I can't see a single situation where a small tv would be useful considering zombies feel no pain

Strike it in the head to disorient it with the small tv, leave before it can get up and get a better weapon. It is a valid strategy if nothing else is around. Again, I mentioned Crowbar but from where I am sitting right now there IS no crowbar. Readily available is this tv, right beside me. If there was more than one zombie I would break the window with the tv and escape. I'm not going to try my luck going to the garage to get my crowbar if the zombie is only a few feet away.

If a zombie gets to you and all you have on hand is a small tv, you've already fucked up, and you're going to die.

It depends on your definition of zombie but that is a debate for another thread. Lets leave it at that.

Zombie Survival Guide Zombie is always how I define zombies unless someone specifies "fast zombie"

In Zombie Survival Guide, they bite and cannibalize (but don't go for brains), they are slow, and can't really take more than 1 step per second at best. They have all of the strength of a normal person, except they are slow and lack all but the most basic coordination (they won't be able to open a door or climb anything)

They are independent of the need for oxygen, and are thus very hard to kill, they primarily infect by biting, but infection can occur from getting any of their bodily fluid inside of you (for example, splashing zombie blood on an open wound).

 

[BENZOOKA]

Shovel, a field shovel particularly. Like used in the military, the edges aren't exactly kept sharp and oiled for digging in the first place... But digging is still naturally the main purpose of a shovel. It's very compact, light, sturdy, sharp, durable and you can get lots of force behind it.

If not that, then an axe or a fancy-pants ceremonial Japanese sword, they aren't meant to be used as weapons after all.

 

[Hashime]

I have a machete that I keep nice and sharp for clearing spots while post camping. If it is considered a non weapon than That is what I would use. I however do consider it a weapon since it was the main weapon used in the Rwandan genocide.

 

[Abedeus]

I find a situation where I don't have a weapon is highly unlikely. Hell, I usually carry 1 real weapon and 1-2 improvised ones everywhere I go.

In case of emergency, Bike-Fu or Chair-Fu or even Bench-Fu would work nicely. If Jackie Chan can... okay, he's a master of improvised weaponry, but still it's effective.

Weapons I always have in my room: nun-chuks, a katana, two daggers + one persian dagger (really sharp, you could pierce skin with it easily), one telescopic self-defense mace (65cm reach, hurts like hell when hits bone) and scissors, lots of them.

Improvised weapons? Screwdrivers, MP4 player, a cross on a string, dog collar + chain (Rottweiler size), two acoustic guitars, a ping-pong pallet + 6 balls, several heavy books and dictionaries, two Bibles (1000 pages of pure force, so to speak - more than Harry Potter!), several speakers (each 2-3 kg), a PC (hehe) and a broken DVD player for use as a disposable air-to-head missile. Oh, oh, and a training "stepper", about 10kg, a really powerful weapon.

 

[Siuki]

PORTAL GUN.

The next best thing: dark energy infused zero-point gravity field manipulator. You know what I'm talking about if you know your Valve.

 

[Deviltongue]

I'd use a chain. They're so versatile.

There is a major problem with that. Most people I know these days have skinny little arms, not suited to swinging around a chain with any real heft.

It's like the chainsaw. Those things are not lite, and if they are lite, then it's probably just a garden saw or an electric saw. Fat chance of causing much real damage with either of those. Even if you managed to find one you could comfortable control, that was powerful enough, it's not going to last long, and will probably stop working correctly halfway through your first zombie. They where after all designed to saw through wood, not bodies.

I happen to live in the US. Should the zombie invasion happen I don't have to scrounge up an improvised weapon. I just have to go for my trusty shotgun, or one of several handguns I usually have around. Should they catch me unaware, and have me separated from any of the various weapons. I supposed them I would just grab whatever was handy.

There are knifes in the kitchen. One of the gun safes is in the laundry room. There are some tools like a pipe wrench in one of the bathrooms. The other leads into my room with a gun cabinet, There is another safe in the barn, and a couple more gun cabinets downstairs. Did I ever mention I was armed to the teeth?

Remind me to never piss you off... EVER!

 

[Outright Villainy]

My guitar most likely. It's got a pointy headstock. That or a frying pan. If it's good enough for a drunk squirrel...

 

[Project_Omega]

What is your favorite Non-weapon to use say during Z-day or if mutant aliens started attacking? Most people in my country really don't have weapons readily available. Would you go Gordon Freeman style and crowbar things to death or would you just use anything readily available (silent hill style).

For the definition of Non-weapon lets say it is "any object that was never designed to be used as a weapon."

Be realistic though, something a real person could pick up and hit a monster with.

Edit: Sorry, I can't fix the spelling mistake in the poll. I know it is Gordon Freeman but I can't change it now.

Is a butter knife a good example?

Or maybe gum?

PS: I am here to kick ass and chew bubble gum

...

but I am out of gum!

 

[cheese_wizington]

Well, seeming how I'm a weak ass person, I'd have to go with a small caliber firearm.

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_a6ssoQmIPug/SVcQJsxY6lI/AAAAAAAAA84/1PMXTP9kuyc/s400/Taurus+22.jpg

 

[Iron Criterion]

Well, seeming how I'm a weak ass person, I'd have to go with a small caliber firearm.

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_a6ssoQmIPug/SVcQJsxY6lI/AAAAAAAAA84/1PMXTP9kuyc/s400/Taurus+22.jpg

This. In the Zombie invasion if I am unable to get my hands on a firearm I am basically fucked.

 

[pelopelopelo]

Going on what's actually in the house right now, I would probably have a couple of kitchen knives and a bike chain.

 

[TheMonkeySlayer]

If there's a stupid joke potion in a poll (FREEMON) I feel compelled to vote for it.

 

[jakeEHTlovless]

I would probably use a bow, its quiet, and you can get about 15 feet from the zombie, and at that point, you really can't miss, but you aren't close enough to be grabbed like with a hand weapon, then you could just retrieve the arrow.

I'd use the sub par bow I had until I could loot something better.

It is intended as a weapon though. It was designed as a weapon and is used as a weapon. I mean something you can find readily around the house. A small, TV can do wonders in a pinch if you need a heavy object to strike zombies with. It doesn't even need to be capable of delivering the last blow, just something to keep the monster away from your delicious brain.

Eh, I have a bow in the house for recreation, and I don't plan on using it for any kind of combat, so I'm counting it.

Also, a small TV is a bad idea, it's not very sturdy, it's not nearly as hard as many other household objects, you could cut yourself on the glass, and blunt objects are generally a bad idea unless you can be absolutely sure they are strong enough to crush a zombie's skull (like a sledgehammer)

My point is that it can do in an emergency situation, like a one time deal. Sure there are other, better household objects in the house but maybe not in the same room. If I needed to leave town, I wouldn't lug around a TV with me. I would probably bust out my crowbar and fight towards the nearest place with real weapons, like the local RCMP detachment.

I just don't know why you even mentioned "small tv" when the other thing you just mentioned (crowbar) would literally be better in every situation. I can't see a single situation where a small tv would be useful considering zombies feel no pain

Strike it in the head to disorient it with the small tv, leave before it can get up and get a better weapon. It is a valid strategy if nothing else is around. Again, I mentioned Crowbar but from where I am sitting right now there IS no crowbar. Readily available is this tv, right beside me. If there was more than one zombie I would break the window with the tv and escape. I'm not going to try my luck going to the garage to get my crowbar if the zombie is only a few feet away.

If a zombie gets to you and all you have on hand is a small tv, you've already fucked up, and you're going to die.

Not necessarily. One zombie could be neutralized with a small TV, as long as you were careful. A runner-zombie would be harder to (re)kill, but not impossible.

If it was a runner zombie, you would be doubly fucked, but even a normal zombie, people don't seem to get it, skulls are THICK AND HARD, and you have to not only crack them, but absolutely PULVERIZE the brain within, to put a zombie down.

Could you crack a skull with a small TV in one hit? maybe, could you make a big hole in the skull and pulverize the brain within before he bites you? no fucking way/

You'd be screwed. all it takes is one bite.

unless you have the super secret "on the top shelf that no one can reach" antidote.

I like how you think.

Is think the right word?

depends on what your definition of thought is, my freind

 

[Danpascooch]

I would probably use a bow, its quiet, and you can get about 15 feet from the zombie, and at that point, you really can't miss, but you aren't close enough to be grabbed like with a hand weapon, then you could just retrieve the arrow.

I'd use the sub par bow I had until I could loot something better.

It is intended as a weapon though. It was designed as a weapon and is used as a weapon. I mean something you can find readily around the house. A small, TV can do wonders in a pinch if you need a heavy object to strike zombies with. It doesn't even need to be capable of delivering the last blow, just something to keep the monster away from your delicious brain.

Eh, I have a bow in the house for recreation, and I don't plan on using it for any kind of combat, so I'm counting it.

Also, a small TV is a bad idea, it's not very sturdy, it's not nearly as hard as many other household objects, you could cut yourself on the glass, and blunt objects are generally a bad idea unless you can be absolutely sure they are strong enough to crush a zombie's skull (like a sledgehammer)

My point is that it can do in an emergency situation, like a one time deal. Sure there are other, better household objects in the house but maybe not in the same room. If I needed to leave town, I wouldn't lug around a TV with me. I would probably bust out my crowbar and fight towards the nearest place with real weapons, like the local RCMP detachment.

I just don't know why you even mentioned "small tv" when the other thing you just mentioned (crowbar) would literally be better in every situation. I can't see a single situation where a small tv would be useful considering zombies feel no pain

Strike it in the head to disorient it with the small tv, leave before it can get up and get a better weapon. It is a valid strategy if nothing else is around. Again, I mentioned Crowbar but from where I am sitting right now there IS no crowbar. Readily available is this tv, right beside me. If there was more than one zombie I would break the window with the tv and escape. I'm not going to try my luck going to the garage to get my crowbar if the zombie is only a few feet away.

If a zombie gets to you and all you have on hand is a small tv, you've already fucked up, and you're going to die.

Not necessarily. One zombie could be neutralized with a small TV, as long as you were careful. A runner-zombie would be harder to (re)kill, but not impossible.

If it was a runner zombie, you would be doubly fucked, but even a normal zombie, people don't seem to get it, skulls are THICK AND HARD, and you have to not only crack them, but absolutely PULVERIZE the brain within, to put a zombie down.

Could you crack a skull with a small TV in one hit? maybe, could you make a big hole in the skull and pulverize the brain within before he bites you? no fucking way/

You'd be screwed. all it takes is one bite.

unless you have the super secret "on the top shelf that no one can reach" antidote.

I like how you think.

Is think the right word?

depends on what your definition of thought is, my freind

So no. No it is not

 

[darkknight9]

Conceal Carry FTW.