Question of the Day, October 26, 2010

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The Lizard of Odd

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Jun 23, 2009
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The Last Airbender. I haven't actually seen it, because I refuse to destroy all my fond memories of the show with that filth. I'd love to see it remade and done properly, it has such enormous potential.
 

JaredXE

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Apr 1, 2009
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Superman Returns.

No deadbeat dad issues, no Lois being a horrible single mother (taking your son on a strange boat while investigating a potential criminal activity? Wow, she's a dumb ****!), no Kryptonite continent (Yeah, Luthor is soooooo smart, he of course knows that the U.S., let alone the rest of the world would never bomb his ass dead for pulling that shit).

Basically just 2 hours of Supes flying around doing cool shit like the airplane scene.
 

Trifixion

Infamous Scribbler
Oct 13, 2009
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The Passion Of The Christ. I would rewrite it so they maybe get as far as the arrest and starting on the scourging when Jesus basically says, "Aw, HELL, no, I am NOT going through with this shit!" (at which point the movie switches over from Aramaic to English and his voice starts being dubbed in by Samuel L. Jackson) and busts out some holy-powered kung-fu to wail on some Roman asses, all the while shouting stuff like "HERE'S your seventy times seven times!" and "Time to turn the other cheek...INSIDE OUT!" Then he grabs Mary Magdalane, transforms her outfit into a tiny black bikini and stiletto heels ('cause I mean, seriously, you've got Monica Bellucci in the role, why not?) and rams his tongue down her throat while simultaneously blasting the Pharisees and Sadducees with lightning bolts from his fingers Palpatine-style. Now naturally the movie's Ambiguously Gendered Devil Portrayal doesn't much like The Son Of God going off-script like this, so he/she/it shows up and challenges El Jesu Christo to a lucha libr(rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr)e steel cage deathmatch with the salvation of humanity on the line.
 

TheMarkedOne

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Aug 11, 2010
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I'd change Night Watch (and possibly Day Watch too)
I really don't like what they did to the storyline (in comparison to the books).
 
Apr 7, 2010
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Anah said:
From the list: Terminater: Salvation

Let John Connor die. The Terminator is a lot more useful and would lead the Resistance towards victory.

Not on the list in particular: Star Wars Episode I to III. Wipe them. Destroy them. Rip them from this world.
I would rather just brutally murder Hayden Christensen.
 

Captain Pancake

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May 20, 2009
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X-Men the last stand. With a bit of work it could've been as good as the scarily impressive second film.

Dublin Solo said:
Star Wars! Episodes 4, 5 and 6. I would make them as crappy as George Lucas initially intended them to be. That way, a cult wouldn't have followed, and Lucas wouldn't have made Episodes 1, 2 and 3!
Not worth it.
 

Twilight_guy

Sight, Sound, and Mind
Nov 24, 2008
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Your asking fanboys to decide what they most want to change to settle continuity disputes and there own personal dislike for things they feel "ruined" good franchises?
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!
OH ho ho, that slaps me on he knee. I refer you to the fanboys badge in my profile and laugh heartily.

I'm not quiet sure what movie I'd change. I mostly just think that movies wind up a certain way and you really can't change that. It's just like any other form of art.
 

Snowpact

He is the Walrus
Oct 15, 2008
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Super Toast said:
The Last Airbender.
This. I don't how I would do it, but at least make it with reasonable actors, a better script and with something that makes people crave for more (read: a sequel). I'd like to call the latter the "Iron Man-effect".
 

L4hlborg

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Jul 11, 2009
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2001: Space Odyssey.

What I would do is, that I would remove black screens in the middle of the movie, explain shit and just make it more like the book in general. As in so that it would make some sense.
 

Mr. Omega

ANTI-LIFE JUSTIFIES MY HATE!
Jul 1, 2010
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X-Men The Last Stand. But I'd make sure they manage to somehow keep THIS.


But as for changes:
1: I would NOT kill half the cast.
2:I'd also change the villain. Maybe make Magneto team up once again with them to fight... oh, I don't know...

3: I'd hint at Apocalypse for 4, maning there could ACTUALLY BE A 4!
4: No Dark Pheonix. At least not yet.
 

Abanic

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Jul 26, 2010
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Specifically, I'd like to alter Star Wars Episode 1.

I'd age Anakin and do my best to make him a badass that people root for instead of a whiny *****, cut the midiclorians and chosen one references, and begin the romance storyline.

By fundamentally altering Episode 1, it becomes necessary to alter Episodes 2 & 3 as well. Count Dooku brought nothing to the story so his character can be cut entirely and replaced with Grievous. General Grievous should be the reanimated husk of Darth Maul and have prototype cyborg mechanisms that would be perfected with Vader. Chewbacca and should be removed from the prequel trilogy. Jango and Boba Fett should not be seen unmasked in order to preserve their species/origin/intrigue.
 

catalyst8

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Oct 29, 2008
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Warrior Irme said:
I would take the remastered versions of Star Wars movies and remove the slew of added shit to the movies. We must join together and stop George Lucas before it's too late.
It's already too late, I'm sorry to say. It was already too late with The Return of The Jedi, & it's an utter bloody mystery why they let Lucas carry on with even more directorial control to make a further three of the abominations. Those bastard Ewok/cut price wookies sounded the death knell of the Star Wars saga, & Lucas rubbed salt in the wound with Jar Jar fucking Binks & progressively more shallow characters, bland dialogue & indecipherable narrative with no plot arc whatsoever.

Let us kill him & offer his remains to create a Terry Gilliam-David Cronenberg hybrid to remake the films succeeding Empire.

In fact, let's just kill him.
 

Abanic

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Jul 26, 2010
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Kristoffer Sivertsen said:
Anah said:
From the list: Terminater: Salvation

Let John Connor die. The Terminator is a lot more useful and would lead the Resistance towards victory.

Not on the list in particular: Star Wars Episode I to III. Wipe them. Destroy them. Rip them from this world.
I would rather just brutally murder Hayden Christensen.
Can someone please explain this Hayden Christensen hate to me? He's been in other movies and did just fine. He's just an actor, and as an actor he has to do what the script says. If you hand any actor a script written by a flatulent baboon, then that actor can only do so much with it. If the director thinks 'whiny, emo, *****' is the cool thing to be, and you are being paid to play that role, then you have to do the job that you were hired for. Why hate the guy who's only trying to collect a paycheck? Shouldn't the hate go to the gibbering chimp who wrote the story and the director who's hopelessly out of touch with the intended audience (holy crap, they're one and the same!)

I'm not trying to be a jerk, but I truly don't understand why this actor receives such hate all the time. He's only doing what the writer/director tells him to do, and if he doesn't then he gets fired and the writer/director finds someone who will do what they're told.
 

interspark

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Dec 20, 2009
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i dunno, all those films are pretty great, but given the first chance i would change the Harry Potter films so that they followed the DAMN BOOKS!!!!! i dont care how Harry escapes from Malfoy Mansion, if Dobby's not there it's stupid and cheap, if he is it's too little too late, he was SUPPOSED to return in Goblet Of Fire!!!!

sorry, dont EVER mention Harry Potter films to me OK? this will ALWAYS happen
 

interspark

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Dec 20, 2009
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Mr. Omega said:
X-Men The Last Stand. But I'd make sure they manage to somehow keep THIS.

see, i didnt like that scene, it contradicts the rest of the movie! pyro said earlier that he could crush anything once he gathered momentum, but here he smashes up the floor from a standstill!
 

PrimoThePro

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Jun 23, 2009
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Spiderman, Peter Parker wouldn't be a whiny *****, and instead would be sarcastic and hilarious.