Random Answers for Random Idiots with Random Questions

[Jakub324]

Why, in films, is their always sound when people are in the vacuum? It doesn't exist there!

 

[Jabberwock xeno]

Who has a bigger ego, Vegeta, Duke Nukem, or Johnny Cage?

Hmm... I think I'll go with Duke, at least Cage and Vegeta acknowledge it when they're out matched

I think their combined narcassicism might make the universe implode.

 

[TiloXofXTanto]

The question is this: Given that God is infinite, and that the universe is also infinite... would you like a toasted teacake?

Nope, not a fan of teacakes, they keep exploding when I eat them.

why do men pee while standing even though peeing while sitting is less tiring?

Because it separates them from women in a way that annoys the other party. Which is hilarious.

Ok, here's a question I got from something called a book.
"Teeth is to Hen, as Nest is to what?"

Teeth is to Hen, as Nest is to flaming raven.

What've I missed since I was away from the forums?

Enough.

What's it like being a lady?

Terrible, I assure you. Been one three times and hated it all three.

What is the answer to this?
http://functions.wolfram.com/EllipticFunctions/ArithmeticGeometricMean/introductions/ArithmeticGeometricMean/05/13/imagetext/0058/text58.gif

Equivalent to the distance between The Earth and the Earth's timid admirer

If practise makes perfect, and no one is perfect, what does practice do?

Eh, it annoys students and musicians. That's about it.

 

[imnot]

Ponies?

ANSWER THE QUESTION >

 

[oblivion220791]

if pig flies and bird talks, would the universe stays the same?

 

[Owlslayer]

Did you just call me a random idiot?

 

[Tortoiseloz]

Why does water refesh our brains?
How does wikipedia know so many facts?
Why do you hate ponies?
Whats the point of captchas?
Why is the order on keyboards qwerty instead of abcdef?
How do you know so many facts?
Why are Mages the most Overpowered class?
Why are Warlocks the only class that isnt overpowered?
Cucumbers?
and last but not least
if a=x but the figurment of x is not a number then how do the beavers fgure out how to transport the postcards to apple lane without the land sharks finding them when the moon is out on the thirty second morning on the 5th of spetember?

 

[TiloXofXTanto]

Why did the OC have to end? Surely the ratings didn't drop so much in season 3?

Because I killed the producers, and I am very sorry.

Will St. Louis Blues ever win a Stanley Cup?

Yes, but the timing is dependent on whether or not they begin playing with flaming hockey sticks, or frozen pucks.

is this sentence false?

Nope, questions cannot be false, as they have no values.

Are the black bits in bananas tarantula eggs?

When you're upside down what way is up?

What does the scouter really say about his power level?

1. only the ones from Plantations in Eastern South America
2. Whichever way is away from Earth.
3. The scouter says nothing, it doesn't talk.

Can you see what makes cinnamon toast crunch so popular?

Strange television ads informing children of the stupidity of adults.

 

[Philbyy]

snip

Question: What is love?

Baby don't hurt me

 

[DragonBorn96]

Why is a raven like a writing desk?

 

[TiloXofXTanto]

why did the chicken cross the road?

Because the KFC is on the side he's leaving

Are the black bits in bananas tarantula eggs?

Mighty Boosh, I like it.

How far can a man walk in his lifetime, with 8 hours sleep a night, an average lifetime and walking speed, and sufficient nutrition acquired with a one hour rest per night?

hm tough one, 2326875 Miles (approximately)

What's it like being a lady?

Ya gain some parts and lose some others, that's about it (believe me, I tried...).

OT: Who is the Englishman?

The man who has English'd us all.
(Gregory Wilkinson)

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

Relatedly, if Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers, where's the peck of pickled peppers Peter Piper picked?

1. Already answered that
2. In my basement, rotting with the cat.

 

[TiloXofXTanto]

If we are all but tainted coils of a 4-way Diablo standing on the Monolithic edge of a Silver Future, restlessly awaiting our inevitable demise in the Temple Of Your Dreams, how come God Says No against the Venus In Furs?

Probably because he's a *****, if for no other reason. Bastard, insult my work will you.

What is the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow?

Already answered, I believe it's on page 4

These are all questions my dad asked me when I was younger...

How many beans make 5?
How long is a piece of string?
What is half the half of 1 and a half?

1. Ten
2. Depends on how far you stretch it, and when the asshole with scissors cuts it.
3. 0.375

 

[TiloXofXTanto]

Do you actually speak German, and do I actually speak German?

Aber natürlich.

Ich war nicht unter Bezugnahme auf Sie

That definatly answers the question, it can't be you.




Question: Then who was phone?

My friend here, Cornelius.

Wow.. I'm baffled...

Try this one:

What is the number I'm thinking of (and say it in my native language).

hmm, I'm gonna go with, ごひゃくにじゅきゅ,　Zwei, or Veltinsis

 

[Doclector]

What colour are weskers' underpants?

 

[TiloXofXTanto]

Why do I always forget where I have put my keys?
And where did I put them!?!?!

1. Because they're running from you
2. Look east of your current location.

Who was phone?

Cornelius

Obligatory: Have you ever been so far even as decided to use go want to look more like?

Are Vikings heptagonal?

Why does she sell seashells by the seashore if a seashore has a surplus of sea shells to supply?
Wouldn't that be a shitty sales strategy?

Magic conch, will I ever get married?

What should I have for dinner tonight?

Dyou wanna cookie?

Am I just a dream a butterfly is having?

If so, where is it and what happens when I wake it up?

1. Because she's a terrible saleswoman
2. Ahem, Try again later
3. Corn, definitely corn
4. Yes
5. No, you're a dream that Aristotle is having, that's why so many history classes devote so much to him
6. You'll turn into a butterfly.

Who has a bigger ego, Vegeta, Duke Nukem, or Johnny Cage?

Hmm tough choice, I'm gonna have to go with THIS GUY:

Why am I the greatest person in the history of the universe?

Does space go on forever? It seems impossible. There has to be more beyond.

There is more, but you will never reach it, for you are sadly made of matter.

 

[TiloXofXTanto]

if i ask a pointless question and recieve a pointless answer, and someone reads it and learns something from it, is it still pointless?

NO, for no question is pointless. They are all equally purposeful

there is a door. the key is inside. how do you get the key?

By breaking open the door with your fists

If you were an estonian lesbian albino dwarf and could grant one wish, what would be

Your favorite plant
Your favorite celestial body
Your favorite pasttime
The first thing you'd do

and why?

1. I'd grant my wish to not be an Estonian lesbian albino dwarf
2. Pitcher plants
3. Venus (HA HA HA GAIA!!)
4. Whatever I'm obsessed with at the time (Empire total war right now)
5. Regain my original appearance and knowledge, because BEING HUMAN IS WEIRD...and boring.

What does "Klaatu barada nikto" mean?

Either, "Peace" or "Feel the flooring"
Translation issues.

what is the meaning of life?

Subjective, entirely subjective.

 

[TiloXofXTanto]

Do you regret making this thread?

Not in the least good sir

If a tree falls in the forest, and it falls on a mime, does anyone care?

You were ninja'd

Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?, and is A Clockwork Orange still an orange, if so, then why aren't all oranges made from clockwork?

1. No, they dream in Matrix-o-vision.
2. Yes
3. Because tree's can't grow complex metal structures.

The principle of relativity states that there is no preferred inertial reference frame, but how do we know there is no preferred inertial reference frame? What would change in current physical theories if there were an absolute frame of reference against which all other inertial frames could be measured?

1. Because the only constant in this universe doesn't affect inertia.
2. All calculations would be off by 0.34262588457224554673456738665355427835687 or 100238047.4567

Why, in films, is their always sound when people are in the vacuum? It doesn't exist there!

Because Film makers will not have these petty laws of physics inhibiting their work.

Ponies?

ANSWER THE QUESTION >

No, no ponies here sir.

if pig flies and bird talks, would the universe stays the same?

Mostly, but Ducks would also be able to fly at mach 12.

 

[TiloXofXTanto]

Did you just call me a random idiot?

Nope, just a small inside joke

Why does water refesh our brains?
How does wikipedia know so many facts?
Why do you hate ponies?
Whats the point of captchas?
Why is the order on keyboards qwerty instead of abcdef?
How do you know so many facts?
Why are Mages the most Overpowered class?
Why are Warlocks the only class that isnt overpowered?
Cucumbers?
and last but not least
if a=x but the figurment of x is not a number then how do the beavers fgure out how to transport the postcards to apple lane without the land sharks finding them when the moon is out on the thirty second morning on the 5th of spetember?

1. Because you run off of water
2. Because of people who enjoy spreading information
3. Because I am not fond of colors and have an innate hate for hooved animals.
4. Bots can't read'em, and therefore can't post
5. Because no one likes Dvorak
6. Superior information retention skills and great experience
7. Because they can control the fabric of the universe, THAT'S INHERENTLY TOO POWERFUL!!
8. Cause they're often evil, and that decreases their effectiveness
9. Kappas would love them
10. Doesn't matter, vests don't have sleeves, so the land sharks will freeze to death.

Why is a raven like a writing desk?

Because there's a B in both and an N in neither.

 

[Redingold]

Does a set that contains all sets that do not contain themselves contain itself?

 

[TiloXofXTanto]

What colour are weskers' underpants?

As of this moment, Bleagle.