Ruin-A-Wish Foundation.

[AwesomeExpress]

Granted, but it's made by a homeless guy who didn't wash his hands.

I wish for a plate full of thai boneless ribs.

 

[Redlin5_v1legacy]

Granted, it's made of Taiwanese people.

I wish for nothing.

 

[Hyperrhombus]

Granted. But you realise that even nothing is something, and the resulting paradox implodes your face.

I wish for a portal gun.

 

[Redlin5_v1legacy]

Granted but the portal unleashes monsters into this realm, killing all you love.

I wish for dancing.

 

[Eumersian]

Granted. You leave your friends behind.
[sup][sup]Cookie for teh refenence! [/sup][/sup]

I wish for a better graphics card.

 

[Heartcafe]

Granted but the graphics become so real you loose all sense of reality while playing video games and die from starvation.

I wish for the heat to go away :/

 

[Eumersian]

Granted. Heat, as a concept, vanishes from existence, turning the fabric of reality upside down.

I wish for something infinitely corruptible.

 

[Redlin5_v1legacy]

Not granted.

I wish for the ability to grant wishes that always backfire on the wisher.

 

[AwesomeExpress]

Granted, but then ...your face.. explodes..

I wish this girl would like me already!

 

[Redlin5_v1legacy]

Granted, she now likes you so much that she is too afraid to come near you lest she start ripping off your clothing and running off to add them to her shrine.

I wish for meat.

 

[Eumersian]

Granted. Man meat.

I wish for an R2-D2 replica.

 

[Redlin5_v1legacy]

Granted, but you get R5-D4 instead. He will start your house on fire.

I wish for a quote message.

 

[AwesomeExpress]

Granted, but there's computer error and it didn't show up.

I wish for a lounge for my lazy lion.

 

[QuietCupOfTea]

Granted, but the lion thinks it's too small and attacks you.

I wish for a new MP3 player.

 

[Redlin5_v1legacy]

Granted but it only plays propaganda music files.

I wish for thirty seven donkeys.

 

[Eumersian]

Granted. You get a baker's 37 or donkeys, which is more than you can handle. Then you die of bone cancer.

I wish for no cancer.

 

[Redlin5_v1legacy]

Granted, enjoy that lightning strike.

I wish for more Captain America.

 

[AwesomeExpress]

Granted, go see the Avengers movie when it comes out, and maybe if we're lucky they'll make a sequel for ol' Cappy. And that it'll be just as good.

I wish for hot girl to keep suntanning in her backyard.

 

[AndyWest]

granted but so does her grand dad.

I wish for super powers.

 

[AwesomeExpress]

Granted, your super power is that you can hear snails crawl.

I wish to know what Katie said.