Ruin-A-Wish Foundation.

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Oct 10, 2011
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Granted, but the copy you get is more buggy than the initial release of New Vegas.

I wish I could defeat my Escapist nemesis, Fijiman.
 

Dalek Caan

Pro-Dalek, Anti-You
Feb 12, 2011
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Granted, but to do so you must push a large square boulder up a 89 degree slope.

I wish I was Ghost Rider.
 

Jolly Co-operator

A Heavy Sword
Mar 10, 2012
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Granted, but you don't know how to ride a motorcycle, and you can never learn.

I wish that mosquitoes and other annoying insects would stop bothering me.
 

KOMega

New member
Aug 30, 2010
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Granted. Bugs detest the very thought of you.
In fact your repellant nature is so strong it repels all insects out of the earth.
The ecosystems of the world fall apart.

I wish I had a bag of infinite bananas
 

LordofHeart

New member
Jul 23, 2013
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Ganted, but there's no way that all of them will stay fresh and soon they're all spoiled.

I wish I had a jar of dirt.
 

LordofHeart

New member
Jul 23, 2013
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Sweet! Now I have a jar of dirt AND flesh melting bacteria! =D

Granted, but the device explodes after one usage.

I wish for the ability to actualize anything at a thought but only at a purposeful thought, no accidentally releasing a Reaper or something like that, and that anything actualized was under my complete control.
 

Teoes

Poof, poof, sparkles!
Jun 1, 2010
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Granted, but you're struck down by a bus that wasn't under your complete control and you're no longer capable of purposeful thought.

I wish I had spicy chicken wings.
 

LordofHeart

New member
Jul 23, 2013
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Granted, but the chicken wings are so hot that they make The Source look like a Bell Pepper, which is to say that they're so hot that the moment you bite down, not even chew or anything just bite down on it, your whole body combusts spontaneously.

I wish for immortality, invulnerability, and eternal youth and could grant this ability upon anyone of my choosing along with the ability to adapt to anything, such as being frozen, my body would heat up and melt the ice, if it was hot outside, my internal temperature would lower to compensate, i.e. Darwin's mutant ability.
 

LordofHeart

New member
Jul 23, 2013
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See, I thought about that. That's why I have the ability to grant those abilities to anyone of my choosing as well. =D

Granted, but the water is so cool it's at absolute zero. You'll be waiting for a looooong time to drink that water.

I wish for the next person to read this to make a wish that will get corrupted.
 
Oct 10, 2011
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Granted, but you read it before I did, so your wish is corrupted by corrupting your wish that you wished to corrupt someone else's wish.

I wish that my wish would not be corrupted.
 

Teoes

Poof, poof, sparkles!
Jun 1, 2010
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Granted, but you can miss the hidden downside to it and have it ruined nonetheless. You only have yourself to blame.

I wish I could construct really clever, witty and funny posts in threads like this.
 

KOMega

New member
Aug 30, 2010
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Granted, you construct the most witty and clever posts of all time. The wit is so damned sharp that you also impale and decapitate the thread, thus killing it. No one can respond to your incredibly clever post, and so it slowly sinks into the pile of forgotten old posts, never to be seen again, whose only witnesses were so struck with awe they didn't know if it was only a dream or not. It's kinda funny.

I wish I remembered to bring my lunch.
 

Teoes

Poof, poof, sparkles!
Jun 1, 2010
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Granted, but it's last year's lunch. That sandwich could now be poured.

I wish I could frolic outside in the rain this morning.
 

LordofHeart

New member
Jul 23, 2013
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Granted, but the first time you try to fly, you don't realize the speed you have and rocket out of the atmosphere.

I wish that I was a master Necromancer.
 

KOMega

New member
Aug 30, 2010
641
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Granted. You now have the power to raise and control the dead.
However the only way you can control them it seems is to wake them for short dance numbers.
Your title has been renamed to Master NecroDancer and give new meaning to Dancing with the Dead.

I wish I was better at writing.
 

KOMega

New member
Aug 30, 2010
641
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Granted, you put the disc back in the box and use it to hold down your papers. Paperweights are easy to use.

I wish that guy who I bought this delicious cup of chili from gave me a bit more.