Ruin-A-Wish Foundation.

[Wary Wolf]

I'm not picky ... I mean:

Granted! Your Vigilante Force is a force to be reckoned with! Batman takes offence and beats you all up.

I wish that pens would not suddenly stop working as soon as I start writing something important

 

[FPLOON]

Granted, due to by bias dislike of pens in general, anything you would have written from an unlimited ink pen wouldn't have been that important, anyway... (Also, the pens explode on contact!)

I wish for a windy blow joj!

 

[UltraDeth]

Granted, here's an electric fan

I wish daily life is as easy as The Sims

 

[FPLOON]

Granted, not only do you constantly keep wetting yourself due to a lack of a bathroom in you house, but also you're at the "mercy" of a computer mouse, of sorts...

I wish the plot thickened... if you know what I mean... ;p

 

[UltraDeth]

Granted, but the outcome was predictable, nudge, nudge.

I wish I was cute as an anime

 

[Wary Wolf]

I'm sure you already are but...

Granted! OH NO! HERE COMES THE TENTICLE PORN!

I wish the hay fever would go away

 

[UltraDeth]

Granted, now it's a flu

I wish I could wake up in a big bowl of Wine Guns every Sunday

 

[Wary Wolf]

Granted, but you meant to say wine gums, I assume? Too bad! You get guns made out of wine! Bad quality wine! And also you sleep through every Sunday!

I wish birds would pick other cars than my own to crap on

 

[UltraDeth]

Granted, this leads to bird shooting in your neighbourhood

I wish I could camouflage

 

[FPLOON]

Granted, you now have to "breath through your skin" while "inadvertently" getting objectified...

I wish I was "hooked on a feeling" in space!

 

[UltraDeth]

Granted, you're attached to a Fulton recovery balloon in SPAAAAAACE!

I wish all problems can be cured with pornography

 

[FPLOON]

Granted, it ironically does not cure the inclusion of better pornography...

I wish the rap battle wasn't rigged!

 

[UltraDeth]

Granted, the contests shoot each other instead

I wish I had a fleet of superior aircraft

 

[FPLOON]

Granted, they all crash into each other due to inexperienced flying...

I wish it didn't take that long to know how I met your mother!

 

[UltraDeth]

Granted, I see nothing to object to

I wish I could make a good cup of coffee

 

[FPLOON]

Granted, you drink it out of a poisoned cup...

I wish I could record more than 100 shows at a time!

 

[blue heartless]

Granted, but only post-lobotomy patients watch them.

I wish, dear Trish that I hadn't flushed that fish.

 

[FPLOON]

Granted, dear Trish ends up killed by a zombie fish instead...

I wish I could bond with my co-father!

 

[Drake the Dragonheart]

He has you surgically bonded to his body.

I wish for Belgian waffles.

 

[FPLOON]

Granted, they're made in China...

I wish I wasn't "it"!