Ruin-A-Wish Foundation.

[Vrex360]

Granted, they fly to far out into the sunset and burn.

I wish I had a boxing robot that danced with me.

 

[steeple]

granted, the dance is called "the mike tyson", guess how it goes?

I wish to be able to throw my eyeballs at random people on the street and put them back in without any damage...

 

[Robert632]

Granted. Someone eventually steals your eyes.

I wish for licorice

 

[Redlin5_v1legacy]

Granted. It revives Adolf Hitler and all his Nazi friends. Way to go.

I wish for banana.

 

[steeple]

granted, someone sticks it... somewhere...

I wish for a delicious untampered-with apple pie

 

[Dr.Susse]

Granted but the guy you just stole it off is a bit angry, oh hey he has a gun!

I wish for a better reason to go to work.

 

[Robert632]

Grnated. You're forced o go there at gunpoint, and you will forever have a gunman pointing a gun at you while you work, until you snap and try to escape. Naturally you die.

I wish for a glass of chocolate milk.

 

[Vesuvius Hetlan]

Granted. Its soy.

I wish for a harem.

 

[Eumersian]

Granted. They all have VD.

I wish for no VD.

 

[KarmaTheAlligator]

Granted but you get worse (not sure what VD is)

I wish I could fly.

 

[pyramid head grape]

Granted. You can now fly, buy it takes the same effort as walking.

I wish I was super smurt! :3

 

[Dr.Susse]

Grated but your intelligence allows you to realise how sweet it was to be an idiot like the rest of us.

I wish for a better way of spending time.

 

[BGH122]

Granted, but you find a better time taking crack cocaine. You die three years later, stabbed to death by an unruly pimp in a crack house.

I wish I were homosexual.

 

[Sarcastic_Applause]

Granted. But every guy around you is Straight

I wish I could run as fast as sonic

 

[steeple]

granted, they make a gaming franchise out of you, and milk it so much, even after the games are really bad, that now everyone hates you...

I wish I had an extra arm

 

[GodofDisaster]

Granted but it's has a mind of it's own and is always trying to hurt you in someway.

I wish the Pokemon Manga was made into an anime and it follows the manga storyline perfectly and is just as dark.

 

[steeple]

granted, the first time you watched pokemon as a child, you watched the darker one. someone died in it and it fucked you up so back you required constant psychiatric therapy...

I wish for something that would be fitting...

 

[BGH122]

Granted, you're encased in a tomb that fits you so snugly that you can't move.

I wish I would have finished my medical studies.

 

[Eumersian]

Granted. You finish and become a pediatric oncologist. You live a depressing life from then on.

I wish for innate beauty.

 

[Flamezdudes]

Granted but only when nobody is looking.

I wish I could have a Let the right one in shrine