@Trilby: *smacks you across the face* Snap out of it! He's here, there's nothing we can do now. Except lynch him...
Serial Killer Round 37: The Special Holiday Edition (Get those votes in.)
- Thread starter axle 19
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@Mort silly mort, i didnt shoot you with a slug. i shot you with a bullet. *shoots you in the other leg*
This is Randy Omrey Porter live at the smoldering crater that once housed the Murderville Resident Mr. Omega! There were no survivors of the massive explosion in this one-resident house. Here to give you the details of this heinous crime is Paul Iceman. Paul?
Thanks Randy. As you can see here on the carcass, the victim was killed by getting mauled by a very large and possibly rusty knife. It seems too large to have been a kitchen knife, so it probably wasn't in his home. Anyway, afterwards, as you can see by the caved-in skull, afterwards he was bludgeoned, most likely as he was bleeding out, probably by the hilt of the knife. The contorted wrists suggest a struggle, but it's hard to tell because the fingers are all missing. However, the clean cut at the palm shows they were probably sliced off. We managed to piece together a small story. He was in his room on a couch, when he got a stab in the neck. He turned, got his hands slashed off, was struck on the head a couple times, then stabbed again and again until he was dead.
Well how did the explosion happen, Paul?
Fuck if I know, you ever see the weird stuff that happens around here?
Thank you for the information Paul. That'll do it for your Murderville local crime news.
Thanks Randy. As you can see here on the carcass, the victim was killed by getting mauled by a very large and possibly rusty knife. It seems too large to have been a kitchen knife, so it probably wasn't in his home. Anyway, afterwards, as you can see by the caved-in skull, afterwards he was bludgeoned, most likely as he was bleeding out, probably by the hilt of the knife. The contorted wrists suggest a struggle, but it's hard to tell because the fingers are all missing. However, the clean cut at the palm shows they were probably sliced off. We managed to piece together a small story. He was in his room on a couch, when he got a stab in the neck. He turned, got his hands slashed off, was struck on the head a couple times, then stabbed again and again until he was dead.
Well how did the explosion happen, Paul?
Fuck if I know, you ever see the weird stuff that happens around here?
Thank you for the information Paul. That'll do it for your Murderville local crime news.
Thought I'd try posting a death post-humanly. Add in some bad name puns and there we go.
@Omega: As a man, I'm almost ashamed to admit it... but after seeing that line (you know the one)...I giggled...like a schoolgirl...
@Neo: No one does, man. No one does.
@Axle: It could be that the new site design is turning people off of the Escapist. Whose vote have you gotten?
@Axle: It could be that the new site design is turning people off of the Escapist. Whose vote have you gotten?
Why do I feel like I should just slaughter everyone out right? Not just for the state of the low content back and forth posting, but also for any puns that I didn't read because I didn't want to waste my time reading through pages of that previously mentioned back and forth crap.
@Element: Aw, dude, then you're gonna hate this thread... :S
http://www.escapistmagazine.com/news/view/115101-Science-Unlocks-Big-Head-Mode-For-Ants
The comments are just... well, I don't think I need to explain.
http://www.escapistmagazine.com/news/view/115101-Science-Unlocks-Big-Head-Mode-For-Ants
The comments are just... well, I don't think I need to explain.