SEX!!!

[quiet_samurai]

I have noticed that many users here on The Escapists seem to regard sex (or at least the pre-marital kind) as something not important, needed or enjoyable in a relationship, or at least not as important as love.

It's probably because 75% of the people on here have never had sex and don't understand it. Also because it's easy to not like somehting you are not getting.

 

[USSR]

I think there is a strong difference between lust and love..

..juss sayin'

 

[MrNades]

In a good relationship you really do need a good (maybe not equal) balance of both physical and emotional activity.

 

[Booze Zombie]

Sex is good, casual or marital, that's up to the people involved, really.

 

[Ledan]

Sex is the reason we have relationships. Think about, why do we work? To get money, why do we need money? To buy stuff and have nice things. Why do we need nice things? To get respect. Why do we need respect? To get noticed by people. Why do we need to get noticed? To get a date. Why do we need a date? To get a relationship. And why do we get a relationship? To get laid.

Woah woah woah! I buy things to make myself feel happy. How in the world do I gain 'respect' by buying Fallout 1,2, and tactics?
Besides, the three first three things are just because of modern society (work, money, nice things).
Though I would say that a good relationship needs sex. Our body needs it from time to time, after all, our primary purpose is to have children and to take care of them.

 

[ontherisess]

I'n my opinion a girlfriend without sex is pretty much not a girlfriend. Really everything besides sex is done with all your friends to be perfectly honest except for living together but even most people do that as people often get room mates.

 

[Emperor Inferno]

Sex is good, outside of marriage or not. What makes it truly great is having it with someone you're in love with. It just adds another element of pleasure to not only have an orgasm, but also to give one to someone you love.

 

[D3athBat]

Sex is like air,it only becomes important when youre not getting any..
XD

No,but seriously,I think that Sex plays a vital role in a relationship,it shows that you and your partner trust and love eachother enough to have sex,which then goes on to form an even stronger bond between the couple etc,which is all good!

Being in a relationship myself,I think that if I wasnt able to have sex with my girlfriend,I wouldnt be fully showing how much I love and care for her..
So yeah I think sex is very important in a relationship and should be based on love..But outside a relationship,well...getting laid is getting laid,do what ya gotta do =P

But regardless of my opinion,I still respect that people have different views and practice abstinence and whatnot..but I aint going into that.

 

[Fairee]

Now that I have your attention...

This thread was inspired by the discussion that started in one of DanTheBard's threads about love and sex.

I have noticed that many users here on The Escapists seem to regard sex (or at least the pre-marital kind) as something not important, needed or enjoyable in a relationship, or at least not as important as love.

While these are surely noble sentiments, it seems to me very stupid, or at least naive, to think that any relationship based on love can keep going without sex.

If in fact we can all agree that a relationship based solely on sex is doomed to fail, then surely one based solely on love is also doomed to the same fate. After all, man is a "carnal" animal.

I don't know where I'm going with this, I just wanted to know why here sex seems to be mostly looked down upon as something "dirty" and "unpure", while I for one think that it can be something beautiful.

Casual sex also seems to get a pretty bad rep, which I for one don't understand why.

/rant.

Ok, well I put that section in bold because I don't think that's at all true, and doesn't link with the rest of the OP. It's not that people on the Escapist see sex as dirty and unpure, it's just that they generally see other factors as more important in a relationship, like sharing interests and enjoying each other's company.

I personally think that as long as you are in a stable relationship sex is normal and a brilliant way of expressing the love you have for someone. As long as you're both mature enough to use protection or deal with the consequences if you don't, then you don't need to be married to have sex.

As for casual sex, I wouldn't be interested in it because I'd prefer sex to be a way of showing someone that I loved them and trusted them, rather than I was feeling turned on and they happened to be around.

 

[xXGeckoXx]

Well, I really don't understand why people care about it so much, or even want to have it, for that matter. It is disgusting, in actuality. I mean, all the bodily fluids, disease, and proximity to the anus 'n what not...
I'm stayin' a virgin until I find a lifelong mate who can make that sound appealing. (among other qualities of course.)

Let's see:
It feels great/second only to hard drugs
It is intimate.
Surely if you loved someone you'd want to be intimate?
No offence, but saying it's disgusting is more telling of your age than any actual truth of the matter.

No, you cannot deny that sex is disgusting. The only thing is, you have hormones that tell you to ignore that fact and enjoy it anyway. I don't take kindly to ageism, and considering your reasons for why sex is good, I stand by the idea that maturity is more important than age.

I cannot deny....How old are you. Please don't argue things you don't understand.

 

[Erana]

Well, I really don't understand why people care about it so much, or even want to have it, for that matter. It is disgusting, in actuality. I mean, all the bodily fluids, disease, and proximity to the anus 'n what not...
I'm stayin' a virgin until I find a lifelong mate who can make that sound appealing. (among other qualities of course.)

Let's see:
It feels great/second only to hard drugs
It is intimate.
Surely if you loved someone you'd want to be intimate?
No offence, but saying it's disgusting is more telling of your age than any actual truth of the matter.

No, you cannot deny that sex is disgusting. The only thing is, you have hormones that tell you to ignore that fact and enjoy it anyway. I don't take kindly to ageism, and considering your reasons for why sex is good, I stand by the idea that maturity is more important than age.

I cannot deny....How old are you. Please don't argue things you don't understand.

Read the whole thread before you go post, K?
If you can't be bothered reading through a sixteen page thread, then whatever you're going to say has likely already been said.

 

[Trivun]

Now that I have your attention...

This thread was inspired by the discussion that started in one of DanTheBard's threads about love and sex.

I have noticed that many users here on The Escapists seem to regard sex (or at least the pre-marital kind) as something not important, needed or enjoyable in a relationship, or at least not as important as love.

While these are surely noble sentiments, it seems to me very stupid, or at least naive, to think that any relationship based on love can keep going without sex.

If in fact we can all agree that a relationship based solely on sex is doomed to fail, then surely one based solely on love is also doomed to the same fate. After all, man is a "carnal" animal.

I don't know where I'm going with this, I just wanted to know why here sex seems to be mostly looked down upon as something "dirty" and "unpure", while I for one think that it can be something beautiful.



Casual sex also seems to get a pretty bad rep, which I for one don't understand why.

/rant.

Ok, well I put that section in bold because I don't think that's at all true, and doesn't link with the rest of the OP. It's not that people on the Escapist see sex as dirty and unpure, it's just that they generally see other factors as more important in a relationship, like sharing interests and enjoying each other's company.

I personally think that as long as you are in a stable relationship sex is normal and a brilliant way of expressing the love you have for someone. As long as you're both mature enough to use protection or deal with the consequences if you don't, then you don't need to be married to have sex.

As for casual sex, I wouldn't be interested in it because I'd prefer sex to be a way of showing someone that I loved them and trusted them, rather than I was feeling turned on and they happened to be around.

I have to say, I agree with this up until the 'casual sex' bit. Personally I have no problem with casual sex, I'd obviously prefer to have sex with someone I loved and cared deeply about in an actual relationship, however, I don't think there's anything wrong with casual sex itself.

As you said yourself, if you're both mature then you don't need to be married for sex. I understand you meant that as in sex in a relationship, but really it can apply to casual sex as well. If you and the other person are both mature enough to know what you're doing and agree, and use protection and whatnot, then you don't really need to be in a relationship for it.

Case in point, one night stands. If you're drunk then obviously there's a problem, but if say two friends decide they want to use each other for sex and they agree it's just sex, nothing more, then where's the problem? That said, I suppose there's always the risk of complications in said friendship, if one develops feelings for the other...

 

[Spacelord]

For gamer nerds, Escapists sure have a lot to say about sex. 16 PAGES!

 

[lazy_bum]

I see

Well I think of sex as an expression of your love for someone, I don't think I'd want to sleep with a person if I didn't really care for them.

I think of sex as an expression of how much I love having sex

you sir, are a legend. Seriously though, you dont have to love someone to have sex, or even care about them. Though that said i dont have sex with someone unless i have at least some sort of feelings towards them. Also sex=dirty how?

 

[uncle-ellis]

I took a course on women's biology. It was disgusting. And I wasn't talking about being repulsed by intimacy or the creation of life, I was talking about the fact that you would compare something to hard drugs.

And have you ever considered the idea that I am repulsed by sex and drugs not because of my age, but because I've seen some of how horrible and destructive both can be?

I don't get signals that tell me that there is goodness to be had in sex. All I see is the potential for pain, betrayal and heartbreak, which is a necessary toll for procreation. Sex can be intimate, but intimacy itself does not have to be sexual.

And sex is rarely a fit of passion. Don't lie to yourself and say such things. From what I have found from second-hand sources that don't rose-tint everything, its not really that great. It is about eleven minutes worth of something that may or may not be pleasurable, and is often awkward. Our society has further laden sex with shame, and you may have well ruined the relationship you once had with someone you care about. And people don't always have sex for sex, it is a filler, an attempt to deal with real life problems, much akin to worry-eating or drinking away one's cares.
Its like Disneyland. Everyone practically worships it as the ideal place for bliss and togetherness, but really, you're just sweaty, dirty, out a few hundred dollars, and you could have had as much fun from staying home and watching a movie.

Which of course spontaneously leads to this question: Have you ever had any?

Ya hear that, ***** got pwned.

 

[The Infamous Scamola]

Ya hear that, ***** got pwned.

If that is the case then call me Mr McPwnpants.

No wait... Dr McPwnpants.