So eh, what are the "modern ways" to get women these days?

[Vault101]

You know, I gotta be honest. The more and more society, human civilization, and the rest of the world go on...the worse things get. I accepted the fact that we're going backwards as a society, are becoming less and less intimate, caring, and overall human as a species and as a race. The 1990's attitude towards the open
nature of sexuality, the less courtship and traditional aspects involved...we've devolved into a bunch of whores who believe their sole purpose is to spread their genetic material. It sickens me.
With that being said, the dating scale has tipped so drastically and in a direction that "some people", myself namely, just don't fucking know what to do anymore. It's been...roughly the span of about seven years since I have last dated. This could be the offset of several key indicators and the knowledge that I am either ridiculously judgemental of other human beings, or in the end, am just a very unorthodox, authoritarian minded individual with an outsider's perspective on a multitude of issues and problems.

Now, before we all jump on the bandwagon and feed each other a bunch of meaningless drivel, overstated facts, and exaggerations of the "alpha male" stereotype to "win and fuck the *****", allow me to just simply state that...I really don't even know what the hell I want. I refuse to go through with the embarrassment stage of life again, don't know the damned script to it all, and am quite possibly one of the most vehement, vindictive, wrathful fucking people on the face of the earth because of how things have gone sour for me in the past with this. Let me just say I was in the military, it was a bad time...and oh dear God did things not end well.

Now, just a few basic facts about myself:

- Basic, thin, runner's build.
- Not a 10 out of 10, not a 6 out of 10 either.
- I am not one who gives a shit about getting deeply involved with another until I feel they are of merit and worth.
- My basic problem is "talking" to people. I just...can't fucking stand people.
- The last part comes with a very simple flaw: Those I seemingly wish to date or have an interest in dating (upon physical appearance, minut interaction at a cash register generally) seem to be the one's which are "out of my league" in the sense that they mentally view as someone of a lower standing...however I have the mental, insightful, deep, and otherwise "intellectual" skillset, plus that "dark, brooding" outsider appearance. No. Not the threatening type. More along the lines of just...being a bit closed off to people.
- In the end, my entire opinions and worldviews are shaped by the hellish, grueling, empirical experiences I have had.

Now. Without changing a single thing about myself or my social nature, and just "adding" a few things...tell me videogame nerds of the internet, what the hell should a nearly 26 year old virgin do? I am very open to comments, criticisms, judgements...but let's be CONSTRUCTIVE about it. That is my one condition.

Go ahead.
Ready, aim, fire.

......?

HA! you serious?

"backwards as a society?"

"we've devolved into a bunch of whores who believe their sole purpose is to spread their genetic material. It sickens me."

uhhh no just no

anyway its called CHANGE..thats way way of the world..the only certainty in the universe, and no epo0le are bad, we are apathetic at worse

Im sorry but it really makes me angry when peopel whine about "ohhhh the world is terrible"

no it fucking isnt..Im not saying your problems arnt bad you obviously have alot of issues, but the apocolypse isnt coming anytime soon

as for you dating status? well you jsut listed why somone wouldnt want to date you

just try and change....it sounds like you need to fidn somthing that makes you happy, and stick to that because we all like happy people

plus guys shouldnt blame society (or women) for their lack of ability to get into a relationship

 

[Vault101]

I can sympathize perfectly. Lately, women seem to have grown more cold, callous and calculating. The proportion of women who think they're amazing divas has skyrocketed, and they just don't know how fucking ugly they are. And by ugly, I mean their personality. I've rejected many. I've evolved a stuck-up-***** "filter" and don't even look at them anymore, even if they're showing more skin than a pig in a bin.

Another thing that is hard is the whole "equality" thing. I respect and want women to have the rights they have, I am very proud how we have fought for women's right especially here in my country.

But at some treshold, women seemed to stop wanting to be taken care of. I ended a relationship because I wasn't ever allowed to do the things men need to do: pay for things, spur of the moment gifts and do the "heavy" work.

I'm just resignated and don't think I'll involve myself with women any more. At this point I'm better off alone.

GOD DAMN IT!

women are NOT all the same!

Women are human beings...not aliens

I mean I could put this down to demographic but Im actually pretty alarmed by the people's attitudes here to women

 

[The Stonker]

Hit them with a club.
If that doesn't work.
Get a bigger club.

 

[Tharwen]

Out of college eh? Well I'd say, go to a club or something, a bar if you will. Don't come on to strong or to cheesy and if that doesn't work theres always those dating website.

The websites are fake. ALL OF THEM

It's a tiny amount of anecdotal evidence, I know, but someone I know met his girlfriend on a dating website and now they have a very strong relationship and live together so I disagree.

Of course, my experience of relationships is... limited. Any advice I give is probably a repeat of someone else's.

 

[mrwoo6]

...we've devolved into a bunch of whores who believe their sole purpose is to spread their genetic material. It sickens me.

the knowledge that I am either ridiculously judgemental of other human beings, or in the end, am just a very unorthodox, authoritarian minded individual with an outsider's perspective on a multitude of issues and problems.


- I am not one who gives a shit about getting deeply involved with another until I feel they are of merit and worth.
- My basic problem is "talking" to people. I just...can't fucking stand people.
- The last part comes with a very simple flaw: Those I seemingly wish to date or have an interest in dating (upon physical appearance, minut interaction at a cash register generally) seem to be the one's which are "out of my league" in the sense that they mentally view as someone of a lower standing...however I have the mental, insightful, deep, and otherwise "intellectual" skillset, plus that "dark, brooding" outsider appearance. No. Not the threatening type. More along the lines of just...being a bit closed off to people.
- In the end, my entire opinions and worldviews are shaped by the hellish, grueling, empirical experiences I have had.

Now. Without changing a single thing about myself or my social nature, and just "adding" a few things...tell me videogame nerds of the internet, what the hell should a nearly 26 year old virgin do?

Ready, aim, fire.

Sounds to me like your a being a bit of a dick;

plus that "dark, brooding" outsider appearance.
I just...can't fucking stand people.
am either ridiculously judgemental of other human beings, or in the end, am just a very unorthodox, authoritarian minded individual
I am not one who gives a shit about getting deeply involved with another until I feel they are of merit and worth.
In the end, my entire opinions and worldviews are shaped by the hellish, grueling, empirical experiences I have had.

and then, the clincher;

Now. Without changing a single thing about myself or my social nature, and just "adding" a few things...

I don't like most people I meet much either, but I certainly go around acting like I do. If there's one thing people can't stand, its people who are depressed and judgmental. People like to go out with people who are happy, light, and understanding of there partners faults. Unless your willing to change yourself, I don't think your going to have much luck finding either cheap meaning sex, witch ain't a bad thing, or a long term loving relationship.

You don't need a life long partner to be happy, and unleses you want to change yourself you may be happier staying the way you are.

 

[Leadfinger]

"This could be the offset of several key indicators and the knowledge that I am either ridiculously judgemental of other human beings, or in the end, am just a very unorthodox, authoritarian minded individual with an outsider's perspective on a multitude of issues and problems."
It might be that this attitude doesn't go down well with a potential date. Perhaps you should work on this, in particular the "ridiculously judgemental" and the "authoritarian minded."

 

[Tdc2182]

Amateurs, all of you.

 

[Angerwing]

My philosophy with women is the same as my philosophy as working as a salesman. Now, don't get me wrong, I'm not 'that guy'. But I go up to a customer, and I don't aim to sell a product. I'll help them with what they need to know, I'll chat to them, qualify them for what they need, then if we have that, I'll provide it to them. If they're not interested in buying today, or we don't have what they need, it doesn't matter. I may have improved my knowledge about something. I may have just talked to a really nice customer. I may have just talked to a really shitty customer. There's an old sales saying that I've heard, "Sometimes the most important sale you make is the one you don't make at all." You wouldn't believe the amount of customers I've had leave, then return at a later time because of my excellent service. Even if what they're purchasing isn't related to what I was talking to them about, that's what I get for being a professional and personable salesman.

If I see a nice looking girl, I'll talk to her. I won't focus on getting with her, but I'll just have a nice night. Hell, last Thursday, I went out clubbing with a friend of mine, and we started talking to these two attractive girls. Turns out she was doing the same degree as me at university, was very intelligent, very nice, and very funny. Found out she had a boyfriend. Whatever, I met a cool chick, and had a great time. Maybe one day, when she doesn't have a boyfriend, I'll ask her out to get a drink or something. Or not. Doesn't matter.

It's not a big deal, and people are people. They're the same as you or I. Just be a cool dude. Don't be arrogant, don't be a douchebag, because quality girls, the girls you're interested in, don't like that. The only girls you'll pull with that attitude is the trash you claim to hate.

And don't be arrogant about music. I don't really listen to club music, but that's not what you go out for. I've found that there is no more alienating of an experience than talking to a metal fan about music. So don't do that.

 

[AngloDoom]

[-Snip-]

... I am either ridiculously judgemental of other human beings, or in the end, am just a very unorthodox, authoritarian minded individual with an outsider's perspective on a multitude of issues and problems...

[-Snip-]

I really don't even know what the hell I want. I refuse to go through with the embarrassment stage of life again, don't know the damned script to it all, and am quite possibly one of the most vehement, vindictive, wrathful fucking people on the face of the earth because of how things have gone sour for me in the past with this.

Now, just a few basic facts about myself:


- I am not one who gives a shit about getting deeply involved with another until I feel they are of merit and worth.
- My basic problem is "talking" to people. I just...can't fucking stand people.
- The last part comes with a very simple flaw: Those I seemingly wish to date or have an interest in dating (upon physical appearance, minut interaction at a cash register generally) seem to be the one's which are "out of my league" in the sense that they mentally view as someone of a lower standing...however I have the mental, insightful, deep, and otherwise "intellectual" skillset, plus that "dark, brooding" outsider appearance. No. Not the threatening type. More along the lines of just...being a bit closed off to people.

There seems to be the problems. Overall it seems you are judgmental and unwilling to compromise and, despite saying you often fall for people out of your league, seem to think people just don't 'get' you - at least this is my opinion of you.

The best thing I can really say is just relax and actually give people a chance. You also seem to have avoided a lot of the necessary mistakes a lot of people make to actually appreciate human attention, all of which are things you'll just have to do in your own time on your own.

Simple steps seem to be:

1. Go to bars, pubs, clubs, hobbies, whatever floats your boat.
2. Make friends, talk to people, and don't view women as potentially 'dateable' or 'not dateable' when you're just about getting to know them.
3. Have the confidence to be funny and take risks which might fail.
4. Have a positive outlook. At least smile at lot.
5. Blame only yourself for your mistakes, but don't become self-pitying.
6. Put the effort into seeing people - regardless of gender or your motives - and you'll find somebody eventually.

 

[Zeema]

be nice and don't be rude

and don't be someone your not

simple

 

[WanderingBiscuits]

Treat them like a little sister upon first meeting.

WAIT! Here me out before the pitchforks. This is just from my experience.

The best success i have ever had is when i just fooled around a bit and didn't take myself too seriously. Having a good sense of humour, giving joke like jabs towards the one you are interested, teasing a wee bit [nothing too heavy] and later when they know you a bit more show acknowledgement and support by giving them a hug when they are a little depressed.It is to show that you're not just "that funny guy" she knows, you're also the one she can rely on when she is down.

I do feel its best to start friendship and then move on to a relationship.[from personal experience]

Nuther good one that might seem cliche but is very true is the phrase "treat them as you expect to be treated yourself". The kind of treatment you would like to get from someone give to the person you are interested.

Best Of luck!

 

[Fieldy409_v1legacy]

Well the invention of tranquiliser guns....before that you had to bash a woman over the head with a club to get her. Oh and the van to escape in is WAAAY more conveniant than dragging them home by the hair.

 

[Blow_Pop]

Buddy. No one here has the courage to say this, but I will.

Women don't want to date you because you're an abusive misogynistic prick.

-snip the rest of the post-

eh I woulda said it too....you just beat me to it. and...this.

Don't be sexist and tell us to make you sandwiches, Don't treat us like dirt, Spend time with us, and have a damn sense of humour.

if you want to break us from the pack, just walk straight up to us, we love confidence.

....But this might just be me.

me as well

Same way as always. Beat them on the head with a club and drag them back to your cave.

Okay, well maybe not exactly the same, but I'm pretty sure that clubs are involved at some point.

Well I normally start by following them home whilst smelling a strand of their hair lost from a week before, then when their sleeping I write "I see you " all over their walls.

It definitely gets their attention...

What?

you two crack me up with those :]

The captcha is "Respect Me".

I think there's a connection between it and this thread ... O_e

I think maybe you're right

You know, I gotta be honest. The more and more society, human civilization, and the rest of the world go on...the worse things get. I accepted the fact that we're going backwards as a society, are becoming less and less intimate, caring, and overall human as a species and as a race. The 1990's attitude towards the open nature of sexuality, the less courtship and traditional aspects involved...we've devolved into a bunch of whores who believe their sole purpose is to spread their genetic material. It sickens me.

Not all have adopted that mode of thinking. I am open about sexuality however I have standards. And one of the top ones of my list of things I look for is to be courted.

With that being said, the dating scale has tipped so drastically and in a direction that "some people", myself namely, just don't fucking know what to do anymore. It's been...roughly the span of about seven years since I have last dated. This could be the offset of several key indicators and the knowledge that I am either ridiculously judgemental of other human beings, or in the end, am just a very unorthodox, authoritarian minded individual with an outsider's perspective on a multitude of issues and problems.

I've never really known what to do dating wise. Though mostly its because most guys utterly disgust me and I can't really go out on dates with them.... It could also be because you come off as a pretentious asshole.

I really don't even know what the hell I want. I refuse to go through with the embarrassment stage of life again, don't know the damned script to it all, and am quite possibly one of the most vehement, vindictive, wrathful fucking people on the face of the earth because of how things have gone sour for me in the past with this.

Most of us don't know what the hell we want. We have an idea of things we like or may want but in general don't know. Life is a series of embarrassments you just gotta learn to suck it up and deal with it. You know life experiences will change you as well they should but if you act like this upfront then yeah it will drive women away. FAR AWAY.

Let me just say I was in the military, it was a bad time...and oh dear God did things not end well.

that makes me curious as to what happened?

Now, just a few basic facts about myself:

- Basic, thin, runner's build.
- Not a 10 out of 10, not a 6 out of 10 either.
- I am not one who gives a shit about getting deeply involved with another until I feel they are of merit and worth.
- My basic problem is "talking" to people. I just...can't fucking stand people.
- The last part comes with a very simple flaw: Those I seemingly wish to date or have an interest in dating (upon physical appearance, minut interaction at a cash register generally) seem to be the one's which are "out of my league" in the sense that they mentally view as someone of a lower standing...however I have the mental, insightful, deep, and otherwise "intellectual" skillset, plus that "dark, brooding" outsider appearance. No. Not the threatening type. More along the lines of just...being a bit closed off to people.
- In the end, my entire opinions and worldviews are shaped by the hellish, grueling, empirical experiences I have had.

The problem here is that you say you can't stand people. Do you possess the social skills to at least pretend that you can when you have to be around them? Honestly I can't stand most people but I possess the ability to act like I can stand them. Also helps when looking for a job. I'm a cynical heartless *****. I do have my soft side but you have to work to earn my trust for me to show it to you. Reason for that is most guys I've dated have been complete and utter assholes. And for the record, my "type" is tall, skinny, nerdy, geeky, pale white guys with glasses who have a bloody personality. So appearance isn't everything.

Now. Without changing a single thing about myself or my social nature, and just "adding" a few things...tell me videogame nerds of the internet, what the hell should a nearly 26 year old virgin do? I am very open to comments, criticisms, judgements...but let's be CONSTRUCTIVE about it. That is my one condition.

Go ahead.
Ready, aim, fire.

There is nothing we can tell you that won't be classified as changing yourself or your social nature. If you "add" to it as you say it is still change. Women still do like to be courted. Some just choose to act like whores...but that's because they are. But not all women should be treated as such.

Simplest advice:
Confidence, not to be mistaken for arrogance. Be confident about yourself but not too over the top as to actually be arrogant. Most of us hate it when guys are arrogant because it usually means they are assholes and that's kind of the way you come off in your post.

Treat us as people. Have a bloody conversation with us. Find out our interests. If they mesh with yours try asking if you guys can hang out again. Maybe a date. Get her number. We aren't an alien species.

Also, on the topic of the music you listen to, I listen to symphonic metal and european metal. I feel your pain on the clubs not playing it however, I don't go to clubs at all. Ever. After the incident 5 years ago. If you have to, talk to people over the internet and find someone close to you that shares interests with you that you can manage to like.

Contrary to popular belief, we women aren't some bizarre alien lifeform. Do you have friends, OP? I would assume so. And how did you make those friends? Probably by going up and having a conversation with them. So, simply put, do the same with any potential date. Talk to her. If you have an interesting conversation, ask for her phone number at the end of it. Or ask if she wants to go out to dinner sometime. Or whatever. Just do something to arrange some other time to meet. It's as simple as that.

And I agree with her. Do you have friends? Because if so, they would know you best and who knows? Might be able to hook you up with a girl.

EDIT:

I can sympathize perfectly. Lately, women seem to have grown more cold, callous and calculating. The proportion of women who think they're amazing divas has skyrocketed, and they just don't know how fucking ugly they are. And by ugly, I mean their personality. I've rejected many. I've evolved a stuck-up-***** "filter" and don't even look at them anymore, even if they're showing more skin than a pig in a bin.

Another thing that is hard is the whole "equality" thing. I respect and want women to have the rights they have, I am very proud how we have fought for women's right especially here in my country.

But at some treshold, women seemed to stop wanting to be taken care of. I ended a relationship because I wasn't ever allowed to do the things men need to do: pay for things, spur of the moment gifts and do the "heavy" work.

I'm just resignated and don't think I'll involve myself with women any more. At this point I'm better off alone.

Not ALL women. I was raised to let a guy take care of me. However most guys that I have personally met weren't raised that way. I don't necessarily want a guy to always feel like he HAS to pay for everything and do all the heavy work. The way I work it is usually I pay this time you pay next time kind of deal. It works with my friends at least. But really I do want a guy who is a gentleman. With that said I also don't want a guy who expects me to stay home and clean house. Not the kind of girl I am. I HAVE to have a job outside of the house otherwise I get cabin fever and go stir crazy. Don't give up hope yet. We do exist but like actual gentleman we are a rare and dying breed. Though I partially blame society for that. Society and how people are raising their kids.

 

[Nimzabaat]

Buddy. No one here has the courage to say this, but I will.

Women don't want to date you because you're an abusive misogynistic prick. When they were seven years younger, they didn't understand or see the signs... so they'd put up with your shit. Women in their late 20s, early 30s... they've grown up. They've dated pricks. They've lived with pricks. They've had long and horrible relationships with pricks. And they see you, and the first thing they're going to think is... 'Oh fuck. Another bitter, self-absorbed, judgemental prick.'

Your opening paragraph isn't describing your problem of feeling lonely... it's blaming society for it. It's not society's fault you immediately think that everyone is whoring around. Who the fuck wants to date anyone who's willing to date them, and then thinks they're a whore for saying yes?

You need a modicum of empathy.

With that being said, the dating scale has tipped so drastically and in a direction that "some people", myself namely, just don't fucking know what to do anymore.

Grow the fuck up. That's what you do. The problem isn't that 'things changed.' It's that you didn't bother to learn fuck all.

It's been...roughly the span of about seven years since I have last dated. This could be the offset of several key indicators and the knowledge that I am either ridiculously judgemental of other human beings, or in the end, am just a very unorthodox, authoritarian minded individual with an outsider's perspective on a multitude of issues and problems.

Your outsider's perspective is like watching a building with blacked out windows trying to tell others what he thinks is going on inside. You are clueless.

I really don't even know what the hell I want. I refuse to go through with the embarrassment stage of life again, don't know the damned script to it all, and am quite possibly one of the most vehement, vindictive, wrathful fucking people on the face of the earth because of how things have gone sour for me in the past with this.

Seek therapy. You're not even comfortable with yourself, and you have the potential to take this clear self-abuse you're imposing on yourself... and turning it on to your woman. That's not good, mate. Smart women... women who respect themselves... women you CLAIM to want to be with... can see through this shit and avoid it because they give a shit about themselves. They KNOW you'll hurt them and in a very bad way.

Seek. Help.

Ninja'd (Okay this is more eloquent and kinder than I would have been). As to the "be your self" thing... That seems to be your entire problem. So absolutely seek professional help.

 

[similar.squirrel]

Your ego: castrate it. Actually, I can do that for you: You're a 26 year old virgin.
Lose the misanthropy, it's immature and useless.
If you're not prepared to change, then nothing will happen.

On a parting note: If you 'can't fucking stand people', then you have no business putting your dick inside them.

 

[Yuki_Seele]

I'de say Respect them (obviously why would you not?) Be yourself, try to make them like you for who you are and not based on some fake persona. Don't make stupid sexist comments (even if you don't mean it seriously) it just makes you sound like an idiot eitherway, Ive tryed all this stuff and still haven't got a girlfriend and im 20 years old... But useing this method im sure it will get me to be with someone really great in the long run, the wait will be worth it.