So you like a girl...

[Sebenko]

I prefer over some sort of IM, simply because I tend to hit on girls a lot face-to-face, so it's kind of become my personality- "oh ha, sebenko, you're funny, I saw you pull the same jokes with the rest of the girls, and some of the guys." and it's easier for me to say I'm serious that way.

And it works, if you were wondering. And do not fuck around deciding. Go for it. You get it out there before someone willing to say it first does it. It's happened to me, and, I'm a bit ashamed to say, I've done it to other people when I knew they were interested.

 

[KingGolem]

Well, you might as well keep that up for as long as you can. Because if you change your mind all you will ever be is some lonely old man trying to get some, having missed out on the chance of being a young, attractive, virile man trying to enjoy one of the better things that life has to offer.

That's exactly what I'm sick and tired of: everybody assuming that they know me better than I know myself.

I have taken a vow of unchastity, guided by 2 philosophies. There is no such thing as right or wrong as long as no one gets hurt and to truely succeed in life is to experience it from all possible perspectives. Neither one are achievable in a practical sense, at least not very likely, but the priciple is to open yourself up to enjoy as many new experiences as possible while trying not to cause any undue suffering to those around you. As long as you are enjoying things and not being selfish, a prick, or downright cruel, I dont see the need to limit yourself from enjoying what life has to offer.

Out of curiousity, do you think you are going to get any extra credit in this life or the next for your choice? Because at 20 you do still have a chance to change your mind and really enjoy things. Some women are actually turned on by (young) virgins.

"Vow of unchastity." Heh, that's a new one. I'm afraid you are incorrect in your assumption that my vow of chastity is based in morality or religion. I am an atheist, and believe that it is a weakness of character to make decisions based on anything but logic. There are tremendous risks associated with procreation, chief among them one's choice of partner. I cannot expect to find a woman who agrees with me completely or submits wholly to my will, and as such any relationship will entail compromise. I absolutely refuse to compromise my own nature. Without a relationship, I am free to be myself.

Another problem that prevents me from pursuing a relationship is that I refuse to serve anything other than my own self interests. I have heard it said that being in a relationship requires the ability to put others ahead of yourself, and I believe that to do so is folly. I am the most important person to myself, and I intend to keep it that way.

There is also the problem of starting a family, which is the logical conclusion of a successful relationship. I don't intend to do that either. As a woman cannot be controlled, in all likelihood she will abandon me and use the repulsive system of divorce to take half of everything I own. I can excercise a greater degree of control over my children, but there is still a chance that they may grow up to betray me, and be disgraces to my name. Keeping the children under control would be even harder when having to compromise my ideas of child raising with a woman.

With all these dangers compounded together, I see relationships as an unacceptably risky venture. I will never have sex, either. Sex carries plenty of risks on its own (STD's, accidental pregnancy, and so forth), and the legal variety is usually acquired through a relationship. I am capable of relieving my sexual tensions without the aid of another person, so I see no need for intercourse. On the whole, relationships and sexual intercourse are a completely unecessary evil, hence my vow of chastity.

 

[Troublesome Lagomorph]

The one time I did it, it was over IM. I think I'd prefer to man up and do it face to face, though, if I were to do it again.

 

[Zaverexus]

Face to face is always best. My current girlfriend and I pretty much ended up asking each other out at the same time, which was interesting.

 

[renegade7]

I think face to face is much better, since it makes a better impression...also I'm kinda old fashioned that way I guess...to me, I think it says a lot that you're willing to overcome your nerves rather than hide behind a screen.

 

[Zaverexus]

Well, you might as well keep that up for as long as you can. Because if you change your mind all you will ever be is some lonely old man trying to get some, having missed out on the chance of being a young, attractive, virile man trying to enjoy one of the better things that life has to offer.

That's exactly what I'm sick and tired of: everybody assuming that they know me better than I know myself.

I have taken a vow of unchastity, guided by 2 philosophies. There is no such thing as right or wrong as long as no one gets hurt and to truely succeed in life is to experience it from all possible perspectives. Neither one are achievable in a practical sense, at least not very likely, but the priciple is to open yourself up to enjoy as many new experiences as possible while trying not to cause any undue suffering to those around you. As long as you are enjoying things and not being selfish, a prick, or downright cruel, I dont see the need to limit yourself from enjoying what life has to offer.

Out of curiousity, do you think you are going to get any extra credit in this life or the next for your choice? Because at 20 you do still have a chance to change your mind and really enjoy things. Some women are actually turned on by (young) virgins.

"Vow of unchastity." Heh, that's a new one. I'm afraid you are incorrect in your assumption that my vow of chastity is based in morality or religion. I am an atheist, and believe that it is a weakness of character to make decisions based on anything but logic. There are tremendous risks associated with procreation, chief among them one's choice of partner. I cannot expect to find a woman who agrees with me completely or submits wholly to my will, and as such any relationship will entail compromise. I absolutely refuse to compromise my own nature. Without a relationship, I am free to be myself.

Another problem that prevents me from pursuing a relationship is that I refuse to serve anything other than my own self interests. I have heard it said that being in a relationship requires the ability to put others ahead of yourself, and I believe that to do so is folly. I am the most important person to myself, and I intend to keep it that way.

There is also the problem of starting a family, which is the logical conclusion of a successful relationship. I don't intend to do that either. As a woman cannot be controlled, in all likelihood she will abandon me and use the repulsive system of divorce to take half of everything I own. I can excercise a greater degree of control over my children, but there is still a chance that they may grow up to betray me, and be disgraces to my name. Keeping the children under control would be even harder when having to compromise my ideas of child raising with a woman.

With all these dangers compounded together, I see relationships as an unacceptably risky venture. I will never have sex, either. Sex carries plenty of risks on its own (STD's, accidental pregnancy, and so forth), and the legal variety is usually acquired through a relationship. I am capable of relieving my sexual tensions without the aid of another person, so I see no need for intercourse. On the whole, relationships and sexual intercourse are a completely unecessary evil, hence my vow of chastity.

Hey, Sheldon Cooper, is that you?

Ayn Rand is more like it. To each his own, but Jeeze...

 

[KingGolem]

Hey, Sheldon Cooper, is that you?

That guy from the Big Bang Theory? That's a fictional character, as you know, but I do relate to him the most. It makes for some uncomfortable viewing, as he is often written as the deserving victim of circumstances. It is true that we both highly value logic and exhibit antisocial tendencies, and I would like to point out that I don't have a problem. It is society that has a problem with me, and I tend not to care what they think.

 

[manic_depressive13]

-snip-

That was pretty funny. Ever met RAK the Undead? I have a feeling you two would get along great.

 

[KingGolem]

That was pretty funny. Ever met RAK the Undead? I have a feeling you two would get along great.

What was pretty funny? Were you under the impression that I was joking? I assure you, I am being completely serious.

And no, I am not familiar with RAK the Undead.

 

[OmniscientOstrich]

Don't drink, it'll hinder you in the long run; talk to people without being too drunk and you'll be far better in the confidence/fear of rejection department. Timing's a *****, though. I say you should toss it out the window and ask them out on a date when you're next alone, just stay away from calling it a date and you should be decent. If you get the let's just be friends talk then you gave it a shot and can approach that cutie at the bar you mentioned earlier with a clear conscience that you aren't hurting them or your relationship.

"You never know what life might throw into your lap if you open your legs and embrace it."

I get the impression that quote is somewhat paraphrased. :3 Anyway, thanks for the advice, I'll try to keep some of those things in mind, in particular I think avoiding the word date might help to ease into things and I guess I just need to go for it more with the bar scenario, I haven't really got anything to lose there. Nerves are a ***** too, but I guess I just need practice.

 

[The Rookie Gamer]

Ask them. The golden rule is that yes means yes and no means yes.

I don't know if I should trust the person with the Princest Molestia avatar...

OT: Ask her out, but not straight up saying you want to take her on a date. Be casual, ask her out to the usual(dinner, movies, etc...) and don't act nervous.

 

[Vanguard_Ex]

How do you deal with it? Do you tell them face to face or over text? Do you go for it and ask them out, or keep it quiet and hope they like you as well? What have you done in the past?

Me, I prefer to tell them face to face, as doing it over text or Facebook doesn't make me feel good about myself and I feel less manly. I personally like to feel that they have to kind of like me in the first place but sometimes, I lack the courage to tell them when I want to because I get really nervous and can't think straight. My last girlfriend asked me out over Facebook which wasn't very ideal but meh.
Share tales and experiences and tips as well if you want to


EDIT 1: Also, for the ladies out there, if your heterosexual, tell us about lads instead.

I've found that if there's a real chance of trying things out and if you've got chemistry, it just kind of...happens. You don't usually have to put a load of effort and thought in, things should just kind of flow into a relationship. But to actually answer your question, face to face is always better to establish things with. If it all starts with talking over the internet things can be really awkward when you actually meet up with them.

 

[tjbond911]

I'm wondering the same thing

 

[Condor219]

The first girl told me she was moving out of state (we were good friends, came up casually) the day I'd built up enough courage to decide to ask her out in person (which I realize is the most effective way to do it).

The second girl I crushed on for roughly 2.5 years before finding out that she had a habit of leading others on, and I realized I was one of those people. Never got to ask her out (hoo boy could she rebound fast, she went through boyfriends like they were being thrown into a wood chipper) but my preferred method to woo her was through text (I'm a mess irl as opposed to in text, when I am given time to think about what I'm going to say).

Currently, I'm too shy to ask out the girl I like (which is following the norm for me). She's single, but I rarely see her anymore, and I'm not sure she likes me romantically.

 

[Jenitals]

I wouldn't tell a guy because I'd never have the self-confidence. It's my firm belief that if a guy doesn't tell then he doesn't like. The idea that the man tells the woman he likes her is the only traditional view I hold towards relationships only becaise it's so much easier that way

However, as hypocritical as this may sound, I'd find it cowardly if someone told me they liked me over facebook or via text. Even worse if the guy seemed confident in the first place I'd find it rude and demeaning.

 

[Psychedelic Spartan]

Let her know the old fashioned way with a bottle of wine, a length of rope, some ductape, and a bottle of chloroform

My god! It worked! I even got laid! No, no I kid, just work up the confidence, and say it to her plain and simple.

 

[Denariax]

Sandor wins guys, pack up the trucks

But in all seriousness; is it weird to like someone you're helping on Facebook regardless of not knowing the other person? Call it nerdy but I like to extend the stories I think up through roleplay, and knowing that I have seen the person and how they act, is it still weird? I have no idea.