so... you've started an evil empire?

[Riddle78]

Location: British Columbia,or PEI. Both are easily defended (BC has mountains on one side,ocean on the other,an arctic wasteland to the north,and a nation with the worst military to the south,PEI is a small island,making it a tactical fortress. It also has fertile land for farming.)
Motive: Unifacation of the world under one banner.
Plot: Annexation of each of the world's capitol cities and control of their infrastructure.
Theme: Mechs straight from the Inner Sphere.

That's right,I'll conquer the Earth with Mechs. Standard infantry will be in Uziels,snipers in Belials. Catapult Mechs used as artillery platforms,and my generals shall pilot Mad Cats. Heavy weapons platforms shall be Atlas mechs and I shall have a Nova Cat. Special forces will be using Elemental Power Armour.

 

[Something Amyss]

I'd like to tell you I had some elaborate scheme for taking over the world, but I'd probably just nick Apple's business model and throw in some laser cats.

 

[Sleepingzombie]

We seem to think alike; I have the motives(we both have normal military forces). you have the logistics and plans to realise them.
May I offer a bid to contract your forces services?
. . .we have some work to do.

 

[DustyDrB]

I'm going to steal all the cheese in the world and put it all into a giant ball. Then I'm going to roll it over Los Angeles. Let's see Jack Bauer stop the combine forces of assorted unrefrigerated cheeses.

imagines a new season of 24...
-A dark warehouse somewhere in the California countryside. A custodial worker from a local zoo sits in the dark room tied handcuffed to a toilet...
Jack Bauer: Dammit! We're running out of time! I need you to tell me the location of all the city's lemur's or the Mega Cheeseball will destroy us all!

Worker: I swear, I don't know anything! Please, if I knew I would have told you after you broke both of my knees and waterboarded my cat!

Jack: You have 5 seconds to tell me, or Mr. Kitty McFluffles goes in for another dunk and this time he may not come back up. 5... 4...

Worker: No! You wouldn't!

Jack: We're past the point of guessing what I wouldn't do. We need those lemurs to eat the cheese. 3...

Worker: The Muslims took the lemurs!

Jack: No, they were the bad guys in 5 seasons already and we have to give them a rest. 2...

Worker: I don't know!!! No, no, don't!

Jack: 1...

Worker: NOOO!!!

End Scene.

 

[Thedarkness77]

Motive is to tie everyone up in the world and force them to play superman 64 every hour on the hour of every day then break into all the banks in the world just to burn the money i could for fire wood. The person who survives the superman 64 torture will get the honer of being my right hand man then i will make my empire that streches the entire earth.

 

[Paksenarrion]

Build an underwater city, work on my own private space program, colonize the Moon, create orbital colonies, colonize Mars, mine the gas giants, mine/colonize the asteroid belt, etc...

 

[wolf92]

I'd also post a copy of the evil overlord list in every room of my evil layer, lest I forget the important facts

Not every room surely? Then your minions would know that you didn't really care for heir wellfare and that it was just a show because that list says you should.

BTW, MY Ebil Empire would be exteremely nice and focus on a semi communist society. Everything is state monitered and prices can be altered for all main goods by my government (eg. water, Petrol, X-BOX 360s). But only rarely, and if companies are driving prices too high for most people to afford. It will be an ever expanding and highly militaristic utopia. If it works
out.

I'll hire French minions, so they won't be able to read. I speak French, so it'll all work out

 

[Fallen-Angel Risen-Demon]

Mechs... Lots and lots of mechs...
And music...
WAIT EVEN BETTER!
Mechs that can shoot blast of sound energy that kill things!
Fuck yeah!
Motives?
...
Mechs?

 

[Benn_Walden]

i would take over the world in the name of me and keep all the worlds current leaders in charge so i dont have to do much, but they have to pass major things with me. i will have my own isalnd... i may as well colonise Tasmania, nothing much there. i will wall of the island and have a giant army and navy and nuclear missiles and submarines. i will have my own satellite capable of shooting down nuclear weapons converging on my island incase someone tries to attack me. as for me , i will dress as Sauron from lord of the rings and just either do what i do at the moment , or kill people for fun.

 

[MrJKapowey]

I'll hire French minions, so they won't be able to read. I speak French, so it'll all work out

Are you sure that the French minions will work out? Why not hire drunken Russians?
I'm going to do that, Learn one phrase to get them to attack
"They've got your vodka!"
"Они получили вашу водку!"
"Oni poluchili vashu vodku!"
(yes I used Google Translate, No I don't speak Russian past 'Da')

 

[Angerwing]

Build a giant metal compound/temple deep inside the South American jungle, preferably in a valley, built into a mountainside. My men would be very heavily armed, and I would have a harem of beautiful and well-paid women from all across the world. I would slowly but surely take out and replace the surrounding governments. Preferably starting with the weaker, less stable nations. Soon I'd rule the entire South American continent, then move on the US. I'd bomb their military bases into powder, then I would secure the major cities. I'd be a harsh, but fair ruler. My initial force of revolutionaries would all hold high positions in my vastly expanded military force. Canada would shortly follow.

With both American continents conquered, I would attempt to ally myself with China, to capture Europe and Africa, with them taking the rest of Asia. With half of the world under each of our control, I'd then secure Australia, and live out my days as ruler of the Empire of the West. I'd then have each country run itself like it probably would normally, but with my own rule being final. I'd increase military presence in South America and Africa, to crush the drug trade/criminal gangs.

I'd have my personal compound/military village in another valley, surrounded by impenetrable walls, hundreds of guards and advanced weapon systems. I'd also build a mech for myself. My throne room would have one main entrance, and one secret exit. The exit would drop my entire living space (my bedroom/harem/gaming room/supply room would be an airtight detachable pod) into a tram system, which would rush it underground and under the water, all the way to my original stronghold, which would be a bustling city, as the new capital of the Western World. The original base would now be a giant metal bunker, the size of several stadiums, and loaded with an enormous military force. I would then seal off the tram system, and flood it with lethal gas, the entire length of the tunnel.

 

[Ninonybox_v1legacy]

hire an army of 10,000 and storm the white house....force them to make me ruler for life and then take over the world.

 

[SweEscaspist]

I would build my evil empire on Island far far away....
And then I would build in a unremovable TV in every home and play M. Night Shyamalans movie The Last Airbender 24/7 because that movie suck! Oh, and you wouldn't be able to turn the TV off. Or mute the sound..
Mohahahahaha!

 

[wolf92]

I'll hire French minions, so they won't be able to read. I speak French, so it'll all work out

Are you sure that the French minions will work out? Why not hire drunken Russians?
I'm going to do that, Learn one phrase to get them to attack
"They've got your vodka!"
"Они получили вашу водку!"
"Oni poluchili vashu vodku!"
(yes I used Google Translate, No I don't speak Russian past 'Da')

But then you have to keep them drunk, and buying alcohol every day would get tedious

 

[MrJKapowey]

get someone else to buy it. Or hire some other country's people to work for you (who stereotypically have good combat characteristics): The fiery Scottish, The Precise Germans, The excessively honourable and sporting British or the EXTREMELY fast French (when going backwards).

Or use robotics (like Liberty Prime or Security bots from Fallout) That's my plan.

 

[blackflare]

id create an army of hot girls in short miniskirts that have to obey my every whim and slowly take over the world with there hotness and my brillant psychotic pervertic mind.

 

[The Wykydtron]

First I would play this song and give an epic speech of awesome

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gMyYHAkLvlE&feature=related

Then I would probably order Bioware to hurry up with Mass Effect 3 and tell Value to tease the Halflife fanboys moar by giving a release date for episode 3 then slowly push it back every few months. Then go play some gaems with no interuption.

 

[lex.nero]

There would only be one motive to starting an evil empire

Because... because... I wanna be the very best, like no one ever was *dun dun dun*
To capture them is my real test to maim them is my cause!
I will travel across the land, searching far and wide
Teach Buddhist monks to understand, they can't run or hide!
Buddhist monks, gotta catch 'em all.
Why can't you see? You know it's my destiny
Buddhist monks
Oh, you're my best man, in a world we must reprimand
Buddhist monks, gotta catch 'em all
My heart is black and bluuee, malevolence pulls me through
You can't beat me when I beat you
Buddhist monks
Gotta catch 'em all, gotta catch 'em all!
BUDDHIST MONKS!

 

[arbiter592]

Cut away sweden from Europe and weld it to the Us praying that they shake some sense into us. If they dont, let them see the POWER OF THE DARK SIDE