Somebody died of spontaneous combustion in Ireland...

[Atmos Duality]

Translation: "DERP! We can't find the source of the fire!"

I'm always highly dubious of spontaneous combustion theories.
People don't burst into flames for no reason.

It was your avatar that burned him to death, wasn't it?

I...er...mayb-NO!!
I mean. It was an accide-, er, tragedy. Yes. A tragedy. That he burned. For no discernible reason.

 

[drbarno]

I think I know what happened

Spoiler

though really it would be a painful way to go.

 

[loc978]

So wait, this guy wasn't the mayor of Warsaw?

...next thing you'll tell me is that it's raining cod somewhere in Belgium...

On a serious note, I have nothing to add, really... just had to make the reference with subverted subjects and locations.

 

[TheDooD]

Spontaneous combustion in Ireland, was there alcohol involved that's ALL I want to know.

 

[emeraldrafael]

That that man was too manly for a heart attack or natural causes and he'll likely be in a cracked article soon.

 

[kickassfrog]

Translation: "DERP! We can't find the source of the fire!"

I'm always highly dubious of spontaneous combustion theories.
People don't burst into flames for no reason.

There is a reason. We just don't know what it is yet.

Also, I theoretically take offence, as I generally tell strangers in nightclubs I'm Irish.

 

[Zeekar]

No identifiable source of ignition.

Right next to a fireplace.

Derp.

I get it that they already determined that the fireplace wasn't the source, but doesn't it seem more likely that they were just wrong about that? Oh forget it, SPONTANEOUS COMBUSTION!

 

[krazykidd]

It makes me think about the potential for the reaction this would get if it happened in public, or if it happened to someone on tv, or if it happened to someone famous! Or if it happened in public on TV to a famous person, could you imagine how weird that would be?

Do you realize how popular a video of justin bieber spontaneously combusting during an interview with his fans would be? Also i wonder if spontaneous combustion is a valid method of death for the deathnote.

 

[Epicspoon]

Well what with their inherently high blood alcohol levels...

I'd be offended by that but I'm too busy having a drunken brawl with my step father.

Anywho, this is pretty cool. No offense or callousness meant but I'd sure like to die by spontaneous combustion.

I am currently picturing some sort of huge, mushroom-cloud explosion though.

Spontaneous combustion is so boring. Im gonna die when a ninja chucks a throwing knife into my heart but survive only to have the knife be struck by lightning, first making my heart explode and THEN setting me on fire.

 

[thebobmaster_v1legacy]

TOASTY!

That was awesome. I hereby reward you with an Internet cookie.

As for the story, I guess he found out why you don't piss off Charlie McGee.

 

[riverand]

Just read the article to my husband. He suspects "death by fart."

 

[Abedeus]

From the article:

Deaths attributed by some to "spontaneous combustion" occur when a living human body is burned without an apparent external source of ignition.

Guess spontaneous combustion sounds better than "we failed at our job and have no idea why this dude burnt".

I think it's cause humans have a lot of fat. Fat burns easily, and anything that is a fuel necessary for spont. combustion will be gone in a matter of minutes ;p

 

[Alxast45]

And thats why you must always fear global warming...

 

[Macheteswordgun]

I'm going to quote the planeswalker Chandra from Magic: The Gathering and say:

"Spontaneous combustion is a myth. If you catch on fire, somebody wanted you to."

Also...

I guess you can say....
/sunglasses
He went out with a bang!

More like in a blaze of glory...


.... YEEEEEAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!

Well his friends always said he had an....
/sunglasses
EXPLOSIVE PERSONALITY

Well, aren't you two just...
*puts on flame-retardant sunglasses*
...on fire.

If were were any more on fire we would be...
/sunglasses and anti troll spray
FLAMERS

YEEEEEEEEEEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

 

[StealthyNinja]

Heard about this earlier, thought it might have been made up, but, spontaneous combbustion is just not something I would have imagined happening here.

 

[Saviordd1]

I guess you can say....
/sunglasses
He went out with a bang!
YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

All humor aside thats very interesting to say the least

Fixed it for you.

OT: That must have been hard for the neighbors to understand

 

[Thyunda]

Interesting...to say the least. I think the strangest thing is that the only fire damage elsewhere was on the ceiling and the floor around him. Surely if the blaze was ignited by a spark from the open fireplace, the carpet or the furniture would have burned up too? And, wouldn't something like this have happened more frequently? I have an open fireplace at my parents' house, and something like this has never happened. The other point is that I doubt he randomly lay down next to the fire...if he was doing it for warmth, he'd have most of his body next to it, not just his head, so he'd been elsewhere in the room when he combusted.

I don't want to say that he spontaneously combusted, but at the same time, I don't agree with people sitting here and insisting that the only people that believe in spontaneous combustion are scientists and forensic detectives who just want to save their career. There are inexplicable things in this world of ours. Cot death remains a mystery. I see no reason why current science is unable to explain why people just set alight.

 

[Death God]

Me and my friends always joked around about spontaneous combustion, now... huh. I think something is up more than anyone is willing to admit.