Stupid names that parents give their children...

[Starke]

My psychotic ex was absolutely convinced she was going to name our son Ember Phoenix.

 

[Starke]

i met a woman who named her daughter Female (she pronounced it fee-mall-E). she said she initially couldn't think of a name and when she first saw her in the crib at the hospital with the word "female" at the base of the crib, and thought it would be "neat" to name her that.

i wanted to smack her.

I feel your pain man. Who the hell in their right mind thinks that such an idea is 'neat'?!

This and Male (MALL-eh) are pretty common in certain circles. Usually the issue is something along the lines of, not understanding the English language at the time.

 

[dex-dex]

all i can think of is lewis black's bit with stupid children's names

my fave from that is abcde

 

[CloakedOne]

Skylar. a friend's ex-wife named her bastard DAUGHTER that. Poor kid.

 

[dorkette1990]

Marajunadawn- and that's just her first name.
Kroger- its a grocery chain in Southeastern United States.
A teacher from my high school swear she taught a set of twins named Orangejello and Lemanjello.
Carlos Mencia swears that there were children named Toprameneesha and Usnavy. 'Course, he is a comedian so I take what he says with a massive grain of salt.
There is a set of brothers in New York City named Winner (oldest) and Loser (youngest). Loser is a police officer (sergeant or captain I think) and Winner frequently visits his brother on the job.
Also, my girlfriend and I have talked about naming our first son Manfred, but we aren't big fans of our future children and aren't planning on having them, so we can talk about fucking around with their names as much as we want.

On a hilarious coincidence with names, there was a woman who enlisted with the US Navy with
the last name Guzzler. This made the appropriate way to address her: Seaman Guzzler.

I knew Orangejello and Lemonjello! They were fosterkids because their parents were crackheads and CPS took them away.


Also, my cousin was named Sky High Goetz (goetz is pronounced gets), so on applications, he was Goetz, Sky High. We renamed him skylar...

 

[Sir_Tor]

My friends know a guy whose last name is Hofacker.

 

[sam13lfc]

Red Roses, Baby Bear and Betty Butterfly.

Seriously, these are my neighbours' kids' names.

Yeah.

 

[Durgiun]

Dick is a terrible name. Imagine what kids with that name go through in school.

But in high school if you're hung like a donkey then the name has absolutely not negative connotations at all.

 

[Mechsoap]

i know a kid named ''earth''

of course as a normal i facepalmed it and moved on

 

[rockera]

new york...first name...both
California...first name

kinda sucks to be them the family named them all country's.

I shit you not

 

[LimitedPunctuation]

There's a seriously stupid couple in New Zealand that was in the news a while back, who wanted to name their child "4real". Seriously? But then the government stepped in and forbade them to use a number in their child's name, so now he goes by..... Superman. Boy, that kid is going to have issues.

On the other end of the spectrum, there's a US Army Sergeant called Max, last name Fightmaster.

i also knew a michael hunt. used to work in the same pub as me.. ill never forget the day the barmaid yelled has any one seen mike hunt?

That darn Simpson kid with his prank calls.

Staff Seargent Max Fightmaster, reporting for duty.

 

[Cheery Lunatic]

Uh, guys... I hate to tell you this, but I'm fairly certain none of those "La-a" exist.
Snopes:http://www.snopes.com/racial/language/le-a.asp

OT: I'm not really sure what I would name a kid...Probably depends a fair bit on the other responsible party's opinion on the matter.

I do think every child should at least have an interesting middle name.
Be it their Great-Grandparent's name, or a character from a cartoon (I will hug the first person to name their child Lion-O), they deserve something with a story attached.

Whut.
That means I've been lied to. D:

My friend actually told me there was a chick at our school named La-a.

 

[Zedar0]

This. It's nice that he was able to put it to use, but still...


I personally don't know any oddly-named folks, though, other than the intentionally misspelled name crowd.

 

[DigitalSushi]

I have friends called Angel and his little sister is called Stargirl, I'm Sush Alexandra... our parents were hippies.

 

[Wolfy1328]

I know one girl named denisa, but that comes off sorta okay to me.

 

[Bravo Company]

I know a lady that named her daughter Stormi, and her son Cloud. Why anyone would do that is still to be answered.

 

[WanderingBiscuits]

I know a girl named Josinnta McCormac. Shit name imo.

 

[Nexoram]

Well my friend told me that a person he knew was called... it.?! WUT! IT? seriously that's just depressing, all these names you guys are giving out makes me feel not that bad. Stanley. (it's my name) Stanley isn't that bad of a name after all.