The Escapist Avatar Adventure: An Open RP (Now Re-Opened!)
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"Speaking of sexual tension," said Tifa, "Anyone wanna have a go? There hasn't been much interesting stuff going on lately."
"And do not question me, either!" shouted Tifa as she spin-kicked Darth Xandus in the back of the head.
"Well, I'm back!" Death declared, returning from London where he'd been for the past two days since nothing at all had happened in the RP since Livingness tried to take over Hell. That was fun, wasn't it? I miss adventures like that...
"Oh, I know what'll liven up the RP!" Sam G cried, jumping through a previously-active hole in the Fourth Wall. "I'll kidnap some of the major characters who haven't posted in a while!" And with that, he grabbed Ram, Rag, Maddawg, Grimm and Samii and stuffing them into a sack like a kidnapper in a children's film. "Okay, I'm off to Jupiter with these plot-prominent characters! And I swear to God, if anyone wraps up this story arc in one post by saying "I SHOTE SMA G IN TEH HED AND HE DYES" I will castrate them with a pair of rusty pliers! Bye then!" He span around in a circle and warped away. "Dammit, can't believe I missed a Philips CD-I storyline..."
"Oh, I know what'll liven up the RP!" Sam G cried, jumping through a previously-active hole in the Fourth Wall. "I'll kidnap some of the major characters who haven't posted in a while!" And with that, he grabbed Ram, Rag, Maddawg, Grimm and Samii and stuffing them into a sack like a kidnapper in a children's film. "Okay, I'm off to Jupiter with these plot-prominent characters! And I swear to God, if anyone wraps up this story arc in one post by saying "I SHOTE SMA G IN TEH HED AND HE DYES" I will castrate them with a pair of rusty pliers! Bye then!" He span around in a circle and warped away. "Dammit, can't believe I missed a Philips CD-I storyline..."
"Wait, what'd'you mean "giving chase to Death"? I'm right here!" Death yelled, throwing an empty drinks canister at Slouch's Arwing. "I believe you're talking about the god who created me and controls my actions, and even my speech! What a sexy man he is! See?" Death sat on the ground and began to tell of the realm outside the understanding of our heroes and villains, in which a group of mere humans commanded their actions faultlessly. He told of the conflict in their realm, and that the deities of the ones Sam had kidnapped had vanished due to the actions of some of the newer gods. He finished it off with the chilling line: "We break the fourth wall a lot, but have any of us ever wondered what it's like on the other side?"
As Ramthundar (or better know to his drinking buddies as Ram) laid on the grassy knoll, lazily chewing on a piece of straw, the words of Lord Thor echoed in his head...
"Ramthundar, my servant, you have been tasked with an important quest. You must go down to the realm bellow and protect the creatures that live there. They have been beset by a Great Evil, one that plans to destroy the world it lives in. So you, dear Ramthundar, must gather a host of Heroes to combat them, and I shall give you... hey, are you drinking my ale? WHAT THE BLOODY HELL 'AVE I TOLD YOU BOUT DRINKING MAH ALE?!"
Ram's memories shut down after that, the resulting punishment of reckless ale drinking too horrible to reminisce. But he was down on the mortal plane, and that's what counted.
He gave his white, furry body a dubious look. While it's all good and grand that the good people of the mountain had found a willing sacrificial body for him to enter in, he'd wished they pick something that didn't Baa or eat so damn much.
"Well, I suppose I'm normal enough for this world" he murmured, before settling back for another nap. What was the harm, after all? After his spirit was planted and he traveled many miles for either foe, hero, or strong liquor and sadly finding none, he thought a wee quick nap in the knoll wouldn't be too much harm.
After all, what's the worst that could happen?
"Ramthundar, my servant, you have been tasked with an important quest. You must go down to the realm bellow and protect the creatures that live there. They have been beset by a Great Evil, one that plans to destroy the world it lives in. So you, dear Ramthundar, must gather a host of Heroes to combat them, and I shall give you... hey, are you drinking my ale? WHAT THE BLOODY HELL 'AVE I TOLD YOU BOUT DRINKING MAH ALE?!"
Ram's memories shut down after that, the resulting punishment of reckless ale drinking too horrible to reminisce. But he was down on the mortal plane, and that's what counted.
He gave his white, furry body a dubious look. While it's all good and grand that the good people of the mountain had found a willing sacrificial body for him to enter in, he'd wished they pick something that didn't Baa or eat so damn much.
"Well, I suppose I'm normal enough for this world" he murmured, before settling back for another nap. What was the harm, after all? After his spirit was planted and he traveled many miles for either foe, hero, or strong liquor and sadly finding none, he thought a wee quick nap in the knoll wouldn't be too much harm.
After all, what's the worst that could happen?
Okay, sorry to bother y'all with another restart but I thought this would be a good time to introduce new rules that I have just added to the OP. Please Read them Before Posting [http://www.escapistmagazine.com/forums/jump/362.101127.1567445].
For those of you who have played before, I'm sorry to inconvenience you. But this will be the last restart, and if things fall apart again, well...we'll just have to try to avoid that, eh? And I'm sure if you stick to the rules, we'll see this RP go for a while yet!
ALSO IMPORTANT! Leave the next post open for Maddawg, as I would like him to post something before anyone else does. If you could wait till tomorrow, I would really appreciate it.
Finally, for those of you new and interested in the AA...I say WELCOME! Please enjoy your time here and have a good time!
For those of you who have played before, I'm sorry to inconvenience you. But this will be the last restart, and if things fall apart again, well...we'll just have to try to avoid that, eh? And I'm sure if you stick to the rules, we'll see this RP go for a while yet!
ALSO IMPORTANT! Leave the next post open for Maddawg, as I would like him to post something before anyone else does. If you could wait till tomorrow, I would really appreciate it.
Finally, for those of you new and interested in the AA...I say WELCOME! Please enjoy your time here and have a good time!
In a deep cavern in the bowls of the Grand Canyon, Maddawg followed the British guide (Who for some reason was in Short Shorts and wearing a tank top)carrying a large bad with him andwith his lead scientist, Gordon Freeman, following him. Behind Gordon was his translator Alyx Vance.
"Here it is." said the British guide as she stopped them on a cliff hanging below a deep pit.
At the end of the pit was a tablet with finge-painting like markings on it. "My ancient Mohawken hyroglyphichs is a tad rusty, but I'll give the translation a go. Let see...uhhh, a river, a bird and a Beetle, Paul McCartney, a Boat and a Grasshopper. Okay I got it.
Paul McCartney gave a boat ride to a Beetle and a Bird.....and there was a Grasshopper."
Gordon facepalmed and made sign language signs to Alyx who said "You are the worst treasure hunter ever Miss Croft." Alyx then wispered into Maddawg's ear the actual Translation.
"uh huh....uh huh...I see...."Afterwards Maddawg looks at Lara and says "Look....there is no easy way to say it, so I'm gonna have Trump say it.
Suddenly Donald Trump appears, looks at Lara, flips his hair and says "You're fired!" and then walked away.
"YOU CAN'T FIRE ME! I AM THE WORLDS GREATEST FEMALE ARCHAEOLOGIST! FIRING ME WOULD BE MADNESS!"
Yelled Lara.
"MADNESS! THIS IS....."Maddawg stopped for a few seconds and took out his map and looked it over before nodding his head and throwing it away. "THIS IS ARIZONA!" as he yelled the state he kicked Croft in the chest, sending her off the cliff and down the bottomless pit.
"Now what?" said Alyx as Maddawg began taking ritual tablets and beads out of his bag.
"Now, we perform that ritual to summon the army of the undead...."
"Here it is." said the British guide as she stopped them on a cliff hanging below a deep pit.
At the end of the pit was a tablet with finge-painting like markings on it. "My ancient Mohawken hyroglyphichs is a tad rusty, but I'll give the translation a go. Let see...uhhh, a river, a bird and a Beetle, Paul McCartney, a Boat and a Grasshopper. Okay I got it.
Paul McCartney gave a boat ride to a Beetle and a Bird.....and there was a Grasshopper."
Gordon facepalmed and made sign language signs to Alyx who said "You are the worst treasure hunter ever Miss Croft." Alyx then wispered into Maddawg's ear the actual Translation.
"uh huh....uh huh...I see...."Afterwards Maddawg looks at Lara and says "Look....there is no easy way to say it, so I'm gonna have Trump say it.
Suddenly Donald Trump appears, looks at Lara, flips his hair and says "You're fired!" and then walked away.
"YOU CAN'T FIRE ME! I AM THE WORLDS GREATEST FEMALE ARCHAEOLOGIST! FIRING ME WOULD BE MADNESS!"
Yelled Lara.
"MADNESS! THIS IS....."Maddawg stopped for a few seconds and took out his map and looked it over before nodding his head and throwing it away. "THIS IS ARIZONA!" as he yelled the state he kicked Croft in the chest, sending her off the cliff and down the bottomless pit.
"Now what?" said Alyx as Maddawg began taking ritual tablets and beads out of his bag.
"Now, we perform that ritual to summon the army of the undead...."
It's a pretty simple question. You now choose whos side you wish to join. If you wanna be on the Epicly awesome evil side then just make a post talking about the ritual and introduce your character. If you wanna join the less awesome good side...then just post your character meeting Ram in the fields and make up some wild story as you go along! Have fun!