"Link, you *****!" Samantha yelled, kicking down the doors of Ram's establishment, walking over to Link and slamming his head against the bar. "Why the hell'd you just warp away and leave us? I! Was! So! Worried!" Sam continued, punctuating every word by slamming Link's head against the bar again. When she was done, Sam picked up her old friend and kissed him lightly on the forehead. Then she erotically licked all the blood she had just spread over Link's face off.
"Umm... Why are you doing that?" Frank asked.
"To demonstrate to you new kids how things work around here! This isn't a serious RP! We do silly things for the sake of being silly, silly!" Sam turned around to order an appletini and noticed Ram behind the bar. "Oh, hello! I wondered where you'd gotten to! I WAS SO GODDAMN WORRIED!" Sam jumped over the bar and headbutted Ram in the face, cracking his skull slightly. She turned around and noticed Rag. "Ah. You're a monkey again, I see. Good for you." With the introductions complete, Sam stepped outside for a minute to make a call.
Xandus's phone started ringing. "Hello?"
"Don't be goddamn stupid!" Sam cried down the line. "You and Maddawg have known each other for ages! Don't start acting like Anthony the Amnesiac Aardvark just because the AA suddenly got to a point which looks like it may be a major turning point in the history of the RP!"
"...How did you get this number?" was all Xandus could think to say. Sam hung up.