I have a question no one in this debate seem to be asking.
How do we show that saving Peach is worth the time?
Most Mario games have two general elements. Peach gets kidnapped, and if you want the world to stop being a hellhole, you must save her.
Most people tune out after the first three words. Mario has a storyline the way I have claws. Yes, there are some things at the end of my fingers, and they could be considered sharp but...
Few care about Mario's story. Few care about Bowser or Peach's story. It is theoretically there, but not in a way that matters. When I as a kid, no one ever said "I saved Peach!" or "I killed Bowser" or "Mario saved the day." They said things like I beat Mario 3 today. No one ever talked about the story.
But, it seems now people are, and that is fantastic. Not because I care even a little if any women feels empowered or dis-empowered by Peach. Very few games speak to my power fantasies, most run counter to them (I don't like killing people. Even virtual people. Killing your enemies is for infantile leaders. Awesome folks exploit their enemies, the way the First Grand Negus intended.) So why do I think it is fantastic that people are talking about how lame Peach is?
Because Mario is lame. Link is lame. Every silent protagonist and weak impotent figure head is lame. The heroes tend to be lame. The supporting cast tends to be lame. The enemy red shirts are lame. The big bad guy is lame. Even the exception, the video game stories that are held up and lauded tend to be at the level of cliched pulp fiction. Never once has a video game's story come close to Kate Daniels bringing an entire army of demons to their knees with a literal word.
Not because games can not display Michael Bay style special effects, but because Kate as an individual is all that awesome. Thus when she does something awesome, it is awesome squared.
So anyway (Buy Magic Bites!) now we have a camp of people who are rabble rousing about how lame female characters are. Do they have a political agenda that really doesn't have much to do with games? Oh yeah, but I don't care. At least someone is doing it in numbers.
The problem is because they have a political agenda that doesn't have much to do with games, the right question never gets asked, much less answered. When people bring up the lame characterization in games, people turn it into contests to see who is the most oppressed party, which also has very little to do with games.
So how about instead of playing the "Life in a first world country is hell, just look at meeeee!" game, lets play the lets make games better game.
I will start with Peach.
There is zero drama to Peach being kidnapped, or Mario saving her, but we might be able to fix that by showing why she is worth saving. After all, stories of sacrifice or endurance are always better when you understand why someone is sacrificing themselves for their leader, or enduring captivity without surrendering for the sake of their people.
How can a Mario game do this?
Well, lets take that Wii U controller I think is useless and crappy. Lets kill Mario's older brother, and replace player two with Peach. Peach, unlike that green looser, doesn't wait for Mario to fall in a pit to get off her tail. She is the Freaking Mushroom Princes. Her land, and much worse her people, are in danger. Beyond that, the only person who is doing anything about it is a lame pluber who is half her height, barely the height of a turtle. He is fat and dumb, but luckily he can employ the Mushroom Kingdom's Magical Arsenal to great purpose.
So, in the New Mario, level 1-1 is rather short, and there are no power ups. Mario runs and jumps through the tutorial course on the core controller. Peach uses her super awesome Magical Mushroom powers to astrally project herself from within her prison, and enjoys a little stealth video game mechanic to solve problems and rescue the toad guys in the background.
At the end of 1-1, Mario runs off screen, and the Toads ask their ethereal ruler what they can do in order to aid the cause. Peach puts them to work making magical mushrooms, stars, flowers, leaves, ect.
World 1-2 gets a bit harder, but luckily Mario will have some power ups to work with, assuming Peach's player didn't fail. Things get harder for Peach to. Not only does she have to save folks, she has to place the power ups Mario will find, and mark their location in a way only he will notice.
The better Peach does, the more overpowered Mario is. In this way I see it as a great game for a generation gap. The less experienced gamer can play Mario, and the more can play Peach. That way even if Mario's player doesn't like platforms, player two can help them out in a way other then screaming "No the B button. Hit the B button. No the B button! Noooo! Not that B button!"
Now, Mario and Bowser or Peers. Peach is neither of their peers, she is a step above. They are pawns. So if Peach is moving the Mushroom Kingdom's peaces, who is moving Bowsers?
I don't know, but while Mario is trying to get Bowser to stupid himself to death in the last fight, maybe Peach can take them on in a desperate psychic battle.
You can even run with that in all kinds of interesting ways. You see, Peach must be powerful in some way, but she is also a doof. She smiles and looks pretty and assures everyone she is happy and everything is wonderful. She does little else when not being kidnapped. Why? Well, she is a doof is one answer, answer two is that she is constantly fighting that desperate psychic battle behind her eyes, and doesn't have much attention to spare beyond telling folks everything is okay.
You know, the way leaders sometimes have to when wars are going on, and they are losing.
Bam, not only is Peach not only no longer 'sexist' but we have the possibility of wringing new fun , gameplay, and quality time with friends and family members that might not have looked at our hobby of choice too seriously. Maybe you can even have sliding difficulty bars for both aspects of the game, in case the more experienced player wishes to play Mario, or the less experienced player wishes to play Peach.
Is there any way in which the "gamer" does not win in such a scenario?
One does not need to ask "How can I stop the evil misogynistic masses that make up the game developer community and it's fan base from continually oppressing me?" to see a huge flaw in how one dimensional many of our longest standing characters really are. One does not need to bring the baggage of their entire life, throw it on the table, and demand it be honored and accommodated in order to need this flaw to die off if they are going to continue this super awesome hobby for another twenty years.
They can just want the "Why am I killing these two thousand people again?" question to have an answer better then "Because it is a video game." You don't even need dialogue or voice acting to answer the question better then that.
So instead of letting each side troll the other until one gets tired (which will never, ever happen. This is the internet.) why not we try to look at neat ways we can make games better for ourselves. After all, we are all gamers. By making games better for ourselves, we make them better for the person on the couch next to us, or across the Ethernet cord.
My idea may or may not suck. I personally have a logistics fetish. I like managing the supply lines of armies, not seeing them fight, thus I approached the task of improving Peach by turning her into my version of a hero. Perhaps you can do better?
This post was inspired by: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HJihi5rB_Ek
While I profoundly disagree with most of her points on characterization, she certainly knows how to get people to listen to her arguments and the awesome video contained a plea to try to change the narrative from a negative to a positive.
So here we are. Credit where credit is due... but if you got a problem with this post, please don't take it to the blogger. We don't think alike, just share some values. Remember, she thinks Peach is neat. I think she is a doof.
In closing: Shouldn't you be searching Ilona Andrews on amazon? Magic Bites isn't going to read it's self.