The Most Horrific Pain of Your Life

[InnerRebellion]

Went paint balling. Some dumbass kid comes off the field waving his gun around, safety off, his barrel bag off. I yell for the idiot to put it on and he stares at me, confused. I yell again and the fucking idiot hits the trigger and I take about 4 paintballs, all moving at 225psi, to the jaw. OW.

 

[Bomberman4000]

When I was in 8th grade I was at wrestling practice. I was sparring and was dropped on my head on a floor that had no padding. I immediately blacked out and when I came to, I was in an ambulance with no feeling below my waist and what felt like I thousand needles jammed into my neck. To this day I have nerve damage in my neck and my left leg is to this day weaker than my right one (and the injury happened almost 10 years ago)

I eventually got feeling back in my legs and after a couple of months I was able to resume school and such. Lot of stuff for an 8th grader to deal with.

 

[Master Taffer]

Kidney stone.

 

[MetaMuffin]

Jacking off 10 times in one day.

 

[Nanaki316]

Well I have given birth twice, that's right up there on the pain scale. My second was much easier but my first daughter had an exceedingly large head : \

Only other time would have been being attacked with a knife by my ex boyfriend. If a police woman hadn't pulled me out of the way he would have had my arm right off but thankfully he just swiped at me. The skin split hideously and I never had it stitched. Now it's a big ass ugly scar.

 

[FamoFunk]

Giving birth.


I win.
/thread

Hate to be that guy (which there have been a few in response to this but), but I don't think you win this thread or even ended it. a)not a game b)wasn't looking for the one most painful experience (it's not Highlander)

Also, how's your vagina/taint feeling these day? Pretty normal huh? I injured my ankle over six months ago and I could barely walk yesterday due to pain. I nearly got my foot amputated from royally fucking up my leg/ankle. The pain was beyond excruciating and that awful super sharp pain lasted nearly two months. The last four-five have consisted of a duller pain sprinkled in with moments/days of sharp pain. I personally would have taken the option of birthing triplets any day.

I'm not serious about the I win thing I just threw it in there as most of this site is Male and it's not something they could experience themselves and say "it doesn't hurt"

I would give birth all over again if I had to, even with the pain the comes with it.
Not to mention I'd rather do it over half the stories I've read on this thread! *eyes water*

 

[Turbo_Destructor]

three quarters of my fingernail got ripped off by a very large wheely bin falling on it. However the bit that got ripped of was still attached to the rest of the nail by a pretty thick bit of nail.

I went to the hospital, where the doctor was supposed to give me a digital block - which involves injected a local anaesthetic directly into the nerves in your finger, but he missed the nerve. So he then proceeded to twist and pull and wrench at the loose fingernail till it tore of from the bit still attached to my finger, stopping every now and then to pour alcohol on the raw flesh where the nail had been ripped off, while I was completely unanaesthetised.

It was fucking agony.

 

[MrGalactus]

Broke my arm once, my left hand got twisted so the palm was facing me, and the whole arm itself was in a sharp S shape. Ok, look at your left hand from the back of it, then imagine it twisted at the wrist so your palm is now facing you, with one bone sticking out the right side of your arm, now imagine 2 big fractures further down the arm that get stuck on the skin so it's like a Z shape. Now add blood everywhere.
I cannot describe the agony.
Luckily I passed out after a very, very long 30 seconds.

*Sigh*

Fell out of a tree.

EDIT: I wanted to give props to my buddy Duffy. He called the ambulance for me. That dude saved my life that day, I would've bled out without him. Keep your friends close, escapists.

 

[Reynard Wrecce]

Donated sperm to friends and had a precautionary STI screen beforehand. The cotton-bud (Q-tip)down the end of the old chap - in, turn, scrape, withdraw - was...um, yeah...painful. Really quite painful.
And THEN they ask you for the urine sample! "You want me to pee through this thing? You just Roto-Rootered it! AAAGGHH IT BURNS!!!"

LOL I had that done to me once too.

This Girl I dated called me screaming that I gave her chlamydia and what a big asshole I was etc etc. So it took a few days (during which she kept telling me what a huge asshole i was). Anyways they do to me what u brought up, the whole Q-tip up the urethra thing which was painful and uncomfortable.

Anyways the results came back and I was STD free. So it turned out she picked up the clap somewhere else. LOLOLOLOL. Man did i chew that ***** out. It felt so good, better than sex with her was. She looked like the biggest fool in the world. It was almost worth getting the Q-tip....Almost.

Q-tip up the urethra is painful but not as bad as many think it would automatically be though. Although I heard it can be excrutiating and dangerous if u move or flex haha. Plus peeing afterwards like you said is awful. And it hurts everytime you piss for days after the fact.

Ah, maybe that's why it hurt so much; I may have flinched and flexed a little. Certainly worse than acute appendicitis, broken bones or sensitive-area tattooing.

 

[ConnorTheRed]

For me it's a tie between sunburn on my back so bad I had to lie on my stomach for two days with almost no movement, and the time I stood on a bit of timber with a massive rusty nail sticking out of it. The nail stabbed through my foot, and when I reflexively lifted my foot, the whole board came up with it. I had to pull the timber out of my foot. It hurt a buttload.

 

[BringBackBuck]

I set myself on fire.

Multiple thickness burns (1st to 3rd degree) to 10% of my body. Couple of days in ICU, 2 skin grafts, a few weeks in hospital.

Yeah that hurt some...

 

[ChipSandwich]

Getting hit in the balls twice in 10 seconds? Wasn't really as bad as I thought it would be, but it does hang around for quite a while. Getting them twisted is a whole 'nother story, but I don't have experience in that sort of thing, so yeah.

Accidentally grabbing a hot metal rod. As in, it was red hot about 30 seconds before and recently went back to grey. Fuck that.

 

[bioVOLTAGE]

Acute Appendicitis. The recovery wasn't too bad, just spent a week feeling kinda crappy but the 8 hours in the emergency room was no fun at all.

The same thing for me, except that I waited a week to do anything about it, then a night in the hospital, then having the doctor have no idea what was wrong with me to cut me open to find out. It took him 2.5 hours to realize my my appendix was about to rupture. I was in the hospital for another week while they drained this neon purple fluid. But that was not the worst part. That would be when they removed the thing that was draining the fluid. They had snapped it together during the surgery from both sides. They gave me nothing to numb the area before. The doctor told me that I wouldn't feel a thing. Then the nurse leaned in and said that it would hurt like hell. She was right. I'm pretty sure they heard me two floors away when I screamed. I still have a scar from where it was.

The moral of the story is DON'T WAIT A WEEK.

 

[Hayden Muney]

cracked open my shin on a wall so well that i could see my bone but i did have chocolate milk

 

[tristow]

when i fell on my tail bone the seconed time

 

[magma]

Giving birth.


I win.
/thread

No.

Having large kidney stones, while hearing how giving birth is all sunshine and rainbows compared to a regular kidney stone from nearly every female in the hospital, is much worse.

I'd end the thread but I have learned things can always be worse.

 

[MyBubblesAreOnFire]

When i was 8 i tripped and skinned my hole finger, i was in so much pain for a long time

 

[Frungy]

Giving birth.


I win.
/thread

Kidney stone. 9mm. Right now. 4 months and counting. I win.

Oh, plus a urologist who doesn't understand the need for painkillers when he's probing the most sensitive portion of your anatomy. That was 2 days ago, 45 minutes of him trying to insert a size 10 probe into a size 7 tube. I'm still bleeding.

And yes, I an finding a new urologist, one who doesn't use the words, "Hang in there for just another few minutes.".

Child birth? Don't make me laugh.

 

[rutger5000]

My balls being bitten of by a dog. It happened in a dream, but it still hurt like hell. By the way from were comes the conception that you can't feel anything in your dreams? Dunno about you guys, but I feel almost everything.
Real pain would be ear-infection. But it was constant, so I got used to it. it wasn't treaded for 4 months or so, by the time we went to see the doctor he was actually shocked that I walked around with it that long. I became sick as a dog because of the antibiotics gave me. For a guy who only gets sick every 5 years or so that's very annoying.

 

[Mechsoap]

getting my prince albert piercing then later that day having my foot run over by my friend
i just couldnt stop bleeding from my *cough*

what was your reason, to get a prince Albert? I don't understand, why people would do that!

OP: it was a long time ago when I was small, when i cut of my right index finger, the doctors were so good that I have no scarring or any indication it ever happened.