The tetris movies is becoming a trilogy

[Godzillarich(aka tf2godz)]

https://m.reddit.com/r/nottheonion/comments/4qdjdf/tetris_gets_trilogy_as_story_too_big_to_fit_into/
So apparently they're going to make the tetris movie into a trilogy because they came up with too much story for 1 film

I'm trying to think of some kind of joke, some kind of reaction, like next thing they'll do is make _____ into a movie, but I can't think of anything dumber than this. I think filmmaking has hit rock bottom.

 

[Chimpzy_v1legacy]

Ok, so apparently that's a thing that's happening...

I have to admit, now I'm really curious wtf they're up to that turns a game about making lines out of falling tetrominoes into enough material to fill 3 movies.

 

[Saelune]

Why not a Tetrilogy?...What? Someone was gonna do it.

Though maybe this is one small part of a huge practical joke...

Or it will go the way of Advent Rising. That was a trilogy too. Remember those two other games that didn't come out?

I just have to assume and hope the first will flop, and stow their plans and they will be like "Why did we even bother?"

 

[Neverhoodian]

How? Just...HOW???

And I thought the Hobbit trilogy was padded to hell...I have no idea how in the world they expect to create a decent story out of Tetris with one film, let alone three.

This is the only Tetris movie you'll ever need:

 

[Recusant]

I'm starting to think I should take bets on the grand revelation that reality itself is just a massive practical joke.

But hey, think of it this way: how badly can they mess it up? How do you screw up a game with no setting, characters, or plot? What's the worst they can do- have a B mode wherein it takes 26 lines to win? Start super heart mode and have it go slower?

 

[Leg End]

Does this mean Cardcaptor Sakura Tetris is going to be featured as a plot point? Or at least Sakura Mode in Grand Master?

You've got potential guys. Use it!

 

[Hawki]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Alw5hs0chj0

There's your first installment.

 

[Bobular]

If Battleship is anything to go by the tetris blocks will be alien space craft and yeah I got nothing else. Even using Battleship I can't think how a tetris movie is possible, let alone three.

 

[anthony87]

Can't they just line up a few parts so that they disappear and there's more room?

................................

Fuck off.

Tetris jokes are hard.

 

[Glongpre]

If Battleship is anything to go by the tetris blocks will be alien space craft and yeah I got nothing else. Even using Battleship I can't think how a tetris movie is possible, let alone three.

At least with Battleship they have a setting, which is enough to make up everything else. Tetris has nothing. It wouldn't surprise me if the movie has nothing to do with Tetris whatsoever.

It will be about a boy's coming of age story, and how after highschool (which is just a mess of niches and trying to fit in (like trying to fit the pieces in correctly!!!)) he figures out what kind of person he is, and all the pieces fall into place. The climactic revelation will happen as he plays Tetris on an arcade board. Lmao.

Hollywood give me money for my great Tetris script!

 

[Something Amyss]

Screw that, I want the Tetris Cinematic Universe.

Don't you want to see the origins of the T-block? Don't you want to see them come together to form lines after disharmony led to them filling up half the screen?

No?

Me either! >.>

 

[008Zulu_v1legacy]

Tetris jokes are hard.

At least when the first movie bombs, the rest will fall in to place.

Crap, you jinxed me.

 

[anthony87]

Screw that, I want the Tetris Cinematic Universe.

Don't you want to see the origins of the T-block? Don't you want to see them come together to form lines after disharmony led to them filling up half the screen?

No?

Me either! >.>

Hell they already made that


Kinda......sorta.

Like I said, Tetris jokes are hard. T_T

 

[Neurotic Void Melody]

I thought we already knew this...being the hive mind that I hoped we would be. But honestly, I think the lack of any foundation whatsoever may be a good thing, it affords infinite creative freedom, and there is no way it could be worse than pixels, right? ...?? Sandler has a contract out from Netflix to multipley murder any good will his mother may have had left for him while proving the taste of the easily pleased populace is in a worrying, but financially beneficial state. I can garuntee you that it will not be just three films of watching blocks inserted into other blocks then disappearing to...where? Now there's your first mystery! Start unravelling this right-angled tapestry and you may find another world in which to explore. Orrrr...it could just be three films of Tetris tournaments, which is about as boring as a take could get.
What would Jesus Suda 51 do with a Tetris adaption? Apart from applying cock humour to everything, but we must take the highs and lows of crazy I guess, not like we have a choice.

?The story we conceived is so big,? said Kasanoff. ?This isn?t us splitting the last one of our eight movies in two to wring blood out of the stone. It?s just a big story.? Heh! Shots fired, albeit more of a messy drive-by firing of shots, taking civilians down in the process.

 

[Johnny Novgorod]

Maybe it's an Adaptation. (2002) style of adaptation, about how you can't possible make a movie about Tetris.

 

[Parasondox]

Hollywood never learns. All they seen is green and they are high on that stuff.

 

[DefunctTheory]

Spoiler

Seriously, what? This can't be right. How in the hell do you make movies out of Tetris.

I'm going to go watch Wreck-It Ralph now. Maybe it has the answers.

 

[Dalisclock]

How? Just...HOW???

And I thought the Hobbit trilogy was padded to hell...I have no idea how in the world they expect to create a decent story out of Tetris with one film, let alone three.

This is the only Tetris movie you'll ever need:

Thank you, good sir.

You have just won the internet.

 

[go-10]

so humanity lives in space and colonies are built in shapes based on necessity and space available, these shapes are that of the Tetris game pieces and the colony itself is known as The Tetris. These people are the last remnants of humanity and are looking for a new habitable planet but in their search the colony has continued to grow and add pieces so that The Tetris is now quite large.
After years of searching they arrive at a planet that's habitable, but because of the large size of The Tetris they come up with a plan to break up the colony back into individual pieces and send those pieces down one at a time. Of course the planet inhabitants aren't happy with this and a war ensues, from that point on it becomes essentially Avatar or Pocahontas until the twist end when it's revealed that it was EARTH ALL ALONG!

 

[Dreiko_v1legacy]

I doubt this is the kind of block-buster they are going for.

Can't they just line up a few parts so that they disappear and there's more room?

................................

Fuck off.

Tetris jokes are hard.

Nope, easymode.