Things that make no sense to you in video games

[Xelt]

Pokemon.

What the fuck? I can just waltz in anyone's house and no one would care?

Also there are more PokeCenters then there are hospitals? What, our animal thingy slaves deserve more healthcare than us now?

I think what's stranger is the fact that there never seem to be enough houses for everyone you see in a town. For example, there are only three buildings in Pallet Town in the original game: Your house, your rival's house, and Oak's lab; but there are 2-3 other people in Pallet Town who constantly stand outside. Where do they live?

Since we're talking about Pokemon, How the hell does the professor from each game know when you're about to use an item when you shouldn't? When you try to ride the bike indoors in the first game, Professor Oak would say something like, "This isn't the time to use that," no matter how far from Pallet Town you were at the time. How the hell does he know? The only plausible explanation is that he is an incredibly powerful telepath who can read people's minds from miles away.

And why are the Elite 4 champions constantly there? Do they have lives or do they just sit inside, imprisoning passer-bys to unescapable battles?
And what about the trainers? Do they just stand there awaiting somebody to wander by so they can get uncomfortably close to them and then have their animals molest yours?

Also, why don't you become the Elite 4 Champion after beating him? I "blacked out" ten times getting this far, burned through 60 Hyper Potions and a shit-ton of Revives, and all I get is my Pokemon in the hall of fame? Bullshit! I wanna put some noob trainers in their place!

They can also convert Pokemon and items into data and store them on a computer, have a magnet train as well as a hydrojet boat, and several gyms have teleporter panels, yet everybody drops out of school at the age of ten to go train Pokemon. Futhermore, there are numerous instances of children younger than ten training, but I remember something along the lines of "You gotta be ten to get your trainer's license" or whatever. Also, how do you support a nation whose primary form of currency exchange is battling and buying potions and Pokeballs? Assuming no other characters use the shop (They do just stand in one place after all), the player character is supporting the ENTIRE economy of the region the game is set in.

An explanation for all this, is that when you play the games you see it from the eyes of that character. Usualy said character is 10, so s/he just sees pokémon based thigns. In reality theres far more in each town, but only the Pokémon stuff gets the attention of this pokémon-fanatic.

 

[GraveeKing]

I could go on about team fortresses 2 lack of logic for ages but that's so fun i don't care.

So anyway:
Even on the easiest settings of a game, shooting people doesn't knock them back, kill them instantly or more importantly - make them scream out in agonizing pain - if you shoot someone in the arm with even the smallest pistol - it's gonna bloody well hurt and make them drop their gun/weapon! They just been shot in the arm! maybe shattered the bone! Bleeding terribly!

I believe this is the part where someone quotes the youtube video of Monty pythons black knight claiming it's only a flesh wound and since I don't understand youtube videos linked fully here yet someone else can do so for me.

 

[AWC Viper]

take 10000000 rounds to the face, run for hours, carry 154123942 guns, but not able to open a door...

 

[scrambledeggs]

No one goes to the bathroom. Ever.

Excluding The Dude from Postal, and Duke Nukem.

Heavy Rain and the Sims both entail a lot of peeing.

 

[Count Igor]

I could go on about team fortresses 2 lack of logic for ages but that's so fun i don't care.

So anyway:
Even on the easiest settings of a game, shooting people doesn't knock them back, kill them instantly or more importantly - make them scream out in agonizing pain - if you shoot someone in the arm with even the smallest pistol - it's gonna bloody well hurt and make them drop their gun/weapon! They just been shot in the arm! maybe shattered the bone! Bleeding terribly!

I believe this is the part where someone quotes the youtube video of Monty pythons black knight claiming it's only a flesh wound and since I don't understand youtube videos linked fully here yet someone else can do so for me.

It's [ youtube=zKhEw7nD9C4 ]
Those are the numbers after the = in the youtube URL on the video.
Like so:

 

[Seagoon]

you can not tell me that in real life warfare the team would all split up regardless of title and show off their moves with 360 sniping, tactical camping, nuke boosting... makes me sick...

 

[Sacman]

double jumping. Think about it.

Dammit! Ninja'd by the first post!

Ok, something else; the fact that every time I reload in a game (even when I only fire one bullet) I'm throwing away a partially full magazine (clip?) bothers me somewhat.

Also, how does Kratos carry all that crap in God of War 3?

If I remember correctly in the original Mafia you lose the ammo in your clip if you reload it... it was pretty annoying...<.<

 

[katsabas]

Ok, where does one start with this:

Ivy's armor protects nothing. Why the hell is she wearing that thing? Aside from the obvious.

Every car in the Burnout franchise has a boost system based on driving other people off the road. Wait, what?

Leon S. Kennedy has a suitcase full of guns and sprays that appears only when you hit start. Until then, where does he keep it?

In Fallout 3, you can heal your fractured head by sleeping.

A MW2 Sentry Gun needs a shitload of bullets to go down but only a knife slice to be deactivated.

Kratos' Chains Of Anything. How does he do what he does since the chains are not made out of rubber?

Street Fighter: Since when does Chi materialize into flaming dragon punches?

 

[gyroscopeboy]

being mute

I hate this the most. Like when you meet a character who's an absolute dickhead, and your character should really scream "Fuck You, you retard, you're going to get us all killed!" and yet i sit there mute and wait for my inevitable ass-raping.

 

[Spandexpanda]

Escort missions: We have here fifteen incredibly high value objects, which we will put in this hilariously weakly-armoured (and slow, don't forget slow) ship, with no guns, and then send you two rookie fighter pilots in our weakest, oldest ships, with very little ammo to defend it. Now remember, the enemy will be sending in at least fifteen waves of super ships piloted by aces, as well as two destroyers.

I'm looking at you freespace.... Also, the dressing down you got if you failed was unbelievable.

 

[Android2137]

double jumping. Think about it.

Not just that, but being able to change direction and momentum in mid-jump. If you were a track star, maybe you could manage it a little, but not to the effectiveness you see in gaming.

 

[kijebe]

Flashlights in nearly every game. Are the batteries really that terrible that they drain in 30 seconds, and can magically recharge afterwards by simply collecting the bullshit from the air? Or is everyone just using those godawful "shake-to-recharge" flashlights or something?

well... thay got the metro 2033 flashlight pretty well

 

[kijebe]

Being able to somehow pause time when accessing inventory
being able to reload the entire 8 shot magazine on a shotgun in 2 seconds by lowering it off screen
being able to fire one round, drop an entire mag out of the gun, reload a new one, and somehow only lose one shot of ammo
being able to take not only the gun but all the ammo the enemy had in his possession simply by picking up the gun
being able to heal wounds with the application of food, water, or even minute amounts of time
being able to aim and fire my gun despite having a broken leg, two broken arms, and a stunned head
somehow not needing to sleep
being mute
being able to extract rocket launcher ammunition from a baseball bat
being able to strip down and change clothes on the spot without passers-by commenting or recoiling in horror
Having a shopkeeper charge me ridiculous prices despite the fact that I'm the only thing standing between him and complete oblivion
being able to carry a small army's worth of guns, ammunition, armor, food, etc. in what essentially is my pocket without being crushed
being able to instantly scope a rifle as long as I am tall freehand
being able to wield a sword as wide as my waist and as long as I am tall
Being able to absorb objects within a foot of my feet through them and seemingly storing my guns in my lower abdominal region
being ordered to secure that burgertown all by yourself, Ramirez!
Drinking soda that somehow allows the event of my jumping to prone to cause a gigantic explosion
Seemingly bog standard humans taking several shotgun shells to the face before going down
My simply shooting someone standing a fair chance of causing them to explode into an eyeball-ridden paste
My pistol being able to score headshots at 300 yards
magical bottomless ammo piles
dual wielding shotguns without breaking my wrists
firing a .50 caliber sniper rifle freehand without falling over or breaking my collar bone

ArmA 2

 

[weker]

double jumping. Think about it.

its used for added air control as of course its hard to jump accurately when its not you.

 

[Thedutchjelle]

Invisible walls to block of regions you're not supposed to get to.

The worst are actual invisible walls, but their replacements Knee-high fence and Incredibly Dense Forest aren't much better.

STALKER is notorious at this : You run around the whole zone with assault rifles and grenades, but a barbed wire fence half a meter high is a impossible barrier.

 

[Iwana Humpalot]

When i was playing assassinns creed, i had 4 assassins, 2 girls nad 2 guys. Then comes the mission where they use disguise.. They were all men O.O

Also when i got my 1st one to assassins rank, there were a ton of assassins watching in the cut-scene, and i still had only 4 asassins. >.<

 

[SalamanderJoe]

Cracked skull and broken legs in Fallout 3? You'll be fine. Just crawl into bed somewhere and sleep it off...

EDITarn, ninja'd

 

[Adrian Madhog]

No zombie kids or Ganados kids in RE.... why? Where they ALL on a school trip when the epidemic ran wild?