This stray cat won't leave me alone

[Zildjin81]

Keep it, cats are almost as good of chick magnets as turtles are.

 

[Cheesus333]

Well duh, it's OBVIOUSLY a spy!

You should frequently yell 'I KNOW YOUR SECRET' in its face - I guarantee it will run away, cause the government don't want you to know about their cat spies. And then take it to a cat shelter or whatever cause that's the normal thing to do.

 

[Xvito]

You should tell the cat to go and get his friends, then you should train them to become ninjas.
After you've done that all you need to do is kill them and revive them again as Zombie Ninja Panda Bears... Yes, Panda Bears.

Or you could find an animal shelter of some sort.

 

[Nostalgia]

Give it food? :S

If you give it food, it will keep coming back. I don't think he wants that, from the sound of it.

 

[Andalusa]

Why are all these people suggesting cruelty towards the cat? I remember when this place used to not be like the rest of the internet. It used to be full of kind, intelligent human beings who would give genuine advice when asked. What happened to us, Escapists? When did we become /b/?

That seems a bit out of order; you're in effect comparing use to the SCUM of the internet.

Aww. This happened to me once when I was living in Belgium.
We gave it food.
Then one day it came and dumped a litter of new born kittens on us.
We kind of adopted them and built them a little nest box in the winter.
Take it in or take it to a shelter.

crush up a light bulb really fine and put it in a can of tuna and feed it to the cat, then about thirty minutes later go for along walk...it it follows you it won't survive the trip and you will be free of the stray cat

And that's just evil. It's not the cats fault it's homeless and hungry.

Awwwww, that sounds so lovely .

What, us taking in a stray cat or the crushing light bulbs bit?

 

[Evilbunny]

If cute, keep it. If ugly, let it starve.

Don't you dare say that. Just because a cat is ugly doesn't mean it doesn't deserve to be loved.

 

[nathan-dts]

Why are all these people suggesting cruelty towards the cat? I remember when this place used to not be like the rest of the internet. It used to be full of kind, intelligent human beings who would give genuine advice when asked. What happened to us, Escapists? When did we become /b/?

That seems a bit out of order; you're in effect comparing use to the SCUM of the internet.

Aww. This happened to me once when I was living in Belgium.
We gave it food.
Then one day it came and dumped a litter of new born kittens on us.
We kind of adopted them and built them a little nest box in the winter.
Take it in or take it to a shelter.

crush up a light bulb really fine and put it in a can of tuna and feed it to the cat, then about thirty minutes later go for along walk...it it follows you it won't survive the trip and you will be free of the stray cat

And that's just evil. It's not the cats fault it's homeless and hungry.

Awwwww, that sounds so lovely .

What, us taking in a stray cat or the crushing light bulbs bit?

Taking in the cat.

 

[Andalusa]

Taking in the cat.

Good, because if was the light bulbs thing then I'd have to hunt you down.

 

[arcainia]

If cute, keep it. If ugly, let it starve.

Don't you dare say that. Just because a cat is ugly doesn't mean it doesn't deserve to be loved.

Fuck, that made me cry. Why did you have to go and post that?;;;

Anyway, seeing as I'm apparently the only person who bothered to read the comments, the OP already said that he has a cat and can't take care of this one, so he's taking him to the shelter. Make sure he's treated well my friend.

 

[Russian_Assassin]

Yeah the cat believes it owns you now. If I were you I'd either offer it a place in my house or give it to a shelter, so it can be given to a loving family. Ignoring it won't do I'm afraid.

EDIT: I read the story of the Ugly kitty... :'( It almost made me cry... Poor kitty.
EDIT2: All of you suggesting he should hurt or kill the kitty can burn in the deepest pits of hell! You cold hearted bastards! I am dead serious!

 

[nolph fooz]

Get a shot-gun ?

Or just stop giving it milk

 

[Roamin11]

I've already got a cat (who doesn't like the aforementioned stray) so taking it in isn't an option.

I guess I'll be taking it up to the animal shelter tommorow.

Just have your cat show it who is boss around there! I have a dog and whenever there is a stray..... ANYTHING he goes and trys to teach it a lesson, its amussing because hes a shetland sheep dog.

 

[Lord George]

Ever considered amateur taxidermy

 

[Andalusa]

Taking in the cat.

Good, because if was the light bulbs thing then I'd have to hunt you down.

Pffffhahahaha.
And do what? Bake him some cookies?
Face it, you're about as terrifying as an adorable kitten.

I could be evil...
put crushed light bulbs into the cookies...

 

[Trisk]

Meh, I like to assume the mean comments are jokes. Maybe I'm just naive?

Anyway, yeah you have already been given the best advice, call the animal shelter seei f they'll come pick it up. It might belong to someone, you never know but I doubt it given your description of events.

 

[Mr Fatherland]

If cute, keep it. If ugly, let it starve.

Don't you dare say that. Just because a cat is ugly doesn't mean it doesn't deserve to be loved.

That was... really sad.

 

[TMAN10112]

Like Fix-The-Spade said; adopt it, give it to a shelter, or give it to a (trustworthy) friend. I never was much of a cat person, but I have a real soft-spot for animals (unless their tasty, in which case I will most likely make jerky out of them) so I would probably adopt it.