Times you have put jerks in their place
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In church, the dumb neanderthal guy (let's call him Jonas) in my class, who had a habit of scratching his crotch when people could see, kept talking with his pals. The reason we were in church was that this was a Christian school, though not a fundamentalist one. (In biology class we were taught that evolution is a fact, thank goodness.) I don't know why someone so proud of his atheism as he would go to a Christian high school. Some people...
Anyway, I told Jonas to be quiet. He tapped me on the shoulder (he was sitting behind me) and I told him to stop. He asked me what my problem was, and I told him "You're my problem, you filthy gorilla! You're boorish, stupid and worthless. You're human garbage! You're a walking reason to legalize retroactive abortion!" I kept on like that for about fifteen seconds more, and then somebody told me "That's enough, okay?"
Jonas never came back to our school again, and started going to a new one. I'm still really happy that I told him off like this. Because let me tell you, he was not an agreeable person. Male chauvinist amongst other things. If you'd have been to that school you'd have agreed that he deserved everything he got.
Anyway, I told Jonas to be quiet. He tapped me on the shoulder (he was sitting behind me) and I told him to stop. He asked me what my problem was, and I told him "You're my problem, you filthy gorilla! You're boorish, stupid and worthless. You're human garbage! You're a walking reason to legalize retroactive abortion!" I kept on like that for about fifteen seconds more, and then somebody told me "That's enough, okay?"
Jonas never came back to our school again, and started going to a new one. I'm still really happy that I told him off like this. Because let me tell you, he was not an agreeable person. Male chauvinist amongst other things. If you'd have been to that school you'd have agreed that he deserved everything he got.
3 things.
First was way back in Grade 7 (11-12 years of age), where this douchebag had recently kicked me in the wrist, and sprained it. It was in a cloth-cast. Anyway, he was starting shit with me in one class where we had a substitute teacher, and we were watching a movie. I stand up, turn to him and say "Back off, right fucking now. You already sprained my wrist for no reason, and if you keep on messing with me, I'm going to beat the shit out of you, wrist and all." Everyone in the class was watching (and were all on my side. This kid wasn't popular, because he was a violent douche), and the teacher was trying to tell me to sit down. I ignored her completely. The other kid stood up to challenge me, I guess, so I took two steps until I was face to face with him. Then I just stared him down until he went and sat at the back of the classroom. So I said "That's what I thought." and sat back down where I was before. Everyone was like "Fuck yeah, Nick."
Second time was in Grade 9 (13-14), where some little shit of a bully who constantly gave me crap in class. Anyway, one day he was late to class, and as he was walking to his table, he knocked my books off mine with his hands. I instantly got up, grabbed him by the collar, pulled him back to where my books are (in the middle of a lesson) and told him to "pick my fucking books up, now". He said "Err, why should I, I didn't do anything?" So I threw him to the ground and told him not to fuck with me. He still did, just nowhere near as bad as before. My teacher caught up with me after and said that he agreed with me, and I wouldn't get in trouble.
Third time, today (only reason why it's memorable). Two little shits (I'd say about 14) came through my register (I'm a checkout chap), so I asked them how their day was. I'm obliged to ask, otherwise I can lose my job. I HAVE to ask. Anyway, one of them said "Oh fine. I'm, you know, doing something with my life. Unlike you." I snapped internally. Instead of yelling or anything, I just smiled and said "Oh, I'm only doing this job in my gap year to earn some money. I'm going to university next year to study Psychology. I've already been accepted, I'm just taking some time off before. Speaking of, shouldn't you be at school? That'll be 5 dollars 90." Little fucker was speechless. He paid his money and left.
First was way back in Grade 7 (11-12 years of age), where this douchebag had recently kicked me in the wrist, and sprained it. It was in a cloth-cast. Anyway, he was starting shit with me in one class where we had a substitute teacher, and we were watching a movie. I stand up, turn to him and say "Back off, right fucking now. You already sprained my wrist for no reason, and if you keep on messing with me, I'm going to beat the shit out of you, wrist and all." Everyone in the class was watching (and were all on my side. This kid wasn't popular, because he was a violent douche), and the teacher was trying to tell me to sit down. I ignored her completely. The other kid stood up to challenge me, I guess, so I took two steps until I was face to face with him. Then I just stared him down until he went and sat at the back of the classroom. So I said "That's what I thought." and sat back down where I was before. Everyone was like "Fuck yeah, Nick."
Second time was in Grade 9 (13-14), where some little shit of a bully who constantly gave me crap in class. Anyway, one day he was late to class, and as he was walking to his table, he knocked my books off mine with his hands. I instantly got up, grabbed him by the collar, pulled him back to where my books are (in the middle of a lesson) and told him to "pick my fucking books up, now". He said "Err, why should I, I didn't do anything?" So I threw him to the ground and told him not to fuck with me. He still did, just nowhere near as bad as before. My teacher caught up with me after and said that he agreed with me, and I wouldn't get in trouble.
Third time, today (only reason why it's memorable). Two little shits (I'd say about 14) came through my register (I'm a checkout chap), so I asked them how their day was. I'm obliged to ask, otherwise I can lose my job. I HAVE to ask. Anyway, one of them said "Oh fine. I'm, you know, doing something with my life. Unlike you." I snapped internally. Instead of yelling or anything, I just smiled and said "Oh, I'm only doing this job in my gap year to earn some money. I'm going to university next year to study Psychology. I've already been accepted, I'm just taking some time off before. Speaking of, shouldn't you be at school? That'll be 5 dollars 90." Little fucker was speechless. He paid his money and left.
Some guy was insulting me in my Geography class, wandering around the room, all in all being a prat, and the teacher was telling him to sit down but he wouldn't listen. He said something to me so I threw my pen, it bounced off his head and spiralled all the way back down to me where I caught it. It looked like I'd planned it, and he sat down and shut up and got on with his work. I couldn't do it again if you paid me. :]
A friend of mine once threw a kid on the floor. He kept shouting at him and saying 'Give us a burn' which colloquially means 'chase me'. So my friend grabbed him and threw him head first into the ground. I wasn't there, but he was notorious for a few weeks.
A friend of mine once threw a kid on the floor. He kept shouting at him and saying 'Give us a burn' which colloquially means 'chase me'. So my friend grabbed him and threw him head first into the ground. I wasn't there, but he was notorious for a few weeks.
You my good sir, are awesome.Grahav said:
You just won the awesome-game. That is damn cool.RoutineEnvelope said:
OT: Haven't really had any awesome moments. I don't get bothered by the jerks much (I suppose being > 6ft helps)
well ive got alot of stories but my favorite one is this
OT:my girlfriend and I and a bunch of my friends were at the local skating rink,and this guy out of the blue calls my girlfriend a stupid c*** so i walked up to him kindly asked him to appologize.he punch me in the gut (thats something you dont wanna do)i grabbed him by his neck kneed him in the head 4-5 times and then hip tossed him. (i am a 4 years practioner of muay thai and 2 time state champion for wrestling)
OT:my girlfriend and I and a bunch of my friends were at the local skating rink,and this guy out of the blue calls my girlfriend a stupid c*** so i walked up to him kindly asked him to appologize.he punch me in the gut (thats something you dont wanna do)i grabbed him by his neck kneed him in the head 4-5 times and then hip tossed him. (i am a 4 years practioner of muay thai and 2 time state champion for wrestling)
147.Corum1134 said:
Times I have been a jerk and put in my place, 126.
I figure I'm ahead of the game.
Seriously, after reviewing this thread, I'm thinking a lot of folks confuse putting a jerk in their place with being obnoxious, violent, or just plain overreacting to a situation.
There was this time I cut a kid's head off with a machette for looking at me. Then the cops came and I was all like "Dude, he was LOOKING at me!" and they were all "the fucking ****!" and kicked his corpse around for a bit. Then we went for ice cream.Marmooset said:
I could have...Marmooset said:
... but I didn't.
Besides, if I don't use my monthly allotment of Ts I'll get less next time there's a departmental review.
I hit a kid with a binder after he claimed he could put me through a wall. I'm generally liked by the younger student body (the older students don't know me) and cross country team (he was on it) because of it.
I fed a kid his parents in a chili once.
OT: I don't usually put jerks in their place, but sometimes I rise to the occasion and kick ass.
OT: I don't usually put jerks in their place, but sometimes I rise to the occasion and kick ass.
There was this guy being a jerk on the internet so I used my amazing hacker skills to track him down then shot him in the face. When the cops came they were like "WTF?" and I was all "He was a jerk on the net!" and they said "lol" then shot him in the face as well. Then we drove to Tijuana to get tattoos.
In high school, there was this jerk in one of my classes who took every opportunity to make fun of me. So, one day we're waiting for the teacher to come in and he's just being loud and obnoxious and mocking me. After a few minutes of this I say "Would you just SHUT UP?" and he starts to say something else, but gets interrupted because the girl sitting in front of me turns around and goes "Yes, please do." after that, the whole class chimes in with various statements of agreement and telling him to drop it and/or leave me alone. He didn't bother me anymore.
It wasn't really me putting him in his place, but it was hilarious. A whole room full of your peers defending you is a good feeling.
There's also the time I hit a guy with a pen in front of a table full of teachers, who then laughed and told him to stop provoking me if he didn't want to get hurt. That was pretty cool.
It wasn't really me putting him in his place, but it was hilarious. A whole room full of your peers defending you is a good feeling.
There's also the time I hit a guy with a pen in front of a table full of teachers, who then laughed and told him to stop provoking me if he didn't want to get hurt. That was pretty cool.
What happened was I was out walking around one night with two friends, when he drove by and started yelling shit at us, and throwing empty gatoraide bottles at us (and missed by a mile every time for the record). So after he circled the blocks a few times I realized we were near my house and that would probably be his next target (in months prior he trashed my yard and I called the cops on him. He got out of the charges cause his father was a officer though).sinclose said:
So my two friends and I take off down the street towards my house, expecting a fight. He gets there a few seconds after us and he and his friends start shouting things out the car. Another car pulls up behind them and the driver was a friend of my friend. They saw what was going on and decided to back us up. So the four guys get out of the friends car and we all start walking towards the ass holes. They start to drive away through a parking lot next to my house.
The friends friend got back in his car and pulled around to the other side of the parking lot (there are two entrances to this parking lot). With the ass holes cornered we started screaming at them, telling them they got the fight they have been asking for. All they did was roll up the windows and not look at as. They eventually cracked their windows and a smell of shit started to pour out, and they rest of them were taunting the one who had shit his pants.