U.S. Air Force Wants Soldiers to Be Like Batman

[PoliceBox63]

An army of Batmans.... OoO

 

[Creepybard]

Your tax dollars at work. Meanwhile people go hungry and/or are homeless.

HEY... shutup Let em join the air force and become batman, then they wont be hungry or homeless xP

 

[strum4h]

If they gave me all the gadgets and I was allowed to speak in a really deep voice I would signup STAT.

 

[CaptainCrunch]

Not to nitpick, but Batman's ability to instinctively 'know' what criminals are in town and what they're up to based on seemingly meaningless smaller crimes is itself a superpower. I doubt an army of gadget-clad airmen could sniff out the Riddler's corn maze hideout based on a kernel of popcorn found in a cave in Afghanistan.

Also, I hope they commercialize some of the Bat-tech they'll be working on for this. I would totally carry around a grapnel, just because it's awesome.

/capeswoosh

 

[Thorvan]

DRA's lead test engineer recalls thinking: "You know what would be really cool? Something like what Batman has on his belt that he can take out and wing it up to a power line and get power."

Best military official quote EVER.

 

[oranger]

Well, somehow I don't think this will overcome the difference in the ability of US soldiers versus that of many other armies.
If you don't know, check up on how many friendly fire incidents US troops have every time they enter a theater of war, and compare it to any other army.

This is just the latest in a long string of "optimization" attempts that ignore the real problem.

 

[Canid117]

So the Air Force wants an army of Batmen, the Marines want an army of Robert Heinlein style power troopers and... what fictional creation does the army want to emulate?

 

[KaiRai]

That's awesome, but how the hell did they come up with this idea?

"JOHNSON! What is that you have there!?"
"IT's a comic sir, the man has a lot of field gagetry but still flies everywhere!"
"Light field gagetry you say...."

 

[LightOfDarkness]

Do they get wristguards with blades on them?

Have they got the quite-sharp-looking-yet-surprisingly-non-lethal Batarangs?

Will they not kill terrorists?

 

[Matt_LRR]

If a can of Bat Shark-repellant isn't standard issue with every kit, I will consider this program a failure.

-m

 

[Hawk of Battle]

So the Air Force wants an army of Batmen, the Marines want an army of Robert Heinlein style power troopers and... what fictional creation does the army want to emulate?

The Imperial Guard?

 

[Ignatz_Zwakh]

Surreal image of a squad of US soldiers in pseudo Batman garb crouching around a bunch of rocks waiting for a convoy to pass. One of them brandishes a batarang and slowly stands...

 

[Towels]

So the Air Force wants an army of Batmen, the Marines want an army of Robert Heinlein style power troopers and... what fictional creation does the Army want to emulate?

My vote goes to Snake Pliskin. And I think he was an Army Ranger too.

 

[Mcupobob]

General- "Sir our soliders are having a hard time fighting insurgent, any suggestions?"

Pres- "Be more like Batman!"

Thats how I imagine it went down.

 

[teutonicman]

Who doesn't want their soldiers to be like Batman?

Could you imagine an army of Batmen invading your country?! I don't think it would even be possible to mount a threatening defence against a force like that.

 

[RowdyRodimus]

If this really happens, then war is about to get way more awesome.

Also, I see some truly awesome videogames taking inspiration from this, I mean, Batman as a soldier, it's like COD meets Arkham Asylum.... the mind boggles.

I'm picturing a game set after the Dark Knight Returns (Strikes Again never happened) with Batmans army cleaning up the world which I guess would lead to Bioshock...

Your tax dollars at work. Meanwhile people go hungry and/or are homeless.

Well we could always cut foreign aid and giving millions to 3rd World Countries after every hurricane and tsunami and use that money in our own neighborhoods. Especially since the money we give usually ends up in the coffers of the rulers of said country and never ends up helping the people at all. That way we can have Batman on the frontline and the people of our country taken care of. That's my choice.

 

[cobrausn]

Holy IEDs, Batman!

Your tax dollars at work. Meanwhile people go hungry and/or are homeless.

Well that filled my naivete quota for the day, thank you.

 

[Arcanist]

Your tax dollars at work. Meanwhile people go hungry and/or are homeless.

Well, to be fair, one of the reasons our military budget is so bloated is because soldiers carry so much gear around. I'm all for programs that cut down on the bulk and focus more on soldiers carrying what they'll actually use.

More on topic, this is an idea I can really get behind. Have you ever lugged 160 pounds of gear while marching full tilt through shitty weather? I haven't, but our troops do this every day. Finding a way to cut down on that bloat would make our troops so much more effective.

 

[DSK-]

I can just imagine soldiers going into battle screaming "Nanananananananananana BATMAAAAN!" off the top of their lungs. That would probably scare any poor soul who witnessed such a thing.

Off-topic: Hah, I just thought of what Apocalypse Now would be like if the Huey's played the Batman theme tune. Happy days.