Unexpected News: The Wachowski Sisters! Second Wachowski Sibling Comes Out As Trans.

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Saelune

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I'm not ok with people force outing people...BUUUUUUUUUT when you are super famous people, I'm less sympathetic. Hiding yourself sends a bad message to those who do NOT have money and fans that will support you regardless. Sure being so famous there will be backlash, but same for regular non famous LGBT people, ones who wont have people that they can be guaranteed will continue to love and support them. Closeted celebrities piss me off.
 

Jack Action

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KyuubiNoKitsune-Hime said:
Jack Action said:
...why in the hell are their private lives news?
For several reasons:
[ol]
[li]Some people have a sick fascination with who might be gay or trans.[/li]
[li]Some "news" outlets use someone's status as a GSM[footnote]Gender and Sexuality Minority[/footnote] as a personal and political attack.[/li]
[li]Most people are fascinated with the personal lives of any celebrity.[/li]
[li]Members of the GSM/LGBTQIA+ community wear their identities proudly, this includes celebrities.[/li]
[li]When a celebrity comes out as gay, trans, or something, a lot of people in the GSM/LGBTQIA+ community see it as personal validation.[/li]
[/ol]

Besides that, transitioning is something the public notices, celebrities are public figures, so this private information doesn't stay private. Besides that there are only two kinds of trans people whose trans status is fully private; those in the closet and those who are stealth and have passing gender presentation. Many trans folk don't pass during transition, many don't pass after transition, and many of us are actually open about being trans, just to name a few reasons why this "private" thing tends to get a lot of public attention. When it's a celebrity, many come out so they can be activists for trans rights, other shittier celebrities, like Caitlyn Jenner, come out so they can capitalize on being something the general public thinks is "crazy", "weird", and "freakish"... So using a "news" article as a hit piece also sells a lot of papers/magazines. The reason Lilly Wachowski is in the news is because she had to preempt the Daily Fail Mail shit-rag tabloid in coming out, before they outed her in a supremely negative fashion.
Okay, so several valid reasons and I'm not sure how to put this without annoying you again, but... it just doesn't seem like it should go past "call them sisters now," unless it's an LGBT-oriented magazine, in which case I wouldn't say it shouldn't be news, because I know how important it is to have people who you identify with (there ain't a lot of straight guys who are apparently more attractive to straight men than straight women, I'll tell you that much), even though I think it's grossly overestimated these days. It's just I dunno... I'd be pretty pissed if the internet was suddenly covered in pix of me wearing a speedo, y'know? Let'em call a press conference if they want (though it could be considered self-centered).
 

The Jovian

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KyuubiNoKitsune-Hime said:
Yeah, I wouldn't call the Daily Fail Mail a news paper, they're a shit-rag tabloid on some level lower than the defunct Weekly World News. I dunno the odds of siblings being trans, but it must be minuscule with the low odds of being trans at all, plus the odds of being a successful anything.
Well the music duo Tegan and Sara (the "Everything is Awesome" gals) are twins, both are gay and both are successful so the odds aren't as improbable as you may think. Still it's great to see that both of the Wachowskis had the courage to come out as trans, let's just hope that their next film is better than their last one (long shot I know).
 

Lightknight

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Saelune said:
I'm not ok with people force outing people...BUUUUUUUUUT when you are super famous people, I'm less sympathetic. Hiding yourself sends a bad message to those who do NOT have money and fans that will support you regardless. Sure being so famous there will be backlash, but same for regular non famous LGBT people, ones who wont have people that they can be guaranteed will continue to love and support them. Closeted celebrities piss me off.
I think it's more that they just don't want a big deal made out of it than necessarily that they're trying to keep it a secret. Every interview and piece you run into end up focusing on the fact that you're not naturally the sex you're presenting as.

It is different than a person who is just gay and wants to hide it. For a trans person they just want to be treated as their gender identity and for it to be treated like normal.
 

Silvanus

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Lightknight said:
There is an entire field of journalistic ethics for exactly this sort of thing. The way the journalist comes up with the information is really important to how ethical it is. If the person was presenting in public then it falls out of being automatically unethical into the realm of discretion. If it's a public figure then most often it is deemed appropriate news. There are qualifiers to that, of course, but generally if you can walk into public and observe it clear as day then it's on the table and free of ethical concerns.
I wouldn't agree with that. How one uses the information is also pretty important, and the Mail has a history of using this kind of information as the basis for hit-pieces.

The individual has a right to let their neighbours and workmates know without the world at large knowing. The lines should be theirs to draw.

Lightknight said:
From the context of the article, it sounded like the journalist wanted to sit down with Lily and get her perspective on everything. He stated that this would be far better than a tabloid breaking the news.

That doesn't indicate that this instance was a hit piece or that if she didn't want it it would happen anyways. But again, it is also clear that this newspaper itself looks very much like a tabloid itself.

I would be interested in seeing this particular journalist's prior works. We could have a situation of a new journalist just trying to enter the market or we could have the exact same journalist who wrote the hit piece on the previous transgender teacher. If it's the same person, then it would be nice to put a face to this practice rather than just waving our hands at the company that has dozens of contributors.
I'll just say that I've got quite a lot of experience with the Daily Mail, and would speedily discount the possibility that the journalist intended to get her perspective and present it sensitively. That would be a colossal break of character for the paper. Were it another paper, I may not be so cynical.

Happyninja42 said:
But, I mean if you are going out in public, and you are celebrity, someone who is always being followed by the media, how would you even expect it to not be picked up and reported? I mean, like I said, it's perfectly legal for people to publish information in the public circle, about thigns that are happening publicly. If I don't want anyone to know about my Purple Hat deal, I shouldn't be going out wearing a giant purple hat. Whether my neighbors know isn't really relevant, I'm making the conscious choice to go out, presenting myself in a way that is going to attract attention, and will be published. I can't really then cry foul for them doing exactly that.

I'm a firm believer in celebrities being able to have a private life, and it being private, and that it's not my fucking business if they don't want to share it with me. But that stance kind of goes out the window in my opinion, when they are no longer keeping it private, and are instead making it publicly known.
Well, we don't know how open she was being. We know her workmates knew, that's about all. She may have been very discreet about her identity outside of that sphere.

Happyninja42 said:
You say it's unethical for the media to publish in the above Purple Hat example, but what about the random person who decides to take a photo of me, and put it on their facebook page "Hey check it out! Saw this guy wearing a crazy hat, walking down the street!" Are they being unethical? If they knew who I was, would it be unethical, compared to them simply posting a picture of a guy in a funny hat? What if that innocent post, then someone goes "Hey! That's Happyninja42! I never knew he identified as a Purple Hat guy! Holy shit! I have to tweet about this!" How could I not expect that to happen, if I am going out in public, openly presenting myself as a Purple Hatter? To expect the entire world to not react, or comment, or share this information that I have presented to them publicly at this point seems irrational.
I didn't say it was unethical for purple hat picture to be published. There's vital context here; gender identity presents an extremely sensitive time in somebody's life. Publishing this information is far more likely to have drastic consequences than an innocuous purple hat (however trendy it may be).
 

KyuubiNoKitsune-Hime

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Saelune said:
I'm not ok with people force outing people...BUUUUUUUUUT when you are super famous people, I'm less sympathetic. Hiding yourself sends a bad message to those who do NOT have money and fans that will support you regardless. Sure being so famous there will be backlash, but same for regular non famous LGBT people, ones who wont have people that they can be guaranteed will continue to love and support them. Closeted celebrities piss me off.
Well Lilly wasn't closeted so much as she'd gone as stealth as possible until she was sure she was ready to come out. She was forced to come out before she was ready because of a shit right-wing tabloid rag was gonna use the information to demonize her. It's unreasonable to expect people to come out before they're ready, celebrity, or not, they're still people dealing with their own issues in their own way. It's not right to hold someone to a completely different standard just because they're a public figure, as in being a celebrity. I'd much rather a celebrity come out at their own pace, if they come out at all, rather than seeing them get forced out when they're unwilling. Especially because it's situations like that which can lead to people taking their own lives. Celebrity, or not, this sort of thing is a personal choice for anyone, one that's really not anyone else's business, even after the person comes out.

Jack Action said:
Okay, so several valid reasons and I'm not sure how to put this without annoying you again, but... it just doesn't seem like it should go past "call them sisters now," unless it's an LGBT-oriented magazine, in which case I wouldn't say it shouldn't be news, because I know how important it is to have people who you identify with (there ain't a lot of straight guys who are apparently more attractive to straight men than straight women, I'll tell you that much), even though I think it's grossly overestimated these days. It's just I dunno... I'd be pretty pissed if the internet was suddenly covered in pix of me wearing a speedo, y'know? Let'em call a press conference if they want (though it could be considered self-centered).
I wouldn't say that you annoyed me there, or with this last post either. At any rate, I was just explaining that there's a public fascination on both sides for these sorts of subjects. That fascination makes it extremely difficult for even non-celebrity folk to not be outed and harassed, it's magnitudes worse for someone who is a celebrity. There are people who wish to use the information to attack a person, others who have good intentions... When it comes to GSM folk, a lot of people refuse to respect our personal boundaries. Why do think us trans folk get so upset when people ask about our surgical status?

Heck look at the post I quoted above this one. There are a lot people who find it offensive that a celebrity might not come out publicly, because of the message it sends to other GSM folk. I mean the intentions might be good, but it's still the idea of violating someone's personal life for an agenda.

The Jovian said:
KyuubiNoKitsune-Hime said:
Yeah, I wouldn't call the Daily Fail Mail a news paper, they're a shit-rag tabloid on some level lower than the defunct Weekly World News. I dunno the odds of siblings being trans, but it must be minuscule with the low odds of being trans at all, plus the odds of being a successful anything.
Well the music duo Tegan and Sara (the "Everything is Awesome" gals) are twins, both are gay and both are successful so the odds aren't as improbable as you may think. Still it's great to see that both of the Wachowskis had the courage to come out as trans, let's just hope that their next film is better than their last one (long shot I know).
Well I wasn't saying the odds were impossible, in fact it was inevitable for a pair of successful trans siblings to come out eventually. It's just a series of uncommon life experiences lining up in such a way, especially with a pair as successful and famous as the Wachowskis, that it was really unexpected.

Being trans I find it nice that we have now a pair of famous trans siblings to talk about. This is especially good news for someone who is sick of hearing about the media whore who spreads misinformation on trans folk to make reality TV money named Caitlyn Jenner.
 

zelda2fanboy

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I agree that outing people is wrong and that newspapers that would do that suck. Also, good for Lilly being honest about herself in a public forum, while making a point about the press. However, the thing that annoys me about this story (and the "it gets better" movement from a few years ago) is a seeming acceptance of suicide as an option. "You know, someone committed suicide when you outed them." Yes, but suicide is something a person does to him or herself. Also, suicide is technically murder. If you rephrase it as "the rates of murdering people when outing is involved," the sympathy factor is decreased I think. This is coming from someone who has known suicide victims and had suicidal thoughts himself. Being depressed doesn't make suicide okay. Suicide isn't a valid reaction to being outed or to being gay or being bullied or to being trans.
 

FirstNameLastName

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Saelune said:
I'm not ok with people force outing people...BUUUUUUUUUT when you are super famous people, I'm less sympathetic. Hiding yourself sends a bad message to those who do NOT have money and fans that will support you regardless. Sure being so famous there will be backlash, but same for regular non famous LGBT people, ones who wont have people that they can be guaranteed will continue to love and support them. Closeted celebrities piss me off.
I disagree. Plenty of people can have their lives ruined by coming out, so regardless what effect they may or may not have on the LGBT community over all, no one should feel obligated to martyr themself "for the cause", especially if they don't feel ready yet.
You're making them sound like pawns in some political game.
 

happyninja42

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FirstNameLastName said:
Saelune said:
I'm not ok with people force outing people...BUUUUUUUUUT when you are super famous people, I'm less sympathetic. Hiding yourself sends a bad message to those who do NOT have money and fans that will support you regardless. Sure being so famous there will be backlash, but same for regular non famous LGBT people, ones who wont have people that they can be guaranteed will continue to love and support them. Closeted celebrities piss me off.
I disagree. Plenty of people can have their lives ruined by coming out, so regardless what effect they may or may not have on the LGBT community over all, no one should feel obligated to martyr themself "for the cause", especially if they don't feel ready yet.
You're making them sound like pawns in some political game.
Oddly enough, I have known people in the LGBTQ community who basically held this exact position. I got into a debate with a friend online about this. He is a fairly open gay rights person, and has made a point to travel the globe as part of a paper for his degree, discussing the representation of LGBTQ from country to country. And he pretty much said that people who are celebrities are basically asking for it by the nature of their lifestyle, and so they should come out, because they could be a role model to others.

I don't remember specifically who, it was some female astronaut, who had recently come out as gay (this was like 5 years ago or so). But she had basically stayed under the radar for her NASA career, and then lived many years without disclosing to anyone. And then she came out. And his stance was that she should've come out decades ago, to be a role model. My view was that it's her life, she's got a right to privacy, she doesn't give that right up simply because she becomes famous. And that if she didn't want to share it with anyone, she didn't have to. And I'm a cis gender white male, and the gay minority guy actually felt "she owed it to the community" to come out. And this is apparently not an uncommon viewpoint. I doubt it's the dominant viewpoint, but it's apparently vocal enough, because I've heard it elsewhere too. Which I find incredibly disturbing, to say that any individual has an obligation to a community to live their lives in a specific way, or else they will be looked down on by that community.
 

FirstNameLastName

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Happyninja42 said:
FirstNameLastName said:
Saelune said:
I'm not ok with people force outing people...BUUUUUUUUUT when you are super famous people, I'm less sympathetic. Hiding yourself sends a bad message to those who do NOT have money and fans that will support you regardless. Sure being so famous there will be backlash, but same for regular non famous LGBT people, ones who wont have people that they can be guaranteed will continue to love and support them. Closeted celebrities piss me off.
I disagree. Plenty of people can have their lives ruined by coming out, so regardless what effect they may or may not have on the LGBT community over all, no one should feel obligated to martyr themself "for the cause", especially if they don't feel ready yet.
You're making them sound like pawns in some political game.
Oddly enough, I have known people in the LGBTQ community who basically held this exact position. I got into a debate with a friend online about this. He is a fairly open gay rights person, and has made a point to travel the globe as part of a paper for his degree, discussing the representation of LGBTQ from country to country. And he pretty much said that people who are celebrities are basically asking for it by the nature of their lifestyle, and so they should come out, because they could be a role model to others.

I don't remember specifically who, it was some female astronaut, who had recently come out as gay (this was like 5 years ago or so). But she had basically stayed under the radar for her NASA career, and then lived many years without disclosing to anyone. And then she came out. And his stance was that she should've come out decades ago, to be a role model. My view was that it's her life, she's got a right to privacy, she doesn't give that right up simply because she becomes famous. And that if she didn't want to share it with anyone, she didn't have to. And I'm a cis gender white male, and the gay minority guy actually felt "she owed it to the community" to come out. And this is apparently not an uncommon viewpoint. I doubt it's the dominant viewpoint, but it's apparently vocal enough, because I've heard it elsewhere too. Which I find incredibly disturbing, to say that any individual has an obligation to a community to live their lives in a specific way, or else they will be looked down on by that community.
Yeah, I'm not unfamiliar with that view, and I too have seen it espoused elsewhere. It just seems so dehumanizing to view people by their utility to the collective and disregard their own rights and desire, especially since some people can be extremely hostile to anyone under the LGBT umbrella.
If people are struggling to come to terms with this type of thing then the last thing they need is their supposed friends insisting they be shoved out into the spotlight or be declared selfish.
 

happyninja42

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Silvanus said:
Happyninja42 said:
But, I mean if you are going out in public, and you are celebrity, someone who is always being followed by the media, how would you even expect it to not be picked up and reported? I mean, like I said, it's perfectly legal for people to publish information in the public circle, about thigns that are happening publicly. If I don't want anyone to know about my Purple Hat deal, I shouldn't be going out wearing a giant purple hat. Whether my neighbors know isn't really relevant, I'm making the conscious choice to go out, presenting myself in a way that is going to attract attention, and will be published. I can't really then cry foul for them doing exactly that.

I'm a firm believer in celebrities being able to have a private life, and it being private, and that it's not my fucking business if they don't want to share it with me. But that stance kind of goes out the window in my opinion, when they are no longer keeping it private, and are instead making it publicly known.
Well, we don't know how open she was being. We know her workmates knew, that's about all. She may have been very discreet about her identity outside of that sphere.
Right, we don't know how open she was being. But we have been discussing two opposite scenarios in this thread. From what you said, or at least how it seemed to me the way you phrased it, that any situation where the individual didn't declare it first, to report said information is unethical on the other parties part. Though I would say that openly presenting yourself in public is pretty much declaring it publicly.

Silvanus said:
Happyninja42 said:
You say it's unethical for the media to publish in the above Purple Hat example, but what about the random person who decides to take a photo of me, and put it on their facebook page "Hey check it out! Saw this guy wearing a crazy hat, walking down the street!" Are they being unethical? If they knew who I was, would it be unethical, compared to them simply posting a picture of a guy in a funny hat? What if that innocent post, then someone goes "Hey! That's Happyninja42! I never knew he identified as a Purple Hat guy! Holy shit! I have to tweet about this!" How could I not expect that to happen, if I am going out in public, openly presenting myself as a Purple Hatter? To expect the entire world to not react, or comment, or share this information that I have presented to them publicly at this point seems irrational.
I didn't say it was unethical for purple hat picture to be published. There's vital context here; gender identity presents an extremely sensitive time in somebody's life. Publishing this information is far more likely to have drastic consequences than an innocuous purple hat (however trendy it may be).
I'm confident based on other posts of yours I've seen over the years that you are aware I was using my Purple Hatness as a neutral example for the discussion. Obviously fashion is not the same as gender identity, but I was trying to describe scenarios about a very volatile subject, using a frame of reference that would hopefully be
1. Slightly amusing, and thus alleviate any escalation of toxicity in the thread. (Not saying there currently is, but if there is any thread topic on this site that can quickly explode, it's transgender discussions)
2. Free of a lot of the knee jerk reactionism when discussing LGBTQ issues, that can quickly cause a discussion to spiral down the tangential rabbit hole, simply due to a specific word used.

My point is that if someone is going out in public, and openly presenting themselves in a specific way, whether it's as male, female, or Purple Hatness, to then say that their privacy has been violated seems contradictory and hypocritical. I'm not saying she should live in the closet, but once you make the choice to be publicly seen in a particular way, you can't get upset at the public for
1. Noticing
and
2. Commenting on it. They do have the right to do that.

It's not an invasion of privacy, it's commenting on what is now public knowledge. It's not as big a deal for people who aren't celebrities, because their exposure to public scrutiny is limited in a lot of ways, but if you are a known celebrity, for making some fairly famous/infamous films, and having an LGBTQ sister who is in the public eye, you have to at least acknowledge that once you start stepping outside, in your new persona, it's going to be noticed. I mean even if you are just going about your daily routine, (going to the gas station, grocery store, local movie theater, etc), people who are familiar with you are probably going to notice. You can't put the entire public under some kind of NDA because you aren't ready to come out yet, which still seems contrary to me, because you know, you're out now. Out and about.

Now again, I don't know the context of how that rag found out. Maybe one of her trusted inner circle spilled the beans, maybe she went out in her female atire, and someone randomly recognized her as the Wachowski, and reported it to the tabloid. Or maybe just the ever present paparazzi who likely follow her family around, for footage of the transgender sister, happened to spot her now as a woman and was like "oh shit, it's two of them now! I'm going to be rich!" I have no idea. As much as I might find their profession distasteful, if they aren't breaking any laws in obtaining their information, there really isn't anything unethical about what they are doing.
 

monkeymangler

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Good on her. Brave decision, even if it was forced upon her by those who lack scruples.

On that note:

#FucktheDailyMail
 

KyuubiNoKitsune-Hime

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zelda2fanboy said:
I agree that outing people is wrong and that newspapers that would do that suck. Also, good for Lilly being honest about herself in a public forum, while making a point about the press. However, the thing that annoys me about this story (and the "it gets better" movement from a few years ago) is a seeming acceptance of suicide as an option. "You know, someone committed suicide when you outed them." Yes, but suicide is something a person does to him or herself. Also, suicide is technically murder. If you rephrase it as "the rates of murdering people when outing is involved," the sympathy factor is decreased I think. This is coming from someone who has known suicide victims and had suicidal thoughts himself. Being depressed doesn't make suicide okay. Suicide isn't a valid reaction to being outed or to being gay or being bullied or to being trans.
Well the biggest drivers of suicide amongst trans folk are: The inability to transition, especially medically. Losing the support of friends and families. Losing one's job and/or being evicted from their homes for being trans, this is also paired with the fact that in most of the US trans folk can also be denied housing and employment opportunities for being trans.

In all honesty being outed as trans has a serious tendency to destroy people's entire lives, even more so than being outed as gay, or lesbian can do that. People who are open to lesbian and gay folk often do not extend that same acceptance, or even tolerance for trans folk. Suicide might not be a valid reaction to being outed as trans, but for many it's the only option they're left with. Just look at the pressure this year alone in US state level bathroom bills, designed to put trans folk in danger by putting us in the wrong bathroom.
 

Lightknight

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Silvanus said:
Lightknight said:
There is an entire field of journalistic ethics for exactly this sort of thing. The way the journalist comes up with the information is really important to how ethical it is. If the person was presenting in public then it falls out of being automatically unethical into the realm of discretion. If it's a public figure then most often it is deemed appropriate news. There are qualifiers to that, of course, but generally if you can walk into public and observe it clear as day then it's on the table and free of ethical concerns.
I wouldn't agree with that. How one uses the information is also pretty important, and the Mail has a history of using this kind of information as the basis for hit-pieces.
Sure, the more I hear about the publication the less I like. But all we know from the interaction is that a guy wanted to interview her and get her word on the whole thing. Unless this is the same guy that spun previous stories then I really don't know. Do good articles ever come out of the publication? For a paper that's around 100 years it'd almost have to have something relevant. But that's me being presumptive that length of time surviving equates to some degree of quality. Unless you read it regularly, then maybe the only times you hear about what another publication did will be negative? I don't recall ever reading an article about another publication doing something good.

The individual has a right to let their neighbours and workmates know without the world at large knowing. The lines should be theirs to draw.
I'm not sure that's correct. Why is that their right and by what standard are you establishing this power as an unalienable right?

Lightknight said:
From the context of the article, it sounded like the journalist wanted to sit down with Lily and get her perspective on everything. He stated that this would be far better than a tabloid breaking the news.

That doesn't indicate that this instance was a hit piece or that if she didn't want it it would happen anyways. But again, it is also clear that this newspaper itself looks very much like a tabloid itself.

I would be interested in seeing this particular journalist's prior works. We could have a situation of a new journalist just trying to enter the market or we could have the exact same journalist who wrote the hit piece on the previous transgender teacher. If it's the same person, then it would be nice to put a face to this practice rather than just waving our hands at the company that has dozens of contributors.
I'll just say that I've got quite a lot of experience with the Daily Mail, and would speedily discount the possibility that the journalist intended to get her perspective and present it sensitively. That would be a colossal break of character for the paper. Were it another paper, I may not be so cynical.
That's totally possible, I have literally no experience with the publication so I fully accept my unfortunate position of ignorance on the topic. I just don't see why they would need to interview her if they were just going to run a hit piece anyways. If you know she's transgendered and are just planning a hit piece then why go through the trouble of setting up an interview? I mean, I get that you could be completely right here but the interaction seemed different than what I'd expect.

FYI, I know the two responses below were to HappyNinja. Just joining into the interesting conversation too.
Well, we don't know how open she was being. We know her workmates knew, that's about all. She may have been very discreet about her identity outside of that sphere.
If that were the case then both Happyninja and I would probably agree that foregoing reporting on it would be the industry standard just like what they do in most instances of homosexuality back when it was a problem for people if they came out. Still, a male actor kissing a male lover in public would still hit the news no matter what they held back on prior when it wasn't publicly expressed.

I didn't say it was unethical for purple hat picture to be published. There's vital context here; gender identity presents an extremely sensitive time in somebody's life. Publishing this information is far more likely to have drastic consequences than an innocuous purple hat (however trendy it may be).
While I completely understand this on a deeply personal level (having watched my transgender husband come out to friends and ultimately be abandoned by most of them for starting to present as a him), I still think if done in public that it is on the clear side of ethics from a journalist perspective. My hope would be that now that this information is out that Lily can now just be Lily and stop having to hide. I hope she gets the support she needs to get through this transition in a healthy manner.

But, if the paper decides to make this into some kind of hit piece or if they obtained this information through unethical means, fuck-em. I just find it strange that they would actually spend the money and time to put real boots on the ground to obtain legitimate quotes from the horse's mouth just to throw that away and say whatever they damn well please. She is famous enough and this news was breaking enough that they would have done wonderfully just by making it an interview and not a separate news piece at all.
 

Something Amyss

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Happyninja42 said:
Yep, I remember hearing that shortly after she came out, and was like "Ah, yes that works just fine, no gender slipups at all"
That's one way of looking at it. "The QWachowskis" also sounds better in my mind than "Wachowski siblings."

I probably won't lose any sleep whatever they call themselves.

Yeah, I didn't actually read the article, so I missed the bit where they specified it was the other half of the Matrix duo.
In fairness, I double checked simply because they could have reported it wrong. Seen a lot of bad reporting on this.

As to the quality of their work, I'm sort of middle of the road with them. I loved, and still love the original Matrix movie, as it had some parts that to this day, stir my emotions. Plus it was just fun to watch.
About the nly thing I liked from the original Matrix was the novelty of the visuals. I found the plot lame, the action mostly just okay, the characters bad, and the actors uncharismatic. Well, minus Fishburne and Weaving. I don't know, it gets kind f uncomfortable ragging on them right now though, because people often use "I don't like what they do" to justify why it's okay to discriminate against someone who's a minority or the like. Their talent (or lack of) doesn't really impact their gender identity.

It's more I don't pay very close attention to them, so you could have told me that it was a third sister coming out, and I wouldn't have really known the difference. ==

That's what she said! (she being you in this case) Also what I said! xD
Yeah, was kinda posting on a lag this morning and afternoon. Loaded up the page at least several minutes before I hit reply.

Also, I use "that's what she said" way too much. >.>
 

Silvanus

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Happyninja42 said:
Right, we don't know how open she was being. But we have been discussing two opposite scenarios in this thread. From what you said, or at least how it seemed to me the way you phrased it, that any situation where the individual didn't declare it first, to report said information is unethical on the other parties part. Though I would say that openly presenting yourself in public is pretty much declaring it publicly.
As I said, there are levels of publicity. I don't hide my sexuality from my friends or co-workers. It would still be a shitty thing to do to splash it over a tabloid. That would make me feel tremendously open and vulnerable, but I can't speak for anyone else.

Happyninja42 said:
I'm confident based on other posts of yours I've seen over the years that you are aware I was using my Purple Hatness as a neutral example for the discussion. Obviously fashion is not the same as gender identity, but I was trying to describe scenarios about a very volatile subject, using a frame of reference that would hopefully be
1. Slightly amusing, and thus alleviate any escalation of toxicity in the thread. (Not saying there currently is, but if there is any thread topic on this site that can quickly explode, it's transgender discussions)
2. Free of a lot of the knee jerk reactionism when discussing LGBTQ issues, that can quickly cause a discussion to spiral down the tangential rabbit hole, simply due to a specific word used.

My point is that if someone is going out in public, and openly presenting themselves in a specific way, whether it's as male, female, or Purple Hatness, to then say that their privacy has been violated seems contradictory and hypocritical. I'm not saying she should live in the closet, but once you make the choice to be publicly seen in a particular way, you can't get upset at the public for
1. Noticing
and
2. Commenting on it. They do have the right to do that.
The public can comment on what they like, but we know that tabloid sensationalism goes further than that. The Mail know, too, which is why they do things like this.

(On a side-note, don't be put off by my unsmiling, Snapish demeanour. I found the purple hatness appropriate & amusing; just felt the need to emphasise the life-changing aspect of personal matters like this).

Happyninja42 said:
As much as I might find their profession distasteful, if they aren't breaking any laws in obtaining their information, there really isn't anything unethical about what they are doing.
Unfortunately, using legality as the bar for print-media ethics in the UK is really using no bar at all. The only existing complaints watchdog here is toothless, and operates only with the sufferance of the newspapers themselves. Newspapers can do almost whatever they want, here, and be declared squeaky clean. That's the only real legal mechanism in place, and it doesn't do its job.

Lightknight said:
Sure, the more I hear about the publication the less I like. But all we know from the interaction is that a guy wanted to interview her and get her word on the whole thing. Unless this is the same guy that spun previous stories then I really don't know. Do good articles ever come out of the publication? For a paper that's around 100 years it'd almost have to have something relevant. But that's me being presumptive that length of time surviving equates to some degree of quality. Unless you read it regularly, then maybe the only times you hear about what another publication did will be negative? I don't recall ever reading an article about another publication doing something good.
I do actually read it regularly, as a result of knowing somebody who takes it (yet doesn't agree with it most of the time). Fair articles have come out of it, but never on issues of sexuality or gender identity.

Lightknight said:
I'm not sure that's correct. Why is that their right and by what standard are you establishing this power as an unalienable right?
It's their right because it's their person, and because tremendous harm-- both mental and physical-- can be done if it's not respected.

Lightknight said:
That's totally possible, I have literally no experience with the publication so I fully accept my unfortunate position of ignorance on the topic. I just don't see why they would need to interview her if they were just going to run a hit piece anyways. If you know she's transgendered and are just planning a hit piece then why go through the trouble of setting up an interview? I mean, I get that you could be completely right here but the interaction seemed different than what I'd expect.
Well, I'd guess they need some basis for the article, and were quote-mining.

Hell, I might be wrong. This might be a reasonable journalist. The probability is just low.
 

Something Amyss

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KyuubiNoKitsune-Hime said:
Suicide might not be a valid reaction to being outed as trans, but for many it's the only option they're left with. Just look at the pressure this year alone in US state level bathroom bills, designed to put trans folk in danger by putting us in the wrong bathroom.
Suicide also doesn't have to be a rational option. We're talking about an emotionally charged issue and emotionally charged outcomes.

Not that I don't get your point. I spent most of my teen years just wanting the hell I was being put through to stop. The fact that other people shouldn't have to go through that is probably the primary reason I get so damn vocal on the subject. Suicide seemed like the only valid option. But when emotions run high, it doesn't even have to be that.
Happyninja42 said:
But that stance kind of goes out the window in my opinion, when they are no longer keeping it private, and are instead making it publicly known.
[/quote]

Even accepting for a moment that she was "open" outside of the friends and family she said knew, we're still talking about a situation placing undue danger on her. This has great capacity to cause harm and zero informative effect, meaning that from the standpoint of journalistic (and most forms of) ethics, this should not be happening. That anything claiming to even be remotely associated with journalism would out or support outing someone like this, ignoring all other factors, should be outright unacceptable.

It shouldn't matter if she told ten people or ten thousand, outing her is still an act that violates both her privacy and any ethical standard I can think of.
 

Saelune

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Lightknight said:
Saelune said:
I'm not ok with people force outing people...BUUUUUUUUUT when you are super famous people, I'm less sympathetic. Hiding yourself sends a bad message to those who do NOT have money and fans that will support you regardless. Sure being so famous there will be backlash, but same for regular non famous LGBT people, ones who wont have people that they can be guaranteed will continue to love and support them. Closeted celebrities piss me off.
I think it's more that they just don't want a big deal made out of it than necessarily that they're trying to keep it a secret. Every interview and piece you run into end up focusing on the fact that you're not naturally the sex you're presenting as.

It is different than a person who is just gay and wants to hide it. For a trans person they just want to be treated as their gender identity and for it to be treated like normal.
Would be quicker for it to seem normal if famous people who the mainstream public can see and hopefully come to understand would not be so secretive. I can understand wanting it to not become the "focus" of who they are, but not discussing it doesn't help. Its easier for people to have positive examples that humanize it for them. When its just "those people" its easier to hate them.
 

WolfThomas

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DudeistBelieve said:
Still what are the odds both of them would be? Then again, what are the odds they'd both be successful film makers? Funny old world, ain't it?
Considering it has happened. 100%.

But that's being facetious I know what you mean. What the odds any pair of siblings will be both trans and filmmakers. Probably low. But the thing is with enough of a sample size these things happen. That's the thing with statistics.
 

KyuubiNoKitsune-Hime

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Saelune said:
Lightknight said:
Saelune said:
I'm not ok with people force outing people...BUUUUUUUUUT when you are super famous people, I'm less sympathetic. Hiding yourself sends a bad message to those who do NOT have money and fans that will support you regardless. Sure being so famous there will be backlash, but same for regular non famous LGBT people, ones who wont have people that they can be guaranteed will continue to love and support them. Closeted celebrities piss me off.
I think it's more that they just don't want a big deal made out of it than necessarily that they're trying to keep it a secret. Every interview and piece you run into end up focusing on the fact that you're not naturally the sex you're presenting as.

It is different than a person who is just gay and wants to hide it. For a trans person they just want to be treated as their gender identity and for it to be treated like normal.
Would be quicker for it to seem normal if famous people who the mainstream public can see and hopefully come to understand would not be so secretive. I can understand wanting it to not become the "focus" of who they are, but not discussing it doesn't help. Its easier for people to have positive examples that humanize it for them. When its just "those people" its easier to hate them.
Well it's also important to remember this: These things are personal and it's unreasonable to demand people come out before they're ready. They don't owe the community anything, celebrity or not, especially not to out themselves just because it might help the image of GSM folk, especially not before they're ready to do so.

WolfThomas said:
DudeistBelieve said:
Still what are the odds both of them would be? Then again, what are the odds they'd both be successful film makers? Funny old world, ain't it?
Considering it has happened. 100%.

But that's being facetious I know what you mean. What the odds any pair of brothers brothers, or sisters will be both trans and filmmakers. Probably low. But the thing is with enough of a sample size these things happen. That's the thing with statistics.
Fixed that slight error for you, hopefully so people won't make a big deal over it. It's unwise to give a singular gender to a group of people who may be either gender. Also you refer to people in the way in which they identify, even if you're talking about a them past-tense in time before they transitioned. Trans women are always women, trans men are always men, etc... It's also kinda important to remember that there are trans men as well as trans women. Not trying to be mean, or a smart-ass here either, just clearing this up before someone gets angry over it.