What do you think the above users deepest darkest secrets are?

[UnusualStranger]

Hatches plots to destroy all buttons.

 

[Robert632]

Has so many hats that the combined weight of all of them could crush the moon.

 

[trust Milo]

Tried to crush the moon and failed

 

[Xpwn3ntial]

Is just a moon wannabe.

 

[Troublesome Lagomorph]

Fails at moonwalking.

 

[Robert632]

Walks the talk, but doesn't talk to pies.

 

[UnusualStranger]

Is dangerously close friends with different foods.

 

[Troublesome Lagomorph]

Barely escaped becoming a witch's pie.

 

[UnusualStranger]

Just lost their can of troll spray, and can't afford more.

 

[Robert632]

Is selling cheese at ridiculously high prices.

 

[Xpwn3ntial]

Buys the cheese anyway.

 

[UnusualStranger]

Is trying to corner the market in toast sales.

 

[Scde2]

Is the competition.

 

[Xpwn3ntial]

Is Ayn Rand.

 

[Robert632]

Has the biggest cock on the farm.

 

[Scde2]

Is Bernie Mac's reincarnation.

 

[Robert632]

Is Billy Mays in disguise.

 

[BrailleOperatic]

He actually DOES need no education and actually DOES need no thought control.

 

[UnusualStranger]

Is experimenting on why people try to see if the light is still on in the fridge after they close it.

 

[Robert632]

Is facinated by things that go poo.