What is your deal breaker?

[Stalk3rchief]

Oh this already happened to me so it's easy.
The girl I met treated me better than my last girlfriends, we listened to the same music and liked the same stuff and blah,blah, blah, got along alot, etc.etc.
A while in I caught her cutting herself and that was the begining of the end.
I hate people that can't deal with life, especially when their lives aren't that bad really.

Woah, hold on there Rockfeller: your girlfriend was nice and all, you got along pretty well, and she was CUTTING HERSELF?! What in the fuck?

Yeah idk. Everything was great, but apparently she just had to cut herself or she got manically depressed. I tried to work it out, help her, work with her, but anything that involved her NOT cutting herself was apparently not an option. :/

 

[OmniscientOstrich]

A lot of these things such as personality traits seem to be those which would indicate you wouldn't date this girl in the first place, not an unpleasent discovery about someone you otherwise thought was perfect for you.

OT: If they are racist/homophobic/bigoted then I couldn't. I admit I have the odd friend who can be like this (I don't know to what extent they're serious) and I can grit my teeth and put up with their ignorant bullshit in small doses, but I simply could not engage in a relationship with someone who upheld these views. Others include religious fundamentalism and drug use. Really I think that's about it, I don't hold too much expectation on others when I'm no prize either.

 

[Bernzz]

Spelling and grammar as atrocious as the title of the thread.

But really: excess stupid, or a smoker. Big turn offs.

 

[trollnystan]

When they misuse apostrophes. So you're out OP.

(More) Serious answer? I've never been in a relationship, but religion might be one. If the guy was extremely religious and would want to raise any potential children in his faith then no, I probably couldn't handle that. If I ever do have kids I'd want to expose them to different religions and ways of thinking throughout their childhood and teens so they then could make an informed decision when they reached adulthood. Rose-coloured glasses maybe, but that's how I think.

Also, leaving Sweden would be hard for me. It depends on what country I'd have to move to, but if the relationship demanded that of me I don't know if I could.

Oh and what @Gabes" said: Narcissism. Ugh.

EDIT: A different topic made me remember that I wouldn't be able to date a smoker. So consider that added to the list of deal breakers.

 

[BakaSmurf]

Smoking, racial intolerance, narcissicm, idiocy in general. Being a git is a good way to make me not like you really fast.

Of course I can't be especially picky, I'm not exactly a prize catch myself, what with giving off the impression of being a mean, humourless loner (it really sucks when people judge you based off of the expression on your face alone, let me tell you).

 

[enistoja]

Lies. Or being manipulated. Which just happened two weeks ago with a girl I had been going after for something short of three years.
The feelings crashed, turned upside down, and ended up in the middle of a nuclear blast.

 

[merman]

If she doesn't have opinions. I don't care if she's stupid, I've been out with stupid. But they must have a sense of self, with opinions on things (not just regurgitated opinions but thoughts of her own).

My last girlfriend, everything was either "the best thing ever" or "the worst thing ever". There was no middle ground. That coupled with the mood swings and the long-distance aspect killed it.

I'm also thinking back to the episode of Frasier where he tries to commit to Julia, and everything she does winds him and his family up - there are definitely times when you have to take a person as they are for the relationship to move forward.

 

[linkblade91]

Intelligence is a major determining factor for any lady who catches my eye.
She could be the most beautiful woman in the world, but if she's an idiot, no deal!

Then again, she is the most beautiful woman in the world...all I can say is that she damn well better be a red-head! lol

 

[Mavinchious Maximus]

Not being human is a pretty big one for me.

I will enjoy my Krogan wife thank you very much. phht...

 

[Mandalore_15]

For me it would be crassness and perversion, basically cussing a lot, talking about sexual things casually, and an overall lack of etiquette and manners. No matter how attractive or intelligent she is that would break the deal for me.

Wow... now see, I wish my girlfriend did that more often!

I think the deal breaker for me would be if she was dumb, particularly if it manifested itself in a belief in some preposterous religion. I would be out of there pretty damn fast.

 

[WanderingBiscuits]

EDIT:It told me that it didn't post and then it double posted??? why???.Anyhow See post two below

 

[Raognerrrm]

Seriously? Crassness and open about sexuality is a problem? Those women are the easiest to hang out. They tend to be honest and direct, no bullshitting or mind games. I've always loved those girls, too bad they've always had boyfriends when I knew em, hell of a good friend though.

But... I love mind games...

OT: Deal breakers are:
1. Not being of the same religion. I just don't see how I'm supposed to connect to someone emotionally to that extent while they don't have the same general overview of life that I do.
2. Being unintelligent. I don't mind if they're not a super-genius, but I do want to be able to hold a conversation about complex stuff.
3. Being male. I am firmly heterosexual, and also male. Not going there.
4. Being completely trusting. This is a strange one, but I don't want someone who will accept everything I tell them without question.
5. Swearing a lot. I just don't like it.
6. Smoking. See 5 for reason.
7. Having a horrible personality. For example, if one of their pastimes was tearing wings of flies, that would be a run-as-fast-as-possible-away-from-them situation. If they were cruel or had inconsistent, irreversible morals, or were unfaithful, this would be a problem.
8. Not excepting who I am. I AM ME!!!!!! If they don't like me, find someone else.
9. Insisting that the number 10 is TEH BOMB and should always be used for everything.

 

[WanderingBiscuits]

I have three
---

Constant whining
= Come to me about your problems, Thats fine but don't ***** and moan daily about every little thing!

Being unable to hold interesting or fun conversations
= I want to get to know you. Please don't make yourself our topic of discussion every conversation though, m'kay?

Flirting with others
= I find it disrepectful and I am the jealous type, so it would bother me.

---

Regarding what many people have mentioned in this thread, I wouldn't really break a relationship with someone because they liked something that i didn't. If they wanna like Twilight or The Star Wars Prequels [UGH] thats up to them.

 

[ryougahimura]

Mind games. Just tell me what you mean/want. Can't read your mind. If you can't tell me what I did wrong? Don't be shocked when I keep doing it. This ended my last relationship cause I just end up being afraid of the other person.

It was that first really serious one that always seems to take a major toll.

 

[Devil's Due]

My three main areas are the following:

1) Drug user (instant no)
2) Smoker (instant no)
3) Alcohol drinker (depending on amount and frequency. I'm not interested in a drunk)

After that, it simply gets into the minor areas, such as I refuse to date someone who has obviously severe emotional issues (I've had WAY too many relationships with this to ride that crazy train ever again), being ignorant / racist, such things as that. Past history does not play a factor in this, as long as the main criteria's are fulfilled. Mainly the three areas are instant disqualifiers, no slack given. The other areas count up in tallies, and too many against the person and I'm out.

I'm very picky, because I know what I want and I'm not going to change myself for them.

 

[thenumberthirteen]

Cheating. I hate it when a girlfriend cheats on me loads. A little bit can be ok, but if it's every night with a different person then that's where I draw the line.

Also if she's a Young Earth Creationist. That's far worse.

 

[Ghengis John]

There's a lot of things I could put up with. So long as a person has a good heart you'd be surprised what you can forgive if you get to know them a little. There's a reason that humorless, pushy, immature and ego centric people manage to find people who loves them. That said there are three things I cannot abide.

The use of drugs. Not talking about aspirin here.

Lack of intelligence. If I can't confer with a girl and find some wisdom there then I have nobody to bounce my ideas off of, discuss ideological matters with or to get a reliable second opinion from. I need to be able to trust in your intelligence sometimes because I know that I make mistakes.

Any combination of sex and excrement. No.

 

[Dfskelleton]

One of these:
Smoking: I cannot stand that habit.
Stupidity: I like to have intelligent conversations.
Intolerance: If she doesn't like me because of my religion or my personality, she's not right.
No sense of humor: I like to share laughs with others.

 

[Vault101]

"issues"

mental instability..sociopathy...substance abuse..being an emotional wreck..that kind of stuff

 

[Griffolion]

Smoking. It sickens me to my core; she can be perfect in every other way, but she either quits or I'm out of there.