What it means to be a man

[Samurai Goomba]

Um, I urinate sitting down. And I'll beat the crap out of anyone who has a problem with that. While reading Preacher.

A real man is so manly he MAKES the rules on what's manly and what isn't.

And seriously, Friends is telling you what's manly and what's not? And you're listening? If there are any more metrosexual/wimpy males than the cast of Friends, I haven't met them. Big Gay Al looks tougher than the dudes in Friends.

 

[Faps]

Dude, you broke your back I think that excuses you from peeing standing up, especially if you couple it with a story involving a bear.

I pee standing up because it seems quicker, I can have a stretch if I want and if I'm in a public toilet I can read the graffiti on the walls.

 

[Diablini]

This is an absolutely idiotic question.

 

[bug_chaser]

I'm so manly that I converted the bathroom cabinet into a beer fridge. Now there's no room to hold toilet paper, but I'm so manly that I use sandpaper anyways.

 

[NewGeekPhilosopher]

There's more to it than that, first of all you have to be considered not a homosexual (which on the internet is vaguely defined/increasingly offensive to straight people who do things that get them lumped in this group without even being attracted to the same gender), you have to not be fat (which is often hypocritical), not earn less money than your wife, and for some reason you have to be a fan of your national sports because if you aren't you aren't considered a man.

The above measures of manliness are ridiculous, and are no help to any man at any point in history. Because being a man is so loosely defined, peeing standing up or sitting down is but one facet of it.

Oh, and I pee standing up but I'm STILL not considered a man by many people's standards. Just look at my avatar for example.

Call me cruel, but a fat, broke gay dude, who hates sports is not exactly the alpha male.
A true man has to be in control, wheter it's a huge company or just himself. Someone who doesn't have control over his body or career is just life's punching bag.
As for the "real man can't be gay" thing... well, it's obviously unfair, but there is something to it. I mean a real man is a conqueror, he conquers women's hearts with the sheer power of his awesomeness, from what I've seen it doesn't work that way in gay mating rituals.

Kukul why have you been mean to me since the very beginning of me joining this site? It's like I was able to express my opinion openly while you were gone... without fear of being called not a man. I didn't say gay men aren't real men either, I neglected to mention the Spartans.

 

[Iron Mal]

I am comfortable enough in my masculinity that I don't have to ritualise the way I pee to show I am manly, sometimes I stand up and sometimes I sit down, I really don't make an issue out of it.

I think that there are slightly more important things that determine how 'manly' you are (like wrestling bears bare handed).

Call me cruel, but a fat, broke gay dude, who hates sports is not exactly the alpha male.
A true man has to be in control, wheter it's a huge company or just himself. Someone who doesn't have control over his body or career is just life's punching bag.
As for the "real man can't be gay" thing... well, it's obviously unfair, but there is something to it. I mean a real man is a conqueror, he conquers women's hearts with the sheer power of his awesomeness, from what I've seen it doesn't work that way in gay mating rituals.

In response to KulKul, the typical 'must be dominant/sporty and a devil with the ladies' isn't nessercarily a measure of a 'real' man.

I think that a real man doesn't have to be in control as much as they should posess confidence, dominace just makes you an arsehole most of the time while confidence shows that you can take a stand for yourself and others, after all no-one likes being conquered but we all appreciate a person with balls (two different things altogether).

 

[pirateninj4]

Seriously, standing up pee'ing? Would Al Bundy ever decline to sit atop his throne in the bathroom whilst reading a skinmag? I think not.

Real men does not stand above the bathroom throne looking like an idiot. Real men sit down on it and becomes perturbed by existential questions while doing their natural business, unless their mind isn't deeply engaged with the contents of some of the bathroom reading material that is.

Standing up peeing is something only little boys consider to be "manly"...

Ha ha. He's right you know. I hardly ever stand up anymore, I get tired of splashing myself or my pants plus sitting down gives you an excuse to talk to yourself while you're doing your thing.

 

[Agema]

I don't give a toss how anyone pisses, just so long as they get it on target in the urinal or bowl, and particularly don't hit the seat so people can't sit to take a dump without getting it all over their backsides.

 

[BulletMoaf]

im the comfort kind, i sit.
good dog. *woof* yay, ubu.

 

[Kurokami]

Did someone comment about your inability to perform vertically in the toilet?

No, but it just seems like standing up is the only way to go. That is the way it is shown in media. One example from the top of my head, which I don't remember much of so it's a bad example: In Friends, they ridiculed someone who sat while peeing. This makes it seem like sitting is a no-no for guys, since we can stand.
Stupid, I know, and it doesn't matter at all. I was just curious what other people thought.

Its often looked at as a messy half assed way of doing something, which to some fits into the stereotype of men being messy and lazy and women being anal about cleanliness. (the term anal isn't meant to be taken offensively) To me however its just the fact that we've got the ability, do I pee standing up? Yup, its just more comfortable/the way I grew up, on the other hand if my girl friend told me to do otherwise I probably would. (that, may make me less like a man, not cause of the way I pee but my submission (which granted, is only towards woman kind) =P)

 

[Manhattan2112]

A) How could you possibly turn THIS into a thread and
B) How can this many people be interested in your bathroom habits?!

 

[Iron Mal]

I didn't mention dominance anywhere. Having control over your life (that's the requirement I named) is pretty much essential for confidence, isn't it?

'A real man is a conquerer' were your exact words, to conquer and dominate are essentially the same thing, so yes, you did mention dominance.

Control over your life helps with confidence, true (it's not nessercarily essential though) but what you and I consider to be posessing 'control' could be entirely different things altogether, neither of which could be even remotely linked to our self perception (and thus our confidence).

 

[Ghostkai]

Call me cruel, but a fat, broke gay dude, who hates sports is not exactly the alpha male.
A true man has to be in control, wheter it's a huge company or just himself. Someone who doesn't have control over his body or career is just life's punching bag.

Well said to be honest. Spot on.

 

[Joa_Belgium]

What the hell, it doesn't matter if you stand up or sit down while taking a piss. A real man is defined by the responsibilities he takes.

What I'm trying to say is: when a lady is in the house, make sure the toilet seat is down or you're just looking for trouble.

 

[Spygon]

i pee standing up but i think what defines you as a man is what your peeing out of.