Would you consider this cheating?

[Nouw]

Technically it's not but nonetheless, dick move.

 

[fletch_talon]

You've made it obvious to the first girl that you don't like her enough to wait
You've made it obvious to the second girl (assuming she knows the situation) that she was your second choice.

I can understand not wanting to dwell on the first girl or wait around forever. But the way you tell the story makes it sound likeyou're just jumping from girl to girl until you get a yes.

 

[WolfEdge]

You shouldn't be concerned with technicality when it comes to relationships. This isn't a sporting event. You've already stated you felt bad about your actions, and that's what you should go by.

 

[GrimTuesday]

Oh poor you you have multiple girls wanting to date you... Ok so I'm bitter.

I think that she definitely over reacted. She said that she wasn't ready and rejected you, and so you found someone else. It's not cheating, its moving on after being rejected.

 

[DuplicateValue]

No it's not cheating, and unlike a few of the others here, I don't think it was a dick move at all.

She said no, you moved on. It's not like you're gonna sit around waiting for her.
She obviously just got insulted by how easily you moved on from her - it can't be good for her self-esteem I guess.

 

[JCMarksman]

she had her chance

 

[TrollOgerElf]

Cheating is an act of lying, deception, fraud, trickery, imposture, or imposition.
You did none of these.

 

[Intoki]

Well honestly it sounds like because you got blown off by one girl you just jumped on the next one. It may not be cheating, but it makes you look like a shameless dog that'll just go for the next girl, and the next, until she's available.
So no, maybe not cheating. But yeah, you should be slapping yourself in the head. Just because you "weren't official" isn't an excuse, especially if you were actually into her and she realized this.

So in my opinion, you owe her a major apology.

That and

Technically it's not but nonetheless, dick move.

That

Heh, I like how you seem to have a sense of perspective about this - girl says no, instead of falling on your knees you just take it on the chin and maybe go for this other girl who's after a bit of fun. That's fine, y'know? a lot of people here think that if a guy acts this way, he must just be an insensitive manwhore or something. But you're young! if you and this girl wanted to hook up for a bit, then there's no reason to say no. And this other girl really shouldn't have much of a problem with this, if she comes along and you say "yeah, it was alright with her but I still want you" she should realize that it doesn't mean you don't like her.

Yeah, I chalk this one up to her. She'll probably never let this go as well, but it's her fault for getting so pushy about it. I mean, if this was a serious, deep emotional connection sort of thing you two had, then maybe it would be understandable, but if you just kind of like her, then it's fine. She's overreacting, and maybe you should explain to her how you see all this.

Don't listen to this guy

 

[child of lileth]

I don't think it is, but I completely understand why she's pissed at you. She basically thought you'd wait and had an understood agreement that you'd wait to commit to her once her ex was taken care of.

It isn't cheating, but you still unintentionally hurt her that way.

 

[Bon_Clay]

The hell? She was the one still "ending things" with her ex. Unless that meant him stalking her, she was still dealing with emotional ties to someone else.

You asked her out, she rejected you for the time being, you moved on with your life. If she thinks she can put you on lay-away for when its convenient for her, stay away from the dumb ***** altogether.

 

[Sjakie]

you did the only right thing you could do! You should not even feel ashamed, she should though, giving you a line about an ex.
you did not become her doormat by 'waiting patiently', the only person she can blame is herself.

 

[Dags90]

yeah, why not?

I think some people responding are the type who might be described as "burning hot and fast." Thus "I like her" is grounds for significant emotional investment and opportunity.

I wouldn't necessarily call it cheating.
Still it was kind of a stupid move because now she might think you would cheat on her if you were actually dating

Wouldn't that be slightly hypocritical if the implied sex ("seeing" but not dating? seeing her naked, right?) is true? I mean, the girl was either having sex or emotionally cheating on her ex-boyfriend who she 'hasn't completely ended things with yet.'

 

[Druss the Legend]

No, not cheating, but not a smart move either from both of you.
Dating isn't a dibs game, and you really should have told her you weren't going to wait.

 

[vento 231]

She said no, what are you supposed to do? Wait an keep asking, that would just be annoying and creepy. She sounds crazy, you had no commitment to this woman, she struck you down. If I were you, I wouldn't talk to miss crazy anymore.

 

[Slaanax]

I believe you have to be going out with someone to cheat on someone...

 

[Still Life]

This is in no way shape or form cheating. She said no, she has no right to be upset.

Technically. I agree. Perhaps it was prudent to tell her that you were going to continue dating, though.

 

[Tonythion]

No, no you did not. What did she expect you to wait patiently for her while she dealt with some other person?

And it wasn't a dick move for you to ask someone else out after she quasi-rejected you. You're allowed to like two people at once. And who knows how long she was going to make you wait.